Romanus Cullenus
by Caught.you.looking
Summary: AU AH. Edward Cullen is a doctor in ancient Rome. He comes from a wealthy, powerful family and has a devoted wife.  His life is well ordered and calm and there is no reason it shouldn't stay that way. But two new acquaintances are going to change things.
1. Chapter 1

**New story! So excited. I'm going to try my hand at an AH one which is going to be a little different. I'm also setting it a long time ago in ancient Rome, so I'm going to try and keep the writing as in context as I can. I know that the names are going to be all wrong and I considered changing the last name to Cullenus but it made me giggle every time I wrote it so I decided not to.**

**Any and all opinions are welcome.**

Chapter one

The sun baked the sandy streets of Rome as my brother and I trudged reluctantly towards our destination. The dirt of the streets stained my feet and the robes I wore. I did not like going to the market. If I had been sure it would have been safe I would have gladly sent my wife. As it stood this was not an option. The slave market was no place for a woman. It was not really a place where anyone should be but that was not my decision to make. Romans and freed men would not do the kind of work that slaves would do on principle. Why should they? That was what slaves were for.

I took my last deliberate deep breath as my brother and I arrived. Even at a distance I could smell the market. The stench of filth, human filth and lots of it. I felt my brother grip my arm with his massive hand and I looked up, "I can't stand it either, brother. We'll do this quickly." Emmett blue eyes stared into my green; unusually serious.

To anyone who didn't know him his expression would seem threatening, but I recognised discomfort. In fact a lot of expressions looked threatening on Emmett, but only because of his emormous build. Although six feet tall and well-built, I looked small next to my elder brother.

At times like this I actually found his bulky presence reassuring, as I had when I was a child and I trusted that all I needed was my brother to protect me.

But in truth, I didn't like being here and there was nothing I could do to quell the feeling. Regardless of the place, I didn't like the necessity to own slaves, but I had little choice. I spent so much time away from home and one woman couldn't handle it alone. Not even one as tough as my wife. We already had one male slave, a young man named Michael and a girl whose name was Lauren. They had been with us almost a year. In another year I would free them. I never kept a slave longer than two years, I always freed them; it was my father's habit. My brother and I both adopted it in turn.

Now we were going to have three slaves. We could afford it and another would be helpful. It was another one I could, and would, free in two years. I nodded to Emmett and we walked into the market. It was one of the most undignified places I had ever had the misfortune to see and in my time with the army I had seen many. As a doctor I saw the most truly horrifying sights.

The very sands of Rome seemed dirty here, and it seemed unlikely that they could ever be made clean. The smell seemed to slither through the air; saturating it. The smell that was coming from the rusty cages filled with people. Thin, underfed, beaten people. I wished that I could afford to buy them all, but if I did I wouldn't be able to feed them. Besides, more would arrive tomorrow.

Reminding myself that I was here to help at least one of these poor souls I started to examine the people. They peered out from between the bars; terrified of being chosen and afraid of being left there forever. "What about him?" asked Emmett.

He pointed to a very young man with darker skin. I couldn't identify his homeland but he looked sturdy and strong. I nodded, "Good eye. He looks too young to be so big."

"Well, if he's still growing you might have to alter the doorways. Come here lad," my brother Emmett beckoned to the boy. He hesitated but then shuffled forward past the others and stood in front of the bars. "Yeah, he's a big one all right. You understand me boy?"

"Yes." There was trace of an accent in his voice but he spoke clearly enough.

"And he understands. That's a good start right there." Emmett seemed quite proud of his find and I had to admit that he had a right to be. He was a strapping lad and I got the feeling that if I was fair with him he would work well and be loyal. I was rarely wrong when I got those kinds of impressions.

I nodded at Emmett who smiled broadly and then I looked over my shoulder, trying to spot the trader here. My eyes fell on all the miserable people crammed into the cages and I felt another stirring. It was similar to guilt. Why was my life so good compared to these people? Why did I have that priviledge? Why had the god's we worshipped chosen me?

I was trying to ignore all the blank expressions around me when something caught my eye. I thought I was looking at an empty cage for a moment but no, there were heaps of rags on the bottom. I was wondering why there was an empty cage when all the others were so full and then the rags moved. It was such a feeble movement that I wasn't sure if I had imagined it. But then I heard a very weak cough.

Perhaps it was just curiousity. As a doctor I naturally wanted to see what the problem was, it was my job to help. As I neared the cage I could see two figures, one was lying on the floor and the other was huddled on top. It was unusual to see only two people. All the other cages were crammed with people, waiting to be bought.

Once I was close enough I bent down for a better look and was immeditely startled. I almost toppled over in shock as the figure on top leapt to its feet with a hissing noise. It was a woman, she was short and her hair inky black hair had been cut close to her head. Her figure was slim and girlish but I guessed her age as mid-twenties. I looked again at her hair and saw that it had been hacked off in tufts. It had probably been done as a punishment, perhaps she had tried to escape. It was done to demoralize the women but it had not had the desired effect here.

This small female was clearly some kind of devil. She was dressed in the usual rags but I barely noticed them; her eyes had my attention absolutely. The expression on her face was one of pure malevolence. She hissed and spat at me, warning me away. At first I thought that she was afraid that I might hurt her, but then I realised that she was crouched over the other figure on the floor of the cage.

This one too was female but other than that there was little that was similar. They both had very pale skin, much lighter than was common in Rome where the sun soon made it's power clear, but the figure on the floor was taller and perhaps a little younger. Her limbs seemed oddly delicate. She had long brown hair that would fall past her shoulders if she was stood up and she was sweating slightly. There was no colour at all in her face, unlike her shorter friend who looked livid enough to attack me if the opportunity presented itself.

Slaves did not usually behave this way, they were beaten into submission as quickly as possible so they could be sold easily. I wondered at the constitution of this small girl; it would obviously take a lot to break her, yet there were no lash marks on what I could see of her skin.

Emmett had wondered over to see what had caught my attention and the small imp's hissing grew louder in response. "Easy girl," I said automatically. Then I was ashamed, I sounded as though I was speaking to an animal.

"Which one caught you're eye, brother?" Emmett raised his eyebrows suggestively but I ignored the implication. I might not always have been faithful to my wife, Tanya but I had never interrferred with my slaves. That way lay trouble and Emmett knew it.

"I think that one is unwell," I pointed to the prostrate girl. I knelt down again and stared at the imp. She met my eyes harshly, her lip still drawn back in a sneer, "Listen to me woman. I'm a doctor and I don't intend to hurt you or you're friend." She looked at me in surprise, perhaps she had forgotten what it was like to be spoken to politely. "I think that you should let me check your friend's heart and lungs." The girl hissed quietly again, "I won't touch her unless you say I can."

The little imp stared at me for a few more seconds then abruptly she nodded and skittered backwards a few inches. Emmett made a concerned sound, "That little thing might bite you Edward."

I didn't break eye contact, "No she will not." I said, absolutely convinced of the fact. I reached slowly through the bars of the cage towards her and her friend. She had moved back slightly but she was still close enough for me to feel her breath on my skin. My fingers closed around the wrist of the uconscious girl. I found her pulse and counted out the beats. It was a lot weaker than was healthy. I moved my hand to her chest. I wished that there was some way I could listen to it, but this would have to do. Her breathing was steady but my hand only rose a little.

During my brief examination I could feel the other girl's eyes watching my every movement. Her devoted attention spoke to me, I had seen it before. My mother watched my father that way, she watched Emmett and I that way. I knew what her expression meant, it was unconditional love. I wondered if they were sisters, after all siblings did not always look alike. Emmett and I were proof of that.

I withdrew my hand from the cage and stood up again, concerned for the girl. Her heart and lungs didn't worry me nearly as much as the heat I felt coming off her skin. The fever would prove most dangerous and might even be causing the other symptoms. Even if it did not kill her, there was a chance she would die as a result. Slave traders didn't like to risk their property spreading disease around to each other.

"Well?" said Emmett, "Will she live?"

I immediately wished my brother had chosen his words more carefully. The little imp in the cage seemed to tense all over, the colour drained from her face as she waited for an answer I didn't want to give. Her eyes bored into my face and I found it hard to speak, "I...I am not sure. She needs care."

"I look after her," the girl spoke quietly and with a different accent than the boy and she still managed to startle us both. Her silence had seemed absolute; perhaps a form of defence but now she looked afraid. Afraid for her friend I guessed.

"I'm sure," I replied, "But..." my voice trailed off. My eyes had drifted down to the other girl. She truly was fragile looking, even her features were slight. Her skin reminded me of alabaster and I realised that I found her beautiful, even sweating and covered in dirt. With that realisation another followed, I did not want her or her friend to die here. I looked up at Emmett and he grinned.

"I thought you were getting a man?" I did usually do just that, as did Emmett and my father. Particularly as I spent so much time away from home, a man could serve as protection as well. Though I couldn't imagine anyone wanting to fight the imp in the cage.

"That girl will live if she comes home with me, if she stays here she'll die," I said simply.

The imp gave a gasping sob and clutched at her friend's hand. All of her earlier hostility gone, her voice almost broke with tears, "Then please take her. I beg you," it did not sound as though begging came easy to the girl. She tried though and her sincerity was obvious. I could see that the idea of separation caused her pain, but she wanted her friend to live.

I knew I was on the cusp of doing something stupid and I recognised that this was the moment to stop myself from going any further. It was madness to take home a sick slave. It truly was, but I already knew that I was going to do that much. Even without the girl's plea, I was already decided. But now I was about to make things worse...or better, depending on your point of view. I sighed and crouched down one more time, "I came here to buy a man slave, but I could be persuaded to take a woman. However your friend here can't do the work I need doing yet." I let that sink in for a moment, "Could you?"

She stared at me, confused for a moment, then her eyes widened, "You...you would take us both? Away from here? Together?" She clearly couldn't believe was she was hearing.

I nodded, "Yes, but I want something from you."

"Anything," she breathed.

"I want your loyalty and your promise that you will work hard for me, that you will do as I ask. If you agree I will do everything I can to help your friend." I knew I would have done so anyway, but I was sure that this would be the best way to tame this girl. If I gave her a reason to be grateful to me there would be no need to break her and I didn't want to have to. I found that I admired her fire; I didn't want her to lose it.

"I swear to the gods I will do anything you ask...Dominus." Again I felt the sincerity in her gaze.

"What is your name?" I asked.

"Alice." She said and I could hear the excitement she was trying to hide in her voice.

"Then I believe we have a deal, Alice." The imp...my imp nodded and I got to my feet without another word.

I stared around and saw a tall black man some distance away. He was pushing food into one of the cages. I nodded and Emmett followed as I headed towards him.

"You came here for a man and you are going home with two women. I'm sure Tanya will be delighted." Emmett said witha chuckle.

"I'm sure," I said my voice heavy with irony. I could imagine the situation that would greet me when I returned.

"What will you tell her?"

"That I chose the slaves I wanted. I have to pay for them after all." I could hear the defensiveness in my voice. I didn't want to analyse my actions too much. I wasn't going to change my mind so there was no point, "Anyway, I don't think that little devil will disappoint. She will work hard."

"What of the other one? What if she carries some contagious disease?"

"She doesn't, her friend would have caught it from her. No, most likely her problems are simpler. She needs food and rest and to be out of this baking sun. The things all people need."

"I don't think I'd have the nerve to take them home to my wife," said Emmett, with a trace of horror and a little amusement in his voice.

"Not all people fear their wives as much as you do, Emmett." I didn't add that I too was a little afraid of Rosalie.

"Not all people love their wives as much as I do, Edward." The condescending tone of his voice annoyed me a little too much.

"You're welcome, by the way." I snapped. I knew it wasn't a nice thing to do but when he mocked me it shut him up to be reminded that he had me to thank for Rosalie, twice over.

Emmett instantly looked apologetic. It was the one thing he was never insincere about. "Yes, thank you again brother."

I sighed, my irritation gone as quickly as it had come. "As I have said, you're welcome."

Emmett changed the subject, "I'm only half serious anyway." He glanced over his shoulder. "I don't know if I could have left them here. I still wouldn't have taken them home though. I would just have given them to you as a gift." He grinned at me widely.

"What a wonderful gift. Two women, one of them unconscious." I laughed, I couldn't help it.

"My way they would have been a gift, now you're going to pay money for them."

"True," I said with a shrug. I couldn't fault his logic there.

"But if you are not going to buy that boy I think I might. Rosalie wants a new horse and she doesn't like the way our slaves handle them. That boy looks strong enough to handle anything." He indicated back the way we had come.

I waved a hand, "Of course. If you think you can find a job for him. I'm sure he would prefer it to here."

We neared the man, "Good day citizen," I said loudly enough to get his attention over the hoards of scrabbling slaves. The man turned and nodded, "I would like to purchase two slaves. My brother would like one, if you would be so kind."

XXX

The man had driven a hard bargain. He had confided to us that he was new working at the market and he wanted to make a good first deal. Still, Emmett had paid more for the boy, Jacob...and yet his wife would be happier.

Alice was staring at us both avidly as we crossed towards the cage. She looked as though she couldn't quite believe what was happening. When the man opened the cage I saw her chest heave and I wondered for the first time, how long they had been here. The man nodded and clasped my arm and then led Emmett off to collect the boy. I looked down at my 'property'. That was how he had described them, it made me feel ill.

"I'm going to pick her up," I said to Alice. She nodded cautiously but she moved out of the way so I could get my arms around the other girl's form. She seemed to weigh almost nothing and she whimpered as I moved her.

"It's going to be allright beautiful," I heard Alice whisper, "You're going to be allright."

I began to revise my earlier opinions. Perhaps they were lovers rather than sisters. Alice hadn't corrected me when I called them 'friends' after all. As I got to my feet with the frail girl in my arms I looked down at her. In the sun her skin seemed to glow and I was again struck with how ethereal she looked. She was a pale Venus in my arms and I misgave. Perhaps what I was doing was not a good thing. It was not good to view ones slaves in such a way.

"Shall we go Dominus?" Alice's voice penetrated my momentary haze and I looked into her big eyes. They were wet and she was biting her lip but I knew she was not sad.

What could I do? Tell her that I had changed my mind and that I was going to leave them here? I did not have it in me to be so cruel. I looked again at the girl in my arms. Yes, she was beautiful. Alice was right, but I wouldn't let that matter. I would help her get well, then she and Alice would live with us for two years. Then I would free them both and the cycle would begin again. That was how I did things.

I cradled the girl against my chest and nodded to Alice, "Yes, we'll go now."

XXX

Emmett's new slave, the boy Jacob guided our horses to my house as directed and took the girl from me as I dismounted. When I had righted my clothing I turned to take her back and saw the boy staring at her. I didn't blame him, she was a beauty, but I was still irrationally irritated. I cleared my throat and held out my arms. The boy started and handed her to me, keeping his eyes on the ground.

I took her from him without a word and Alice scampered to my side, climbing down from Emmett's horse unaided. "Would you like to come in?" I asked my brother.

Emmett gave me a grin, "Not today brother. I should get the new boy home for Rosalie to approve." I suspected he wanted to get home for other reasons too. He didn't like being away from Rosalie for long periods of time. It was the main reason he had resigned from the army and focused on building his reputation in the construction world. I nodded and thanked him for accompanying me to the market.

I led Alice into the courtyard of my home and invited her to take a seat. We had a large table and benches in the yard for eating outdoors, but she shook her head staring about her in wonder. Michael appeared and went out to tend to my horse, Seth. He was good with animals and I knew I would be sorry to lose him when the time came.

Deciding to face the music immediately, I called out for Tanya. She would hear my voice wherever she was, as our house surrounded the yard in blocks. The main building was directly ahead of me with a small reception chamber before it. It consisted of the main room for entertaining and living, a family room and an enclosed garden with a bathing pool. Our bedroom, bathroom and two others for guests were directly above this.

To the left there were the servants quarters and and the stables where we kept six horses. On the right were the kitchen and washrooms. Our home was more than sufficient for our needs, in fact for only two people it might be considered extravagant, but I agreed to every improvement Tanya suggested.

She didn't like living here much so I tried to keep her happy by appealing to her love of excess. Tanya frequently requested that we move out of the city. We could certainly afford to do so, but I liked the constant activity and insisted that we stay put. I also argued that it was easier for me to get patients this way, when I was not travelling.

Tanya appeared suddenly on the balcony off our bedroom, cutting into my thoughts. She stared down at me and my entourage for a moment.

"But you said you were going to get a man slave." Tanya actually took it better than I expected. She just seemed confused.

"Well, I decided on these two instead." I prayed to the god's that she would let it go. Although Tanya was a good person she didn't seem to feel as I did about our good fortune. She had always had money and her first husband, my second cousin Peter had been wealthy. It was just the way things were as far as she was concerned. She had the true arrogance of the rich; she assumed she was entitled to her luxury somehow. If I tried to explain that my conscience wouldn't allow me to leave these two girls to their fate, I doubted she would understand.

"But why?" Tanya persisted. She didn't realise that this wasn't the right time for this conversation. Alice was stood close behind me and I was still carrying her unconscious friend.

The girl did not weigh very much but I was still holding an adult in my now aching arms. "Because I decided to." I snapped at her. I rarely spoke to her roughly and she looked surprised. "I had a good feeling about this one, her name's Alice. And her friend will be fine soon."

Tanya recovered quickly and pretended she hadn't noticed my bad mood. "They will have to share a room. We only have one."

I nodded curtly and she strode back into the house. I was about to stalk away, but I was stopped when my father suddenly appeared in the doorway. He had obviously been waiting for me to return. "Greetings father." I said, sighing inwardly. Wonderful. "If you would excuse me a moment."

My father, Carlisle, nodded and waved a hand, "Of course son, take your time. I'm in no hurry."

I turned to the left and led Alice through to the bedroom that had been prepared for our new man. I lay the sleeping girl down onto the bed. Her cheeks seemed to have gained a little colour, pink stained the white marble now and I reached out to check her heart again. It was still beating unsteadily and if anything her skin was warmer than before.

Moving her about had probably not helped, but it was obviously better than the alternative. As soon as I straightened and moved away, Alice instantly dashed to her side. I would not need to worry about this patient, she would be well tended. Though I wouldn't have minded tending to her myself, she certainly was a beauty.

I shook myself and and spoke quietly. "I need to go and speak with my father. I will ask Michael to bring you some water so you can wash. And some food, you must be hungry."

Alice looked up at me and I couldn't understand the expression on her face; at least I was sure it wasn't hostile, "Thank you, Dominus."

I nodded and, feeling a little uncomfortbale, I left the room. I passed Michael on my way to the main room and gave him his insructions. Then when I couldn't put it off anymore, I took a deep breath and joined my father. Ordinarily I looked forward to his visits, but then I didn't usually quarrel with my wife in his presence. He was never harsh with me, he didn't need to be. If a trace of a frown crossed his face I knew he disapproved and that meant I had done the wrong thing.

"Again, greetings father. What a nice surprise." I fixed a cheerful smile on my face and embraced him warmly.

Carlisle couldn't hide his small smile, but he returned my welcome. "You might be pleased to see me son, but I don't think you liked my timing." He raised an eyebrow and for a moment looked so much like Emmett it shocked me. Other than my bronze coloured hair, which I had gotten from my grandfather Aro, I looked very like our father. I have his same build and the same jaw. The only thing I had in common with my mother, Esme, was my green eyes.

But the expression he wore now was so similar to my brother, that I knew there was no point in keeping up the charade. He would see through it anyway. I dropped the pretense of manners and my shoulders drooped, "Did I mention how annoying it is that you know me so well? It's one matter with mother..."

"I know son, I'm sorry." Carlisle clapped me on the shoulder, "Just try to..."

I knew where he was going with this and I tried to head him off. "I know, I know. I do try."

"It's difficult for her, surely you can understand that." Carlisle looked at me hopefully; he had never entirely gotten over his guilt about my marriage to Tanya. He felt as though he had let me down somehow. He and my mother had not approved, but Esme had been grieving for her favourite cousin Peter. He had been a lot younger than her, only a few years older than me in fact but he and Esme had been close. My father had been distracted by my mother's grief and it had been decided quickly

"I do uderstand and honestly, you just happened upon us on a bad day. When I went to the slave market I was planning on buying a man. Instead I bought two women, one of whom is unconscious and running a fever." I sighed and ran my hands through my hair. I tried not to do it too much, it made my hair stand up in all directions. "And I knew that she would not be pleased. I just...did it anyway."

"Why did you do it then son?" Carlisle's voice was soothing. He wasn't even trying to sooth me, it was just the effect it had.

I sighed and tried to put my feelings at the time into words, but they wouldn't go. They were not rational after all. "I just couldn't leave them there." I said finally. "The sick one would have died and the other...well, I don't think Alice would want to live without her friend."

"It's not wrong to feel compassion. Please don't think it is," Carlisle was looking at me in concern. "I'm proud that you want to help people."

"It's not that it's...why these two imparticular? I just couldn't leave them behind. When I felt the girl's heart beat and realised how likely it was that she would die..." my voice trailed off again. "I just couldn't leave them."

"I'm glad you couldn't son." He gave me a smile and I felt lighter. It seemed that no matter how old I became, I would always be glad of my father's approval as I would always consider his disapproval. His opinion meant everything to me.

Feeling better about the world in general I got to my feet, "I should go and apologise to my wife."

Carlisle nodded, "I only came by to see if you would oblige by hosting a birthday party for your mother? I would like to surprise her and have the whole family for dinner."

"Of course, I would be honoured. I will let Tanya plan everything. She will be delighted, everything will be beautiful and Michael will be ordered about mercilessly for the next month." I said with a grin.

Carlisle got to his feet and thanked me, "I'm sure it will be wonderful. I will handle the invitations, but remember to keep it a secret." I nodded and escorted my father to the door, sending my love to my mother.

Tanya came down the stairs as I re-entered the house. Her expression was guarded and I began to feel guilty. She had not been rude to me, she had merely asked why I had changed my mind about the man slave. Carlisle was right, he usually was.

"I apologise for my manner before. Going to the market put me in a bad mood." I said quietly. It was a reasonable excuse.

Tanya seemed to accept it. She smiled hesitantly, "Are you hungry? Lauren has just served dinner."

In fact I was ravenous though I hadn't noticed it up until then. "Yes, shall we?"

I seated Tanya before sitting opposite her. She still looked on guard, but I had a secret that I suspected would help with her mood, "My father asked if you would be so good as to host a party for Esme's birthday? Just family, so around twenty people?" I asked the question as though it was of little consequence but her face lit up immediately.

XXX

After dinner Tanya announced her intention to retire. The looked she gave me implied that she would like me to join her, but I couldn't seem to summon the energy. I made my excuses and she went alone.

I tried to tell myself that I didn't know why I wasn't in the mood, but I did. I was curious about the two young girls and how they were doing. I was so curious that I knew that I would not be able to concentrate on anything else.

There was no reason that I should not go and check, but for some reason I was nervous about doing so. After several minutes of starting to go and then changing my mind, I decided I was behaving like a child. At the very least I should go and check on the girl...it occurred to me that maybe I should find out her name. I got to my feet and headed out into the well lit courtyard. Dark had fallen completely now and the sounds of the city were everywhere. Rome never really seemed to sleep, there was always something happening. If not here then nearby.

I moved quietly down the darkened passage, if Alice and her friend were asleep I didn't want to disturb them. There were no torches lit in here and there was only the illumination the moon provided.

As I rounded a corner that put me in sight of their door, I was startled. There was a shape huddled against the door. It was too big to be either one of the women and for a moment I wondered if it was an animal. But it wasn't. It was a man.

Michael was hunched over peering through a small gap between the door and the jam. I could see that there was light coming from inside the room so the women were probably awake.

A rage I had not felt in many years surged through my veins and I almost attacked him noisily then and there. But I remembered in time that today I had gained two new members of my household. Their first night here should be an improvement on their previous surroundings, it should not be more frightening.

I moved silently towards Michael, I didn't even pause as I slipped my arm around his face and covered his mouth. For a moment he tried to struggle, but I hissed, "Silence!" and he stopped immediately.

Keeping my grip on his face, I dragged him out of the corridor. Once we were back in the courtyard I flung him away from me onto the ground. He cowered on the floor with his hands over his head. He was the very picture of subservience.

I paced back and forth for a few seconds, still trying to get my temper under control. Finally I stood over him and stared imperiously down, "Michael, would you say that I am a fair master?" He trembled a little, I did not raise my voice but I was confident I didn't need to. My feelings were clear even as I hissed my words, "Answer me!"

"Yes Dominus, very fair." Michael mumbled his words to the ground, he didn't raise his head at all.

"I am so glad to hear it." I said sarcastically. "I happen to agree with you. I believe that I always try to treat people fairly. Tell me, in the year you have been here, have I ever had to beat you?"

"No Dominus."

"No, I didn't think so," as I spoke I walked over to the stables and selected a heavy leather riding crop from the row on the wall. "You know Michael, most slaves do get beaten by their master's regularly."

"Yes Dominus, I know." The trembling of his voice was almost pitiful, but I felt nothing. Men who liked to spy on women might one day be tempted to take it further. I needed to squash it now.

"Then let me tell you something else. I have never beaten a slave yet." I swished the crop through the air and it made a very menacing sound. Then I knealt down and grasped his chin again. Once I had dragged his eyes up to mine I glared hard at him. "But that is only because I have never had to. And as I think of what you just did I am coming dangerously close to beating you to death."

The colour drained out of Michael's face, "Dominus I..."

"Silence!" I hissed "I am only going to say this once, if you lay a hand on what is mine, I will cut it off. If I catch you looking at them again I will pluck out your eyes and if you ever step down that hall again I will remove your feet." Sweat broke out over his forehead and I let go of his chin. "Am I making myself plain?"

"Y...Yes, Dominus." Michael's voice was trembling violently.

"From now on you will sleep in the stables with the rest of the animals. Once you have finished you tasks for the day you will retire there and not leave until the morning. You will do this every day until I decide otherwise." I pointed to his new room.

"Yes, D...Dominus."

"Go. Now." Michael scrabbled to his feet and almost ran to the stables. I wondered if I had overdone it. I had no real intention of mutilating the boy, but then I realised that I didn't care. His behaviour appalled me and if threatening him prevented a repeat it was worth it.

I took a few calming breaths. I had almost forgotten what I had been doing in the servant's rooms in the first place. Now I fought to steady myself as I retraced my steps. When I reached the wooden door I knocked. It was opened a crack by Alice. Her expression was almost agressive at first, then she saw who her visitor was and she relaxed infinitesimally.

She stepped back and allowed me into the room, "Did someone bring you something to eat?" I asked. My eyes automatically drifted to the bed. The girl was still sleeping, perhaps oblivious to her change of location. Alice had cleaned her up and her skin looked even paler than before. I wondered if she and Alice had been taken captive somewhere in the north; somewhere where the sun was not as strong.

Alice nodded, "Yes thank you Dominus. Michael brought us some food." I doubted that she intended to show her feelings so clearly, but I could see them anyway. She liked Michael about as much as I did right now.

"Has he bothered you in some way?" I could feel the rage coming back again. If she told me now that he had done something I would take no responsibiliity for my actions.

"No, he hasn't." She didn't say the word 'yet'. Her voice was low but her eyes watched me closely.

"He won't bother either of you. I have seen to it, you have my word. He will be sleeping elsewhere from now on, you and your friend can have a room each when she is recovered." I met her gaze squarely, "If he does anything he shouldn't, you must tell me immediately."

Alice nodded and she let out a breath I hadn't noticed she was holding, and for the first time she smiled a little. It changed her face entirely and for a moment I saw under the imp to the girl. I returned the smile and then turned to the bed. "Has she woken up yet?"

"She drank some water and soup before. But she didn't seem to really wake up." Alice was frowing in concern.

"That's a good thing. Try to make sure that she drinks plenty of water." I reached down and checked her temperature again. She still felt very warm. I would have to tell Alice to keep her body uncovered if she got any warmer.

"Dominus?" I heard Alice speak behind me but I was having trouble tearing my eyes away from the girl. I had just noticed how her hair lay on the bed. It was an unusual shade of brown and it was distracting me.

I managed to concentrate enough to say, "Hmm?"

"Did you want to have me now?" Her voice had become tiny.

"Hmmm...what?" It took me a minute to accept that I had heard what I thought I had heard. Alice thought I was expecting her to...

"Did...did you want to have me now?"

I got to my feet and turned around at the same time. I was not at my most graceful. Alice was watching me with wide eyes. My voice just wouldn't work. When she reached for the neck of her dress I knew I was out of time. "No, Alice no. Stop. You don't have to do that."

She just looked confused, "But you said..."

"What did I say? When?" I couldn't understand what had led to this moment. If anything my interest was directed at her friend. And I had squashed that impulse immediately if not thoroughly enough.

"You said that I would have...that I should do anything you ask. I thought..." Her face was colouring and I knew that she was very embarassed.

I knew that I would have to handle this carefully if it was not to become a problem. "Oh no. No." I gripped the top of her arms. "I am honoured that you would offer yourself like this. Truly, Alice. But that is not why I bought you and your friend. I am not the kind of man who interferes with their slaves."

"But, men..." Alice bit her trembling lip.

I had a horrible feeling I knew what she was about to say. If I had taken advantage of her offer, I would not be the first one to do so. I knew that many men did bed their slaves regularly, and I couldn't claim moral superiority. I had spent my share of time at the city's brothels. But those women were professional, it was a rationalisation but I believed the difference was an important one. "Alice, I am different than them. I won't do that to you." I was horrified to see Alice's eyes filling with tears. "Please don't cry. I am very flattered but I just don't do that."

"No, it's just...I've always hated...and I thought it would..."

I heard what she was trying to say, "It's allright. It's going to be different here. You will both be safe here."

Alice nodded, "Thank you Dominus."

There was so much raw gratitude in her expression that it almost made me uncomfortable. A small part of me wanted to ask her about it, but in truth I really didn't want to know. "Get some sleep now Alice, Lauren will probably want to work you hard tomorrow."

She nodded, there were still tears on her face but again she looked happy. I smiled and let myself out of the room. I was still angry and I wasn't sure why, but the idea that someone had forced themselves on Alice and her friend appalled me. I attributed it in part to the fact that her friend seemed so helpless. I assumed that she was not always so, but still the images plagued me.

I was half way out of the servants quarters before it occurred to me that I still had not asked Alice the name of her friend. I turned around and knocked on the door again. Alice opened it wide this time. She seemed a little more relaxed and I wondered how afraid she been today; she had been expecting me to visit for a different reason after all.

"I meant to ask you, about your friend."

"Yes?" She seemed confused and for some reason I found it embarassing that I didn't know her name. I had bought her from the market and I hadn't bothered to ask something so basic.

"What is her name?"

Alice smiled, "In our original language, her name is Bella."

"Thank you Alice, good night."

"Good night, master."

She closed the door quietly and I started back towards the main room. I had bought a slave whose name literally meant 'beautiful' in my language. How appropriate.


	2. Chapter 2

**A/N Thanks so much to x123 and weekitty who took the time to review the first chapter of this story. It makes it worth updating :) All opinions are welcome.**

XXX

Chapter Two

Michael's eyes were firmly on the ground when he came out to relieve me of my horse. He hadn't met my gaze in almost two weeks, ever since the night when I had threatened him. On the other hand, I had had no indication that he had broken my rules either. If this was the case then I considered it well worth the trouble. I nodded to him curtly and strode past him into the house.

As soon as I entered the courtyard I could hear sounds from the kitchen. When I went in I found Lauren preparing dinner for this evening. Emmett and Rosalie were joining us and Tanya always liked to ensure that we had a good meal prepared for their visits. She and Rosalie harboured a lot of mutual hostility under a thin mask of civility. It tended to make these dinners tense.

Alice was washing clothes in a metal tub, and she was humming to herself cheerfully. She didn't seem to have moved since I left the morning, "Is this what you do while I am out earning a living? Sit and relax in the kitchen?" I had taken on patients while I decided whether or not to go abroad with the army again. I was in a good position, as any legion was happy to allow a doctor to travel with them.

"Exactly the opposite Dominus," said Alice with a newly acquired twinkle in her eye. She held up a hand and pointed across the courtyard. On the other side, near the servants quarters I could see sheets and robes strung up to dry, at least four lines worth of fabric was airing in the sun. Every piece of cloth hanging there was brilliant white with not a mark on them.

I knew for a fact that there had been no washing drying when I had left this morning, "You did all of these in one day?" I asked, surprised. Though I shouldn't have been, since the morning after she had arrived Alice had been surpassing my expectations. She wasn't afraid of getting her hands dirty and attacked every new job with enthusiasm. Even Tanya had been forced to grudgingly admit that she was a good worker.

Alice nodded proudly, "I also helped Lauren to peel the vegetables. Then I moved away from the food slowly."

I laughed aloud, it was the only thing the little imp was no good at. She was willing according to Lauren but not very able. It did not really matter though as she did everything else so well. "Is my wife inside?" I asked turning to go.

"No Dominus," Lauren spoke for the first time since I had entered. "She went out with mistress Didyme. She left word that she would be back quickly."

"Well, in that case would you ask Michael to fill the tub so I can take a bath? I'm just going to check on my last patient." I left the kitchen and strode across the courtyard.

It was a mark of trust that Alice didn't follow me and I took it as such. The first time she had allowed me to be alone with her friend was only a few days ago but I had known it was a big step for her. She was starting to trust me and I didn't want to ruin it.

It would have been even happier about it if I felt that I deserved that trust. But as hard as I tried to hide it, I had to accept that I liked visiting Bella. It was a stupid thing to enjoy. Alice assured me that she was still taking food and water in a semi-conscious state, I had never seen her like that. Whenever I saw her, Bella was deep in slumber.

The truth was that she lived up to her name. I had thought that she was beautiful when I had seen her in a cage at the slave market. Now that Alice had cleaned her up, she was simply radiant. I had never reacted in such a way to a woman before, let alone one that I had yet to speak to. There was just something about her that drew me. I didn't believe that it was just her appearance. She was beautiful it was true but I had known many beautiful women in my life and their effect couldn't compare. There was just something intoxicating about Bella. Even silent, I craved her company.

I made my way to the room that the girls still shared and pushed open the door. Bella had rolled onto her side, her hair was splayed over the sheets and one of her feet was stuck out. I smiled involuntarily at the picture she presented. I touched her forehead and was pleased to note that her temperature was down a little today. I had thought that it was improving yesterday, but now I was sure. I checked her heart and found that the beats were becoming more even which was another good sign.

I was placing the covers back round Bella's arm when she shifted in her sleep. I was startled and pulled my hand back as though she had burned me. Bella twisted for a moment, then she called out quietly for Alice.

I was about to summon her friend when I noticed that her eyes were moving although they were closed. She was dreaming. I took her hand in mine again and pressed it gently, "It's allright Bella. Alice is close and you are both safe."

I whispered the words close to her ear and took a deep breath in. Despite the fact that she had been lying in this bed for two weeks, Alice had clearly been taking excellent care of her. She smelled clean and delicious and before I moved away I inhaled again.

"You can sleep Bella. You are safe now." To my astonishment, Bella smiled in her sleep and squeezed my hand for a second. Then she rolled onto her side again and let me go.

I sat down on the one chair in the room. For the first time I let myself be sure that she would recover. I had never thought that she would not, but the length of her recovery time had been worrying me. Now I was convinced that she would be awake in a matter of days and I was suddenly more cheerful than I had been for some time. I got to my feet and made sure Bella was covered. Then I walked back through the courtyard to the kitchen.

Alice still hadn't moved from her spot, "Bella just startled me to death." The imp was half out of her seat before I realised my mistake, "No Alice, I'm sorry she hasn't woken up yet. She just started talking in her sleep and it surprised me."

Alice sank back into her chair with a small smile, "It's even worse when you're trying to sleep next to her believe me."

I returned her smile and headed back into the house. I decided to go upstairs and take my bath and definitely not imagine what it would be like to sleep beside Bella.

XXX  
>Tanya returned home just as I was getting out of the bath, "I'm sorry, I thought I would be home by the time you got back." She immediately started stripping off her clothes, Rosalie and Emmett were due to arrive in less than an hour. Tanya had been known to spend three hours choosing her clothes. I hoped that she had decided that this morning.<p>

Michael handed me a towel which I wrapped around my waist, "You can go now. Make sure everything's ready for my brother's arrival."

"Yes sir," Michael gave a deeper than necessary bow. Whenever I felt sorry for him I pictured him leering over Bella and Alice. It helped.

Once he had left the room I smiled at Tanya, "How was my favourite aunt?" Not that Didyme was actually my aunt. She was in fact my great aunt by marriage. Although my name was Cullen, my family was really the Volturi. The whole of our existing family descended from three wealthy brothers, Aro, Marcus and Cauis Volturi. Aro was the eldest, he and his wife Sulpicia were my maternal grandfather and mother. The youngest of the three by several years, Marcus was married to Didyme. They had two sons Liam and Peter, the latter of the two had been Tanya's husband of course.

"She's well. But wondering why she's not a great great aunt yet." Tanya's voice was deliberately light but I could hear the feeling behind it. Tanya's desire for a baby had been growing for some time now. She had wanted children before we were married; when they would have had Peter for a father. I didn't think it mattered much to her who the father was. She just wanted to be a mother. After five years of marriage I couldn't really blame her.

There was only one problem, I didn't want to be a father, not yet. I knew that it was selfish, I was away for such long periods and Tanya must get lonely. Also, I was aware that most women would have managed to get themselves with child by now regardless of what their husbands wanted. Unfortunately for Tanya, I was a doctor and I knew at which times of the month it would be unwise to touch her.

She had tried various methods to get around this problem but I had resisted all of them. It was a constant aggravation to her. I didn't want to fight with her and so I tried to keep the focus on my aunt, "She's a grandmother, surely that's enough to keep her busy."

"I just think she misses having babies around. Maggie is growing up quickly, almost four. She joined us this afternoon. She's getting to be so grown up. She still calls me aunt." Tanya's voice was quiet but clear and she seemed unwilling to look at me.

"If she likes it and you don't mind then it's harmless."

Tanya nodded but I could tell that there was more coming, "Edward, I'm afraid sometimes that I will never be able to make Didyme a great great aunt; never make Esme a grandmother."

I sighed. "Tanya, these things take time."

"They take more than simple time. They take your husband wanting to touch you." I could hear her voice was about to break and I felt a strangling guilt. She knew that I deliberately held off when there was a likelihood of a child, and I had thought that I was being so subtle.

"Tanya, I'm sorry, I just don't feel ready to..."

"It's not..." she looked at me with tears in her eyes, "Why is what you want always so much more important than what I want?"

I took a deep breath and walked over to my wife, because that is what she was, my wife. I needed to start respecting that fact. I turned her face to mine and kissed her purposefully. Tanya moaned softly into my kiss.

I held her close tangling my fingers in her blond curls. Ordinairily, her hair was my favourite feature. I liked the way it curled around her neck and face, but today it just felt itchy. It irritated my skin and made it hard for me to concentrate on what I was doing.

Tanya seemed to notice nothing. She clung to me fiercely, her hot mouth trailing down my neck. I took a moment to be glad that I hadn't bothered getting dressed. It would save time. Tanya began to pull off what was left of her clothing and I quickly moved to help her.

I was not usually this unfocused. I didn't take my priviledges with Tanya perhaps as often as some husbands, but when I did I had no complaints. She was at least as good as any other woman that I had been with and yet today I couldn't relax.

Her fingers felt sticky on my clean skin, she smelled of Rome and Tanya, no different than usual but the scent was not pleasing. She tasted the same as usual but it wasn't pleasant.

Tanya still seemed oblivious. She was clutching my body, trying to bring it closer to her and I fought to clear my mind. I thought of other things, the whore I had visited last month in one of the nice houses. She had been a pretty thing. Though not as pretty as the one I had seen two months before that. Her features hadn't been that memorable, but for some reason I remembered her now.

Tanya was still kissing my neck and her hand slid down my stomach. When her fingers closed around me I gave a quiet moan. She began stroking me and I pushed her towards the bed.

For some reason the whore had seemed beautiful, why? Then I remembered, she had had long brown hair that shone. It had hung past her shoudlers and...

I almost grit my teeth in frustration. My body was not bahaving as it should. Tanya's hands on me didn't feel bad, but I needed something else; something more or this would take all day. Then I realised the link, the long brown hair and the girl asleep in my servants quarters. I imagined her awake and laughing...then I imagined her fingers touching me. I gave a groan on Tanya's next stroke. I knew that I shouldn't be thinking about her and I wasn't sure why I was, but the image was what I needed right now.

XXX

Roslie entered the courtyard like a ship in full sail. She threw her arms around my neck with a cry of "Edward, darling." I knew that she did it in part because she loved me like a brother and partly to annoy Tanya. She embraced me for a few seconds longer than was necessary then let me go. She gave me a fond smile, "Are you losing weight Edward?" I shrugged my shoulders waiting for her next statement. "Are you not being fed properly? Something should be done, we can't have my favourite brother in law wasting away to nothing."

Tanya materialised by my side, "Well, you know men can run to fat in old age if they eat too much. Their muscle just turns soft."

I sighed, they were starting early this evening. The brittle smiles on their faces spoke to me of how long a night it was going to be. Emmett's expression mirrored mine when I caught his eye. "They only do that if they don't get encouragement. A man with a loving wife wouldn't have that problem."

"Good evening Rosalie," I said with a good natured grin, cutting her off before Tanya could retort. She was incorrigible. Even Emmett couldn't hide the grin on his face. When I saw Rosalie like this; as the mistress of all she surveyed it seemed strange to think that she had ever been desperate, that she had ever needed my help. I shook myself to clear the thoughts.

"Good evening brother," Emmett said to me, as he gave Tanya a brief kiss on the cheek. He didn't dislike my wife as much as Rosalie did. In fact sometimes I got the feeling that he felt very sorry for her; and somewhat responsible.

Tanya accepted Emmett's greeting but her eyes were fixed on Rosalie who was unwrapping her shawl to reveal a beautiful gown. It was more extravagant than was necessary for a family gathering, but it was her way. Besides, Rosalie never looked over-dressed, her own looks balanced any excesses in her clothes.

My wife was very beautiful, and she had always liked being so. But when she compared herself to Rosalie she knew that she paled. Rosalie was more beautiful than her and it was another reason that they would never be friends. However she was still a lady of dignity and when she led Emmett and Rosalie to our table she did it with grace.

As we sat down I enquired about how the boy, Jacob, was coming along. Rosalie laughed, "That's my Emmett, totally unpredictable. He told me he was just going along for the walk and then he comes back with a new slave and a promise of a new horse." Rosalie reached out and squeezed Emmett's hand. The praise was over done and deliberate, but it was obvious that she meant it. Even if she was flaunting it somewhat. "Don't ever stop being wonderful."

"I promise I wont. If you stop embarassing me about it in front of my family." Emmett's raised eyebrows spoke volumes, though the expression was softened by his smile.

Rosalie flushed and nodded, "I promise to try."

The tension in the room broke when Lauren entered followed by Alice. They were both carrying platters of food, Michael came in behind them carrying a huge tureen of soup. Alice caught Rosalie's eye, "Ah, this must be one of the girls you bought?" Clearly Emmett had been keeping his wife updated.

I nodded, "This is Alice. The other girl is still unwell."

Rosalie nodded politely to Alice and gave her a smile. She had taken to our family's way with slaves very well, more easily in fact that Tanya had. My wife still had the tendency to look down her nose at them.

"Still? I thought you were hopeful?" Emmett took a goblet of wine from Alice and gave her a smile of his own. She returned it briefly.

"I still am. Her fever has broken, it's just a matter of time. She will be well soon."

"You're a good man Edward. You always do the right thing, when you can." Tanya tensed at Rosalie's words. Though this time I could tell from Rosalie's expression that she wasn't trying to irritate my wife. She was almost thinking out loud.

"Well, in that case I should offer to serve you ladies first." I spooned up some stew, "Lauren has been hard at work in the kitchen all day." Tanya sometimes complained that although the food Lauren made was edible and even pleasant, she was not as good as the slaves some other families had.

Alice made sure that the glasses stayed full all night. She was almost obsessive about it and I realised that she had picked up on the tension between the two women. It was a gamble. Sometimes wine could lead to an escalation of bad feelings; fortunately combined with large quantities of food it just seemed to be making everyone sleepy.

There was an uncomfortable moment when Rosalie suggested that she should host Esme's birthday. Tanya was not going to allow that to happen at any cost and I was worried it might break through the veneer of civility. However Alice chose that moment to drop a plate on the floor. When I looked over I could have sworn I saw her wink at me.

Michael rushed to help her clear up the debris and the conversation shifted to who had the least competant slaves. Emmett and I spent the rest of the evening changing the subject when anything too delicate came up. It was what we did when only the four of us were in the room. Both Tanya and Rosalie behaved better when there were other witnesses.

XXX

Rosalie and Emmett were departing when Alice made a friend for life. As Tanya and I were seeing them to the door Alice rushed forward to free Rosalie's beautiful dress. It had become snagged on the door and would have torn if not for her. Rosalie thanked her profusely and, to Tanya's astonishment, even planted a kiss on her cheek. I couldn't help my smile. Rosalie had changed a lot over the years, and many times. We saw them off with embraces and promises to meet again soon.

After Emmett and Rosalie had left I decided to sit outside for a while. I liked listening to the sounds of the city and there were a few glasses of wine to be finished off. I took out a candle and my glass and took my seat at the head of the table out of habit. After I had been sitting alone for some time, Tanya came out to join me. For a moment I wondered if perhaps she would start a conversation, but that was not Tanya's style.

Evidently my earlier ardour had whetted her appetite and now she stood before me in a white nightgown. She was trying to look enticing but I couldn't muster the energy. This afternoon had been difficult anyway. "Not now Tanya, I will come to bed later."

Her smile faded for a moment but she hitched it back, "Are you sure Edward, you seemed to enjoy this afternoon."

I had, but not for the reasons she assumed, "I'm sure. I'm not ready to retire yet, and I want to be alone for a while."

Tanya didn't bother to try and change my mind. She gave me a kiss on the cheek. She was trying so hard, "Good night then."

"Good night." She turned and retreated into the house. I leant back in my chair and let my mind drift. It immediately went back to this afternoon. The images of Bella I had conjured would not leave easily. I had not meant to do it, but I couldn't stop myself.

I had imagined her cheeks flushed, her head thrown back as I made love to her. I imagined her clutching my shoudlers and begging me to continue. I imagined her warm and wet around me.

I gave a groan and got to my feet. I knew where I was going and before I could stop myself I was at the door to Alice and Bella's room. The room next to them, which had previously been Michael's stood empty. I wondered if they would continue to share a room even after Bella had recovered, it would not surprise me.

I took a deep breath to calm myself and knocked. I heard the sounds of movement within and then the door opened a crack. Alice's face relaxed into a smile and she said, "Dominus," in a polite voice.

"I thought I would check on Bella before I retired." I moved towards the bed and my heart thudded almost painfully. Her cheeks were stained with pink, just as I had imagined them being. It did not help my self-control. I took the opportunity to lean forward and touch my fingers to her face. Her skin felt hotter than ever under my skin, but I knew it was because my own hands were cold.

Bella felt the chill too, she whimpered quietly and pressed her face against my hand. While I was still fighting to control my reaction to her movement I was surprised all over again. Bella opened her eyes slowly and they met mine. Her eyes were dark brown and seemed incredibly deep. I found that I couldn't do anything, I couldn't speak or move my hand away. I was lost in Bella's stare.

I saw her face breaking into a smile and I gave her one of my own. But her smile faltered before it became complete. She seemed to realise where she was in that instant, or rather where she wasn't, and her body tensed, "Alice," I said quietly.

The imp was by my side in a second, her delight at her friend's awakening was palpable, "Oh Bella, how are you feeling?" Bella looked incredibly relieved to see her friend. I was watching every nuance of her expression, I couldn't tear my eyes away.

Bella opened her mouth to speak but her voice just rasped, "Do you have any water in here Alice?"

"Oh, yes." Alice rushed to the little table in the corner of the room and poured Bella some water. She was back at my side in an instant, helping her friend to take a sip.

Bella struggled to sit up and I put a hand on her shoudler. As I did I felt an odd frisson that shot up my whole arm. Her eyes fixed me, "You should stay still Bella. You've been unwell, but you are improving now I think."

"Where...How long...Who are you?" I didn't blame her for her confusion. She had been too tightly in the grip of the fever to notice her relocation. Now she was probably confused as to why there was a strange man staring at her.

Alice knelt by her bed and took her hand, "A lot has been happening."

I knew that my behaviour would soon become too noticeable to be dismissed and I took the opportunity to get out of the room. I didn't want to embarrass myself. "I will leave it to Alice to explain everything."

I gave a bow and left the room shutting the door behind me. I managed to get a few feet before I had to pause to gather my wits. I had a feeling that my thoughts of Bella were not going to get easier to control now.

XXX

A week after Bella left her sick bed found Emmett at my home with two of my friends from the army, Jasper and Tyler. We were adding a door to connect two of the servants' rooms. I had commented on the fact that Bella and Alice continued to share a room and invited them to make use of the other. Alice explained that she and Bella had not been separated at night for a long time and did not relish the prospect.

I considered purchasing a new, larger bed for them to share, but this idea seemed better. They could each have their own room, but keep the door open while they slept if they wished. When I had put my suggestion to them Alice had been delighted. Bella had begged me not to go to any trouble or expense but I waved her concerns away. She had reacted similarly when I had returned from the market with new dresses for them all...both times. Lauren and Alice had simply been excited and grateful.

Bella did not speak directly to me often and when she did she seemed almost painfully shy. But I looked forward to hearing the sound of her voice whenever she did. The difference between the two girls could not have been more extreme, but it only seemed to add to their closeness. They were a perfect balance.

"Are you asleep over there Edward?" I felt something jab my ribs as my friend Jasper spoke. Emmett and I had known Jasper since we were children. He and I had served in the same legion for many years, though now he and Tyler had just returned from a journey I had not been a part of. They seemed set to be in the legion for life.

"No, just lost in thought. Emmett, could you pass me that board?" My brother looked up and did as I asked. He was deep in concentration, as he always was when he was working. Anyone who had known Emmett when he was with the legion would not have believed he could be so devoted to any other profession. He had been like Jasper and Tyler and I. His marriage to Rosalie had changed him irrevocably. It felt strange to think that it had happened almost five years ago and he had never looked back.

I had never understood it before. I tended to find that when I spent long periods of time at home I grew restless. I was accustomed to activity and being home limited the possibilities. It was these fits of listlessness that prompted me to return to the army. I was always busy then. The soldiers were always being injured of course, but even when we weren't in direct conflict things still seemed to happen. The men grew bored and there was a lot of rough housing.

Now though I wasn't feeling the usual boredom, and I no longer fought to deny the reason. I was quenching my thirst for excitement in other ways. Imaginary but no less vivid ways.

Bella had insisted on getting out of bed for the first time two days after she had awakened. I had suggested that she take more time to recover but she insisted gently that she was fine. I got the impression that she felt idle and wanted to begin earning her keep. It was with some difficulty that I persuded her to rest as long as I had.

Now though I wished that I had been firmer. Her constant presence was thrilling but unsettling. Her eyes startled me whenever I saw her whether she was looking directly at me or not. Even when I saw her from behind I discovered it was easy for me to become distracted by her. Her slender figure as she moved always caught my eye, and her hair glinting in the sunlight was enough to throw my concentration.

Alice had become even chirpier since her friend was obviously so nearly recovered and their laughter echoed through the house regularly. It was a simple kind of joy that lifed my spirits whenever I heard it.

Bella seemed to be in a position to take over the kitchen as soon as Lauren would relinquish it. She clearly had a flare for cooking and when she had offered to prepare dinner for the first time Lauren had been happy to allow her to do so. I suspected that Lauren had not anticipated Bella being as proficient as she was and it had irked her.

As I was wondering whether I should strategically give Lauren another 'important' job, I saw Bella through the window. She walked across the courtyard toward the house. She was carrying hot water up to Tanya. I was so distracted that I lost concentration and dropped the board on my foot. The pain shot up to my knee and I gave a yell of agony. The board crashed to the ground as I began hopping on my good foot, laughter errupting around me.

It was a stupid pain but it was blinding none the less. I was about to tell all the men to go hell when I felt a pair of hands steady me. They felt small but were surprisingly strong. I looked down and saw dark brown eyes staring into mine. Bella was holding me tightly, "I can see to that Dominus."

The pain receded to an ache as I felt Bella's hands on my arms and I automatically allowed her to lead me out of the servant's quarters to the kitchen. I limped only a little and I didn't care about the pain. Bella pointed to a bench and I sat down. She disappeared outside for a moment and returned carrying a pail of water. I suddenly managed to find my voice, my inability to speak around her was becoming tiresome, "Thank you Bella, that was embarassing."

"You're welcome Dominus," her voice was quiet and humble and it irritated me. I knew it was completely irrational, and I wasn't exactly irritated with her. I wanted her to look me in the eye, I wanted her to feel comfortable enough to speak to me. She collected some small pieces of cloth from the shelf and then came to stand in front of me. My breath hitched in my throat. Her scent wafted towards me and I could see the slope of her breasts, they were level with my face.

Bella knelt down in front of me and dropped the rags in the water. She took off my shoe gently her fingers brushing my ankle. As I watched her work quickly, I began to feel concerned. This was the first time I had been alone with her when we could have a conversation. If she kept being so efficient it would be over soon. I jumped when she pressed the cold rags to the painful part of my foot and she instantly apologised.

"You're new dress is very pretty," I said. I knew women liked attention to things like that and she did look beautiful in blue. Tanya had not been especially pleased with our slaves new apparrel. Then I had argued that well-dressed slaves showed our wealth and she raised no more objections.

"Thank you Dominus. Alice picked it out for me this morning." I tried to think of another dress-related question to ask her but I couldn't think of any. Intead I switched topic.

"Are you having fun planning the party?" I asked her. It was a stupid question and I felt like a fool but it was the first thing that came to mind. Apparently my mind was not going to be of any help, my body was firmly in control at the moment. Bella's breasts had distracted it. The very breasts that I could now see even more of. I had a bird's eye view down her dress and I was finding it impossible not to stare. Bella didn't seem to notice.

She was nodding as she squeezed the water from the rags, "We hope everyone will enjoy it." Her answer was all politeness. I had to do something to help her relax. I knew her reserve could be a good thing, it would keep a distance between us but I couldn't stand it.

"Is Tanya being unbearable?" I asked her lightly, trying to force a joke.

Bella looked up for a second in surprise but dropped her eyes again quickly, "N...no Dominus. We are all busy and Domina is working very hard." I knew that wasn't true, Tanya liked delegating and to be fair she was good at it. She probably hadn't lifted a finger during the whole process.

"Bella, it's allright to tell the truth you know. I won't be angry with you." I leant towards her, I wanted to see her eyes, damn it.

"I..."

"Bella, look at me." She raised her eyes slowly and I had to fight to concentrate, "I know you're trying to be polite and I appreciate it. But I would prefer it if you were more relaxed, more...yourself."

Bella looked confused, she frowned slightly and a small crease appeared between her eyebrows. I had an almost overwhelming urge to reach out and smooth it away. I was just congratulating myself on ignoring it when I realised my hand was moving towards her face. Bella's confusion grew as she watched it and I decided that it would look as foolish to pull my hand back as it would to continue. Besides, she was stil frowning.

When my fingers touched her forehead, her cheeks flushed instantly. Her eyes locked with mine and I stroked a finger over the crease. Her breathing changed and I could tell that Bella's heart was beating faster. Her breasts were heaving against her dress as she stared at me. The crease disappeared but I didn't take my hand away, instead it seemed to drift to her cheek without my telling it to.

I was trying to think of something to say but again I was struck dumb. Bella seemed to be having the same trouble although she couldn't tear her eyes away anymore than I could. I stroked my thumb over her cheek bone and her lips parted as her breath hitched.

Knelt at my feet, she was only a few inches away from me. I could lean down and press my lips to hers and I had a feeling she wouldn't try to stop me. More than that, I thought she might even want me to. "Bella..." Her name slipped out, I didn't know what I was going to say. Perhaps I would have asked her permission, but I was saved the trouble. I heard another crash and guffawing laughter from the servants quarters.

Bella jumped as though she had been scalded and scambled to her feet, "Will there be anything else Dominus?" She asked, her eyes down again, her voice subservient.

I was furious. Why hadn't I thrown caution to the wind and just kissed her? Then I remembered, my closest friend and my brother were only a room away. As was my wife. "No, thank you Bella."

She nodded, picked up the water and scurried from the room.

XXX

Once the door was hung and the light was failing, the men settled around our outdoor table. Michael lit the torches to combat the darkness, still not meeting my eyes. Bella and Alice appeared as if from nowhere to serve us all a delicious dinner of stew and potatoes. It was simple but truly excellent and we all ate enthusiastically. Tanya never got involved on these occaisions.

There was a lot of talking and laughing as there always was when we got together. Jasper held court telling stories about our time with the army. Emmett and I had known him before we had enlisted, we had played together with Rosalie as children. His family, the Hales, had been decimated by a fever when he was only young. We had been told later that Jasper had caught the disease too but for some reason he had survived it. His resulting wealth and property had prompted my Uncle Caius to take him in. The Volturi family liked to be close to the right people and were more forward thinking than most. They correctly surmised that Jasper wouldn't be a boy forever and once he was able to run his own finances they wanted to ensure they were on his good side.

Jasper hadn't really lived up to their expectations. Althought proficient at business, his only desire had been to join the army with Emmett and I. Though not all of the patriarch's efforts had been for nought. He remained close to our family and when it became clear that he would not want to manage his own affairs he had placed them with perfect trust into the hands of my father. Carlisle had made wise investments for Jasper and kept his farms outside the city running well. He appointed overseers and kept the slaves and workers happy. Jasper repaid my father by giving him a percentage of his profits. He had offered an equal share but of course Carlisle had refused. So it was always a feeling of family when Jasper was with us and I usually enjoyed listening to him when he reminisced but I had other things on my mind.

After I had returned to the servants' quarters to help I had not been of much use. A couple of times I had noticed Emmett watching me. I sincerely hoped he was not going to be even more observant than usual. I didn't want to talk about whatever was happening to me. I didn't even want to think about it too much.

Fortunately he didn't say anything to me, either in private or in front of the others. Normally he would call me out and they would all laugh, but this time he didn't and I was grateful.

Now he was concentrating on Jasper and laughing with the others. I took the opportunity to chance a look at Bella. She was stood near the kitchens waiting to see if anyone would need anything. But she was looking straight at me. As our eyes met her cheeks coloured and she dropped her eyes to the ground.

My breathing was shallow as I counted to ten in my head. On seven she looked up again and when she found that I was still watching her she reached up to fiddle with her hair. I was just realising how content I would be to stare at her forever when Jasper interrupted me, "Edward?"

I blinked and tried to focus on the conversation, "Sorry, I drifted off. What were you saying?"

"I was saying that the god's smiled on you at the market. Two beautiful girls who cook. Lucky man." He looked over to where Alice stood. I hadn't actually noticed her, she was stood behind me keeping watch on my half of the table. I turned and gave her a smile which she returned but I couldn't help but notice that it seemed tense.

I was wondering what was bothering her when I noticed Jasper's expression. The way he was looking at her was almost indecent. "Indeed," I said sharply. Jasper broke off his staring, "They are both good hard workers."

"Hmmm..." he said and went back to looking at Alice.

"Jasper!"

"What?" I suddenly became aware that Jasper had drunk a little too much and I softened my tone. He was my best friend after all and he hardly ever got drunk. "It's time to break up this gathering." I turned to my brother, "Can you make sure he gets home?" I asked Emmett quiety.

Emmett nodded and grinned, "Shall I set him straight?"

"Gently, if you would." I had heard him say much worse things during our time together surrounded by nothing other than men. As a group, our sex grew more and more coarse the longer we were out of female company. He wasn't to know how irrationally protective I was over these girls.

Tyler was holding Jasper up with one arm. He was built similarly to Emmett and had no trouble supporting my friend. I wished them all good night and sent them on their way. As fond as I was of them, I longed for quiet. My day had been more stressful than I would have guessed. I closed the door behind my guests and turned to see Bella bent over the table.

I let out a silent gasp and froze. I could see her stretched out on that table. I could lift her skirts and touch her skin. I could kiss her and tell her how much I had been thinking of her. I was wondering how far I might take this fantasy, when Alice came into my line of sight and the spell was broken.

She and Bella were simply clearing the table of the debris from our meal. The torches threw odd shadows around and I pictured Bella and Alice dancing around a fire. Then suddenly Bella was alone and dancing naked. Almost as though she had heard my thoughts, Bella glanced briefly over her shoulder at me. She had timed it carefully. Alice had just dissappeard into the kitchen with an armful of things to wash.

I took the glance as an invitation and walked towards her. It would be best if I were to ignore the moment we had shared in the kitchen. It would be best if I could pretend we hadn't been looking for each other all evening, but I couldn't bring myself to do it. Just seeing her set my heart racing. This little dance we had been doing all day was even more thrilling and it was a thrill I had never felt before.

I was not used to denying myself things I wanted, and I had never wanted anything like I wanted her. When I reached the table Bella had just straightened up, she had plates in her hand but she was frozen. She knew I was there and she didn't seem uncomfortable.

She didn't move. She stood holding the plates and waited. I wished I could read her mind. I wanted to reach out and touch her. If I could just touch her hand for a second, perhaps this craving would ease. But I didn't know if she wanted me to.

Suddenly I didn't care. I reached around her and guided her hand back to the table. She put the plates gently back down. I knew that I only had a few seconds before Alice interrupted us. I tugged her hand gently and she turned around. Her lips were parted and she was breathing heavily.

I thought about asking her permission, but she might say no. If she did it might kill me. Instead I reached up to touch her cheek. Bella shivered and her eyes drifted shut when my fingers brushed her cheekbone as they had this afternoon.

Seeing her response was enough. Whether she would admit it or not, Bella wanted me to kiss her. My other arm snaked around her waist quickly and her eyes flew open. I hesitated for a second and promised myself that if she pulled away I wouldn't stop her. She didn't. So I tipped her face to mine and gently pressed my lips to hers.

Bella let out a quiet moan as my arms clutched her tighter. She felt so warm against my body. She felt so good. I could feel my body responding to her. I wanted her more than I had ever wanted a woman before. Even when I was younger and less in control of my body I had never craved intimacy like this before. I didn't just want to bed a woman. I wanted her, Bella. Warm and wet and willing beneath me. My tongue brushed against her lip...

"Edward!"

Tanya's voice cut through my thoughts like a knife. Bella jerked away from me horrified and we both looked around. My wife was no where to be seen. Bella reached for the abandoned plates and began to clear the table again just as Tanya appeared on the balcony above us.

"There you are. Are you coming in soon?"

"Yes," I said and even I could hear how strangled my voice sounded. I cleared my throat and tried again. "I'll be in, in a moment."

Tanya nodded and retreated back into our bedroom. I wanted to say something to Bella. I wasn't sure what, I just felt that I should tell her that I didn't normally do this. But Alice had come out of the kitchen. Time had seemed to stand still for me but in reality it had only been a few moments.

Bella was not meeting my eye, she was concentrating too hard on her task. I would not get the chance to speak to her tonight. "Good night girls," I said as I made my way into the house.

"Good night Dominus," they chanted back at me.

Michael was waiting to turn down the lights when I came into the room. I had never minded changing in front of my slaves before, I had done it for years. Though recently I had taken to ordering him out of my room whenever I found him there. I might be distracted but I didn't want Michael near Tanya. However I felt about our relationship, I didn't want him leering over her any more than I wanted him leering over Bella and Alice.

I dismissed him and got into bed. Tanya instantly rolled over and stroked a hand over my chest. I felt my whole body tense under her touch and I felt horribly guilty all over again. I should be able to stand her touch at least. Tanya seemed to take my reaction as excitement however and her hand moved down.

Her fingers encircled me and she gasped, "Well, I guess you're ready enough husband."

I had almost forgotten about that. I still hadn't managed to calm down after my encounter with Bella. Tanya was stroking me and although it wasn't the touch I wanted I couldn't deny that any relief was welcome.

I couldn't hardly pretend that I wasn't in the mood anyway. She had proof of how in the mood I was. I reached for her, but she just smiled and moved down my body. I thanked the gods when I felt her mouth close over me. As terrible as it made me feel, I was grateful that I didn't need to look at her. It meant that I could think of Bella.

XXX

Tanya lay on my chest dosing quietly. I had made sure it was good for her too of course. Even when I visited the brothels I never left a woman unsatisfied. It was the epitome of rudeness. I had hoped for sleep afterwards but so far it eluded me. I couldn't even relax. I couldn't stop thinking about Bella.

I had only wanted to talk her her; to try and ease the tension between us so she could feel more comfortable around me. Instead I knew I had just done something bad. Now I had a different kind of tension to deal with. I was sure now that Bella did in fact like me. It was easy to keep my distance when I thought she would see me as one of all the other men that had taken advantage of her and Alice. I didn't want to be one of them.

But if she wanted me...I felt as though it changed everything. I wouldn't force myself on an unwilling woman ever. But a woman who wanted me too was a different thing entirely. Only the possibility that Alice and Bella might have left their new adjoining door open stopped me from going down there. I rolled Tanya off me gently and settled down for a restless night's sleep.

XXX


	3. Chapter 3

**A/N: Thanks to weekitty and x123 who reviewed my second chapter and made me want to update. I don't really require a certain number to update. As long as someone's reading I'll keep writing, but it's always awesome to get some feedback**

**I always reply, so feel free to dop me a line.**

XXX

Chapter Three

When I left the next morning to call on my patients I hadn't had the chance to speak to Bella. I had barely slept thinking about the way her lips felt against mine and I knew something had to be done. I had to get myself in hand. Just before dawn I had come to a realisation. No matter how much I wanted to be better than the men who had come before me, I was behaving the same way.

I had come dangerously close to convincing myself that I could get away with it, that it would be all right and that no one would get hurt. The same lies I knew other men had tried to tell themselves. I was a married man and I could offer her nothing.

I knew I was developing feelings for the strange, shy slave I had bought, feelings I couldn't claim if I took advantage of her. I needed to get back in control. Then there was Tanya.

My poor beautiful Tanya. She should have had suitors clamouring for her smallest smile and she had had many in the past. But she had not had any choice in her eventual husband, my second cousin Peter. His mother and father, my great uncle Marcus and great aunt Didyme had pressed for the match. Tanya had not been able to settle on any one in particular and so her parents had chosen for her.

Although it was a good match for Peter financially he had opposed it, but had refused to give his reasons. In light of this stubborness his parents insisted and the two were married. He had been refusing to marry for some time and they were at the end of their patience. I had known it was doomed from the beginning because Emmett and I, and Peter's brother Liam, knew his reasons. Reasons which we feared would soon become known to everyone.

As soon as he was married to Tanya he became careless about concealing his affair with one of the Tavern women. Her name was Charlotte and whenever he fought with his new wife he would run to his lover. Peter confessed to me one night after too much wine that he couldn't love his wife and that he had prayed to the gods for help but none came. All he loved, all he cared about was Charlotte.

I had given the matter some thought but had not been able to help him. There is little help that can be given in such situations. I just had to hope that Tanya would be tolerant of Peter's daliance, but given what I knew of her it seemed a weak hope. She had a reputation for independence and occasional bouts of hysteria when she didn't get her way. No matter how little feeling she had for Peter I couldn't imagine her being content in the knowledge that he preferred another woman.

I waited gloomily for the matter to come to a climax, but it never did. Peter and I left Rome with the legion and were gone for several months. It was the last battle we all fought together. Emmett and Liam didn't come away again and Peter never returned home. Peter survived the fighting and was anxiously looking forward to our return when he took sick.

It wasn't uncommon. Many of us lived in tight quarters and disease could spread rapidly. His was not the first case that I saw. His brother Liam caught the illness as well but he recovered. Peter didn't. We were three days from Rome when I called Liam, Jasper and Emmett into the caravan to say good bye to him. He never regained sufficient consciousness to know we were there, but we all heard him mumble his lover's name in his final delerium.

The worst part of our return was having to tell great uncle Marcus and great aunt Didyme. My aunt was never quite the same again and Liam left the legion afterwards. He claimed it was because there were too many memories of his brother and I could understand that. Though I suspected he also knew that his mother would not survive the loss of another son. My mother took his loss hard too. She had spent much of her childhood mothering the little boy, pretending he was hers.

The only good thing I could see emerging from the loss of Peter was that the family would never find out about his indiscretion. I didn't meet Charlotte but Jasper went to see her. He later told me that she had left Rome and there was no indication she would ever return. It was probably for the best. I hoped that now Tanya would be able to find a husband who loved her and be happy. I had learned enough from my parents to understand the benefits of a partner you loved.

But that didn't happen. Tanya's parents had been set on a union with our family and it had been achieved. The Volturi family and its offshoots were considered to be climbing the social and financial ladder, a good investment in other words. We had the breeding and the resourses to do well. Since Tanya had been married into our family she was our responsibility. The first I heard of the matter was when Liam called in to see my brother.

He looked terrible. His hair was stuck up in all directions, his tunic was not correctly tied and he was pacing the floor. Emmett was clenching his huge hands into fists and releasing them again and again.

They had not wanted to tell me the problem but I had insisted. It had been suggested that Liam should divorce his wife Siobhan and marry Tanya to maintain the family's alliance. His marriage to Siobhan had been a love match and it had only been allowed reluctantly in the first place. But Liam was devoted to his wife and was desperate. Tanya's parents, the Denali's were not to be underestimated and they were very insistent. Our family could not afford to have them an enemies.

He had come to ask if Emmett would be willing to marry Tanya and I could see that my brother was thinking about it. We had always been close to Liam and Peter and now we felt even more protective of Liam. Emmett wanted to help him but I didn't see how he could.

He and Rosalie had been in love for as long as I could remember. How could he marry another woman? The fact was however, Liam was already married and they had a daughter. They were a loving family. How could Emmett let them be separated? How could I?

It turned out that I couldn't let either of them make that kind of sacrifice. I was the last man. Uncle Caius had only daughters, and his one grandson was barely twelve. It might have been managed despite his age, with caveats in place for a while, but Tanya was not young enough to wait for him to become a man. My grandfather, Aro, had only had one daughter, my mother Esme.

I was the only one left who was neither married nor in love. It seemed only fair that I be the one to marry Tanya. My doing so would mean that a lot of other people could be happy. At the time it hadn't seemed like much of a sacrifice. I was twenty and it was expected that I would get married. I could see no reason why my wife shouldn't be Tanya even if she was a little older than me.

So we had been married and I had had no regrets. Emmett and Rosalie had married soon after. They had not wanted to risk being easily parted in the future and I was happier on that day than at my own wedding. I had even been the one to present Rosalie for marriage as she no longer had any close relations.

Rosalie and I had always been close. Our shared history bound us together with Jasper and Emmett and we had all always loved each other. But after I had married Tanya she had become devoted to me. I was second only to Emmett. I was the reason she had Emmett and she seemed to think the only way to thank me was never to forget it.

In turn she despised Tanya. She had once told me that she felt that she had stopped me finding a wife I loved like she loved Emmett. I had hushed her of course. I had sincerely told her that I was glad of my actions. Now a small selfish part of me was sorry...because of Bella. If I had been unmarried things could be different.

I knew the match would have been met with disapproval. I had a certain status in Rome and marrying freed slaves always raised eyebrows. It was always so obviously a love match and to some it implied weakness. I wouldn't have cared, I knew it. I didn't know where these feelings had come from, or exactly what they were but they were strong. I would have freed her and married her. The scandal would have died down in time and it would have been accepted.

What was there to be done now? If I was to divorce Tanya in favour of a freed slave there would be consequences. If they would just be to myself I would accept them but they would not be. The Denali's would be furious and my whole family would answer for my actions.

If I refused Tanya someone else would be forced to take her. No matter how I tried I couldn't justify breaking up someone's family. It couldn't be right.

XXX

After I had eaten lunch at home I gathered my courage. "Bella, I would like you to accompany me to the market. I want to aquaint you with the place."

Bella looked surprised and I was horrified to see her blush deeply. If she kept doing that she was going to arouse suspicions. "Yes, Dominus."

"Alice, I will take you tomorrow." Alice nodded happily. She was scrubbing the stone floor of the courtyard with enthusiasm. But common agreement she stayed away from food as much as possible. It just didn't seem to agree with her. "I don't ever want you to go alone, only in pairs. Lauren knows the rules. If there's ever any trouble nearby you immediately leave, never separate. She will tell you the rest."

I got up from the table and Bella immediately came to my side. Her eyes were on the ground but I could see her chest heaving slightly again. I didn't trust myself to speak to her, I just walked to the stable where Michael had my favourite horse, Seth waiting. Then I almost stopped. I hadn't thought this through very well. Either Bella was going to have to sit in front of me or behind me.

It barely took me half a second to decide that having her ride in front of me was not an option. It could become embarassing very quickly. I collected a bag I had packed and hung it on Seth's saddle.

Once I was settled, Michael helped Bella up behind me. Perhaps he felt my eyes on him or perhaps he had truly learnt his lesson, either way he didn't touch her for a second longer than he had to. Bella wriggled for a moment and then wrapped her arms around my waist. I gasped, perhaps I hadn't thought this through all the way. The heat from her body was soaking through my clothing and making me very aware that she was pressed against me.

I fought to remember what I was supposed to be doing. I clicked at Seth and guided him out fo the courtyard and into the street. I was pleased to see it was not too busy and I took the most direct route to the market. Bella did not speak, but I thought she was holding on to me a little tighter than was necessary. It thrilled me and frustrated me at the same time. She was not going to make this easy.

When we neared the market I cleared my throat, "Bella?"

"Hmm...Yes Dominus?" I felt a small movement on my back. With a jolt I realised that she had been resting her face on me.

"In the bag on the saddle, there is some black cloth. I would like you to cover your face and hair please." My voice didn't sound anything like it did usually and I was almost embarassed.

"Y...Yes Dominus." Bella sounded confused but she did as she was told. I heard her pulling the cloth out of the bag. I used it to cover Seth's head when the streets were busy. Horses could be easily startled in Rome.

I got down off Seth and handed him to one of the men, "Good day citizen. Don't bury him at the back. This won't take long."

When I turned back to Seth, Bella was looking down at the ground with some apprenhension from under her scarf. Swallowing nervously I moved in front of her and held up my arms. I couldn't see her expression under her improvised veil but I could hear her breathing. She sounded out of breath, it was similar to how I felt.

Then suddenly she was in my arms and it was truly hard to breath. It was only for a second, and she stepped away as soon as her feet were on the ground but it was almost enough to unman me. Instead I remembered where I was and simply said, "Come."

She followed close behind me as I led her down one of the alleys. We were moving away from the market and into a less respectable area. My feet knew the way well. I had been visiting this brothel since I was thirteen and I had become a man. Bella gasped when she realised where we were, "Just keep your face covered," I said quietly. "No harm will come to you with me. I promise." I meant it. If anyone tried to lay a hand on Bella I would kill them where they stood.

The man who ran the place came up to me and clasped my hand. Once he realised it was me he greeted me like I was an old friend. I supposed that in a way we were. It was embarassing in front of Bella, but I tried to take it stoically. I told myself I had nothing to be ashamed of but it didn't feel true. "I just need a room for an hour Eric."

Eric didn't say anything and he didn't notice Bella. Like most of the men who ran successful brothels Eric was blind. He was employed and paid well precisely because he couldn't see who came and left with who. Blindfolded men stood in strategic places around the room. If there was a suggestion of trouble they would remove their blindfolds and deal with it. They were big and threatening enough to prevent most trouble with their simple presence.

Eric told me to make use of any of the rooms on the left except the first. I thanked him and placed a hand on Bella's back. She allowed me to lead her up the stairs and into the furthest room away from the others. I did not want to be overheard.

Once I had shut the door behind us, Bella lowered the cloth slowly, she looked around the room she was in and blushed. There was little furniture, only a bed, a table and a chair. There was basin of water for washing and a jug of water with a cup for drinking. The windows were shuttered and the only light was from the low lamps. Suddenly, I wasn't sure if this was a good idea. I had connocted this scheme in order to be sure of privacy but looking at her face I misgave. She had gone white.

I went to stand in front on her but she didn't look at me. After several seconds I lifted her chin gently, "Bella, are you well?"

She nodded nervously, "I...I thought we were going to the market. I wasn't expecting..." she held out her hand towards the bed, "...this. If you could just give me a moment to prepare..."

At first her words didn't make any sense. Then when they did I realised my own stupid error. What else was she supposed to think? I had brought her to a brothel and asked for a room. I was the biggest fool ever to live. I remembered Alice assuming the same thing in similar circumstances and I cursed myself to Dis. "No Bella. I am sorry. I didn't bring you here to have you. I just wanted to speak to you without the risk of being interrupted."

Bella was frowning and the crease between her eyes had reappeared, "So...you don't want to have me then Dominus?"

"No...yes..." I stopped trying to speak and took a deep breath. I needed to stay calm if I was to remembered why I was here, and I was not here to stare at that bed. "Bella, I wanted to try and explain my actions last night."

"There is no need to explain anything Dominus." The polite tone in her voice was irritating me, I wanted her to speak to me as her. I wanted to know her. Except that I was here to tell her the opposite...here in a room where we would not be disturbed for an hour.

I suddenly felt very weary and I think it showed in my voice, "I want to try. I feel as though I should."

She must have picked up on my frustration because she didn't argue anymore. Instead she fixed me with her brown eyes, "As you wish."

"Ummm..." Was my brilliant reponse. Whenever she looked at me like that I had a tendency to go catatonic. "It was wrong of me to do what I did." I finally managed to say.

The crease was back, "Wrong?"

"Yes, I shouldn't have forced myself on you like that." I felt as though I was getting some of my purpose back. These were the things I had been intending to say after all. Unfortunately Bella seemed intent on contradicting me, quietly yet forcefully.

"You didn't force yourself on me Dominus." She was still looking at me. It was the longest I had known her to do so. She had normally gone back to staring at the floor by now.

"Well, I know that I didn't hurt you, but I still took advantage of you." I was proud of the fact that I managed to get a sentence out. Again Bella looked confused, then for the first time, I saw a little mettle.

"If I may say so, I don't agree." Her words were polite but her tone was hard. "Dominus," she added. Her cheeks flushed a deeper red but this time I thought it might be from anger. I found that it was incredibly erotic to see her like this. The calm facade she always showed was slipping.

"You don't agree?" I asked. I just wanted her to keep talking.

"No..." then she looked about her and she blinked, "But if you say it was wrong, then I accept that it was so." She didn't look away but she did bite her lip nervously. I was struck by an overpowering urge to do the same thing.

I had taken a step towards her before I was able to stop myself. I clenched my hands into fists and gritted my teeth. I was trying to think of something to say when Bella took a step towards me. She took only one and then stopped, mimicking me. She was only a few paces away now. I could see her hair shining in the candle lit room.

My carefully constucted speech had flown from me now. I couldn't think clearly. My mind had deserted me; it had left me at the mercy of my body again. My body which was screaming at me to touch her. To stroke her hair, kiss her lips, anything.

I took another step forwards, "I don't believe men should interefere with their slaves and it is a rule I have never broken."

"Why?" She asked quietly.

"Because I don't think it is right to take something from someone unwillingly."

"No, I meant why are you breaking your rule? Now?" She took another step forwards and I was amazed at how calm she was. At least I was until I saw her chest heaving again. She was not as calm as she appeared; and now she was inches away from me.

I tried to focus on giving her an answer; a sensible answer. Instead I just stared at her until the truth broke free. I couldn't tell her lies apparently. "Because you have bewitched me Bella. Even before you woke, I thought of you. I hope you will believe me when I say that it has never happened to me before. I truly haven't..."

"I do believe you." Bella said. She was staring up at me, her eyes wide with sincerity.

"Oh...why?" I was surprised at her easy acceptance.

"Because Alice offered herself to you and you refused, kindly. She is a beautiful girl."

My breath shuddered as I let it out. It seemed important that she believed me, "She is not as beautiful as you are." I reached out to take her hand in mine. It was not a good thing to do. I felt a tingle spread up my arm and my eyes unwillingly flicked to the bed. "You, Bella, are the most beautiful thing I have even seen." I seemed to be embroiled in a personal battle. I couldn't not think of last night; the way she had tasted, the scent of her skin... I had this room for an hour. I had enough sense to realise I was dangerously close to crossing the line into unacceptable again. "Bella, I think we should leave now."

"As you say, Dominus," she whispered. But she didn't move away. She seemed to be waiting for me to do so, and I couldn't. Her small hand was in mine and I didn't know how to pull it loose. I was trapped here, with her and I had never felt happier.

I tugged on her hand gently and she came forward and raised her chin in invitation. I gave a groan as I pushed all the doubts aside and pulled her to me. When her lips met mine she sighed into the kiss and her arms went up to my shoulders.

Today there was no one to call my name and interrupt us. When I stroked my tongue against her bottom lip, Bella let me in immediately. Her hands were holding me tighter, she was clutching at my arms and I knew I truly had forced her to nothing. That was no longer an excuse I could claim. Bella wanted to be in my arms. The same place as I wanted her to be.

Neither of us should want it but we both did. The kiss deepened as I pulled Bella closer, my body was responding to her and I knew she must be able to feel me pressed against her. She didn't seem to mind. Her hands slid up into my hair and she tangled her fingers there. I kept trying to pull her closer and I almost lifted her off her feet.

Bella was kissing me desperately. She was everywhere, all over me; I was drowning in her. Eventually I was gasping for breath. My hands cupped her face and I pulled away from her. Her eyes opened sleepily, she was flushed and it travelled all the way down to her breasts. Her lips were swollen from my kiss; she had never looked more beautiful. Her hands were still clutching my shoulders.

"Bella," I groaned, "I must stop this now."

She gave a shuddering breath, "As you say Dominus," she repeated. But her hands didn't let me go. Mine didn't leave her either. Instead I sighed and kissed her again. More gently this time. When I broke away I tucked her head under my chin.

"I don't know how to stay away from you, Bella." I stroked her hair gently. "I spend my time at home looking for you and I can't stop." It worried me, how long before someone would notice? Alice or Tanya for instance.

"I'm sorry," Her voice was muffled.

I pulled her back to look at me, "This is not your fault Bella. Truly. It is mine. It was my mistake. I should never have touched you, it is my fault."

To my dismay her eyes filled with tears, "As you say, Dominus." She stepped away from me and her eyes dropped to the floor again. I couldn't bear the idea of her blaming herself for my mistake.

It seemed very important that she understand, but I hated to risk upsetting her more. "Bella, no...I mean it..."

"Can we go now? Please?" She spoke in a whisper and began wrapping the cloth around her again. She had withdrawn from me and I felt as though the air in the room had turned cold.

"Bella..."

"Please, Dominus." She was biting her lip again. She looked horribly uncomfortable and I couldn't bring myself to answer. Instead I walked past her and opened the door. She took her place a short way behind me and followed me down the stairs.

I thanked Eric as I passed and dropped a few coins on his table. He wished me a good day with a leering smile. I found it hard not to knock the smile off his face. I wasn't sure if I was angry that he thought as he did or if I was angry that it wasn't true.

I showed Bella quickly around the market and then took her home. She barely spoke to me unless I asked her a direct question. This afternoon had not gone as I had planned it at all. Instead of freeing Bella of any responsibility and assuring her it would not happen again, I had lost my own argument. I had been unable to stop myself from kissing her and making everything worse.

When we reached home I helped Bella down from Seth. She nodded to me, "Will that be all Dominus?" She asked.

I swallowed hard. "Yes, Bella. That's all."

She nodded and turned away from me. I wanted to stop her and take it all back, but I didn't. I was trying to be a good man, a good citizen and a good husband. As I watched Bella walk away I knew it was going to be difficult.

XXX

The days leading up to the party were not easy. Tanya was getting steadily more and more hysterical as it grew closer. There were people moving in and out of the house constantly. What began as a small party for family had turned into something more extravagant. Hangings had appeared on the walls. Every piece of furniture gleamed. There were delicious smells wafting out of the kitchen all the time. I couldn't help but picture Bella cooking whenever I passed by but I didn't venture inside.

The whole thing seemed to be getting out of control as far as I was concerned but I had more sense than to try and interfere. I did my best to stay out of the way. However since I was also trying to avoid Bella's company I found myself spending more and more time out of the house, either with Jasper or Emmett or both.

I managed to avoid crossing swords with Tanya until the morning of the party. I was getting ready to leave. I wanted to see my patients as early as possible so that I could be back in good time. I was sure that there were things that would need doing.

I was about to mount up when I heard Tanya screaming in the kitchen. Michael paused handing me the reins in surprise. I couldn't make out what was going on so I left Michael waiting and went to investigate. As I got closer I could make out the words, "You incompetant little slut!" I heard the sound of a slap and rushed forward.

The door stood open and I could see Tanya immediately. "I should whip you..."

For a moment I froze, Bella was stood in front of her. She had one hand on her face, where there was a red mark. "I'm sorry Domina."

"Sorry?" Tanya raised her hand to slap Bella again and I moved towards her. I grabbed her arm, perhaps a little tighter than I meant to. Tanya span to see who had touched her, fury etched into every line of her face. When she saw it was me she stopped and gave a small whimper of pain.

I released my hold on her arm and glared at her, "What is going on in here? I don't like screaming in my house."

Tanya pointed imperiously at Bella, "This little slut, this litt..."

"Tanya, you will kindly desist with the name-calling. It is not dignified." I chanced a glance at Bella. Her hand was still clutching her face. Tanya had hit her hard, it might even purple up. I was suddenly furious with my wife, "Explain."

"I sent her and Lauren to the market to buy doormouse. They returned empty handed." Tanya stuck her chin out defiantly at Bella.

I saw Bella raise her head and then drop it again. She wanted to speak, "Bella?" I asked her.

"Yes, Dominus." She took her hand away from her face and looked at me from under her lashes. I had to fight to keep my concentration. Her eyes could distract me from anything it seemed.

"Was there a reason you returned without the doormouse?" I asked her gently.

"The trader wasn't there. Lauren and I asked some of the others. They said he was sick at home and wouldn't be back for at least a few days." She bit her lip nervously.

"Did you explain this to my wife?" I tried to keep my voice even.

"Yes Dominus."

I looked at Tanya who was still staring down at Bella with a look of incredible smugness. It took me a moment to realise that she expected me to side with her. It did nothing for my temper.

Normally I would not have scolded Tanya in front of a slave. It did not help to maintain disipline and I did not want to humiliate her. This time I was prepared to make an exception. I had not seen Bella for longer than a few seconds in days. After the stress of avoiding her, I needed her to know that I would not allow her to be hurt. I wanted to show her that I was better than my recent behaviour. "Tanya, you will not beat the slaves for things beyond their control."

Tanya turned to me with a stunned look on her face. Then she flushed in embarassment. "It is my right to beat my slaves if I am displeased with them." She tried to look imperious.

Fury flooded through me. I glared at Tanya and she actually withered under my gaze. "You will not do so again. If there is any discipline to be given out, I will be the one to do it. Am I making myself clear?"

Tanya looked almost as angry as me. She gave a sharp nod and stalked from the room. I watched her retreating form with disgust. Then I realised I was alone with Bella for the first time in days and I felt my heart speed up.

I was tempted to just walk out of the room but it would be cowardly if I did. Instead I turned and faced her. For once Bella wasn't staring at the floor. She was looking straight at me. I moved towards her and gently touched her cheek. "Are you allright? Does it hurt badly."

Bella shook her head, "No Dominus. I'm well." She turned her face into my touch just a little and I dropped my hand. If I didn't I knew where it lead. She would be in my arms again.

"I'm sorry she hit you." My voice came out breathily. I couldn't pull away from her eyes.

Bella nodded and gave me a small smile but she didn't move either. Then the door behind us creaked and Alice bounded into the room. She froze when she saw us stood by the fireplace. A look of suspicion crossed her face before she could cover it.

I cleared my throat and smiled at her. Then I turned back to Bella, "If it begins to swell, put some ice on it."

Bella nodded, "Thank you."

Bella dropped her eyes to the floor again, which was probably a good idea, "I am truly sorry Bella. It wont happen again."

Bella nodded and I turned to leave the room. On the way I turned to Alice, "Stay with her for a while. I need to have a word with my wife."

I couldn't be sure but it looked as though Alice was almost convinced that she had mistaken the moment. She had switched her attention to Bella's face and was examining her friend for any other injuries. "Yes Dominus."

I left the room and prepared myself for another argument with Tanya.

XXX

Tanya had recovered her composure by the time my family began arriving. First was my grandfather Aro, and his wife Sulpicia. I hadn't seen him in some time. He had always been very fond of me, but the affection was a little one sided. Over the years I had pieced together enough of our family history to know that he had not approved of my father at all. Esme had been married twice by her family to husbands who died before she was allowed to make her own choice.

I couldn't imagine my parents with anyone but each other and the idea that my grandfather had kept them apart did not endear him to me. Add to that I always found him unsettling. He seemed to me the kind of man who would embrace you with one hand and stab you with the other. But only if he thought it was necessary of course.

Next to arrive was my great uncle Caius, his whole family arrived at the same time. He and his wife Athenodora had three daughters who were my second cousins. Zafrina was the eldest, she was almost my height and was almost as stubborn as Rosalie. She and her husband Dimitri constantly had raging arguments as he was not a weak man. Though when I looked at them I could almost see how much they loved each other. They had been fortunate enough to make an allegiance marriage that turned into love. I envied them sometimes.

Zafrina and Dimitri had a daughter of their own named Carmen, she had turned fifteen two weeks ago. She arrived clutching her husband's hand. I didn't know if her devotion to Eleazer, and his to her, would fade with youth but I hoped not.

Their middle daughter's name was Kachiri. She was married to a man twenty years her senior, whose name was Stefan Romani. She had wanted him for his power and he had wanted her for her youth. Strangely, several years later they still seemed happy with each other. They were each getting exactly what they wanted from their marriage.

Kachiri had even given him the son he had always wanted; the son four previous wives had failed to produce. He was named Garrett. He had made an advantageous marriage to a young woman named Kate six months ago. She was so reserved it was hard to guage their relationship.

The youngest daughter was Senna. She had always been quiet and shy but she had a sweet and generous nature when she decided that she loved you. She was a good wife to her husband Vladimir and a good mother to her daughter Irina.

Irina seemed to take after her aunt Zafrina however. She even reminded me a little of Alice in her temperament.

Everyone was greeted and embraced as they came through the door. My great Uncle Marcus and great aunt Didyme arrived next. Didyme was a true beauty and she grew more so with every year; she lit up any room she entered. Charmingly however, she seemed completely unaware of her gift. She gave apologies for Liam and Siobhan and their daughter Maggie. They were running late and would be here soon.

I received them all graciously but I was awaiting our guest of honour. My mother and Father, Emmett and Roslie arrived together. I embraced Esme eagerly. I hadn't seen much of her recently. "Happy birthday mother," I said planting a kiss on her cheek.

"Thank you my son. And thank you Tanya dear," she said embracing my wife. "It is so kind of you to hold this party; such a wonderful surprise."

Tanya smiled fondly at Esme. Everyone loved my mother and she always found something to love in everyone she met. "You are welcome. It was my honour. Please..."

Tanya led our guests through to the main room where I could see Alice and Lauren serving drinks. Emmett clapped me on the shoulder, "I hear Jasper and Taylor have been notified of another tour."

Esme heard our conversation and looked at me in concern, "You're thinking of going away again Edward?"

I could have hit him. I might have done it if our mother hadn't been looking at us. It was difficult to claim Emmett had started it if she was actually watching me at the time. "I'm not sure mother. I have thought about it. But I'm happy at home at the moment." I was distracted from our conversation. The reason for my contentment, and my torment, had just entered the room. She was placing trays of food on the table, ready for Alice and Lauren to hand them out.

As she disappeared back into the kitchen, I looked back at Esme who was smiling widely at me, "Oh that is good news. If you would like it, I'm sure you father could introduce you to some people who would help you increase your reputation."

"That's very kind mother. I am not truly settled on any course yet." Out of the corner of my eye I saw Bella reappear. It was most unsettling, "I can take my time deciding after all." I smiled down at Esme.

"Of course you can. Oh who is this?" Alice had popped up at my elbow with a tray of food.

"This is Alice. She is one of our new slaves. A very good worker this one." I smiled at Alice and it was returned. She gave my mother a curtsey and offered the food around. I wasn't particularly hungry, but I took a cup of wine from Michael as he passed.

While my mother was offering her compliments on the food, I was looking for the source. Bella finally came through the door again. This time she looked straight over at me, almost as though she had known where I was standing. She flushed and dropped her eyes, then she began to walk towards me. I took a large draft of my wine and waited for her. I couldn't imagine why she would need to speak to me now, but I was thrilled that she did.

When she was quite close I realised that she was not heading towards me. Instead she carried on just past me and touched Michael's arm. She said something quietly to him and he followed her from the room.

The whole time they were moving towards the door I wanted to stop them, but Esme was still trying to speak to me. She was asking when I was going to give her a grandchild...again. I couldn't concentrate. Once Bella and Michael disappeared out of the house I lost any semblance of focus. I begged my mother to excuse me for a moment, which she did of course, and I made to follow them.

I didn't trust him to be anywhere near her. I refused to consider the possibility that she might have asked him to follow her for amorous reasons. I did not believe Bella was like that, but I had to admit to myself that I didn't know her well at all. I just wanted her.

As I reached the door Michael came back in. He looked surprised to see me so close to the door and he bowed his head. In his arms there was a large bowl of fruit. It was a beautiful display and probably quite heavy. I stood to the side and allowed him to carry it in.

I took several deep breaths of cool outside air. I was behaving like a fool. Bella had obviously just asked Michael to help her carry the food in and I was rushing off to defend her honour from nothing. I was asking for attention tonight it seemed and it had to stop.

The upsetting truth was that I didn't know what I was going to do about it. Not just tonight but ever. I had considered getting rid of her, perhaps Rosalie and Emmett would take her in. They would be more likely to do so now that they were sampling her cooking, but I couldn't do it. Even if I could part her and Alice, the idea of not seeing her hurt me almost physically.

The last few days had been difficult. I had seen her but I had tried to minimize our contact. I shook my head in disgust at myself. Tonight was my mother's birthday and I was not going to ruin it for her. I was going to do everything I could to make sure she had a good night.

XXX

In the end I was required to do almost nothing. Tanya had planned everything well and my slaves carried it all out perfectly. As far as I could tell everyone had a wonderful time. Liam, Siobhan and their daughter Maggie arrived and dinner was served. We gave Esme our gifts and she exclaimed over each one. We all laughed a lot, ate a greal deal and drank far too much. It was a night of excess, but the good kind.

I caught Emmett watching me only once. I had been lost in thought after I had sampled Bella's dessert. I had been thinking what a wonderful wife she would have made and I must have looked melancholy. I gave him a grin and raised my sixth glass of wine that evening. His raised his in return and we both went back to conversation.

My head was swimming slightly with all the wine I had consumed. I had eaten little but I wasn't too drunk. Normally I would be cheerful at this stage of intoxication but instead it made me pensive.

I had to concentrate to keep up the act as long as I did, but finally people started to take their leave. I saw my mother to the door after midnight. She was almost tearful with pleasure when she wished us farewell. Only Emmett and Rosalie were left, "Oh my wonderful sons. The god's truly blessed me when they gave me the two of you," she gushed.

"Thank you mother," I said and kissed her cheek again. Emmett embraced her gently, she looked so small in his arms. He whispered something to her and she held him tighter for a moment.

Carlisle wrapped an arm around her when she disentangled herself from us. "We shall see you all soon I hope." They left with promises of another dinner soon.

I turned to my brother, "Would you both like another glass of wine before you leave? Or if you would like to stay I can have Lauren prepare a room."

"I wouldn't object to one more glass," said Rosalie. "But I think we should return home afterwards."

Emmett nodded, "One more glass then."

I excused myself and went to use the water closet. I was surprised with how well the evening had gone. I should have known better than to give thanks too quickly. When I neared the courtyard again I could hear raised voices. I sighed when I realised it was Tanya and Rosalie. I wished selfishly that I had a wife who screamed just a little less. I had no objection to her speaking her mind, but I hated the shrieking.

"You can never keep your mouth shut! You always have to interfere!" Tanya was red in the face. Rosalie was affecting an air of calm which was not helping.

"I was not speaking to you. I was speaking to my husband." Rosalie said.

"Ladies please," Emmett was between the two women looking helpless. He hated it when they fought as much as I did. It put the two of us in awkward positions.

"Yes, your precious husband. If you are so happy in your marriage why must you intrude on mine?" Tanya spat.

"Marriage? Ha! That's funny. You and Edward don't have a marriage. No one wanted you to be a part of this family. Not even Peter. No one wants you." Rosalie had a knack for cutting close to the bone and she was pulling no punches.

Tanya's fists clenched, "You're jealous."

"Of what?" Rosalie asked quietly.

"You want to have both of them. You didn't have to share them when you were children and now you do. You're jealous." Tanya was pointing an accusatory finger.

Rosalie just laughed, "You're wrong. If I was to be jealous, it wouldn't be of you. Your husband cares more for his brother and me than for you."

"Enough!" I yelled. I was loud enough to get their attention and they both stopped fighting to look at me. I dropped my voice and my shoulders went with it. "I don't even want to know what it was about this time. I don't care. Enough," I said wearily. I was suddenly exhausted. My nerves were stretched tight as it was, "Tanya, would you please retire for the evening. I will resolve this."

"But I..."

"Please Tanya. Do as I'm asking you." Tanya looked furious but she didn't argue anymore. She shot me a look that clearly wished me ill and stalked up the stairs. Once I heard the door of our bedroom shut I turned to my stubborn sister-in-law.

I had been planning to be very firm about this but seeing the look on her face I changed my mind. She looked contrite and I softened, "You can't keep doing this little Rose. It has to stop." I rarely used her childhood name. I had given it to her.

"I'm sorry Edward, I just...She just..." Rosalie bit her lip nervously. She did look truly sorry.

I took pity on her, I understood. She felt I was missing out and Tanya was the person she blamed. I thought sometimes that blaming Tanya made her feel better. It allowed to her to assuage her own guilt. After all, Emmett could have married Tanya if I would have allowed it. "I know, I know. And sometimes I feel the same way." Recently I had felt the same way more than ever before. "But when you go home I have to stay here with her. I have to live with the consequences."

Rosalie teared up a little, "It seems like that is all you do, Edward. You make everyone else happy and suffer yourself. It's not fair and I feel as though it is all her fault and..."

"But it isn't. I understand your feelings, but she is not truly to blame. I'm sure she would prefer a husband who was truly devoted to her, but that it not what she has. She has me and I have her. This is the way it is. It's too late now and I have to live with it." My voice had been growing more and more agitated. I had barely noticed but now I realised that both Emmett and Rosalie were looking at me in a puzzled way. "I'm sorry, it's been a long night and we've all had too much wine."

Emmett nodded, "Edward's right...little Rose." She smiled at him, "We should leave."

Rosalie nodded and wiped her face delicately. She took a trembling breath, "I'm sorry Edward. I won't do it again."

I laughed softly and leant forward to kiss her cheek, "I suspect you will. But you're right. I do love you both more. She knows it. You don't need to remind her."

Rosalie flushed, "That was cruel of me. I shouldn't have said it. She just made me so angry."

"You hid it well," I said with a grin.

Emmett laughed, "That's my Rosalie. Ice cool in a fight."

Rosalie managed a small smile, "We'll go now Edward. I'm sorry."

She apologised twice more on her way to the door. I leant against it after they had gone. I loved Rosalie. She cared for me so much and I could not have asked for a better sister in law. I would do anything for her and I had done much; a lot. We all had. But sometimes she could be damn impossible. I swallowed hard.

I could definitely feel the wine in my blood now. I staggered forward in the direction of my bed. I just needed to sleep and forget for while. Tanya was still awake when I reached our room. "Did you tell her off?" She asked sitting up in bed.

"I handled it Tanya." I started to reach to undo my tunic.

"You've said that before and it always happens again." Tanya's voice was getting louder again. Perhaps I should have let her and Rosalie finish their argument. Her yelling at Rosalie was better than her yelling at me. I was not prone to such cowardly thoughts but I was hardly throwing Rosalie to the wolves; she fought with my wife better than I did.

"I don't wish to discuss it." I said as calmly as I could.

"Well I do!" Her voice cut through me like a blade.

"What would you like to say Tanya? What would you like me to say? It is what it is. I will not cut ties with my brother and his wife. You will just have to find some way to get along." I abandoned removing my tunic. I was too tense to work the fastenings.

Tanya was still yelling, "It's not my fault. She despises me for no reason. She's mad..."

"For god's sake woman," I finally yelled back, "I don't wish to hear anymore of this." I opened the door and stormed out of the room. I couldn't look at her right now. This was not her fault, but it was not mine either and we both suffered. I knew it was unfair but I couldn't help comparing her to Bella. Bella brought me calm, Tanya just seemed to churn the very air around her.

I rubbed my hands over my face and poured myself a glass of wine. All remnants of our meal had been cleared away. Other than the wall hangings and the spit-roast oven I could still see in the courtyard my house looked normal again. I was very impressed. The little imp had clearly been let loose after people started to leave. Only she could clear away at this speed.

I took my glass of wine outside and sat down on the wooden bench. The cool air of the night helped to clear my head a little. Now that everyone was gone I found it hard to get my mind off Bella. She had made short appearances tonight, but I had spent more time searching for her than watching her.

I wondered if perhaps she had been avoiding me as I had been avoiding her. It was odd but the thought hadn't occurred to me before. Was Bella suffering as I was? Did she miss me as I craved her? Just because she liked me did that mean she would lament my loss? Perhaps. I lamented hers after all. She had seemed so calm in that room, but did she really feel that way? If Rosalie could present a calm mask, perhaps Bella could too.

I wasn't sure if it was just the wine but suddenly it seemed very important that I find out. I didn't think it would make me feel any better if she was, but I would like to know anyway. I drained my glass and got to my feet. I was only a little unsteady.

I knew that I should go back upstairs to my wife. I should sleep until I was myself again. Even if Tanya wanted more arguing tonight I didn't have to give it to her. I could just tell her to let me be and go to sleep. But I didn't want to do that.

I staggered carelessly across the courtyard. I knew I should be trying to be quieter. I didn't want to wake up Alice or Michael or Lauren. I didn't even want to wake up Bella. I just wanted to look at her; just for second. Maybe the answer would be written on her face. Then maybe I could sleep.

I had almost reached the door when I heard a familiar voice behind me. "Dominus? Is there something wrong?" I turned to see Bella standing in the doorway to the kitchen. It took a second for my brain to accept what my eyes were seeing, but she was definitely there. I walked towards her quickly and before I could lose my nerve I took her arm and led her back into the kitchen.

I shut the door behind us and turned to stare at Bella. I could barely see her in the gloom. None of the fires or torches were lit. There was only a little moonlight tonight but it didn't matter. I could see she had retreated around the small table in the centre of the room. It annoyed me that she had put distance between us but I pushed on. I had something important to ask, "Do you miss me?"

I heard the frown I couldn't truly see, "What...I don't understand Dominus."

I probably hadn't made myself very clear, "I miss you. Since the other day when we...I've been trying to stay away from you. It's hard and I miss you. So my question...do you miss me." The wine had loosened my tongue a lot. I thought Bella looked surprised, but at least she was looking straight at me, "Well?"

"Yes, Dominus. I don't know why, but I have missed you. I'm sorry, I know you said that it's wrong but I can't help it." My heart thudded loudly, I could hear it in my ears. She missed me; Bella missed me. Just like I had missed her.

"It's not wrong to miss me." I said in a whisper.

"You said what we did was wrong..." There was a quiet sob in her voice when she spoke. I seemed to be driving women to tears a lot of the moment. It had not been my previous habit at all.

"No, I said what I did was wrong. You did nothing. And no matter how wrong I was, I can't be sorry I did it."

Bella gasped slightly, her eyes drifted to my lips. She licked her own and I was lost. I was sick of fighting what I felt. It was too hard, I couldn't do it. I definitely couldn't do it drunk.

I moved round the table and swept Bella into my arms. Her hands went around me instantly and her embrace felt curiously familiar. As though it was a place I had been looking for all my life and now I had found it. I kissed her hard. If I gave myself time to think about this I might talk myself out of it and I didn't want to do that.

Bella whimpered when I dragged my lips from hers, but I just moved them down and pressed them to her neck gently. The scent of her skin was even stronger here, "You smell wonderful Bella." I kissed her throat again, trailing my lips upwards.

Bella pressed herself closer to me in response and I instantly began to harden. The feel of her body against me, even through clothing was enough to push me to the edge. My mouth found hers again and I could feel her breasts heaving against my chest.

I wanted to kiss them, I wanted to kiss every inch of her skin. I doubted that we would get that far tonight. My need for her was too strong for delays. I was aching for her. I reached down for her dress and pulled it up to her hip. Bella moved to help me and her actions cut the haze of lust I was seeing through.

I didn't let go of her dress but my other hand flew to her face, "Bella, do you want this?" I gasped, "You have but to say and I will stop now. I will never bother you again."

There was a pause and I wished I could see her face more clearly in the gloom. I could make out her features but not her expression. "I do not want you to stop Dominus. Unless you wish to."

My hands lifted her and sat her on the table. I positioned myself between her legs and pulled her tightly to me, grinding myself into her. "I don't not want to stop. Can you not tell?"

Bella whimpered and grabbed for my shoulders pulling my mouth back to hers. I could feel her heat and I hardened more. I tugged her dress up her legs and pushed her wrap aside. I groaned as my fingers touched her. She was wet and warm and I was distracted. I had thought of nothing but burying myself inside of her, but now I dropped to my knees. She was positioned perfectly on the table and when I ran my tongue over her she shuddered.

I wondered if any man had done this for her before. It was possible but not likely. I hoped not, I wanted to distinguish myself from them. I wanted Bella to love having me touch her. I could tell that she did not hate it. I felt her body relax and I knew she had lain down on the table. As my tongue stroked around her warm flesh she shivered and moaned quietly. When she was writhing under my mouth, I got to my feet. Bella sat up on the table and reached for me.

She was panting as I was, my treatment of her had only made my own situation worse. I was tempted to ask her again if she was sure she wanted to do this, but I knew she did. Bella was clutching at my back desperately. She was pressing herself against the hardness she could feel. I reached down between her legs and stroked her again, offering her relief while I freed myself from my clothes.

Bella was lying flat on the table again when I positioned myself at her entrance. She was wet and soft against my fingers and I wanted to feel her around me. I thrust into her perhaps a little harder than I realised, she was tight and hot. I groaned loudly at the sensation. I fit inside of her perfectly; she seemed made for me. She gasped and I thought it was pained. I had to remember that it had probably been some time since her last man.

I forced some control for somewhere and moved slowly, taking my time with her. I leant over her and pulled her mouth to mine. She wound her fingers into my hair and kissed me desperately. Her tongue stroked mine and I almost exploded. There was something incredibly arousing about her body being this close to mine, and it was not something I had experienced before.

I managed to stay gentle until Bella moaned into my mouth. Once I knew she was relaxed and enjoying it I sped up. I had not been finding it easy to take things slowly but it was worth it. The sounds coming from Bella were driving me mad. She was squeezing me tightly as I thrust into her. I clutched her body to mine and buried my face in her hair.

She felt better than anything, anything I had ever experienced. Her body quivered and trembled under mine. Her fingers pressed into my skin and I felt her teeth touch my neck. She bit down gently and her whole body shook more violently than anything so far. Even though she had attempted to muffle it I heard her wail in release.

Giving thanks to the gods that I had been able to hold on until Bella was satisfied, I let go of my control. I let out a strangled groan as I emptied myself into her. Her walls still trembled around me and the pleasure seemed to last forever, but in seconds my body was spent. I slipped into a kind of blissful trance lying exhausted on top of Bella. Her fingers were sliding through my hair again and again. For the first time in a long time I felt truly relaxed. I found it hard to believe I might ever want to move.

Until I heard movement outside. I felt Bella's body go rigid beneath mine. I obviously hadn't imagined the sound. "Quickly Bella." I got to my feet and helped Bella get to hers. She didn't speak she just began adjusting her dress. I helped her straighten out the back and then realised I was still uncovered. I pulled my tunic straight and felt Bella tugging it into place. I put my arm around her and dragged her gently to the more shadowy side of the room. If it was just one of the servants they might not come into the kitchen and we would be safe.

Unfortunately the gods had given me all the favour I was getting tonight but then, I had no complaints. I heard Tanya calling my name. I turned to Bella. It was starting to disturb me that she had not even spoken yet. I was anxious to give her a better chance to do so, but now was not the time.

"Bella," I whispered quickly, "I'm sorry but I have to go now. I don't want to. That..." I held my hand out to the table. "That was the most amazing thing... If you want me to come to you again I will. If you don't I will not." I slipped my hand up to her cheek and kissed her quickly and hard. I was trying to put as much feeling into it as I could. When I broke away I almost staggered, "I would like to very much." I pressed another quick kiss to her lips. I couldn't help myself. "Wait here and I will take Tanya away."

"Yes Dominus," Bella whispered. I suddenly hated her use of the word 'Dominus'. I didn't find it appropiate anymore. Deciding I was out of time anyway, I kissed her one last time and walked quickly to the kitchen door.

I took a breath and flung the door open. Tanya was looking in each of the stable stalls. Perhaps she expected to find me passed out in there. I raised my voice and made an effort to slur my words. "Here I am wife. I'm coming now." I staggered out of the kitchen and shut the door behind me.

I wished that I could turn straight back around. I wanted to go back to Bella. It didn't seem right to leave her but I couldn't really see an alternative. I held out my arm to Tanya, "Help me upstairs. Please?"

Tanya gave a small smile and moved to assist me in my drunken state. She didn't know it had already been cured.

XXX


	4. Chapter 4

**Thanks go out to x123 and weekitty who will just NOT. STOP. REVIEWING. God love and bless them.**

**And a thank toy to LizS2009 and Kgunter34 who said nice things and made me want to update.**

**I don't know if anyone was reading my previous story and is wondering why this one is taking so much longer. The truth is that I'm not sure, but I update at least once a week. Death, taxes and this are sure things.**

**XXX**

Chapter four

The next day was a kind of delicious torture. Tanya rose early with me and we breakfasted together. Bella was serving this morning and every time I looked at her she seemed to be looking straight back at me. I was elated by the constant sight of her brown eyes, it was just that it was no easier than before to tear my gaze away.

Added to that I now kept imaging how she felt when I was inside of her. I kept seeing her lying on the table. I thought of how her body had trembled, how she had clutched my shoulders and how her teeth felt against my neck. Every time I did I had to quickly recite the names of Rome's many senators. It had a physcial effect on me. The last thing I wanted was Tanya noticing and getting ideas...in any sense.

I went out as usual to visit my patients both old and new. My mornings were dedicated to visiting patients, I always had a list. New requests arrived and I added new patients every day. There had been a brawl at one of the markets and I had the care of two men who had been stabbed. Seeing them put me ill at ease. Perhaps in the future I would only send Michael to the market.

I didn't dwell on the matter long, as soon as I was gone from the house I started to want to return. I had been considering calling on Jasper today but it didn't seem so urgent now. I wondered what Bella was doing and spent several happy minutes imagining her cooking or laughing with Alice. Then it occurred to me that Tanya had hit her yesterday. Perhaps my wife might try to cure her annoyance at what I had said by doing the same again. After that thought I hurried more than before.

I was home before the food was ready for once and I immediately made for the kitchen. I expected to see Bella cooking and I schooled my face in case she was not alone. But only Lauren was there. She was stirring something in a large pot. "Yes Dominus?"

"Oh...Is the food almost ready?" I asked feeling foolish.

Lauren seemed to notice nothing, "Yes Dominus."

I gave a sharp nod and left the room. I checked around the courtyard but there was no sign of Bella...or Tanya. I crossed the yard and walked the length of the servants quarters. Through the open door of the room that used to be Michael's I could see a dress over the back of a chair. The garment was plain however and I couldn't be sure which one of them had taken it off.

What concerned me at the moment was that Bella was not currently in it. The adjoining door that my friends and I had fitted was shut as was the door to the other room. I couldn't hear anything from inside and I was debating whether to knock when I heard Bella yell. "Oh for the love of Juno will you let it be Alice!" My hand froze in shock halfway to the doorknob. I had never heard Bella speak like that before.

I barely had a second to consider how much I would like to see her roused like that when the door was flung open. Bella almost walked straight into me. Instead she stared at me in horror, then she dropped her eyes to the floor. I looked her over quickly, drinking in the sight of her. There was no evidence of any injury, inflicted by Tanya or otherwise and I relaxed a little.

Bella was still looking uncomfortable, "Excuse me Dominus. We were..."

"All is well. I just wanted to..." my voice trailed off lamely. What I wanted was right in front of me. I wracked my brain for inspiration. That was when I remembered that Alice was in the room. She was standing next to the bed and she was watching me. "I just wanted to tell you there will be one more for dinner tomorrow. Jasper will be joining us."

Well, he was now at any rate. The excuse was weak, there was no reason why I should have come to find them to tell them this. I could have mentioned it at any point this afternoon or this evening. Bella's blush was not fading. I had a feeling she knew I was lying, "Very well Dominus. Is there anything else?" She asked.

"No, thank you Bella." She nodded and hurried down the hall.

I reluctantly turned to Alice and smiled at her. Her expression was frozen and I had a terrible sinking feeling in my stomach. The smile slid off my face, "Is there something wrong Alice?" I asked. I was only pleased my voice didn't tremble. Her expression was darkening, it was one that could freeze mercury.

"It was you wasn't it? Dominus." She added the last word with a trace of a sneer to her voice. The sweet girl I had been getting to know had vanished. The imp I had seen crouching over Bella in the cage was back.

"What are you talking about?" I almost never had to stall for thinking time in the past. I was always a quick thinker, at least until I had met Bella and Alice. I wasn't even sure why I didn't just admit my actions. Even if I was personally ashamed I was within my rights; at least legally.

Alice didn't seem to care about the legality of the situation. "It was you. You had her. You had Bella last night didn't you?" Her directness was brutal and I knew she was not going to let me out of this. For a moment I wondered if her pride was hurt, after all I had refused her when she offered. One good look at her face told me this was not the case.

She wasn't jealous, she was furious. I couldn't even understand how she knew, unless... "Bella told you..?"

"She didn't tell me anything. But it's true, isn't it?" Alice eyes blazed into mine.

It didn't even occur to me to play the 'master' card. I knew that I could whip this girl until my arm gave out and she would not relent. "Alice..." As soon as I spoke her name she knew it was true, she heard it in my voice. She let out a shuddering breath and her hands clenched into fists.

"I trusted you," she whispered shaking her head.

"What?" I was bewildered. Her reaction seemed so extreme. She might think me a hypocrite after the speech I gave her the first night she was here; but surely nothing worse.

"I trusted you. I thought we would be safe here; that you would keep us safe." She put her head in her hands. She looked so distressed that I wanted to comfort her, but I didn't think she would let me.

"I will Alice. I won't let anything happen to either of..." I tried to reassure her but she cut me off.

"It's too late! I shouldn't have believed it. I shouldn't have trusted you. I should have watched more closely. You've ruined everything. You've ruined her. It was for nothing. It was all for nothing." Of all the women I had reduced to tears in the past few days I didn't think any of them had been as upset as Alice was right now; her face was dry however. Perhaps she was too angry to cry.

"Ruined her? What are you talking about? I didn't hurt her, I swear it."

"She still had a chance. She could have earned her freedom. She could have a married a good, respectable man who would have taken care of her. She could have been happy and you..." Alice began to pace the room.

Ignoring the twinge I had at the thought of Bella being free and marrying someone else, I continued the battle to get Alice to talk sense. "I don't understand..."

"Of course you don't." She threw her hands up in the air, "You didn't even think..."

"Think about what?" I asked gently. I was trying to keep the frustration out of my voice.

Alice just stood and stared at me. I waited for her to speak but she didn't even open her mouth. Then she took a deep breath and I was amazed by how quickly she had calmed herself, "Nothing. It doesn't matter. It's too late." She rubbed her hands over her face for a second. When she looked at me again her expression was blank. I found it disturbing. This didn't look like Alice the girl or the imp. She shook her head, "It's done." Then without another word she made to stride past me out of the room.

"Alice..." I said when she was level with me. I couldn't let her go like this, but I didn't know what to say. She stopped walking but she didn't even look at me.

"Was there something else Dominus?" Her voice was level and it unnerved me more.

I wished that she would look at me, all the things I could have said wouldn't come out. Instead I asked the thing I truly wanted to, "How did you know? If Bella didn't tell you, how did you know?"

Alice lip curled into a mirthless smile, "She was in pain today. When she walks, when she sits. And I washed your robes from last night." Without another word she strode down the hallway. I considered her words for about five seconds before I had to sit down on the edge of the bed and catch my breath.

XXX

I later supposed that it was unevitable, but at the time I was shocked by how quickly Tanya seemed to notice a difference. After my conversation with Alice, I was about to hurry after her but when I got to the courtyard Tanya was there. She told me that lunch was ready and I joined her at the table. All the time my head was spinning. I couldn't think of anything except Bella. I was a doctor and I didn't know how I could have missed the signs.

The only reasonable conclusion I could draw was that the wine had dulled my senses. I did remember her quiet gasp of pain and now it had new meaning. I gave thanks to the gods that I had not been overwhelmed and taken her roughly. The act itself could have been much worse.

The problem lay, as problems usually do, with the consequences. I had a momentary fit of pique when I was almost angry with Bella for not telling me but then, I had not asked. I didn't even understand how it could be possible, though I didn't doubt the truth of it. I had never met a slave girl over the age of thirteen who was a virgin. It was simply not something that existed. How Bella had remained pure, until I interfered, I had no idea.

I was not displeased by the idea. It gave me a thrill to know that I was Bella's first and only man. When that thought occured to me I had to add the thought, 'thus far'. I was very displeased by that idea.

When I shook myself from my reverie I looked up to find Tanya watching me with a frown on her face, "Is something wrong Edward?"

"No, I am well. Just thinking about one of my patients." I lied smoothly, "The man is in a bad state."

Tanya nodded but I thought she did not look entirely convinced, "Will he live do you think?"

I immediately summoned one of my patients to the fore of my mind. "Perhaps. He was stabbed at one of the markets and I believe his spleen was damaged."

Tanya's expression was one of distaste, "Oh."

I turned my attention to the door when I heard it open. Alice and Lauren came in and served us both. Lauren then left and Alice took up her station to keep watch for anything we might need. I knew she wasn't looking at me but her presence made me uncomfortable. I found that I wanted to talk to her again, though she might refuse now. I had ruined the trust I had been building with Alice, just as I had ruined Bella.

I sighed and began to pick at the excellent food on my plate. I just wasn't feeling very hungry. I couldn't help but keep glancing at Alice, although she kept her eyes firmly averted. When Lauren came in to help Alice clear our plates I looked up at Tanya. She was frowning at me again.

XXX

I had tried for the rest of the day to get a moment alone with Bella but I couldn't manage it. Tanya had definitely picked up on my mood at the table; now she was following me around. She suggested we go for a walk, or go to bed or go and visit my parents. I had the feeling she would do anything right now. Her female intuition was telling her that something was wrong with me and she was anxious to discover what it was.

In the end I made an excuse about checking on my patient again and I left the house. I didn't take Seth this time. I wanted to walk and to have time to think. Things had changed a lot since this morning and as much as I was craving Bella's company, I needed solitude to think. My house was currently full of women who wanted to kiss me or kill me. Their motivations and their rights to do either were somewhat blurred.

I took the long, almost circular route, but I knew where I was headed. My friend lived in the more...liberal part of town. Jasper opened the door within seconds of my knock. "Edward, brother," he said. He smiled in welcome and embraced me. "It's good to see you. Come in, come in."

I crossed the threshold into Jasper's small but comfortable house. Jasper could have lived elsewhere but chose to stay in the city as I did. He said it made him feel like a civilian after long periods away from home. I could sympathize.

I went into the main room and immediately made for the nearest chair. I had walked quickly for over an hour after very little food and I felt shaky. When I looked up Jasper had shut the door but he hadn't moved. He had a frown on his face; it was very similar to the one Tanya had worn only a few hours ago.

"What's happened brother?" He asked as he poured me a glass of water. Jasper had a way of getting to the heart of a matter, a trait he shared with Rosalie...and now Alice. I suddenly realised that it had been Jasper, Alice reminded me of earlier with her blunt outburst. He pulled up a chair next to mine. "Are Emmett and Rosalie...is everyone..?"

"Yes, yes," I assured him quickly. "Everyone is well. I am...I have done something."

Jasper frowned and I wondered what he was imagining. I doubted it would be anywhere close to the truth. "What have you done?" Her asked.

"You remember the two slave girls I bought recently?"

Jasper grinned, "Yes, the ones I'm to behave myself around. Emmett made me promise after smacking me around the head." I couldn't help but laugh, it certainly sounded like Emmett's version of 'gently'. If anyone else did that to Jasper they would probably lose the hand that did the smacking. "I'm sorry about that. I must have drunk too much."

I waved away his apology, "Think nothing of it. We all know of the evils of wine." I had gotten intimate with them as recently as last night.

"But you were saying?" Jasper coaxed.

I took a deep breath and just decided to spit it out. There was no way to gild the statement. "I had one of them last night." I muttered.

Jasper laughed again, this time loudly, "Oh brother, you just didn't want to share them. I understand." I knew he was only speaking in jest but the hypocrisy of my actions were wearing on my nerves.

"Jasper, that's not it at all and you should know it." I said firmly.

His laughter died down when he took in my expression. The humour vanished and he looked at me steadily. Perhaps he was taking in my demeanour all over again because suddenly I saw concern. "I'm sorry, of course I know that." He clapped me on the shoulder, "Which of the two are we talking about?"

"Not Alice," I said with a wry smirk.

Jasper had the grace to look briefly ashamed. He got back to the point, "I know you are probably not proud of having done it, but it's not the end of the world."

"I wish it was that simple. I...I feel for the girl." The words seemed petty and small when I compared them to what was going on inside my head. I just couldn't think of a better way to put it. "She's distracting and it's not getting any easier. I spend my time at home with her or looking for her and my time away wanting to get back to her."

Jasper raised his eyebrows, "Is that so? I've never heard you speak this way before."

I nodded, "And there's more."

"More?"

"I discovered after the fact that she was pure, a virgin. I don't even know how that's possible but it is so and now..." My voice trailed away. I didn't know how to finish the sentence.

"Now?"

"Now I feel more...worse and better. I just...I feel adrift. And I feel guilty, I defiled a virgin, the goddess spare me." I drank down the water. It was cool and refreshing but it did nothing for me at the moment. Had I not feared the consequences I would have asked for wine.

"Ah, my friend, my brother," said Jasper patting me on the shoulder. "You're sure?"

"I am." Even if I could doubt Alice's words, which I couldn't, I knew it. I would have known it immediately last night if I hadn't been so drunk, on wine and Bella.

Jasper took a breath, "Did you come here looking for advice or sympathy? Just so I know."

It was a fair question. "You're opinion on what I should do now would be appreciated."

"The prudent course?"

Jasper tended to assess anything from a military standpoint and that wasn't all I wanted here. "Yes, but a moral one also. Everything else I feel is stained with horrible guilt. I need to make it go away."

"Well..." Jasper was silent for a few minutes but I didn't interrupt his thinking. "The best thing for everyone would be to free the girl immediately. Attempt to find her a good man, and give assurances for their marriage. If you're feeling particularly generous you might even provide a dowry. Though as it is so unusual to do so, Tanya might be displeased."

I thought it over. Jasper's plan was a good one. I didn't care about Tanya's displeasure. Giving money to slaves sometimes happened when they had served for long periods of time and were freed. I didn't keep slaves for long and I always gave them money. I would find some way to justify it. Except...that I wasn't sure I could.

The idea of Bella leaving my house was painful. I might not see her again, that idea was unbearable. Jasper made an odd sound. "You're not going to do that, are you brother?"

When I looked at him he was staring at me shrewdly. "I...I must think it over." Even as the words were coming out of my mouth I knew they were fruitless. I had given myself away.

"You might think it over, but I don't believe you will do it. I know that look." He was smirking at me.

"You do?"

"Oh yes, I have seen it before. Your feelings for this girl go further than want."

"It is true." I said wearily.

"Are you in love with her yet?"

Was I? Was that what I was feeling? I had never felt this way before, but was I in love? Wasn't love supposed to be a complete feeling? If this was love I didn't understand how it could keep growing every day, how it could take over more and more of my thoughts. "I...I do not know. But...the idea of being without her...is crippling."

"Oh brother, you are a lost man." Jasper was smiling but it was sympathetic.

I thought of Bella and my chest tightened. Every part of me wished for her to be here. If this was not love, then it was something else, something stronger. I finally felt like I understood Paris of Troy. I would take Bella, I would take her and let the armies come just as he had.

I got to my feet, "I think you're right, I am a lost man. By the way, would you come for dinner tomorrow? I was flustered before and I improvised a lie to that effect."

Jasper laughed and insisted on the whole story.

XXX

When I arrived home I was no closer to a solution. I ate dinner with Tanya and retired to bed as soon as was decent. Tanya had not left my side since I had come through the door. She was still alert for trouble and seemed to think the way to deal with it was to watch me until she discovered the cause. Bella had not served us this evening and I had to go to bed or succumb to the urge to seek her out.

I guessed that Tanya would attempt to seduce me once we got into bed and I was alarmed by the fact that she did not. She lay next to me and stared at the ceiling. I dared to hope that I had earned a reprieve but no, "Edward, are you sure that there is nothing wrong? I would like you to talk to me about it if there is."

I sighed, "There is nothing wrong with me Tanya."

She was silent for a few moments but then she sighed heavily, "Edward if you do not wish to confide in me then you don't have to. But please let's not lie to each other."

"Tanya, I..."

"It doesn't matter. Let's just go to sleep." I was horrified to hear her voice break. She turned her back to me. I could do nothing right it seemed. I was upsetting everyone.

I turned to Tanya and put a hand on her shoulder, "I'm sorry. There is truly nothing wrong. I have been considering going away again but I am not sure. I have a lot of things on my mind." Tanya nodded but she didn't say anything. "I am sorry," I said quietly.

Tanya turned and pressed her lips to mine. She began to kiss me passionately, her hands touching my chest. I considered pushing her away but I found I couldn't do it. She was my wife and I was hurting her. If I refused her now there would be consequences. I put my hand on her breast and squeezed gently.

Tanya moaned and clutched me tighter. I had to fight not to grit my teeth.

XXX

It was two days before I was able to get Bella alone. She was in the kitchen clearing away pots and pans. The light was shining through the window onto her hair, it shone and I wanted to bury my face in it as I had the night I had had her. I must have let out an audible sound because Bella span on her heel to face me.

The pan she was holding crashed to the floor and her hand flew to her chest, "I'm...I'm sorry Dominus."

I bent and picked up the pan and handed it back to her. "Please, Bella don't apologise...please..." I reached for her hand and rubbed my thumb across the back.

She blushed prettily and met my eyes, "What would you like me to say Dominus?" I felt her grip my hand and my heart thudded. I had to fight to remember what I was supposed to be doing here.

"I would like to know why you didn't tell me." It didn't seem like the most important thing I was hoping to talk about. I had already conceded to myself that I was as culpable as she, after all I hadn't asked. Still, I thought it was a good place to start.

"Why I didn't tell you what?" Bella's words were quiet but her blush spoke loudly. She dropped her eyes, but only for a second.

"You know what, that no man had touched you. It's the kind of thing you should tell a man." Though, if I was being fair, how was she to know that?

"Alice told you?" I was interested to note that Alice had not mentioned our argument. I had thought that she would.

"We discussed it," I said tersely.

Bella nodded, "I might have known she would be able to tell." An exasperated look came over her face and I found myself transfixed. It was not an expression I had seen before and it was beautiful. "And there aren't many other men it could have been I suppose."

"Bella, why didn't you tell me? I should have heard it from you."

She shrugged and spread her hands helplessly, "I thought you wanted me."

"Bella I did, I did. But...I took something from you... That honour should have gone to your husband. It was not right of me to do that."

"I'm sorry Dominus."

"For the love of the gods Bella will you please stop apologising. There is no blame on you here. This is all my fault. I am trying to apologise to you." She dropped her eyes and that little crease appeared between them, "Look at me Bella, you did nothing wrong."

"Then why aren't you happy?" She sighed.

I tried once again to explain, "Bella, I took something..."

"You took nothing, except what I offered." Her voice had gained something of an edge and her brown eyes flashed at me. "You asked me...

Her voice dropped off as we both heard sounds coming from the courtyard. I cursed my luck, it seemed that Bella and I were constantly being interrupted. I let go of her hand and turned to the door. "Bella, I just wanted to tell you that if I had known I would have not touched you. I don't even know how you kept your virginity, but however it was done it was not right of me to take it like I did. So, I'm sorry."

I turned back for one last look at her, I expected her to be gazing at the floor again but she wasn't. She was staring at me and I saw another new expression. It almost shocked me, something close to fury. She didn't speak and as I was in sight of the courtyard I was hailed by my visitor.

I took me a second to realise it was Emmett's new man Jacob. "Good day Dominus. My master begs you come to the Domina. She is unwell."

I glanced back once towards the kitchen. Bella was still stood where I had left her. I didn't want to go now, it felt as wrong as it had the other night. Once again I seemed to have little other choice. I nodded, "Of course, I will fetch my bag and my horse.

XXX

I got to my feet and walked around Rosalie. Emmett had confined her to her bed and she wasn't too happy about it. "Will you please tell him that there is nothing wrong with my legs Edward. Please?"

She had fainted in the garden and hit her head. Emmett had perhaps been a little overzealous in his quest to protect her, but we had all been guilty of that. Though now I had the task of breaking some news to them. It was always different when one's own family were involved. "Little Rose, I want you to listen to me. You too Emmett."

The mood in the room shifted. The irritation left Rosalie's face and she bit her lip. Emmett went and sat by her on the bed, "What's wrong with her Edward?"

I took a deep breath and ran my hands through my hair, "Your wife has developed a condition." I said. Emmett reached for Rosalie's hand but both of them remained silent. "There is an excellent chance of recovery if the situation it handled correctly.

"Just tell me what to do." Emmett said quietly.

I put my hand on my brother's shoulder. "You must take care of her, you must make sure she has everything thing she needs. Then you must go to the market and hire the most skilled tradesman to make you a new bed."

"A new bed?" Rosalie asked frowning.

"Yes a new bed." I said nodding seriously. Then I held my hands a small distance apart. "It should be about this long and it will need to be ready by Concord. If your child is to have anywhere to sleep."

Both of them gaped at me for a full ten seconds without moving. They looked completely stupified. Then Emmett leapt to his feet and punched me hard on the arm. "You son of Hades. You frightened me to death!" His yelling was marred by the enormous grin on his face. "You were there worrying me senseless when I'm about to be a father." His eyes fell on Rose. She hadn't moved, she was sitting up in bed with a blissful smile of her face.

Emmett rushed towards her and I grabbed his arm with the one good one I had, "No Emmett. If she fainted it could be a sign. She could be in for a difficult pregnancy. No rough stuff."

Emmett pulled his hands away as though he had been scolded, "Oh right."

I chuckled, "I didn't say don't touch her, I just said be gentle. No throwing her around."

It was Rosalie's turn to laugh, "Yes, the next time you want to throw me over your shoulder. Don't. Not for a while anyway."

Emmett turned pale, "Oh hell, I did that last night." He turned to me, "Was that why she fainted? Did I hurt her? Was it my fault?"

"Calm down brother. She's fine. No harm done. Just remember what I said. Whatever she needs she gets." Emmett nodded decisively. If Rosalie said she wanted a giraffe I suspected herwould go and get her one from Egypt. "Rosalie, you are confined to this bed until futher notice. I want you to lie in for now. Understood?"

Rosalie nodded, "Of course."

"I will come and see you tomorrow. When your heartbeat is steadier you might be able to get up. But we will have to wait and see. If you must go about the house, get Emmett or the servants to carry you."

"I'll just stay here. If it's better for the baby." She was smiling contentedly but I wasn't fooled. Rosalie clearly believed what she was saying but if her condition did not improve she could be in bed for months. I had seen it before, women could go a little mad when pregnant anyway. Restricting their freedoms did not help.

"Perhaps it is almost time for lunch. Something light for the new mother?" Both Emmett and Rosalie beamed at my words.

XXX

Tanya's mood had taken a severe downturn for the evening. I had arrived home late anyway and as we sat together enjoying dinner I told her about Rosalie's big news. I really hadn't thought it through and although I wasn't expecting it I was not surprised to see Tanya cringe. Of course the news that the sister-in-law she hated was pregnant would be unwelcome. She wanted a child herself she wasn't interested in becoming an aunt.

She excused herself for the evening as soon as she had finished eating. I knew Tanya probably wanted me to follow her but I felt as though I was wedged into my chair. Last night had exhausted all my energies with regard to her. I couldn't put in a performance like that every night, it was too difficult.

"You really didn't know?" Alice voice cut through my thoughts. I hadn't even realised that she was in the room. She was standing at the other end of the table clearing Tanya's plates.

"Hmm?" I asked confused as to what she was talking about.

Alice raised her eyebrows as though questioning my sanity, "You didn't know that Bella was a virgin?"

There was no point in asking how she knew, "I honestly had no idea." I ran my hands through my hair distractedly, and sank further down in my chair. Somewhere in the back of my head I was grateful that Alice was talking to me again. It was one less thing for me to feel bad about. "I knew I shouldn't, but I didn't know it was...I didn't know."

Alice gave an irritated sigh, "I think you should speak to her...Dominus." I almost smiled at her attempt at formality. For some reason it was not a real part of our relationship and I was glad. I wished that Bella viewed things the same way.

Then I repeated what she had said to myself. If anything I would have expected Alice to warn me away from Bella. I tried to keep the surprise out of my voice, "You do?"

"She's sad. She was happy before and now she's sad." Alice said simply shrugging. "I think you can change that."

The thought of Bella being unhappy made my chest hurt. I remembered the anger on her face when I had been called away. Was that anger just masking hurt? "How?"

"I don't know," unless I was very much mistaken there was a smirk on her face, "But it's done and it can't be undone. There's little point in beating your breast about it. Especially if all it does is make you miserable, both of you."

I wished I was like Alice, so certain of everything all the time. I remembered the feeling from not so long ago. Alice was staring at me expectantly, in a way that reminded me of my mother. I got to my feet without another word and headed for the kitchen. I knew that Bella had been the one cooking tonight, it had been excellent.

This time I knocked before I entered, rather than startle her to death. Bella turned her face to the side but it was too late. I had already gotten a good look. If I had planned a speech I wouldn't have remembered it, so I took it as a good thing that I hadn't.

Instead I decided to just try and get her to talk to me, "Bella, what can I do? I know that I have made you unhappy somehow and I would like to fix it." Her eyes gave her away, she had definitely been crying at some point today. I watched her almost frantically. If she would tell me how to make it better, I would do anything.

Bella sighed and turned to face me. She was blushing furiously, "Dominus, did you not...enjoy having me?"

"What? Of course I did. Could you not tell?" I didn't see how she could have mistaken my feelings.

"I thought I could. But then you came to me and said it was all a mistake...again." Her eyes flashed and I felt my heart speed up. She was exceptionally beautiful when she was angry. I fought to stay focused.

"Bella, I don't...You know I don't normally interfere with my slaves..."

She waved her hand and cut me off, "Yes, you mentioned that Dominus, after the first time you kissed me."

Now I was the one colouring. I dropped my eyes and they landed on the table. I imagined Bella sprawled on top of it beneath me and the blush deepened. "I know what I said. I know what a hypocrite I am. I just feel like I did..."

"Dominus, stop. I beg you to stop. If you have come to apologise again then I don't want to hear anymore please. You asked me if I wanted you to stop and I told you not to. You asked me to forgive you and I tell you that there is nothing to forgive. You gave me the choice and I made it."

It was the longest speech I had ever heard her make and for the first time I knew I was falling in love with this girl. There was no way to prevent it now. There was fire in her, the same fire Alice had, though it was tempered with something incredibly sweet. Now she added something else, a rationality that surprised me. She was perfect, how could I stay away from her? Alice was right after all, the damage was done. "Can you really see it that way?" I asked her breathlessly.

Her eyes softened and she smiled just a little, "I do see it that way. It is that way."

I felt my feet moving me towards her, I wasn't sure how it had happened but I wasn't stopping it either. "Then can I ask you something?"

Bella looked up into my eyes, "Yes."

I lifted a hand and touched her hair with the tip of my finger. "Why did you not tell me to stop?"

I felt Bella's fingers on my chest before I saw her move, I was too lost in her eyes, "Because I wanted you." Her fingers were in my hair curling round the strands. She tugged me towards her gently and I was lost.

There might have been a possibility that I could have resisted touching her, but I couldn't fight her off. I didn't want to. "Oh Bella..."

"Where is it written that a man cannot have his slaves if he wants?" She whispered and she pressed herself against me. I couldn't stop my body responding helplessly to her.

"You're the only one I've ever wanted," I said as I slid my fingers into her hair. "You are the most beautiful thing I've ever seen."

Bella rocked onto her toes and I pulled her the rest of the way. Once our lips met I knew I didn't have a lot of time. I couldn't let the kiss go on so I pulled away, "Meet me just outside the door in five minutes. Cover your face."

Bella staggered for a second but she nodded. I pressed a kiss to her forhead and slipped out of the kitchen. My breathing was unsteady but I walked straight across the courtyard. Michael was already in the stables for the night but he jumped to attention and fetched Seth from his stall. I was watching but I didn't see Bella slip out of the door. I just had to trust that she had. I took Seth out without a saddle. I didn't want to waste time.

I told Michael to go to bed and led Seth out of the door. I looked around but I couldn't see Bella. I felt my heart sink to my knees and then I heard a rustle and she melted out of the shadows. I was sure it was her because I recognised her dress, I could see nothing of her face or hair.

I held out my hand and she came to my side without a word. I got her seated on Seth and got up behind her. My arms went around her and my heart thudded in my chest. It was partly the realisation that I was really going to do this. I gripped the reins with one hand and held Bella with the other as I steered Seth through the streets. It was not late yet, only a few hours past sunset and the streets were still full of people. We went unnoticed.

Eric greeted me as he had the other day, with enthusiasm. He was about to call upstairs to summon his newest girls but I gripped his arm gently. "Eric, I would just like a room if there's one available."

"Well, sir, a man is just about to take the last..."

"I will be happy to pay double. And the difference." He knew what I meant, I would pay for a girl I wouldn't be having. Eric knew a good deal when one was offered. He nodded and bowed and thanked me for my custom. Bella stood behind me and didn't say a word. We took a different room than last time though it's furnishings were identical and I wondered, as I had then, whether this had been a good idea.

My only thought had been getting to place where we could be alone and uninterrupted. Perhaps I should have tried to think of something better. But there weren't really any other options. I shut the door behind us and Bella removed the cloth. I breathed a sigh of relief, I could tell by the look on her face that she had no objections. Her breasts were heaving against the confines of her dress and the movement caught my eye. I hadn't really gotten to see her last time but I would remedy the situation tonight.

I moved towards Bella and she reached for me. Her grip was surprisingly firm and she tugged me to her. I went willingly, liking her show of want very much. There was less haste than last time and I was determined to keep it that way. I led her by the hand to the bed and sat down leaving Bella stood in front of me. She was only a little taller than I was sat down and in the dim light of the room I studied her face. The flickering of the candles played with the shadows on her full lips and high cheekbones. My fingers traced slow, gentle patterns over her neck and she shivered, her eyes drifting shut. Her cheeks were flushed and it was creeping slowly down her chest.

I felt Bella tangle her fingers in my hair and I raised my head to meet her lips. She kissed me with a whimper and I slid my hands up her back to her shoulders. I lifted the straps of her dress slightly, "May I?" I asked.

Bella nodded breathlessly and I pushed the thin strips of fabric down her arms. Her dress pooled at her feet and for the first time Bella was naked in front of me. I sat drinking in the sight until Bella moved her hands to cover herself. It was enough to break my trance. I reached for her hands and gently pulled them away. "Don't," I whispered. I pulled her towards me and kissed the side of her breast. I hadn't known it was possible for a person to smell so truly delicious. I didn't think I would ever feel the need for food and water if I had Bella with me at all times.

Her hands were back in my hair again. When my mouth closed over one of her nipples she gasped and her hands clenched tightly. I didn't feel any pain. I was more agreeably occupied with the taste of Bella's skin. I was already hard and aching for her but I had decided not to let my body rush me. Our first time together, her first time, had been snatched and hurried and frantic. I was positive she had enjoyed it but that was not the issue. I felt a need to give her this too, specifically me. I wanted to be the man who showed her this world.

Considering what I knew of her inexperience I still couldn't find much evidence of it. Her hands were undoing my belt as I suckled her breasts, Bella was gasping but her fingers barely fumbled. I broke away from her and got to my feet to allow her to pull my robe over my head. She dropped the garment on the floor and was instantly back in my arms. For the first time her warm body pressed into mine and when she wriggled against me I groaned.

I picked her up and laid her on the bed. If I allowed her to have her way this would be over too quickly. Bella reached for me but I just smiled and shook my head. She whimpered slightly but didn't move from where I had put her.

I began a slow exploration of her body. I wanted to know her, every inch of her. My fingers trailed over her skin and my mouth followed them. When I had kissed and stroked up to her thighs Bella was squirming. She mewled in protest when I moved to her belly. I could taste the slight saltiness of her skin and it was addictive. I wouldn't be hurried. My mouth finally found her breast some minutes later and Bella sighed in relief, her eyes drifting shut.

I slid a hand between her legs gently and groaned. Bella was ready, she was warm and wet and wanting. When my fingers slid over her most sensitive spot she gasped and her eyes flew open. I was transfixed by the pleasure on her face. Knowing I was giving her this was a heady feeling, "Please...please Dominus..." she begged.

I spoke before I thought, I simply couldn't stand it. I stared into her eyes, "Bella, when we're alone together, I would like you to call me Edward." My voice came out quietly as I was breathing heavily. Considering I hadn't been touched in any way yet I didn't think I had ever wanted a woman more. "Please."

My fingers didn't stop their stroking and Bella was nodding, "Yes...Edward." I pressed my lips to hers and she gasped into the kiss. Then I was between her legs and she was looking into my eyes intently. When I finally slid inside of her I fought to keep my eyes open but I couldn't. I had to keep still for a second to stop myself from exploding inside of her. I forced my eyes open and she was still staring at me, breathing hard.

I began to move slowly and Bella's hands gripped me tightly. "Bella...you feel..."

Her fingers moved up and stroked my face, "So do you...Edward."

I didn't speed up even when my body was begging me to, even when Bella's eyes were begging me to I didn't. Every stroke inside her felt so good, I didn't want it to end. Bella was lifting her hips to meet me and her eyes still didn't leave mine. I had never felt closer to a woman, never felt so naked as I did then.

After a blissful forever Bella began to tremble, her moans were getting louder. "Edward...I..."

I moved just a little faster, I wanted to give her what she needed. As I felt her walls shake around me I groaned and fought to keep my eyes on her. I wouldn't last long and I knew it. Fortunately Bella was clutching at me desperately and I knew she was close. It was only seconds before I felt her clamp down on me, her eyes widened and she gave a low moan like, "Ohhhhhhhh..."

The sound and the feeling of her squeezing was enough to finish me. I felt as though all thought had left me forever. The only thing keeping me on the earth was Bella's brown eyes, staring fixed into mine, a look of bliss on her face.

Thought did return eventually. When it did I was pleased to find Bella still firmly in my arms. She was draped across me, her head on my chest, one of her legs thrown over mine. I heard the voice outside that had roused me, it was Eric announcing the beginning of the next hour. Had we really been here so long already? I tightened my arms around the girl on top of me and she raised her head.

Her eyes were sleepy and she gave me a beautiful smile. I pulled her up my body so I could kiss her again. She melted against me, her fingers stroked my chest in patterns and I felt myself harden. Bella jumped a little and broke the kiss. She looked down and then she giggled. It immediately brought a smile to my face, I had never heard her do that before. "Would you like to do that again, Dom...Edward?"

"Would you?" I asked still grinning at her.

"Yes, I would," she flushed. "Very much."

My hands flew to her hips, I adjusted her position a little and sat up taking her with me. Bella grabbed for my shoulders but I was holding her anyway. I lifted her and positioned myself against her, "How about something just a little different?" I asked her. Some women I knew didn't like to be on top, but something told me Bella wouldn't mind.

She nodded and sank down onto me. I gasped and it was happening all over again.

XXX

Bella was in front of me. I was curled around her back thrusting into her slowly. She reached round to touch my face and her body clenched around me for the fourth time. As before her pleasure triggered mine and our bodies stilled together. I wasn't sure if I could have moved.

I whispered her name and buried my face in her hair. Bella sighed and her fingers stroked the arm I had around her. I found myself wishing, almost praying for there to be some way for me to stay here forever. I didn't want to leave this room and be forced to return to my life. How could I? The small young woman in my arms was everything now. She had been for some time and I had been trying to ignore it. I now accepted that it would not be ignored. What I felt and why I felt it was irrelevant. She was everything and that was what mattered.

After a few minutes we heard Eric announcing the beginning of another hour. I pondered whether that could be accurate but I knew it must be. They always were. Bella wriggled around to face me. I pulled her close again, not letting her out of my grasp. "Will we have to leave soon?" She asked.

Her words seemed to echo my thoughts and I almost flinched, "I wish that we didn't have to."

Bella nodded slowly, "I wish that too." I pressed a kiss to her forehead and I felt her lips on my neck. "Would you tell me something Edward?"

"Yes, of course."

"Then tell me something. Something about you." Her brown eyes were peering at me, all curiosity.

"Well, I like blue, I don't like orange. I'm a doctor and I was in the army. I have a brother named Emmett who I love and who drives me mad in equal measure. I found out today that I am going to be an uncle. A thing that makes me oddly proud..."

Bella was giggling again, "Those are things I already know, or could guess. Except the 'uncle' part. Congratulations." She leant forward and gave me a quick kiss. "But they are just facts. Tell me something real, tell me something about your time in the army for example. Did you like it or did you hate it?"

I could have told her a hundred stories about the time I had spent in foreign countries. There were even a few I could have told her without disgusting or frightening her. But I felt something surface in my mind. She wanted a story, something real about me. I could tell her about Rosalie. I could tell her about what Emmett and Jasper and I had done for her.

I came ever so close to telling her. It wanted to come out, I wanted to be able to tell her the very worst thing I had ever done and see if she could understand. Though I knew that I couldn't. It was not just my secret after all. Instead I began to tell her of a time when an entire legion became ill with food poisoning. I thought I saw a trace of a frown on her face when I began the story but she laughed at all the right places and seemed to enjoy it.

After I had taken her one more time, Eric was making another trip down the hall and I gave a groan. "We should get home."

Bella sighed, "As you say Edward."

XXX


	5. Chapter 5

**A/N: Another Tuesday, another chapter. A few answers will be forthcoming in this one, and hopefully a few more questions will arise. **

**Thanks so much to my reviewers who have probably discovered by now that I always reply with grovelling thanks. It's just my way.**

**Shout outs to weekitty and x123 (can't reply to your reviews x123, no PMs, just so you don't think I'm leaving you out...btw were you a pre-cog in a previous life lol?). I think those two are in this for the long haul. Yay!**

**And thanks to t3r35a22, Liz2009, Kgunter34, sujari6 and vhawk730 who said nice things and encouraged me to update.**

XXX

Chapter five

My hand covered Bella's mouth as she moaned loudly and her teeth bit into my fingers. In another thrust I was emptying myself into her. Bella's hands clung to the wooden table in front of her but the rest of her body was sagging against me. "Bella, that was...wonderful." The rest of the kitchen swam into focus around me, I had to rely on my planning to keep us safe from discovery. Once I had her in my arms I always stopped thinking.

Bella was still breathing heavily, I uncurled her hands and twisted my fingers with hers. She turned her head and pressed her lips to my cheek. "It gets better every time."

Amazingly she was right. In the two weeks since our night together I had not been able to have enough of her. Barely a day had gone by that I hadn't found some way to sneak away with her if only for a few moments. Today I had told Michael to clean the stables and sent Lauren and Alice to the market. I was almost sure I had noticed a smirk on Alice's face but she had said nothing. She was a good woman.

The problem was that the time was always too short. I didn't like the snatched way we had to make love. I didn't bother to question whether that was what we were doing. I knew it. I just didn't like the way it happened.

I already had a plan to fix it. I helped Bella fix her clothes and then pulled her into my arms. It was where I wanted her all the time, "Tomorrow I am going for dinner at my brother's house. We're celebrating Rosalie's news. The next day I plan to tell Tanya I am going out with Jasper for the evening. I want you to complain of a headache and retire early." Bella's eyes were shining and she was already nodding. "We just have to make sure we're home before dawn," I said with a laugh. "I want you to myself for longer than a few minutes."

Bella bit her lip and for a second I thought she seemed close to tears. Then her mouth was on mine and she was kissing me desperately. Her hands ran down my chest and I was successfuly distracted. "How much time do we have?"

I lifted her onto the table, "Enough."

XXX

Rosalie was brought in on a carrier. She laughed, clearly pleased to see us, "I feel like a empress."

I bent down and gave her a kiss of the cheek, "You certainly look like one." She did at that. Apparently having nothing better to do gave Rosalie more time on her hair and make-up.

My mother began fussing immediately, "Oh my poor love. I had to lie-in almost from the beginning of my pregnancy with Edward. I know how difficult it can be." She clasped her daughter-in-law's hand.

"Oh it's not so bad...yet. I have a feeling it may get very boring."

Esme gave a sympathetic smile and sat down next to Rosalie, indicating that Tanya should sit on her other side. My mother always tried to include my wife and I knew Tanya appreciated it. They began to chatter immediately. Emmett and Carlisle joined me on the other sofa.

It was a habit I had noticed amongst women who had gone through a pregnancy. They tended to share and sympathise over the most excrutiating details. Even more oddly they seemed reassured by this. Perhaps it gave them hope that the process could be survived, perhaps it had to do with empathy but still...It was not a conversation I wanted any part of. From the look on Tanya's face we were in agreement for once. She felt excluded as she had not yet gone through a pregnancy. I could easily forsee another argument on the horizon.

Emmett obviously felt this was a conversation best left to women too and he turned to me, "So, how's Jasper doing? I haven't seen him since we added that door at your house."

"I shouldn't imagine you will see much of him for a while," I said nodding towards Rosalie. If she was housebound Emmett probably would be too. "How has it been so far?"

"Unexpectedly easy actually. I imagine it will not remain that way but for now all is well. She just lies in her bed and smiles a lot. I read to her or have the servants play her music. But she seems to be managing very well."

"That's good, the calmer she stays the better her condition will be," Carlisle said. "If as you say, it gets harder for her then you must do whatever you can to help."

"That's not a problem," said Emmett. He smiled over at Rosalie tenderly. As I watched him I had a sudden flash. I imagined sitting in this room across from Bella. She was radiant and big with my child. My heart fluttered in my chest at the thought. I would have loved for it to be real. Then my eyes drifted to my wife. The difference in my feelings was stark.

"Edward, are you allright son?"

I dragged myself back to the present. My father was looking at me in concern. When I looked at Emmett I could see a similar expression on his face, "Yes, I'm well."

"You seemed...well I was just asking you if you were thinking of going back to the legion? Your mother had been wondering and I promised to work it subtly into the conversation." Carlisle was smiling widely.

I returned it with as much sincerity as I could, "I don't think I will." The words were out of my mouth before I had given it any thought. There was no need for thought. It had been in the back of my mind for weeks now. If I returned to the legion I would have to leave Bella. I couldn't do that.

"Really? Esme will be so pleased." My father had never pressured me either way but his pleasure at my news was obvious. I supposed any parent would worry about their son serving in the army.

"What will I be pleased about?" My mother had apparently been aware of our conversation too.

"I have just told father that I have decided not to return to the legion." I said smiling at her. Her reaction was instantaneous.

"Oh Edward, I'm so pleased. I'm delighted."

Carlisle laughed, "See. Just as I said."

My mother rose from her seat and came over to embrace me. I held her and said softly, "You can always ask me anything. There is nothing I would conceal from you."

Esme was smiling at me lovingly when she moved back, "I know it."

"Allright, enough attention for Edward. More for me," trilled Rosalie. We all laughed with her and did as she asked. The rest of the evening was pleasant. Rosalie even voluntarily passed Tanya a plate of food and gave her a smile. It only looked slightly forced. Carlisle and Esme were delighted and Emmet's pride in his wife's condition was palpable.

I fought to ignore my wife's sour mood. I had a right to be happy, I was soon to welcome a new member of our family.

Tanya held her tongue well and was charming to all. I didn't believe in her performance at all. In the carriage on the ride home I was waited for her to begin and I wasn't disappointed. Perhaps she was waiting for me to speak first for we were only a short distance from home when she broke the silence, "Rosalie certainly seemed pleased with herself."

I sighed and reminded myself that I had known that this was inevitable. "She was polite to you all evening Tanya," I reminded her.

"Yes she always behaves herself in front of Esme. She wouldn't want to sour her mother's opinion of her." Her tone was sharp and I chanced a glance at her. Her arms were crossed over her chest and I knew for once that her complaint was not about Rosalie's treatment of her. She was simply jealous.

Reminding myself that I was the one who was behaving the worse of the two of us, I fought to keep my voice kind, "Rosalie and Esme have always been very close. They have been as mother and daughter all their lives. It is not artifice."

"Well, perhaps Esme has never met the Rosalie I know." She was glaring at me and I could feel her anger. It was almost as though I could hear her thoughts. She was angry with me. In her head this was all my fault. Why wouldn't I give the child she craved?

"Enough Tanya," I said wearily. I could give no answer to her.

She was not the kind of woman to let an argument stop like that, by the time we reached the house she was yelling at me. Her rage became tearful and incoherent. I tried to comfort her but she would have none of it. She ran ahead of me up the stairs and ordered me away.

That night when I got into bed I rolled as far away as I could from my wife. I could feel the guilt like a stone inside of me. I almost wished that I could stop going near Bella but that wasn't what I wanted. I wanted to be rid of Tanya, Bella I was in love with.

XXX

Our escape went as planned. I had spoken to Jasper and he agreed that if anyone ever asked him he would swear that we spent the evening together. He was a good friend. When I had seen him he had asked if I was in love yet. I had just looked at him and he had laughed, knowing the answer.

Eric waved us up to a free room and as soon as the door shut I pulled Bella into my arms. She kissed me back for a second but then she broke away. "Edward, can I ask you something?" I immediately dropped my hands and nodded. "I wasn't going to ask but it is weighing on my mind."

She looked worried and although I didn't know why I felt myself becoming anxious. Then I realised it was because I hated the idea of anything worrying her. "Of course."

"Is everything all right? I heard you and Tanya yelling last night and I...is there something wrong?" I flushed, I sometimes forgot that sound carried in my home. Bella shouldn't have to see or hear any of my interactions with Tanya, it was obscene. But like so many other things in my life there didn't seem to be anything I could do about it.

I tried to reassure her, "No, nothing new. It's always the same thing whenever we fight." It was no lie, it always was. Babies, my family, the unfairness of it all.

"It's not...it's not about me then? She doesn't know?" Bella was chewing on her lip and I reached out to gently free it with my thumb.

"Oh Bella, no. Tanya and I have always had a difficult time being together. She knows nothing about us." It was unlikely that she would guess either. She knew my previous position on that kind of thing.

"Difficult? Why?"

"I...it's a long story."

Bella shrugged, "You don't have to tell me if you don't want to. I'm sorry I..."

"No, it's fine. If you want to know I will tell you, but it is a long story."

"If you don't mind telling me, I would like to hear it."

I took her hand and led her to the bed. I sat down and pulled her into my lap. Bella immediately snuggled into me and was silent while I told her everything. I told her about my cousin Peter and even about his mistress Charlotte. I told her about how I had come upon Liam and Emmett discussing the matter and how I had volunteered.

When I was done Bella was frowning slightly at me, "You are a very good man Edward."

"You give me too much credit." I said with a wry chuckle.

"You sacrificed your own happiness for the happiness of people you love. It was an unselfish act." She sounded very sure and I hated to risk damaging her faith in my but I felt like I needed to be honest.

"Perhaps, but I never regretted my actions. I never felt like it cost me anything I couldn't afford to lose. I never cared very much." I stroked away the crease between her eyebrows, "Not until I met you. Doens't that make me selfish?"

"How so?" Bella's voice was breathless.

I kissed her gently, "Because if I had it to do over, I would not be able to do it. I would inflict Tanya on someone else." My heart was pounding painfully in my chest. I was dangerously close to telling her I loved her and for some reason the idea of doing so was frightening. I found I couldn't meet her eyes, "Then when I met you..."

"Don't..."

I looked to find that Bella had tears in her eyes, "Oh Bella." I pulled her closer and pressed my lips to hers. "Please don't cry." She blinked a few times and her face cleared. "Tell me something about you."

Bella looked surprised, "What would you like to know?"

"Everything," I said and I meant it too. "Tell me everything I haven't had a chance to ask you yet. Start with how you ended up in a cage at the slave market." It seemed like as good as place as any.

Bella smiled, "If you wish. To begin at the beginning, Alice and I don't know where we were born. We lived in a small village somewhere where there are mountains. I don't have a lot of memories of my life there but I remember the mountains. Alice's house was closer to them than mine and I remember the view from her window when I visited her there."

Bella paused and smiled slightly, "I remember my father, I think his name was Charles. He had a dark beard and he used to carry Alice and I around under an arm each when we were playing." Bella's face was aglow with her recollections. However little she remembered, she loved what she did.

"My mother was beautiful. She used to dance with me all the time. Alice remembers more than I do. She is four years older than me and she has told me that our families and all the others who lived nearby where closely linked; a close community." Her expression darkened, "Alice was nine when we were taken. I was only five, and I just remember the smell. When the men came who took us away they burnt the village. The hung the men and took the women and children. My mother was not taken with us. Alice says she tried too hard to fight back and they killed her. I don't remember that and I thank the god's for it."

My arms tightened around Bella. She shivered and clung to me, "I think I would have died without Alice. She had always loved me, I was her little sister in every way that mattered. She protected me from everything she could."

"How did she keep you safe from men who wanted you Bella? How did she manage that?" I had wondered about it and was glad I had finally found the courage to ask her.

"The first time a man looked at me I was ten. I was tall for my years and perhaps he mistook my age. Alice had avoided such things because she appeared younger. Anyway, she begged him not to. She was fourteen and she was determined to protect me."

Even though I knew how the story had turned out it still made me feel ill. The idea of Bella at such a young age being handled by a man was nauseating. "How did she manage to?"

"Alice has always been good at thinking quickly. She offered herself to the man." Bella's eyes had drifted out of focus and I knew she was remembering the day. I imagined the imp and her zeal to protect her friend. I could imagine how persuasive she could have been, "She told him my age and hers and promised him she wouldn't fight him. Perhaps he liked her once he looked at her closely, perhaps he just wanted a willing woman." Bella shuddered.

"The end was that he agreed. He never laid a hand on me from that day until the day you bought us. I didn't really understand what was happening at the time and I just let Alice take charge, like I had so many other times. Once I was old enough to understand I tried to help her...I offered to let James have me too so that he would not touch her so often. She absolutely refused. She said that there was reason to let him have both of us. Why should he?"

"You were with the same slave trader for so long?" I asked surprised.

"Yes, we lost count of the years. I am either twenty one or twenty two."

My mouth dropped open and I was amazed that I had never asked these things before. I had not had a lot of opportunities but it made me feel bad that I had not tried harder. After all I had managed to find time to bed her. I realised her words meant that they had been with the same trader for more than fifteen years. I had never heard of such a thing. Slaves were to be sold so that profit could be made from them. It was a very odd situation.

"Was the trader cruel to you?" I asked. I was becoming a little distracted, Bella had planted a kiss on my cheek and was now working her way down to my neck.

"Not really. Alice tried to escape with me once and I was whipped. But other than that no." Bella's voice paused often as she kissed me. "We were kept in a separate cage near to his wagon. We were only put out at the front when I took ill." She kissed my mouth this time, her tongue touching my lip gently.

Bella wriggled and was suddenly on top of me. We both heard Eric's voice announcing the passing of another hour. I was beginning to hate it. Every hour that passed was another hour I didn't have with Bella ahead of me. I slid my fingers under her dress and stroked her flesh. If I had limited time I would make the best of it.

XXX

Bella lay dozing in my arms. I had heard Eric four times and I knew it must be almost midnight. I stroked my fingers over her skin again and again. Sometimes she would sigh and arch her body into my touch. I didn't want to wake her, I would spend all night watching her sleep and gladly pay full price as before.

My pleasure doubled when I heard her mumble my name in her sleep. Her small hands gripped the sheets and she smiled happily. My heart ached with how much I loved her and it was still getting worse. Every time I was with her I felt more strongly about her, and every time I had to leave her side it hurt a little more. How many more nights could I do this and still continue on with my normal life?

Not one person was getting what they wanted out of this. I was miserable, Bella deserved better than to be someone's whore regardless of how I felt about her and Tanya...Well I had enough affection in me to know that she deserved better too. She deserved to find someone who loved her like I loved Bella. Everyone deserved it and I was appalled that I had once given so little consideration to it.

I knew now why I had not told Bella how I felt for her. If I told her and she didn't feel the same way about me it would hurt. I knew that the pain would cripple me. Nothing would ever mean as much as she did and I would never be able to replace her, even if I wanted to. If she did feel as I did then I would be forced to action. I would have to do something about the situation.

I wasn't sure which alternative was worse but I selfishly wished for the second. It would ruin a lot of things and hurt a lot of people but I wanted it anyway. I pulled Bella into my arms and she stirred. She turned and gave me one of her brilliant smiles. "Did I fall asleep?"

"Only for a little while," I said softly and pulled her in for a kiss.

XXX

I hadn't managed to speak to Emmett alone in a while. My visits to Rosalie were still happening daily and so there should have been ample opportunity. It was just that it was difficult to pry him away from Rosalie without being obvious. I had questioned telling my brother at all. He and Rosalie told each other everything but I hoped I could depend on his discretion. Such as it was.

One afternoon when Rosalie was well into her fourth month and I had stayed for lunch, he walked me to the front door. He had not done so yet and I wasn't sure why he had today but I was glad of it. Once we were out of earshot of Rosalie I turned to Emmett, he also turned to me and we said at the same moment, "Brother..."

We both chuckled and I waved my hand indicating that he was welcome to speak first. "Brother I wanted to pay you something. These visits must cut into the time you can spend with other patients. Patients who are paying."

"Emmett, thank you for the offer, but if you make it again I will hit you." I gave him a stern look. "Unless you want paying for the door you helped me with."

Emmett chuckled, "All right. Fair enough. What were you going to ask me?"

I glanced nervously towards Rosalie's room even though I knew there was no way she could hear, "I need to discuss something with you. But first I need you to swear to keep this in absolute confidence."

Emmett nodded immediately, "Of course brother."

"You understand that I mean little Rose too? I don't like to keep things from her but this must be kept." Since childhood our confidences had always been a four way thing. Jasper being the fourth. We had only ever kept one secret from Rosalie collectively and she knew the truth anyway. She just loved us all too much to bring it up.

Emmett frowned and I knew he was battling with himself. He wanted to help me but he didn't like the conditions. Finally he nodded again, "You have my word."

Emmett led me into their main room and I sank heavily into a chair. Once I had a cup of wine in my hand and the servants had been dismissed I told my story. Emmett's eyes widened in surprise more than once in the telling. He seemed almost disbelieving when I told him I had had one of my slaves. Then indignant when I told him that Jasper already knew. When I admitted that I had fallen in love with her the colour actually drained from his face. "I've never been in love Emmett, why did you never mention that it is actually a form of hell?"

"I guess it can be. I remember how I felt when I thought I might have to marry Tanya. It feels..."

"Perverse. That's how it feels to me. I don't feel as though I am betraying Tanya by being with Bella. I feel as though I am betraying Bella because I have a wife."

Emmett looked pained, "I'm sorry Edward. I truly am. It isn't fair that you should feel this way when..."

I had thought it myself but I didn't really feel it. I wouldn't wish this kind of pain on anyone, especially not my brother. "Life isn't fair. It was the best decision at the time, I know that and there is no blame here. I just don't know what it is to be done."

Emmett shrugged his massive shoulders, the pained look not leaving his face. "I...I don't know. I wish I could help you but I just don't know."

I sank back in my seat. "That's what I thought. I've considered asking Tanya how she feels about a divorce, but I know that the Denali's would be furious."

"Edward, if that's what you choose to do, you know we will do whatever we can to help."

I had never doubted it, I nodded, "You will, mother and father and Rose of course. But what of everyone else?"

Emmett shrugged, "Does it matter?"

I considered that and I was surprised by how easily my honest answer came. "No, I don't think it does. This...this feeling is not getting easier to bear. I...I think it's just a matter of time."

"Just out of curiosity, why is it so important that this be kept from Rose?"

"I'm just envisioning future fights with Tanya. Until I have this situation under control I don't want to risk tempers getting the better of them."

"You might have good reason to be worried." Emmett conceded with a grin.

XXX

I could hear the yelling before I got to my front door. I didn't even dare to hope that it wasn't coming from my house. It was almost becoming a routine and I would know Tanya's shriek anywhere. I wondered if someone had damaged one of her dresses. I pushed open the door in a resigned way but I was horrified by what I saw. Tanya was standing in the middle of the courtyard with a horsewhip in her hand. Her face was twisted into an angry snarl.

Michael was there too, he was standing near to the stables and there in his grip, squirming like a fish was Alice. Michael had a disgusted look on his face and I could see he was trying to hide it. He was evidently having some trouble holding onto her and I could tell he was being careful not to hurt her. As far as I was concerned that expression saved him from a beating.

On second glance I could see Lauren cowering in the kitchen doorway. She looked as horrified as I felt, her hands were clasped over her mouth and her eyes were wide with fear. The whole tableau was awful. No one seemed to have noticed my entrance and Tanya was advancing on Alice. The odd thing was that Alice didn't seem to care about my wife, all her energy was directed at freeing herself. Whether Alice cared or not, I couldn't let it happen.

"Stop!" I bellowed and everyone froze. The four people in the courtyard turned to stare at me with various expressions from fear to delighted relief. "Release her immediately," I said striding over to Alice and Michael. He released his hold but I was already upon them. Alice crumpled painfully to her knees and I hit Michael hard around the face. But not too hard. I knew he had only been following my wife's orders.

The point needed to be made however, "You will never put your hands on my servants. I thought I had made myself quite clear on that point. I am the Dominus in this house."

"You did Dominus. I'm sorry." His expression was terrified and despite my anger I softened my tone an iota.

"Take Lauren into the kitchen and both of you have a cup of wine. Calm yourselves a little." As I spoke I leant down and pulled Alice to her feet. Michael quickly scurried off and I turned to face Tanya. She was staring at me expressionless.

Alice clutched my arm, "Please Dominus. Bella's gone."

"Gone?" I asked, not even trying to mask my horror, "Explain."

"Domina sent her to the market by herself. We were in the kitchen cleaning up after lunch and preparing dinner. Then Domina called her out." Alice turned an accusatory stare on Tanya.

"Is this true? You sent one of the girls to the market, alone with only a few hours light left?" I asked, even I could hear the seething rage in my voice.

"I wanted some saffron and the others were busy," Tanya said sullenly.

"I tried to go after her but she wouldn't let me." Alice was staring at Tanya with hatred in her face. It might have concerned me but for the sick feeling of worry that was starting to build in my chest.

"And then she..." Tanya hissed.

"Silence!" I had to fight not to completely lose my temper. "Alice, go to your room. Tanya, if you lay a hand on this girl I will give you worse. Get in the house." Normally Tanya would have argued but I think even she was disturbed by the anger on my face.

I turned to Alice, "I will bring her home. On Juno's stone I will."

Alice nodded and hurried away. I went straight back out to Seth and was away in seconds. The frustrating thing was that I couldn't be sure which route Bella had taken. I could only chose the most likely and hope for the best.

I was suddenly furious with the woman I loved. Logically I knew that Bella had no real choice but to obey Tanya. Emotionally I was in agony. I tried to comfort myself that Bella was probably fine and would smile at my concern. She would squeeze my hand subtly and I would feel whole again but it didn't seem true. I was convinced that Bella was in danger and frantic to find her.

When I reached the market, I handed Seth over to one of the boys and began searching for her on foot. Remembering what Tanya had said I fought my way over to the spice merchants. I searched for a glimpse of her face or her shining hair, but I couldn't see her.

It was possible that she hadn't gotten to the market yet and that she had taken a different route to get there. The light was starting to fail and the merchants were packing up. Their was movement everywhere. I was spinning in circles peering at the crowds of people when I caught sight of something familiar. It was not Bella. It was Laurent, the man from whom I had bought Bella and Alice. He was standing in the mouth of an alleyway across the market from me.

He was watching the crowds just as I had been. His face was tense and his eyes darted nervously around. I moved towards him slowly trying to melt into the milling masses. Later I couldn't rationalize it to myself. It just seemed to be an odd coincidence that I should see the man from whom I had bought Bella, when I was searching for her. Laurent disappeared back down the alley but I wasn't concerned. It was a dead end, one of the few around here. I had grown up in the city and was familiar with its layout.

When I was half way across the market, Laurent reappeared. There were two men with him and between them was Bella. Her face was white and tense. One of the men had a grip on her arm and was steering her away from me. I began to fight my way forward. All I could see was the hand on her arm and I wanted to rip it off.

I pulled a small dagger out of the sheath on my hip. I never went out completely unarmed though I wished I had something bigger now. Still, no one would see this until it was entering their flesh. Which it would if a hair on her head had been damaged.

I was closing in when they moved down the next alley and disappeared from view. I shoved people aside and heard loud protestions behind me. I vaguely hoped that I hadn't knocked anyone to the ground but it was not my chief concern at the moment.

I was in the alley only a few seconds after Bella and her escorts. I could still see them at the other end and I yelled loudly, "Good day citizen." My shout was enough to distract them. The three men all turned to look at me. I was within a few feet of them, "That is my slave. Be good enough to hand her over." Bella was gazing at me in wonder and relief. Her pale skin was drawn and I noticed blood at the corner of her mouth. I was angry all over again. Laurent was looking anxiously from me to Bella.

One of the other men, the one with his hand on Bella, gave a laugh, "Sorry, the boss wants her back. We've got our orders."

"I will not ask you twice and I will not let you take her." I said quietly and I took another step towards them.

The laughing man laughed again. He let go of Bella and walked towards me quite calmly. He was bigger than I was, but I had grown up fighting Emmett, and I was a soldier. As soon as his hand reached out to grab me, I buried my blade in his unprotected side. His size and strength made him arrogant. I was a doctor and I knew that my aim was true. This would-be kidnapper had a hole in his lung. He would be dead in five minutes if he was lucky. If he was unlucky he might last a whole day. I thought of the blood on Bella's face and his grip on her arm and I twisted the dagger.

The man immediately sank to his knees, he was not a threat anymore. My eyes moved to the other man and Laurent. I was wondering which of them would attack first when the unknown man turned and fled. Laurent watched him go, horrified and then made to run too. I threw myself forwards and we both crashed to the ground.

Laurent struggled until he felt my blade pressed against his back, "Get up." I growled. "Slowly."

He made an odd noise, it brought to mind a mouse being trodden on. Laurent struggled to his feet and I was aware that Bella was behind me. She was probably terrified and I knew she needed me, but first I needed to resolve something, "What is this all about Laurent?" I asked in his ear.

The man clearly had no loyalty in him. I didn't even have to press the dagger to his skin for him to start talking, "It was James."

"James?"

"The trader," said Bella startling me. Her voice was surprisingly calm. I had an even stronger sense of respect for her.

"He beat me terribly for selling them. He said they were his and not for sale. He said everyone knew that. But I didn't know. I had only been there a few days and I didn't know. Then he said I had to get them back." I was still angry, but my anger was not directed at the pitiful man before me. It had switched it's focus to the mysterious James.

My eyes flickered to Bella, I couldn't keep them away anymore. I thought of what might have happened to her today and I pressed the dagger harder against Laurent, "Why did you take her into that alley?"

"We were just trying to get away. We didn't know there was no way out." The man at my feet was whimpering. I glanced at Bella again and she nodded, she even flashed me a small smile and it was like I could read her thoughts. I felt as though she was mocking the men who had tried to take her and I smiled back.

"How did you know she was here?" I thought I knew but I had my suspicions confirmed by him.

"We've been watching your house. We followed and waited until she was apart from the crowds. She's always been with one we didn't know so we couldn't take her then."

I took the blade away from Laurent's spine and glanced at the man on the floor. He was still alive but fading fast. "Get out of here," I hissed at Laurent. He did not need to be told twice. He ran from me as fast as he could and was out of sight in seconds.

Then for the first time I was able to turn to Bella and pull her into my arms. She clung to me and kissed my neck but I was surprised to see her face was dry of tears. I spent a few minutes just holding her and reassuring myself that she was safe. She pulled back a little and kissed me. I held her tighter against my body and when her tongue stroked against mine I groaned. "I wish we could go to Eric's but Alice is frantic at home."

"She is?"

"She was worried about you coming to the market alone and apparently she had good reason." I stroked my fingers over her cheek, checking her for damage, "Did they hurt you?"

Bella shook her head, "No. It's barely even painful." I kissed the corner of her mouth gently.

"We should go." I took her hand and guided her back through the market. She kept close to me and I when I got up behind her on my horse she leant her body against mine softly. My hand wound round her waist and I pulled her tighter. I wanted to press my lips to her neck but I stopped myself. I was in the middle of the market after all. Instead I clicked at Seth and he started for home.

I was fighting to keep a semblance of calm in place for Bella. Inside I was writhing in fury. Someone had tried to take Bella from me and the rage was overwhelming. Add to that I couldn't help but picture a young Alice, forced to lie beneath a man to protect the child-Bella. I would not allow her to be hurt anymore, not either of them.

I cleared my throat and squeezed Bella a little, "I must say, I'm impressed by how calmly you took all that. You hardly seemed afraid at all." Even before she had seen me, she hadn't seemed terrified.

Bella shrugged slightly, "I thought you might come for me."

"There should have been no 'might' in that thought Bella. Of course I would come for you." I didn't know how she could think otherwise. I would have moved heaven and earth to get her back.

Bella didn't reply. She just pressed herself a little more firmly against me.

XXX

My front door was ajar when we reached home and I wandered if Tanya had stormed out. She had a habit of doing that when she was angry with me. When we got near I spotted a small dark head sticking out of the gap. As soon as Bella dismounted Alice had her in her arms. I watched the affectionate scene with a smile.

Alice pulled away and began to examine Bella in much the same way as I had; checking for any damage. Bella interrupted her by grabbing Alice's hand tightly, "He wants you back Ali," she said.

"What?" Alice asked confused.

"James, he wants you back."

Alice's confusion switched to horror and I decided it was time to join the conversation, "Three of James' men tried to abduct Bella at the market. One of them I killed, one of them ran and the other, Laurent I let go." My brain noted that Alice was not surprised that I knew of her history with the trader.

"You let him go?" Alice's voice was not accusatory, merely curious.

"I don't know if the one who fled will go back to James. I want someone to tell him that I know what he tried to do." I was proud of how even my voice was.

"Alec ran, Felix died." Bella told Alice and I realised that she had known them. I wondered if they had ever hurt the girls before.

Alice stroked Bella's hair gently, "I'm so sorry he tried to take you."

"Not you're fault," said Bella firmly. "He's clever. He uses how much we love each other against us. He always has."

"Bella's right Alice. There is no blame on you. None, I say so and I'm the Dominus remember?"

Alice let out a hiccoughing laugh but it was a laugh none the less, "I should have known it was too good to be true."

I reached for her arm, "Alice, I will not let this man get you back. I will not let him hurt either of you."

"You can't stop him," she whispered. "He buys the loyalty of the people he needs with money and women. He is powerful for a slave trader." The laughter had faded from her voice, now she just sounded defeated.

It made me so angry and sad at the same time, "Alice, I know I asked for your trust once and I let you down. This time I will not. You two will not leave the house until further notice. I will get help if need be, but the situation will be resolved. I swear it."

Bella was gazing at me her thanks obvious, Alice still looked unsure but I could tell that she wanted to believe me. I smiled at them both and called for Michael to take Seth off my hands.

XXX

I checked over Bella and Alice. Of the two Alice was, surprisingly, the worst one. She had struggled against Michael so hard that she had almost dislocated her shoulder. Now the joint was aching and she winced every time she moved. I apologised again for my wife's behaviour and told Alice not to do anything that might strain it for at least a few days.

I was reluctant to leave the two girls; their company was infinitely preferable to what was awaiting me upstairs but I knew I had to go. I had to have yet another fight with Tanya. She hadn't come back downstairs since I had returned with Bella and I found her on the bed pretending to sleep. "I know you're awake."

Tanya seemed to fight the urge for a second but then she opened her eyes and glared at me, "That little witch struck me Edward. How could you side with her?"

I had thought to keep this as calm as possible and already she was determined to make it difficult. My temper was already hanging by a thread, "Why did she strike you Tanya?"

"Because I tried to stop her disobeying me," she replied haughtily.

"You deliberately sent her friend into danger. Alice was frightened and it turns out she was right. I had to retrieve Bella from the clutches of several men." This was as much Tanya's fault as that of the men. She had carelessly endangered Bella's life.

"Well, how was I to know that?" Tanya waved a hand as though to say the matter was of little importance. It did nothing for my mood.

"You didn't know, but you didn't care either. You know the rules I have in place and that they are for everyone's safety. Now one of our slaves was almost kidnapped and another has damage to her arm. Are you satisfied? Are you pleased with yourself?" I could hear my voice getting louder but I didn't seem to be able to quiet it.

"Why do you care so much Edward? What is so special about them? You bought them on a whim and since you have been devoted to them. You can't give them enough attention, you can't be kind enough to them. They have new clothes and as much food as they want and..."

"I bought them all new clothes Tanya. Lauren included and I have never limited my slave's food. You are making excuses..."

"Michael didn't get new clothes," said Tanya petulantly.

"Michael displeased me recently, in a way I don't wish to discuss, so he got nothing." Tanya threw up her hands and pulled the sheet over her head. I was in no mood for her games today and dragged it off her body. She sat up and opened her mouth but I held up a hand. "Tanya, I have told you once and I am going to tell you again. I discipline the servants in this house, not you."

"She struck..."

"Quiet," I hissed. "I have now told you twice and I will not tell you a third time. If I see you about to strike one them again, there will be consequences."

"One of the girls..."

"Any of them," I said finally yelling. "I have never beaten a slave, they would have to do something terrible to warrant it. I will not have my wife doing something like that. And I will not repeat myself again."

I could see that Tanya would like to continue this argument but I rarely yelled at her. I could feel how flushed my face was and I knew I probably looked out of my mind and I didn't care. I had had enough. I felt as though I was being pulled in too many different directions and somewhere in the middle I was fracturing.

Tanya was just staring at me. "I have things to do," I said abruptly. Then I turned on my heel and left the room. I gave Michael a message, grabbed Seth's reins and was about to leave the house when Alice appeared at my elbow. Michael gave me a bow and scuttled out the door, barely even glancing at Alice.

She was biting her lip and looking more nervous than I had ever seen her, "Dominus, I have to tell you...I know what you're going to do, at least I think I do..."

"What is it Alice?" I asked gently. I didn't bother to deny anything, whatever she thought I was sure I was planning something worse.

"James, he's dangerous. Truly he is. He..." Alice bit her again for a second, "He likes pain...and girls. He knew how old Bella was the first time...he just saw potential in me. He thought he could keep me as a little girl and I...I let him." There were tears rolling down her face but when I reached for her she held up her hands in defence, as though she was afraid I would hurt her. I felt my heart clench in my chest.

"I'm only telling you this, because I want you to understand. He's powerful for a slave trader. He's bought a lot of support in Rome. If you make him angry he wont stop until he's destroyed you."

I couldn't imagine what Alice had suffered at the hands of this man and it made me angry. I was angry that something like that had happened, angry that it had almost happened to Bella as well and I was more than angry that James was trying to get them back. "He didn't destroy you." I said.

Alice shrugged as though the answer was obvious, "I had Bella to protect."

Under all the rage I felt a brief surge of affection for this girl, "Well, now I will protect both of you."

Alice smiled but it was still weak, "Don't tell Bella. She would feel worse."

"You don't think she can handle it?" I asked

"I don't want her to have to. No one should. I would much rather not have to. I always told her that he had gotten to like me; that he was gentle. She felt bad enough anyway. Why make it worse? To what purpose?" I saw the wisdom in her words and nodded my agreement without a twinge. This was not my secret after all.

"I have to go now. I might be late back."

Alice nodded, "Just please remember what I said. And be careful."

"I will." I gave her as cheerful a smile as I could manage, "Michael will be back soon with someone. Lock the door once they're here."

XXX


	6. Chapter 6

**A/N Okay, this chapter kind of got away from me. I ended up running behind it; screaming for it to stop but it just wouldn't. I hope no one gives up half way through lol, because there's quite a lot in it. I have never tried to write this kind of action before so I hope I've done all right. All opinions are welcome, (just please don't throw anything at me).**

**And thank you to everyone who reviewed. I am amazed that so many people took the time.**

**Special thanks to weekitty and x123 who never leave me hanging, to LizS2009 and sujari6 who dislike Tanya as much as I do, to t3r35a22 and Kgunter34 who are always so nice to me and to mayi84 who knows Edward always kicks James' arse (yes I'm English), till it's a whole new shape.**

**A quick nod to HollyLouise, the first one to tell me she was up until the small hours reading this. I got an all-nighter!**

**And an apology to vhawk730 and TwilightSVU who both tried to persuade me to update sooner. I would have loved to, I wanted to, but this beast of a chapter would not be contained.**

XXX

Chapter six

I was pacing Jasper's main room waiting for Emmett. My friend was trying everything to calm me and so far it was making absolutely no difference. I didn't want water, I didn't want wine and I didn't want anything stronger. No, I didn't think we should get some air and I didn't want to smoke. I wanted my brother to get here so I could start doing something about James. I wanted it to involve pain. Jasper wanted to know what had happened, but I was only going to tell this story once, then I was going to do something about it.

Every time I blinked I saw Bella being dragged away with blood on her face and so I paced. After what seemed like an eternity there was one knock on the foor. Then it was pushed open and my large brother was framed in the entryway, "What's happened?" He asked immediately.

Jasper was all attention too, "Do you remember the man we bought Bella and Alice and Jacob from?"

"Jacob should be at your house by the way, I sent him straight back with Michael. And yes I do recall the man, Laurent?"

I nodded, "Well, a little while ago I found him and and two other men dragging Bella away from the market. Apparently their boss, a man names James, has a special interest in Alice and he wants her back."

"Alice? The little fiery one? Why would he want her back?" Jasper asked.

"James kept Bella and Alice for a very long time. He's been raping Alice since she was fourteen. Bella was his leverage, she ensured Alice's compliance." I gave a very humourless laugh, "It's why Bella had never been touched."

Both Jasper and Emmett had disgusted looks on their faces now. Then Emmett looked at me in concern, "Is Bella well? She wasn't harmed?"

"Nothing she won't recover from." I threw up my hands and resumed my pacing. "But curse them to Dis I almost lost her. If I hadn't found her in time..."

"How did you?" Jasped asked.

"I was looking for her anyway. Tanya had sent her to the market alone, against my instructions, and I was worried. It was just luck." I ran my hands through my hair. I hated the idea of how close it had been.

I felt Jasper clap me on the back even though I hadn't heard him move, "What do you want to do? Is it worth going to the law with this? Stealing slaves is a crime after all."

I gave a humourless laugh, "I considered it. According to Alice the man is powerful in local circles. She said that he had bought a lot of support. But I don't know if we're talking about money or slaves." I knew I was starting to ramble and forced my mouth closed.

Everyone was silent for a few minutes, but Emmett was the one to break it, "We can't know what to do until we're there."

I appreciated that Emmett didn't even question the necessity to go there and do something. I glanced at Jasper and saw that he was nodding. "We have to go in blind; I don't see another choice."

I had been cursing the gods a lot today but now I thanked them for my brothers. They would do anything for me, just as I would for them. "Thank you." I said quietly.

Jasper got to his feet, "When?"

"The sun's already down. I don't know what time the market closes or what time James leaves for the night."

Emmett got to his feet too, "We should go now."

XXX

We could only see two men moving around the slave market from our position across the road. One of them I identified as Alec from the market, I actually felt Jasper grip my arm when I saw him and I realised I had taken a step forward. The other man I didn't recognise and I didn't see Laurent anywhere. I wished I had thought to ask Alice for a description of James. The gates had already been closed for the night and I didn't know the best thing to do.

Alec reappeared with a large bucket, he began shoving food into the cages and Emmett solved my problem for me, "Follow my lead." He had always been the most impulsive one of us. Eventually the waiting just got to be too much for him. He started across the road leaving Jasper and I to catch up to him. Emmett was over the gates in a second and by then we were right behind him.

I had no idea what his plan was, I was just pleased that it was time to do something. I hoped that the something would end with me getting my hands on James. I got a general idea when Alec spun around and found himself face to face with a very agressive looking Emmett. My brother grabbed Alec by the front of his tunic and forced the smaller man to the ground.

Alec noticed me and looked more horrfied than before, "I just did as I was told...I have to..."

Emmett shook Alec gently, for him, and Alec's teeth rattled, "Quiet," he hissed. "The man here with you, is that James?"

Alec turned pale and his mouth dropped open. Emmett shook him again, less gently, "No, no, that's not James."

I was on my knee next to him, "Where is he?" Alec's eyes were shifting around and I knew he was trying to think of a lie, "Tell me," I said and pulled out the blade I had used that afternoon on his friend. I was armed with larger weapons now but I thought the poetry would probably not be lost on him, "Or I will open your throat."

For effect I pressed the dagger against his neck. Alec whimpered, "He said he..."

"Hey!" A loud exclamation behind us caught all our attention. The other man we had seen was approaching us.

Jasper walked towards him calmly, "I don't want to hurt you." The man pulled a knife out of his waistband and Jasper shook his head as though very disappointed.

Utterly confident in Jasper's ability to handle the man I turned my attention back to Alec. He had been watching Jasper too and flinched when he felt the knife under his chin again, "He's not going to help you. Answer me."

Alec hesitated still and pushed beyond all patience I dragged the blade across his throat, just enough to cut the skin. Alec gasped and struggled, "Alright, alright. He said he'd do the job himself." He was still squirming while he talked, "He said he would get them back himself."

I looked at Emmett and I knew his expression of horror probably matched mine. We hadn't seen anyone leave. That meant that James was already ahead of us. Way ahead.

"How many?" Asked Emmett shaking the man so hard that his head rocked.

"He took Laurent with him. The whole things was Laurent's mistake so..."

I was on my feet in a second and running. I could hear Emmett and Jasper calling my name but I barely heard them. I ran until I reached the tavern outside of which I had tied Seth. I struggled with the knot for several agonsing seconds before I managed to undo it.

I was urging Seth faster before he was fully onto the road. I yelled warnings to people ahead of me, though as it was now full dark people were mostly clustered near buildings. I was trying not to imagine what might await me at home. How long had James been there? Had Jacob been able to assist Michael in protecting my home as I had hoped he might? I felt the urge to vomit as I imagined James in my house with Bella and Alice.

I vaguely wondered how far Emmett and Jasper were behind me but it wasn't something that seemed very important. It didn't change what I needed to do either way. Seth turned almost automatically onto the road that led to my home. He seemed to feel the urgency in me and he sought to help.

I never had more cause to be grateful to an animal in my life. Before I even became aware of my own front door I saw the movement outside of it. There were two horses tied up there and one of the horses had a man stood next to it.

I was planning as I neared them. I didn't recognise the man next to the horse. He had long blond hair that was tied back and so I had to assume it was James. Then everything started to happen very quickly. James turned to see who was arriving at such speed just as Laurent emerged from my door. When James turned I could see Alice on his horse in front of him. She was laid across the animal, clearly unconscious. From that point on, everything I saw seemed to be tinted red. The thought of these men entering my house was sickening.

Seth was clattering to a halt and I was already on my feet as James was trying to mount his horse. I caught the leg he was swinging over and dragged him back with as much strength as I could muster. Given my rage at that moment I was able to summon a lot. James tumbled backwards off the horse and landed four feet away on his shoulders. He grunted painfully as he landed and from his rush of breath I knew I had bought myself a few seconds.

I span around to face Laurent. It was only then I noticed that he was dragging Bella's limp body behind him. Any pity I had for the man, which might have stemmed from the cruelty of his master and his obvious unwillingness, vanished then and there.

I launched myself forward. Laurent dropped Bella immediately and held up his hands as though in surrender. I was not mollified. All his action accomplished was that Bella hit the floor hard. I gave a cry of rage and unsheathed Jasper's sword. Laurent was too shocked to even try and stop me. I doubted it would have made a difference. The sword was buried in his gut before he had time to draw breath and his eyes widened. He looked down at where his body had been pierced as though he couldn't believe it had happened.

I pulled the weapon free and turned my back on him without a second thought. I knelt at Bella's side and was reaching out to check her heart when voices called out behind me. They were voices that I would know anywhere and I turned to them. I didn't see my brother and Jasper, what I saw was James back on his feet with a sword in his hand. He looked desperate. It was a look I had seen on men's faces before and it rarely boded well.

"You shouldn't have come here James." I said and even I could hear the growl in my voice. It was a stupid thing to have done no matter how he viewed it. He might have bought support in Rome but my family was known and powerful. Adding to that Tanya's presence and the insult to the Denali's, his actions seemed like suicide.

I could only conclude that he was mad or obsessed with Alice and Bella. Neither possibility helped me in dealing with him. He smirked at me but it seemed forced. Jasper and Emmett were almost upon us, "I knew you wouldn't let me replace them with others. If I thought this could be settled honourably I would have done it, but you wouldn't have let me."

My brother was the first off his horse, "Check on the girls." Jasper was already doing as I asked, he was pulling Alice off the horse. I could see James watching him with gritted teeth, "You're right, I won't. I bought them and they are mine."

James laughed, "That's not why though. You forget, I've been watching you. You're just like me. You want them as badly as I do."

I knew it was a ridiculous comparison but the idea made me angrier still, "There is one difference between you and me."

"What's that?" He asked with raised eyebrows.

"I have them, you don't."

James snarled and swung his sword towards me. I defended against it easily enough but Emmett was not impressed. He was suddenly at my side and beyond. James was ready for him, but he was not expecting Jasper to launch himself forward at the same time. Jasper grasped the hand that held the sword and bent the point away from Emmett easily.

James gasped at the pain in his wrist and his body tried to follow and relieve it. The distraction was perfectly timed and while I was still standing there with my sword in my hand Emmett had slid his own into James neck. It pierced through the skin at the juncture of his neck and shoulder, Emmett put some force behind the hilt and I felt as though I could see the blade's progress.

It went straight down from his neck and into his chest. It severed everything necessary for the heart on its way and as Emmett removed his sword I knew that James had a matter of seconds to live. He was gasping in absolute horror, there was blood on his hands from his wound and from his mouth. I watched him fall sideways still gasping...and I felt no regret.

Though, I momentarily wished I had done it myself. It wasn't a question of pride, I was just sorry that Emmett had blood on his hands because of me. That was literal blood, on his hands and all over his robes. As though I had spoken outloud Emmett looked straight at me. "I finally feel as though we are even." James lay on the ground forgotten.

We held each other's gaze for a second before I spoke, "You never owed me anything, Emmett."

"And you owe me the same now. Understood?" I nodded and Emmett smiled grimly at me.

Then I turned to Bella. Emmett hadn't had time to move her and she was still lying much as James was. I was disturbed by the comparison and I lifted her gently into my arms. Bella whimpered and although it sounded as though she was in pain I was just pleased to hear her make a sound. I actually gasped with relief and I held her close to my face. She still smelled as wonderful as ever.

While I had my nose buried in her hair my eyes fell on Alice and I felt horribly guilty. Jasper had lain her down much as Bella had been and I moved over to her side. It seemed as though kneeling with Bella in my arms was going to be difficult but Jasper saved the day again by moving over and lifting her easily. "Shall we take them back inside?" He asked.

Emmett was sheathing his sword and getting to his feet, "I need to go and notify the local magistrate. This actually couldn't have worked out better."

"How exactly is that?" I asked and I couldn't keep the indignation out of my voice.

"If we had been forced to kill James at the market things could have become complicated. Now he has come to your house and tried to abduct your slaves. Added to that, he then crept up behind you with a sword in his hand. We are well within our rights here. There should be no trouble."

"Well, that's good then," and it was good. I was just having difficulty seeing it that way at the moment with Bella in my arms unconscious having been subjected to two kidnap attempts in one day.

Emmett apparently noticed my reaction because he smiled and took his leave. "We should get them into bed," I said to Jasper.

He nodded and followed me as I pulled the door open with my foot. The torches were lit inside and again I froze at an unpleasant scene in my own courtyard. Michael was sprawled across the table. There was blood on his forehead from a cut I could see there, but other than that he seemed unharmed. He was breathing at any rate. "Edward," said Jasper.

I turned and followed his line of sight. Jacob was on the floor of my stables. There was blood on his robes but I couldn't see where it had come from. He was breathing too. I gave Jasper a look and he followed me swiftly into the servant's quarters. I kicked open the door of Alice's room for him and then took Bella to her bed. I laid her down gently and made to stand but her fingers clutched reflexively at my arms. "Edward..."

"I'm here Bella," I replied even though I knew she was still mostly unconscious. I knelt by the side of her bed and stayed within her grasp. I stroked my fingers through her hair soothingly. Now that I had seen James' body lying in the road I was feeling remarkably calm. Bella was safe and Alice with her and that was enough for now. Compared to my earlier feelings I was almost buoyant.

My good mood almost slipped when my fingers touched a lump on the side of Bella's head. She flinched when my fingers ran over it and I lightened my touch. After a thorough examination I comforted myself that it was not so bad and could have been a lot worse.

There was a knock on the connecting door between the two bedrooms and after a moment's pause Jasper pushed it open, "I'm sorry Edward, but I don't think I'll be able to keep her in bed if she doesn't see Bella for herself." He stepped to the side as he spoke and I could see Alice sat up in bed. One of her hands was on the wall and the other was against the back of her head.

I got to my feet and went to check her over. Her face was pinched and pale and I could tell that she had been hit at least as hard as Bella. Alice looked a little nauseated. "Alice, can you follow my finger with your eyes?" She did as I asked though she was still screwing her face up as though she was in pain. "Jasper..." My voice trailed off. I was about to ask him to go and get some willow tea from Lauren, but it had just occured to me that I didn't know where Lauren was.

"Alice," I said quickly, "I have to go and check on the others and I will need Jasper's help." She nodded but didn't speak so I pointed to the open door, "Bella is just sleeping like you were. If she wakes up call for me." Alice just nodded again and I was starting to get concerned. "Are you all right? Do you need anything?" She shook her head. I didn't want to leave her and especially not Bella, but I couldn't just leave Jacob and Michael out in the courtyard. "We won't be far, we can hear you if you shout."

I was almost out of the door and Jasper was right behind me when finally, she spoke, "He'll come back you know, he won't let us go. He won't stop..." Suddenly she was crying, her shoulders were shaking with sobs and Jasper was leaving my side.

He was knelt by her bed and taking her hand gently before I had time to move. She peered at him through her tears but she didn't seem sorry he was there, "Alice, he is never coming for you or Bella again. James is dead. He died minutes ago."

Alice sobs cut off abruptly. She tried to sit upright and her hand flew to her head. "He's dead? It can't be...He's really..."

"I swear it Alice," I said. "We got here just as they were about to take you. Laurent and James are both dead."

Alice was trying to get to her feet, only Jasper's hands on her shoulders were preventing her, "I have to...no stop. I have to see him. I have to know..."

Jasper was looking somewhat panicky. He didn't want to manhandle Alice but she was so determinded to get out of bed when she was clearly in no fit state to do so. Then again, who would be fool enough to try and reason with Alice? Not I, "Jasper, would you take Alice to see the bodies if that's what she wants?" Jasper nodded and I switched a piercing glance to the little imp, "Then bring her back in here and see that she rests." Alice nodded too. "Then please come and help me, Jacob looks as though he is going to be difficult to move."

Jasper laughed and I left him to deal with Alice. When I got back out into the courtyard I checked both of the men over quickly. Both had steady heartbeats, both were breathing regularly and neither of them were bleeding to death. These were all good things and so I headed to the kitchen. As I was going in I could hear Jasper and Alice making their way to the front door.

"Lauren?" I called out loudly enough for her to hear if she was anywhere in the building. No answer came and I moved around the table intending to search anywhere she might be hidden. Instead I almost fell over her. Lauren was lying sprawled on the floor. My first glance was not encouraging. Around her head there was a lot of blood.

I turned her over as gently as I could and saw that she was clearly dead. Her skull had an actual dent in it. Her eyes were frozen open and I closed them. I gave a sad sigh and sat back on my knees. I felt terribly sorry for her and for a moment I grieved for the obedient and sometimes cheerful girl I had barely known. She was a slave just like Bella and Alice after all. Perhaps she had her own story of awful misuse and now her story was over.

I sat there with her body lost in thought until Jasper joined me. He let out a sigh and I felt his hand on my shoulder. "I feel so bad Jasper."

"You have nothing to feel bad about, brother. You did everything in your power to stop James. There was no way to know that he would do something as foolish as this."

"It almost worked." I shuddered as I thought about what could have happened if I had arrived even a minute later.

Jasper knelt beside me, "But it didn't. There are no prizes for 'almost'."

"Anyway, that's not what I was feeling bad about."

"Oh?"

"When I was looking at her, all I could think of was how grateful I was that this isn't Bella...or Alice," I added because it was true. The priority order in my life had undergone some changes recently. The women in my life had always been simple. I loved my mother and Rosalie most of all and that was that. Now there was Bella who had somehow overtaken everything and Alice who had at least joined Esme and Rosalie on the list.

It was as I was considering this that I realised something which should have occurred to me earlier. It was embarassing to concede that I had not thought of it before now, but I supposed I should go and locate my wife. "I should check on Tanya," I mumbled.

"Oh she's not here," said Jasper.

"What? How do you know that?"

"Alice said she left just after you did, immediately after. She took one of the horses," said Jasper waving a hand towards the stables.

My eyes fell on Jacob again, "Well, at least she's safe."

XXX

Tanya arrrived to a fairly calm scene. Had she been there an hour before it would have been different. There would have been bodies, slaves unconscious and slaves being doctored. She would have seen Emmett conducting matters as though he was a general and Jasper turning the air blue with the magistrate, who happened to have been in the legion once upon a time. Once a soldier...

By the time she arrived home we had already had the whole story from Jacob, Michael and Alice. Some time after Tanya had left Jacob had arrived back with Michael. They had locked the door as per my intructions and were simply awaiting my return. Then there had come a smell of smoke in the courtyard. Bella, Alice and Lauren joined in the search for the source. Bella had gone to check the stables, Alice the servant's quarters and Lauren the kitchen.

Michael had been checking the main house, leaving Jacob alone in the courtyard when there had come a frantic knocking on the door and a shout of fire. In Rome fire could mean destruction on a large scale and after the knocking had stopped Jacob decided to take a quick look outside. As soon as he took the beam away, the door was shoved open and Jacob remembered nothing else.

At this point Michael added that when he had come back downstairs he had seen a man I knew to be Laurent standing over Jacob. Bella had been lying next to Jacob, unconscious as well. Michael had considered attacking him but instead he had taken the time to try and find a weapon. He didn't get far, James had come into the house and there was a scuffle. Michael was forced to flee the house where he met the same fate as Jacob in the courtyard.

Alice had heard the voices shouting and she had come out in time to see Michael struck over the head by a pursuing James. He had fallen forward onto the table which was how we found him. Alice's voice had been shaky as she recounted her part. She was sure that they hadn't noticed her until she gasped at the sight of Bella. Then the two men had only had eyes for her.

James had approached her slowly and carefully as though she was a timid animal then she only remembered pain and darkness. I supposed James had little choice. Two screaming struggling women were bound to attract attention. His hope had been to remove them with as little fuss as possible, I was sure.

The only unanswered question was concerning Lauren. Had they chased her? Had they hit her? It seemed unlikely to me. There was only the injury to her head and the size and shape was telling. I suspected that Lauren had run, either from Laurent and James, or simply out of fear and she had fallen, cracking her skull on the table.

None of the others had damage to their faces and Michael and Jacob had been left once they were no longer a threat. As much as I would like to add more blame to James and Laurent, I suspected Lauren's death was an accident. An accident for which they were responsible but an accident none the less. It was possible they never even knew she was here.

There were enough witnesses to satisfy the law that the Cullens had not been the agressors and that was all we needed. Emmett, Jasper and I were sitting at the courtyard table with a cup of wine each when Tanya finally decided to grace us with her presence. I had half expected her to spend the night wherever she was.

There was still some evidence of the crisis that had occurred and when Tanya came through the door was I recognised my Uncle Marcus's slaves escorting her. Clearly she had retreated to my great aunt Didyme; her former mother-in-law. This would probably mean a lecture from someone claiming to love us both very soon. I thanked the two men and sent them on their way. I had dealt with enough strangers trampling my home today and I wanted no more.

Tanya's eyes fell on Lauren's body. We had laid her out, as I had decided that she must have a proper funeral; the songs must be sung for her, wine must be poured on her grave. The rituals must be observed, the poor girl deserved at least that. "What in the name of Dis..?"

She sounded so bewildered that any remaining anger I was harbouring vanished. It all seemed so tiresome and I was exhausted. "The men who wanted Bella and Alice back broke into this house tonight," I spoke with almost no inflection. The whole thing had begun with her carelessness but I did not resent it so much anymore. After all, the thing had ended the way I wanted. If it had played out differently everything could have changed. Maybe I would have sent the girls to the market together and they wouldn't have returned. How would I have even known where to look for them?

I realised Tanya was still looking at me, expecting more of an explanation so I elaborated, "We arrived home in time to stop them. The two men are dead, Alice and Bella are recovering as is Michael. Everything has been dealt with."

Tanya mouth opened and shut several times as she looked around her, "Everything?"

I nodded, "The magistrate had been here, he agrees we were the wronged party. He might even offer us compensation from the slave market but not for some time I should imagine."

Tanya let out a breath, "Well, that's good news." She tried a smile but I couldn't summon up a response. "I'll just...go to bed then."

I nodded, "Good idea." Tanya left us as abruptly as she had arrived and I sank back into my chair. I hadn't even noticed my body tensing until she left.

Emmett and Jasper gave polite nods to Tanya but they didn't speak. We just sat in companionable silence until something forced its way to the front of my mind. "Jasper, what made you say that Alice was fiery?"

"Huh?" He asked in total confusion, and given my abupt choice of conversation I didn't blame him.

"When I said that James wanted Alice back, you described her as 'the little fiery one'. I don't necessarily disagree, but what made you say that?"

Jasper looked uncomfortable for a moment, "Do you remember that night I came for dinner? It was after I had been so rude to Alice, you invited me for dinner as cover for a slip or some such?"

"Yes, I remember," I said.

"Well, you excused yourself for a minute and I took the opportunity to apologise to Alice for my behaviour the first time we met. After Emmett let me know I was rude..."

"Yes, that was me," said Emmett, slurring his words ever so slightly. He had drunk more wine than Jasper and I.

"Anyway, Alice thanked me for my apology but her eyes flashed as she said it and I knew she wanted to say something more," I nodded, I knew that look. I had even seen it on Bella's face a few times. "So I told her she was free to speak her mind and she told me what she thought."

"What did she say?" If I wasn't very much mistaken, Jasper was actually blushing.

He took a deep sip from his cup before he spoke, "She said that, in her opinion, men who needed to look at women the way I looked at her, were either more interested in other men and trying to show otherwise, or had cocks the size of infants'."

Both Emmett and I clutched our side laughing. I could picture the scene perfectly; I could almost imagine the little imp speaking those words, "She actually said, 'cock'?" asked Emmett when he could speak clearly again.

"That she did. Then she apologised, smiled very sweetly and asked if I wanted anything to drink. It was a first for me anyway," Jasper pushed his hands through his hair and I could see that he was still blushing.

Something connected in my brain and I fixed Jasper with a piercing stare, "Alice is a special girl isn't she." For a moment I knew I sounded like her father, and oddly, I didn't dislike it.

Jasper heard my meaning in my tone and he looked up to meet my eyes, "That she is. I said when I first met them that you got lucky."

I gave him a smile and settled back into my chair with my wine.

XXX

After two hours of lying in bed, I knew it was no good and I got to my feet. It had been late when Jasper and Emmett had left. My brother had offered to leave Jacob with me for longer but I told him honestly that I could not see a reason. The danger was passed and now we could all rest a little easier.

Except that I couldn't rest, not at all. I pulled one of my older tunics on and left my bedroom. Tanya was sleeping soundly and I doubted that she would notice my absence at all. I still moved stealthily anyway as I reached the courtyard and crossed it to the servant's quarters.

I needed to see her. She hadn't woken yet but I wasn't concerned, I suspected her body was protecting itself from what she had gone through today. Alice's door was slightly ajar and I peered inside. Normally I would not have done so but I wanted to make sure Alice was okay. Sometimes head injuries could be tricky...but I could hear her regular breathing and I pulled the door closed behind me.

With trembling fingers I opened Bella's door. She was lying as she had when I had put her there hours ago. Although her skin was as pale as ever she had a little colour in her cheeks. I ran through the usual things, her breathing, her heart and her temperature. It gave me an excuse to come close to her and touch her skin. I had been so afraid for her today, just touching her warm skin and knowing she was allright helped.

Once I had completed my list I knew that I should go. I should get back into my own warm bed and stay there. If I did what I was about to do I knew that I would be playing with fire; almost begging to be caught. Though the sad fact was that I didn't care. I gently shifted Bella towards the wall and lay down next to her as carefully as I could.

This was what I wanted, I wanted to be with this girl. She shifted in her sleep and wriggled against me. I took advantage of her movement and spooned myself behind her body in a wonderfully comfortable position.

Just as I was settling down and allowing sleep to overtake me I heard Bella's voice, "Did you come and find me Edward?"

Her fingers clutched at the arm I had wrapped around her waist. I kissed the back of her neck gently. "No Bella, I didn't let you go at all."

"Hmmm...that's good." Bella wriggled a little again.

"I love you Bella," the words just came out before I could stop them. For a moment I thought about trying to find some way to take them back. But I didn't want to. They were the truest words I had ever spoken and I was tired of trying to hide them. I was in love with Bella and it was time that she knew it. "I love you and I won't let anyone take you from me."

"That's good," said Bella again. She turned her head and kissed me sleepily. As she wriggled I buried my face in her hair and I tried not to think about the fact that she hadn't said it back.

XXX

When I awoke the next morning I was wonderfully relaxed. Even before I opened my eyes I knew that the sun was not really up yet...and that fingers were combing through my hair. I remembered where I was and who I was with and smiled. I groaned in pleasure and the fingers paused.

I opened my eyes and discovered that during the night Bella and I had both rolled over and now she was curled around my back. As wonderful as her warm body felt around mine I turned over, I wanted to see her. "Good morning, Bella."

She gave me a beautiful smile, "Good morning, I'm sorry to wake you so early but..." She looked uncomfortable, "Well, the sun will be up soon. I should start my chores." I didn't like the oddly formal tone in her voice, she was never like this when we were together at Eric's.

Bella made as though to get up and I wrapped an arm around her waist and pulled her back to me. She didn't fight me, as I had known she wouldn't but she did give me another one of those beautiful smiles. "Don't go yet, stay here with me."

Her fingers stroked the arm I had around her gently, she leant forward and kissed me for a second, "I would like that Dominus..."

"Edward." I corrected her immediately. It was bad enough that she had to call me 'Dominus' in front of other people, I didn't want her doing it when we were alone too.

"Edward. You know that I would, but mistress will be angry if breakfast is late and Lauren will need help."

I felt a lump form in my throat. So much had happened, it seemed odd that she didn't know yet. I took Bella's hand in mine, "I have to tell you something Bella, Lauren died last night." Bella didn't make a sound but her mouth dropped open, "I found her in the kitchen. I think she was running from James and Laurent and she fell. We're going to have a funeral for her."

Bella's eyes dropped and I saw them filling with tears, "This is...if we had never come here..."

"No, Bella don't do that. No listen to me," I could see that she wasn't going to listen and it seemed desperately important that she did. "I mean it, I will hear none of it and I will not have you thinking it. James and Laurent were the ones at fault. They broke into my home and tried to take you and Alice by force. They broke the law and they have been punished. They are both dead and curse them to Dis."

"James is...dead?" Alice's reaction had been similar; they seemed afraid of believing it could be true.

"Yes, I arrived in time to delay them, Jasper and Emmett helped me with them," I didn't feel the need to go into details. Thinking back on it I almost regretted letting Alice see the bodies, though it had seemed the best option at the time.

"James is...dead." It wasn't a question this time, she was testing the words for truth.

I gave a small laugh, "Yes Bella. It's over and he's never coming for you or Alice ever again."

Bella smiled again and this time it spread to her eyes. Her hand gripped mine tightly and I half-expected her to kiss me but then the smile vanished as quickly as it had appeared, "But Lauren is dead. It's too late for her."

Her words echoed my thoughts from last night. "I know and that is terrible, but Bella, you cannot hold yourself responsible for this. You are not the first person to need help dealing with the dregs of Rome."

Bella bit her lip, "You shouldn't have had to kill someone for us."

And there it was, if I didn't tell her now I would have to lie, at least by omission. My hands stroked her shoulders, but now it was a nervous reaction. I didn't know how Bella would react to what I was going to tell her, there was a chance that she would see me very differently. "Bella, I need to tell you something about me and you might not like it."

The crease appeared between her eyes, "You don't have to tell me anything if you don't want to." She wriggled back into my arms and her hand stroked my chest. She planted a kiss there. "I want you to be happy when you're with me."

My heart thudded at her words, I pulled her mouth to mine and kissed her, "I'm always happy wherever I am as long as you're there." She blushed prettily and dropped her eyes, "I want to tell you Bella. I like talking to you and I feel like I can trust you."

"Then tell me." Her brown eyes stared trustingly into mine.

"I suppose I should start at the beginning?" Bella just smiled and I took it as an invitation to continue, "Well, the beginning is Rosalie, my brother's wife."

"She's very beautiful," Bella said quietly.

"If you like fair hair," I stroked my fingers through hers and Bella smiled. "Her father was a good man and her mother was a good woman. Had she been raised with them her life would have been very different to the one she lived. But they both died of a pox when she was twelve."

"How terrible for Rosalie," said Bella biting her lip. Her empathy was amazing considering how much she and Alice had suffered.

"She was distraught of course, but we all tried to make things easier for her. Our parents had been great friends and we all loved Rosalie and her brother."

"She must have been glad to have some family left."

"Oh she was, and we determined to help them both anyway we could. Esme even suggested that they came to live with us but Royce, her brother insisted that he was old enough at eighteen to take over the running of his father's house. Esme didn't approve but she and Carlisle decided to watch over them quietly." I could hear the resentment forming in my voice and I knew that Bella could too. It was still difficult to talk about.

"We all tried to help them but gradually Royce created distance between our families. It was a slow process, Roslie was fourteen before we really noticed. Royce had money enough to live comfortably, or excessively, for the rest of his life if he wanted. I suppose you can guess that he chose the excess. Carlisle lamented his chosen path but there was nothing they could do. Then Rosalie's visits started to lessen." I clutched Bella tighter to me without realising what I was doing. Her fingers stroked the back of my hand soothingly. "When we did see her, she wasn't Rosalie anymore. You have seen how she is of course, my sister-in-law brings life to every gathering, she always has. But not then.

"She was quiet and withdrawn. She, Emmett, Jasper and I have shared everything since our infancy and suddenly she wouldn't talk to us. Then we didn't see her for almost three months. She didn't respond to any of our letters. When we visitied, individually or together, she was not at home to us. Eventually we wrote to Royce asking if there was anything we could do to help."

"Did he reply?"

"He did, he said that his sister was being courted by a man who didn't approve of her visiting us. He said that the man was wealthy and kind to Rosalie and that she had fallen in love with him."

Bella gasped, "But...your brother..."

I nodded, "Exactly, Emmett was frantic. I couldn't tell you exactly when it was decided that he and little Rose would marry but it seemed ordained by the gods. We had all known it was going to happen eventually.

"What did he do?" She looked enthralled and aghast at the same time.

"I don't know what he would have done, but the same night Royce sent his letter, Rosalie arrived at Jasper's house. It was late at night, she was alone and she was wearing no shoes, only a night dress.

"Jasper sent us a message to come to his house immediately. Emmett and I didn't hesitate of course. When we arrived Rosalie was in a terrible state. She was bleeding from several cuts on her back and there was damage..." My voice trailed off at the horrified look on her face. I reminded myself that Bella didn't need all the details.

"Once I had treated her injuries she finally told us the truth. Her brother had been raping her for almost a year. But he had been putting his hands on her for much longer. He had threatened her with terrible things to ensure her silence and it had almost worked.

"Until Royce told her that he had severed her ties with us forever. He told her about the letter he had sent us and that we would never forgive her betrayal. Rosalie was so angry that she attacked him and he beat her. So she waited until after Royce had fallen asleep for the night and she ran away. Jasper's home was the closest and it was to him she turned. She confessed later that she half-expected Jasper to turn her away. Royce spent a lot of time frightening her with things that weren't true." I decided not to tell Bella the things I knew of Royce's mental torture of little Rose, how he had told her that she was dirty now. How he had told her that death was still the penalty for sluts who force their brother's to commit incest.

As Alice had said about James' treatment of her, no one should have to know these things if they don't have to. "But she got away," Bella interrupted my thoughts. "She managed to get back to you all."

I swallowed hard, the truth was becoming harder to tell and it was getting more difficult to meet her eyes. "But she was still afraid. She knew that Royce would not let her go and we knew it too. It would be imperative to him to get her back, after all, if what he had done to her became known it would have been the end of him in Rome." I laughed humourlessly, "Rosalie was shocked to hear that. She had been convinced that she would be the one blamed."

Bella's hand squeezed mine and I involuntarily looked up. Her brown eyes showed nothing but understanding. "You don't have to tell me anymore Edward. Not if you don't want to. I think I know how this story ends."

I felt my mouth drop open, "But..."

"Either you left Rosalie in danger or you...and your brother and friend I guess, stopped Royce from ever hurting her again."

"It wasn't like that Bella. It wasn't...I know what you must be thinking of me, of us. But truly we did not intend to hurt him. Emmett wanted to, of course, but we all agreed it would not be the way to handle it. We went to see him that same night, or rather, early the next morning."

"Where was Rosalie?"

"I gave her something for the pain, we didn't leave until after she was asleep. Jasper's slaves guarded her under threat of death. She wouldn't have wanted to let us go you see. She was irrationally afraid of Royce, which was what he had wanted of course; Rosalie afraid all the time. She never would have let us go." I said sadly.

"But you went anyway..." she prompted.

"He was still in bed, sleeping off the night's exertions," I could see Rosalie as clearly now as I had then, the bloody result of those exertions. Lying on her belly so I could dress the wounds on her back. She had been in so much pain, but so, so brave. I had known hardened soldiers who were less stoic when I had been doctoring them. "Emmett dragged him to his feet and shook him and we set about our business."

"Which was?"

"To threaten him, to frighten him. We told him that everyone would find out what he was and what he had done. There is one thing a coward fears above anything else, being found out to be a coward. We hoped to drive him out of Rome with enough fear to ensure he would never return."

"But he didn't want to go?"

"As soon as he realised that we knew and that we had Rose somewhere safe he seemed to lose his mind. He struggled against Emmett's grasp which I know from experience is next to impossible but he had been hiding something from us. We discovered later that we weren't the only ones who hated Royce, he had been making enemies for sometime. Gambling and seducing young girls were his favourite past times. Since he expected one of the many to attack him soon he had taken to sleeping with a blade."

As I recounted this part of my life I realised that it wasn't only the image of Rosalie's pain that I remembered clearly. It was all clear. It felt as though I was there again, living it. I had been scared, barely more than a boy, the same as my brothers and yet we had known what was right. We had acted in a way that we hoped would ensure the minimum of trouble with the best intentions. Unfortunately things hadn't gone as we had planned.

I had spent so much time struggling to forget that day and now I couldn't stop the memories. So I decided to let them come, "He stabbed Emmett," I said shuddering. And again I was watching as a dagger slid into flesh, "It was one of the worst moments of my life. I have never been a coward, but I have never felt so weak as when I watched my big brother crumple to the ground with his own blood on his hands."

Bella had moved even closer to me if that was possible. She was practically in my lap and both her hands were in mine. I tightened my grip on her and felt my heart slow a little. She was my tonic and I needed her then, "Jasper and I just froze, you must understand. It was so shocking. We just stared at Emmett transfixed until I heard Jasper grunt beside me." I was so caught up in the telling of my story that I half-turned my head as though I expected Jasper to be there.

"When I looked down I saw the same blade he had used on Emmett sticking out of Jasper. Royce was always a good shot whatever else was wrong with him." I couldn't keep the bitterness out of my voice. After seeing what that bastard had done to Emmett I should have been more on my guard. I should have stopped him cold right then, but I hadn't. It had taken Jasper falling to make my body obey my commands again.

"Once Jasper and Emmett were both wounded I was alone against Royce, but now we were both unarmed..." My voice trailed off. Bella didn't need the details, it was like a prayer I was repeatng in my head. She didn't need to know that I had torn his throat out...Bella wasn't just squeezing my hand to comfort me now, her grip was like iron. I finally dragged my eyes up to hers and saw what I had been dreading. Fear. Her eyes were wide with it and she was even paler than usual. I felt as though she had been reading my thoughts.

I hurried to correct it, "Oh no, Bella, no. Don't be afraid of me. I..." I couldn't think of what to say. 'Please don't be afraid, I had the best intentions' sounded very weak in my head. I had killed Royce after all.

Bella relaxed her grip and smiled, catchng me off guard, "Edward, shhh... I'm not afraid of you," her face flushed red. "I was just a little...I guess I got caught up in the story but...well obviously you won, I mean here you are."

I let out a laugh that came purely from the tension inside me, "You were afraid I might lose?" I laughed again, more genuinely this time.

She looked defensive and bit her lip, "Well, no. I was just..."

I pulled my hands free of hers and wrapped my arms around her again. I was relieved that she settled willingly into my embrace, "I didn't know I was such on orator. Maybe I should give up doctoring and become a playwrite?"

"Perhaps, you could travel in a wagon selling your stories to the enraptured people," she said with a grin. I could suddenly see clearly the picture she painted and it was alluring.

"Well, if I'm selling the stories, then you're driving the wagon." I wondered if she would like travelling, I thought that I would as long I was not constantly trying to save wounded men. I was so caught up in the fantasy that I wasn't sure if I imagined the change in Bella.

Her smile didn't fade but it seemed to almost freeze on her face, she recovered quickly though and pressed her lips to mine, "I'm terrible with horses, and they don't like me very much either."

I wasn't quite ready to stop kissing her then, it seemed possible that I might not have Bella think the worst of me. I was inclined to celebrate that fact but after a few seconds her words made sense in my brain, "You seem to get on well enough with Seth."

Bella looked surprised at my sudden change of topic, perhaps even a little put out. Her breathing was unsteady, "Well, he's different. He's almost like a person."

"I know what you mean." My eyes were fixed on her lips again, they were looking well-kissed. I bent to continue but Bella stopped me.

"You didn't finish," she said.

"What?" I asked.

"Your story, you never finished it," she said gently.

"Do you truly want to hear the rest?" I asked her. There wasn't much more to tell that wouldn't ruin my promise to avoid the details. "Suffice it to say, I won the fight between us. It ended with my sword in his chest." I said bluntly. That was how it had ended after all, the fact that it had been almost an act of mercy was not important. Royce had been an animal but I wouldn't have left any other animal to die like that.

Bella nodded as though that was exactly what she wanted to hear, "Good."

"Good?" She couldn't have said anything that would have shocked me more.

Bella was still nodding and when she saw how surprised I was she smiled at me again, "Much better him than you." She kissed my cheek.

I opened my mouth having no idea what I was about to say, "You're a strange woman."

"I am?" She asked calmly, but I could hear the anxiety behind the question.

I stroked my fingers across her cheekbone, mirroring the spot she had kissed me, "In the most wonderful, beautful and amazing way, yes."

I would have been happy to go back to kissing her again, but Bella was not done asking questions now she had started. "Did you get in trouble with the law?"

I shook my head, "Jasper wasn't seriously hurt. His wound was only in the shoulder and I was able to bandage him well enough for him to move. It was difficult but we managed to get Emmett on his horse and back to Jasper's house before dawn. Once there I set about treating their wounds properly."

"Were they badly hurt?" Bella asked biting her lip again and I fought the urge to laugh.

"Emmett was the worse of the two; he lost a lot of blood. But he's always been stronger than anyone I know. He was up and sat by Rosalie's bed by the time she awoke later that day. I had to let him go to her, it was the only way I could get him to promise to stay still."

"What did you tell her?" She asked.

"Nothing." I gave her a smile, and her reaction didn't dissappoint me.

"Nothing?" Her voice was almost a squeak.

"Just exactly that. When she woke she was in a lot of pain and I had to keep her semi-conscious for three days. By the time she was truly aware again she was being cared for by Esme. She was in the guest room that had really been hers since the death of her parents. Rosalie started to cry when she woke and she confessed everything, everything Esme had already heard from Emmett and I."

"Poor Rosalie." Bella eyes filled with tears, "Did she never suspect..?"

"She knows exactly what happened, but she never asked us. Emmett moved slowly for a week or two and she must have noticed. My nose was broken in the fight so that was obvious as well. When we told her that Royce had been found dead in his bed she took the news very calmly. She already knew," I said with a shrug. It was difficult to explain how it had all happened.

Rosalie hadn't needed to ask us and we hadn't needed to tell her. My father had helped me treat Jasper and Emmett. Then he had set my nose after the break. He knew what we had done and he hadn't judged us. Neither had my mother. They understood. I guessed that the state of Rosalie's poor young body was a powerful factor

As I was struggling to find a way to explain I felt Bella's arms slip around my neck. She wriggled until she was sat astride my lap, "It explains her obvious devotion to you." Then her lips were against my neck and I just managed a soft grunt as a yes. I hoped she understood my intention.

"Did you truly believe I would think worse of you if you told me this?" She asked quietly, but her lips were still kissing me and it took me a moment to form the thought.

"I thought you might think of me...differently."

"If I do at all, it's not for the worse. If I could have found a chance, I would have ended James' life in a second." There was a look in her eyes that I believed completely and I pulled her face to mine. I didn't want to talk about this darkness anymore. I was happier here with her, in the light.

Then there was a sudden, frantic knocking against the door to Alice's room, "Wake up," I heard the imp hiss. "I just heard Domina calling from the house."

I leapt up and out of Bella's bed and was half-way to the door before I froze. She was sat perfectly still and I felt an awful twist in my gut. Leaving her here and running back to my wife seemed wrong. I moved back over to the bed and pulled her into my arms quickly, pressing kisses to her face, "I meant what I said last night Bella, I love you. More than I knew I could love anything."

I didn't give her a chance to respond. I called quietly to Alice to return to bed and went out to lie to Tanya.

XXX

I should have been feeling better. Any threat to Bella and Alice seemed to have passed and the latter had recovered from her injuries with had left her quite ill for several days. Now whenever I walked past the kitchen, or wherever else they were I could hear their good natured revelry.

The day of Lauren's funeral Jasper had visited to tell me-us-that it didn't look as though there was going to be any trouble over James' death. Alice's hands trembled, but otherwise she gave no outward sign of emotion. She just nodded her head and smiled calmly. Since then James' name had not been mentioned and I hoped to the gods that it would never be again.

Tanya had even been behaving herself, perhaps she knew how close to the edge she had pushed my temper and didn't want to repeat it. She had only insisted that I lie with her once since that night and when I refused her the next night she didn't press the matter.

Whatever her reasons, the result was the same, everything was going smoothly. I had even been able to tell Rosalie that her pregnancy was progressing well. Yet in spite of all the good fortune floating around, and the fact that I had been spending the night in Bella's bed since I first ventured there, I was not happy.

I was in fact becoming less happy and I knew why. Since the morning I had confessed my secret and told Bella I loved her, things had been different between us; she was different with me. The worst part of it was that it was nothing that I could trace to a source. I was spending my days weaving between the idea of her being disgusted by my revelations or repulsed by the idea I loved her.

The problem was that neither theory seemed right. If she thought less of me because of my actions then she was a much better actress than I could have imagined. She had taken everything so calmly at the time, I couldn't believe her reaction was artifice.

Which forced me to question whether my declaration of love had led her to pull away from me. She had not responded in kind after all. If she didn't feel for me the way I felt for her it threw doubt on everything we had shared. I found myself wondering if I had imagined our connection; if she simply felt that she had to provide anything I requested. Was it possible she still thought she was my slave?

The idea was repulsive and seemed absurd when I was rational. After all, I had given her many opportunities to refuse me and she had taken none of them. She had in fact been angry with my apologies; insisting that she could and did think for herself.

I wanted desperately to be alone with her again, truly alone so I could force her to talk to me if necessary. When I came to her room she was nearly always asleep and she woke me when she was getting ready to begin her chores. I then had to return to the house, and my wife. But so far she always sighed happily and wriggled into my arms when I came to her bed. Sometimes she said my name and gripped the arm I wrapped around her. We didn't make love at night, not with Alice so close by, but somehow it felt more intimate anyway. Was it possible I was imagining things; attaching meaning where there was none?

No, I didn't believe that I meant nothing to her, but perhaps I didn't mean as much as she meant to me. I tried to force myself to accept that possibility but I couldn't; I didn't want to.

Instead I chose to try to ignore it. Bella and I still found time to be alone enough to make love but it was, as always, in a snatched and unhappy way that left me less sated not more. If she closed her eyes more during these times I tried to ignore that too.

But ignoring things brought me no closer to a solution and I should have known better than to try. Pretending that things were not happening was not an answer and the tension inside me was getting agressively worse each day.

I was desperate to get away with Bella for the night but it was difficult. James had been having us watched after all and although I was sure it was not happening any more it was still unsettling. Add to that my irrational anxiety about leaving my home undefended and my nerves were stretched very thin.

I knew that things could not remain this way, they would have to be resolved eventually and to my surprise it was Tanya who brought it about. Her good behaviour had been a pleasant surprise but I should have known that it would not last. Still, she tried very hard for over a week, then when I came to bed one night she was much less accomodating.

Her hands stroked the back of my neck despite my declaration that I was tired and wanted nothing more than sleep. The truth was that I wanted her to sleep so that I could go to Bella. This night, Tanya was determined. I tried to shrug off her touch twice but she wouldn't be deterred. Instead she pressed her lips to my shoulder and slipped one of her hands around my waist.

When I felt her hands encircle me I jumped away from her. Pretending to sleep was not going to work tonight, she might just continue without me. "Tanya, just stop." I said tiredly taking her hand away and rolling onto my back.

There was a silence that lasted too long and then she almost hissed at me, but there was no anger in her voice. Just frustration at my reluctance. "Why? Edward, what is wrong? I'm your wife, why won't you lie with me?" The hand I had removed touched my chest and I snapped. I couldn't do this, not now, not here and not with Tanya. I knew it made me a bad husband but I couldn't control how I felt. So I tried to sound as calm and commanding as I could when I sat up.

I struggled from the bed and reached for my clothes. "Yes, you are my wife and I am your husband. I will have you when I want and not at any other time." I hated the words I was speaking. Tanya didn't deserve this, but I kept my back resolutely to her as I dressed.

"If you would just talk to me..." Her eyes were filling with tears, I could hear them in her voice and I felt terrible. But I just couldn't bring myself to lie back down. I couldn't face it.

"I'm sorry, Tanya. This is not about you. You have done nothing wrong."

"How can that be true? You have barely touched me in months. I'm sorry, I know I angered you when I sent the girl to the market..."

"Bella, her name is Bella." I realised too late that there might have been too much feeling in my voice and I hurried on, "Her friend is Alice, Michael is the man and Lauren is the young girl who died."

Tanya held up her hands, trying to placate me, "Allright. I'm sorry I sent Bella to the market. I knew your rule and I went against it. It was wrong of me to do that, especially considering how things turned out for...Lauren." Her stumble over the name was only momentary but I knew she had never bothered to remember Lauren's name before even though she had been here over a year. "I'm sorry I did that, but how long are you going to punish me Edward?"

"This isn't about punishing you."

"Then what is it about?" At my silence she continued, "I have always known that you visited the brothels and I have never complained because it never turned you cold. But now...We barely speak Edward. What has happened? What has changed?"

There was nothing I could say. She was right in every respect. "I'm sorry," I said quietly and I walked out of the room.

I couldn't stay there and talk to my wife. I needed to see Bella and I had to see her now. She was saturating my mind and my body. I couldn't think about anything but being with her when we were apart and when we were together I wanted her. I was in love with her. Like my father loved my mother and Emmett loved Rosalie. I had found something I had been sure I never would and all it caused me was pain.

I tried not to dwell on the painful part. Concerns be damned, I needed her now. I banged on Bella's door once and she opened it. I was pleased to note that she was still dressed, Alice was in her room sat cross-legged on the bed.

I was momentarily embarassed but there was no point in indulging in that emotion. I was past caring. I gave Alice a smile which she returned and then I looked at Bella, "Will you come with me?" I asked. It seemed as though it was only good manners.

Bella's eyes widened, but she nodded picking up the black cloth from the table that she always used. She said goodbye to Alice who was smiling slightly and followed me out of the servants' quarters. She automatically slipped out of the front door while I went to get Seth. Michael was already half asleep and I told him to stay where he was, I didn't want to have to wait for him to saddle a horse, not tonight.

Bella was waiting for me, concealed as always and I felt another stab of pain. Bella should not have to hide out here and wait for me. This was so wrong and I knew it could continue no longer. I helped her up onto Seth and held her to me as we moved through the streets. I was already planning. The situation was now impossible, I was miserable, Tanya was miserable and Bella was barely speaking to me. I was hurting everyone even when I didn't know how I had done it. I had to do something and now.

We arrived and were welcomed by Eric as usual. I wondered briefly what he made of my current habits, perhaps they were familiar to him from other patrons. I took Bella's hand and led her to a room. She followed me willingly enough, and as soon as the door was shut behind us, she reached for the straps of her dress. She didn't even look at me first and I felt again how wrong her behaviour was. This was not the Bella I had come to know and I didn't like it.

I reached for her hands and held them in my own, "No, Bella. Tonight we talk."

The little crease appeared between her eyes as she looked at me but she nodded, "If you want Edward." She made to drop her hands but I kept them in mine.

"No, tonight is not about what I want." I had been thinking enough about what I wanted to last a life time, "Tonight we're going to talk about what you want."

"All right..." The crease deepened.

"And we're going to talk about whatever is bothering you." I said in a rush before I could lose my nerve and back out. It would be too easy to just take her in my arms and make love to her, but it would solve nothing.

Bella was shaking her head."There is nothing..."

"Stop. Bella, please stop. Don't tell me there is nothing, it's a lie." Her face flushed a deep red that convinced me I was right more than anything else could. She dropped her eyes and stared at the floor, "Did I upset you? Now that you have had time to think about it, do you hate me for what I did to Royce?" I held my breath waiting for her answer. If she hated me for my past there was nothing I could do to fix it.

But Bella merely looked surprised at my words, and although she was still flushed she met my eyes again, "No, Dominus of course not. I told you..."

"Yes, well I've already caught you in one lie tonight. Though I'm glad to say I believe you this time." I was truly glad that I hadn't frightened her with stories of my past, but that only left one option. I couldn't think of anything else, "But then what is it?" I asked her. "Is it...what I told you before...and after?"

Bella tugged her hands from mine and took a step backwards. "Please don't," she whispered and her reaction made my heart thud painfully. She couldn't deny the cause of her distance from me anymore.

"Should I not have told you that I love you?" I asked and I could hear the tremor in my voice. I wondered if I should be embarassed by it but I couldn't be. I just wanted her answer.

Bella was shaking her head again, she squeezed her eyes shut, "No, you shouldn't. You shouldn't say that to me."

"Why is that?" I asked taking a step towards her then stopping because I wanted her to keep talking to me and being honest.

"Because it's not true. It can't be." Her voice betrayed the tears that were close and I fought the urge to hold her. Why was I constantly reducing women to tears?

I forced some calm into my voice in spite of my racing heart, "Bella, it is true. They were the most truthful words I've ever spoken..." I tried to show my sincerity but she cut me off.

"No, stop! Please stop. I can't hear anymore." She held up her hands as though to push me away though I wasn't close enough for her to touch. Her attempt at defense broke my heart. What had I done to this girl?

"Bella, I...I'm sorry. I thought I gave you every chance to say no, to refuse me. Did I not? Did it seem as though there would be punishment? What did I do wrong?" If she would only tell me I would do everything I could to make it right.

Bella's tears slowed and she frowned at me, "No, we have talked about this before, I made the choice."

"Why?" I asked.

"You know why," she blushed again, "Because I wanted you."

"And now? Do you not want me anymore? Tell me." I thought if she said it was true it might shatter me into pieces but I couldn't be sure that the not knowing wasn't worse.

"I...I...Edward I..." She wiped her hand across her cheek.

"Bella please don't cry. I don't want to see you unhappy. I want to see you smiling and happy, the way you are with Alice, that's all I want. I love you."

"No, you don't." She said and her eyes flashed angrily at me.

I was taken aback by her tone, but I was grateful for anything other than tears, "Why would you doubt me? Do you not want me to love you?" She was still shaking her head but I wasn't sure if it was in answer to my question or not. Pushed beyond all patience I reached for her shoulders. I needed her to look me in the eyes, it was the only way I had any idea what she was thinking, "Bella, do you feel anything for me?"

"Of course I do," she almost hissed. For a moment she reminded me of Alice.

"What? What do you feel?" I ploughed on, "Gratitude? Affection? Lust? Tell me."

Bella shook herself free of my grasp and turned towards the door, "If...If you don't want to have me tonight, perhaps we should..." For a moment I couldn't believe that she was suggesting we go, now. But as soon as I did I reached for her hand. I couldn't let her leave in the middle of this conversation. We had to finish it.

"No, Bella. You're going to tell me because I can't stand this anymore. Do you know what it's like wanting you, loving you this way? I spend every minute thinking of you, even when we're together. Do you know how that feels? It feels as though I'm drowning in you." The words fit perfectly with my feelings.

"Do I..?" She asked looking incredulous. Her voice seemed to strengthen then, "Yes Edward, I know how it feels. I know everything you know and more..."

"Bella, tell me..." I begged.

"Yes, you would like that wouldn't you? You want me to tell you I love you so that the next time you leave my bed and return to your wife it hurts even more." She was almost shouting now but I didn't care.

I was sure my heart actually stopped beating as I struggled for the words, "Do you...love me?" I asked her hardly daring to believe it.

Bella laughed in a humourless way and wrapped her arms around herself, "Yes you fool. Of course I love you. I don't remember what it was like to not be in love with you, which is ridiculous since it was not so long ago. The first time I woke and saw you I thought I had died in that cage and you were an angel. I spent days watching you whenever you couldn't see me. The first time you kissed me I..." Her skin coloured and I watched the blush spread over her cheeks. I remembered the first time I had kissed her too, just for a second in the courtyard. "Why do you need to hear this? Don't you see how much harder this makes everything, it was bad enough...What difference could it make to anything?"

"Bella, if you want me as I want you I will leave Tanya. I will divorce her, free you and Alice and marry you. Hell, Alice can stay with us and if she wants I will find her a rich older husband she can wrap around her finger." Bella's mouth dropped open in shock and I took the opportunity to reach for her hands again. "I know that sounds cowardly, I should not put this decision on you, I should make it myself. But the truth is that yours is the vote that counts. If you want me and I divorce Tanya there will be consequences; consequences I will gladly endure. If you wish it so."

"And if I don't want you?" She asked with a raised eyebrow.

"Then I will still free you and Alice." I fought the urge to flinch, I meant it absolutely. "This cannot continue as it is Bella. Something has to change or all our sanity is at risk. I love you, and I..." she cut me off.

Bella's finger's stroked my cheek. She bit her lip but her voice didn't shake, "I want you Edward, I love you so much it hurts." She was whispering but her eyes blazed at me. I froze, I couldn't believe she had actually said she loved me.

"You...you do?" My body seemed to have disappeared. I wasn't aware of my limbs at all, all I knew at that moment was her face and the possibility that I had heard her say she loved me.

Bella reached up and placed her hands on my chest, "I know I should not say such things. I don't have the right to ask you for anything. You have already done more for me and Alice than anyone else has ever. How could I ask you for more?" She grit her teeth and frowned. Her hands gripped me as best she could, "But the truth is, I want more. I want you to leave your wife and be mine." Bella flushed and her eyes dropped, "I know I am not worthy of you but I want you anyway."

Suddenly I could move again, I pulled Bella into my arms roughly and buried my face in her hair, "I love you Bella. You are everything to me. You shouldn't think about being worthy of me, it is I who don't deserve you. You have never asked for anything from me and have given me everything you have."

"But I don't have anything to give you," she said confused.

"You have yourself and you are all I want." I was already pressing kisses to her bare neck.

Bella's fingers tangled in my hair, "Edward, I love you."

My heart throbbed in my chest and I held her tighter. Her body trembled against mine and I found her lips finally. She sighed into the kiss her fingers tugging my hair as she fought to have me closer. I was only to happy to help her. I lifted her off her feet and carried her to the bed. She pulled me down with her and for a few moments our hands struggled with each other's clothes.

Once she was naked beneath me I was able to give her the attention I had wanted to for days. Every time I saw her body it was new to me again. Her pale skin in the candlelight was the most tempting thing I had ever seen. I planted kisses over her breasts and belly gently. Bella clutched at my shoulders trying to draw me up to her but I would not be hurried. When I settled between her legs and stroked my tongue against her, Bella whimpered and her fingers were back in my hair in a second.

She seemed happy to let me take my time now. As I tasted her sweetness I groaned in longing. I couldn't decide which urge was stronger, the one to stay right where I was, or the one to bury myself deep inside her. Bella's cries convinced me and I teased her slowly until she wailed in release, her body shaking violently.

Only then did I move up her body and slide into her as slowly as I could. Bella's eyes flew open in surprise but she immediately wrapped her legs around my waist. I couldn't have waited any longer, I ached for her. I felt her tighten around me and let out a hiss at the sensation. "Oh Bella..."

"Yes..."

She kissed the side of my face and I lost myself in her.

XXX

**Opinions people! Come on, the button is winking xxx**


	7. Chapter 7

**Tuesday is here again! Just a few comments on the last chapters. I know James ended up out the picture pretty quickly, but consider what he was up against? And don't worry it's not all plain sailing yet. Tanya still needs to hear the news after all...**

**Thanks to weekitty for waving back, and to x123 who always writes amazing reviews, to t3r35a22 who is always so nice and to LizS2009, who I think is a bit of a romantic, (I am too!). Apologies to vhawk730, for whom my updates never come quickly enough, I'm very sorry and I high five to Kgunter34 who was glad to see James bite the dust. And a special thanks to Katie1477 who joined the reviewing party.**

XXX

Chapter seven

The sun was just passed it's greatest height when I approached one of the few houses in Rome to be painted white; my heart beating frantically in my chest. I normally felt calm when I was here. Everything was so familiar to me and it always felt like a homecoming.

Carlisle beamed when he saw me and embraced me as he always did. For just a moment I indulged in the fantasy that I was still a child and that my father would be able to sort out the mess I had made easily. He had a gift for that kind of thing; seeing ways to resolve problems was his specialty. I doubted that he would have any simple answers this time but I felt as though I needed the illusion, at least for a moment. Carlisle led me into the main room, it was bigger than mine and everything in here was white or cream too. "Edward, you have me at a disadvantage, were we expecting you?"

"No father, you weren't." If he noticed the tension in my voice he didn't show it. I suspected that he did notice, my father was nothing if not observant. His tone stayed pleasant and welcoming though.

"That's a good thing because your mother is not here and she would feel terrible if she was supposed to be," he said with a rueful smile which I tried my very hardest to return. "Always a pleasure though, my son. Anything particular you wanted to discuss?" He took a cup of water from the low table in the centre of the room and poured me another.

"Yes, but where is mother?" I asked scanning the room as though I expected her to emerge from a cupboard. I felt slightly guilty at how grateful I was for my mother's absense today. She always gave good advice but the truth was that her love for me; her desire to see me happy might contradict what she otherwise might say. I needed the more logical of my parents today.

"She's at the baths with Siobhan and Maggie." My father was now watching me closely and he waved the servants away giving us some privacy. "She won't be returning for a few hours at least." He added, he had guessed the point of the question.

I opened my mouth but I didn't know what to say or how to begin. Carlisle didn't rush me, he just watched me with concern etched onto his face. He knew that there was something wrong with me and he was giving me the chance to voice it as I wanted. Perhaps my mother's presence would have been a good thing. She would have pried it out of me much more efficiently. In the end I couldn't think of a delicate way to explain my situation. It was not going to be an easy conversation and I decided if I couldn't do this gently, I would do it efficiently. "I feel as though my life is collapsing around me," were the blunt words I chose.

Carlisle was instantly on the alert. He put his cup down on the table again and leant towards me. His face a perfect picture of focus. I was lucky to have him for a father. "Tell me son," he said quietly.

And I did. I told him everything as I had told it to Emmett and Jasper. Though now, my father had the added details about James to add to the list. His eyes widened a few times but he didn't interrupt once. I hoped that wasn't simply due to shock. When I was done I felt relief; as though a weight had been lifted from my back. I knew my troubles were not over, but I had chosen the right person to share them with, "So what do I do father?" I asked and if my voice shook, Carlisle pretended not to notice, "Please tell me, help me." I begged at the end. I would beg more if it was needed.

Carlisle sat back in his chair for a few moments and when he spoke he took me by surprise. I had been getting lost in my own thoughts, "Think carefully before you answer me Edward. Is it love you feel? Truly? Or is it just desire?"

"Care to offer me a definition?"

"To love is to sacrifice, to sublimate your own needs and wants to someone else. Loving someone changes you completely. To desire...well to desire is to claim, to consume, to crave someone with no logic or reason." He said, "So, which?"

I considered for a moment, but the answer was simple really. "Both," I said honestly. "I would do anything for her, I would have her happy no matter the cost. Second only to that wish, I want to have her by my side forever. If it means we have nothing to our names in the world but each other I would be happy."

Carlisle made a 'hmmm' noise and touched his fingers to his chin in thought, "I see."

When a full minute had gone by without him speaking my nerves got the better of me, "So? Your opinion, any opinion is welcome."

Carlisle let out a sigh, "Well, the answer seems simple, even is the action is not. You divorce Tanya, making all necessary arrangments for her future, you free Bella and marry her."

My mouth dropped open, I could literally hear it even though I couldn't seem to feel it. Even at my age, my father could still surprise me. I loved that about him very much, "You don't sound happy about it." I said, as I could think of nothing else to say. I was hoping the words I had heard him speak were real.

"I'm not sure what the consequences of this will be. But I do know that they may be far reaching and severe. But..." and my father gazed at my face, scrutinizing me. "I have never seen you this way Edward and...I won't lose my son. I mean to say, I understand the pain you're in. I can not encourage you to prolong it. Whatever the price."

"Was this how you felt when you thought you couldn't be with mother? If it is I don't know how you survived it." I had only had to endure this agony for a short time. My mother had been married twice before my father and I knew now I would not survive seeing Bella with another man.

Carlisle's face looked pained and I was sorry I had asked the question. "It's not an easy thing to bear. I do understand."

"I know you do, I just wish there was a way to resolve this to everyone's satisfaction, but I..." my voice trailed off.

"There is no way Edward. When this happens, someone always gets hurt." His eyes held no condemnation as they stared into mine. I saw only unconditional love. "But to leave things as they are...well I would not advise it."

"I should stay away from Bella." I felt as though the words cut me as I spoke them, but I needed to say them anyway. I needed my father to understand that I had considered the unselfish route. "I know it would be for the best." Except that it would end me.

"But would it truly?" Carlisle asked in the same tone he had once used when we had discussed my medical learning. As though we were still having lively debates about treatment options for patients.

"I don't understand." I said honestly.

"You are unhappy because you can not be with the woman you love. Tanya is unhappy, she feels the distance between you. She doesn't understand it and it is hurting her. Your Bella is also unhappy, forced into the position of mistress. An unfortunate place in which to find oneself if you are in love."

I flinched at the idea of Bella's pain. I had seen evidence of it last night and I didn't want to see it again. Even so I felt I must defend myself. "I didn't force her to anything, I swear..."

Carlisle waved a hand and interrupted me. "Forgive me, I didn't speak plainly. I only meant that she is compelled by her feelings for you. As you are by yours for her. This situation is satisfactory to no one."

He spoke as though he conclusion was obvious and there was nothing else to consider. How I wished it was the truth, "Except Tanya's parents and so to the rest of our family." I wasn't sure I wanted to discuss this problem but I would not hide from it either.

My father just sighed heavily. "Edward, agreeing to marry Tanya as you did was a truly selfless act even if you did not see it as such at the time. You have only now learnt to understand the consequences. You could not know how you would feel about Bella and so you did not know what you were giving up. But the point is...nowhere is it written that everyone gets to be happy but you."

I could see the direction he was taking but I wasn't sure I could agree with it entirely. After all, my being happy could make a lot of people less so. Surely that didn't balance out. My father seemed to sense my doubt. "If you are being selfish now, then Liam was selfish, Emmett was selfish, everyone was selfish. I could have divorced your mother and married Tanya myself and spared my children and nephews the pain. But...I was selfish." He smiled at the shock on my face and shrugged his shoulders.

I was finding it hard to hide how appalling I found his last suggestion and I almost stammed, "No, father. You were not selfish. You love mother and..."

He cut me off again, "And you love Bella. Why should I get to be with the woman of my choice while you are denied?" He demanded.

I wanted to jump up from my seat in celebration at his words but I couldn't. "Because I married Tanya," I said instead. I dragged my hands through my hair, "Foolishly, hastily, naively perhaps. But I married her. I made a choice and now I feel...I feel as though I am so weak because...because..."

"Because you can not fight this?" Carlisle asked gently.

"Yes." I whispered.

"Love is not a choice we make son. Love is made and shaped by the god's. Try to fight love and you suffer. As you are learning." I felt his hands squeeze my shoudler but I couldn't raise my head. I was in danger of letting this happen. I was too tired to fight anymore and Carlisle was telling me exactly what I wanted to head. "There's only one thing to be done now son."

"What's that?" I asked.

"We have to find Tanya a new husband."

XXX

As soon as I pushed open the door to the courtyard I met a pair of brown eyes. Bella was leaning across the table, scrubbing it. The sun was setting and I wondered how she had fared today and if she had missed me as desperately as I had missed her.

My eyes travelled over her body and when I came to the swell of her breasts I could see the flush creeping up her neck. "Bella..." I whispered.

Her answering smile was tiny but it was definitely there, "Dominus," she said politely.

"Where is everyone?" I asked her. I tried not to make the question to obvious but there was no way to hide it.

"Alice is upstairs preparing a bath for your wife, and Michael was borrowed by your brother this afternoon." The small smile on her face grew a little and she bit her lip.

I grinned back at her even though I didn't know what was so funny, "Oh?" I asked.

"Oh yes. There was a problem with a new bed for a baby I believe. It needed to be resolved immediately according to your brother." Bella was smiling widely now, "He was very...very insistent that it needed to be fixed immediately."

As soon as I was smiling at the thought of little Rose cracking her pregnant whip I was moving around the table to Bella's side. If Tanya was taking a bath, then we had a little time. I reached out for Bella's hand and her eyes glanced nervously towards the house and the window she knew led to the room I shared with Tanya.

"Dominus..." she said.

"Shhh," I said quietly. I took her hand and led her quickly to the stables, "It's Edward." As soon as we were out of sight of the house and well-covered I pulled Bella into my arms.

Her hands went around my neck and tangled themselves in my hair. She tugged me closer and moaned when my tongue stroked her bottom lip. "Edward..."

"I spoke to my father today, about us," I gasped.

Bella's kisses didn't cease and her words were staggered, "You did?"

I could hear the surprise in her tone and it irritated me enough to make me pull away. Surely she didn't think I could have changed my mind. "Of course. I wanted his advice. He suggested that I try to find a new husband for Tanya."

The crease appeared between Bella's eyes, "How...do you think that is a good idea?" She asked slowly.

She didn't seem to want to say anything without trying to guess my response first. It made me suspect that she had not had a good day after all. Instead she had spent it worrying about whether or not I would change my mind. My hand drifted to her cheek and I stroked the skin there with my thumb, "I think it is an excellent idea, though I'm not sure who would be a good candidate." I hesitated for a moment before I continued. I didn't want to keep things from her. "I did have one idea, but I know now it won't work."

"You thought you knew someone who would marry Domina?" Bella's eyesbrows shot up and I suspected she was surprised how easy I found it to discuss this. After all, most husbands didn't like the thought of sharing their wives.

"Yes, I thought so." I hesitated again. It was hard to tell Bella this, but I wanted to. He had not forbidden it after all, but I would have automatically kept my council in the past. The past was now any time before I had met Bella. "I had hoped that Jasper might be interested in..."

I had barely begun when I felt Bella's grip tighten on my arm, "Oh no that would..." She stopped herself and bit her lip hard.

Suspicion was forming in my mind and I thought that Bella was struggling with the same quandry as I was. "Do you know something about Jasper?" I asked her as gently as I could.

Bella bit her lip even harder. So hard that I reached out for her chin to make her stop. I didn't want her hurting herself. "I know that if he was to marry your wife my happiness would come at too high a price." Her brown eyes were staring into mine as though willing me to understand what she was trying to tell me. I thought that I did. Unlike me, she had been sworn to silence.

"It allright Bella, I know. Jasper told me." I said with a smile. "I still can't believe that I had no idea."

"I think he liked her spirit."

I laughed and had to fight to keep my voice low, "Did she tell you what she said to him?" I asked still chuckling.

Bella grinned and nodded, "She's said much, much worse things in the past."

I had been planning to say more on the subject of Alice and Jasper's attachment to each other but the sight of Bella's smile stopped me short. It was the look I had wanted to see more often; the look she wore when she and Alice laughed together. It delighted me and rather than continue our conversation I pulled her back to me, kissing her. "Don't worry," I whispered after a few moments...or hours. "I will tell Tanya of my plans tonight. Perhaps there is someone who interests her."

Bella was kissing me back and I wasn't entirely sure she was listening to me. Her body was pressed against mine and her hands were clinging to my shoulders as she tried to move herself impossibly closer. I was not inclined to argue with her and threw myself back into the moment.

I knew I couldn't let things go too far here, there was too much danger of discovery. But Bella was whimpering in my arms and I was already hard as a result of her rubbing against me. It took little to make my body respond when I was close to her. I could feel her heat pressed against me and I fought to ignore it. I could just kiss her and it would be allright.

I was congratulating myself on my control when Bella took my hand in hers and guided it to her breast. For a reason I could not divine, her small demand for me to touch her lit a fire. I pushed her carefully to the back of the stables until we reached the farthest wall. Then my hands roved over her body.

My hands stroked and teased her nipples through her thin cotton dress and they hardened under my touch. Bella was rubbing herself brazenly against the hardness she could feel between my legs and it was torturing me. Whatever else I thought I could get away with I knew I could not bury myself inside her now. But I couldn't ignore her need either, it was too seductive.

Instead I dropped to my knees, and pushed her dress quickly up her legs. When there was no fabric between her soft flesh and my tongue, I licked her gently. Bella gave a small wail and her fingers returned to my hair. She was still leaning against the wall and I took advantage. I lifted one of her legs over my shoulder. My hands pinned her hips where they were and I returned my mouth to her.

She tasted sweeter than ever and she felt warmer too. I gave a groan. My body was aching for her and I didn't know how much longer I could wait to have her whenever I wanted. Bella was gasping quietly and I knew she was fighting the urge to cry out. Her hips were starting to grind against the tongue that teased her...

Then the door to the courtyard opened and I could hear Seth being brought in by Michael. I had forgotten that I had left him out there once I had seen Bella. We gave almost identically timed groans of disappointment though Bella's was even more pained than mine was.

Knowning we had only moments I pulled her to me and kissed her mouth desperately, "Bella, my love. Just a little more patience. A little more and you will be mine."

Bella was trying to fix her clothes without pulling away from me, "I'm aleady yours Edward." She kissed me, "I love you."

I kissed her once more and then stepped away. "Hide here until Michael has settled Seth. Tonight I will tell Tanya."

Bella was breathing heavily, her cheeks were flushed and I could still taste her desire, but she nodded and disappeared into an unused stall just as Michael entered the stable.

XXX

I had never spent so long a night as that one. I had spent nights surrounded by dying men; been forced to listen to them cry out for relief I could not bring. I had wept with despair as I had watched these men die, knowing I could have saved them had I had the means. But this night was longer still.

Dinner seemed to take forever to consume. The food, which I knew Bella had prepared and was delicious, stuck in my throat. The wine Alice served tasted foul, even though I knew it was not so. I was in the kind of hell where everything seemed set against me. Tanya was in an unusally cheerful mood. She had even had a gift sent to Rosalie as congratulations on her pregnancy.

Tanya chattered away about various family members and friends while the whole time it was all I could do to keep my face together. I could not decide on the best moment and while my wife talked endlessly about matters that did not interest me I grew more desperate.

There was no reason why any moment should be better than any other. Why should I not tell her now? Except every time I gathered the courage Tanya began discussing something new and I misgave.

Once Tanya rose from the table and announced her intention to retire for the evening I knew I was out of time. I got up from my seat instantly and followed her, "This is a nice surprise husband," she said with a smile I was sure was supposed to be seductive.

Instead I found it almost grotesque, when I knew what my true purpose was tonight, "I have things...that I would discuss with you." Again it seemed hard to speak the words but once I had I felt better. Those words were my first step on this path. I would take each one and not let the weight of the guilt crush me.

And there was guilt. This woman had been a good and faithful wife and through no fault of her own she could not make me love her. There was nothing else she could have done and I tried to tell myself that there was nothing I could do now either.

Tanya took my hand and allowed me to lead her upstairs, "I have things I wish to discuss with you too, when you are ready of course." She inclined her head respectfully. The gesture was almost a little too sincere but I did not comment. It was not the most important thing tonight.

"If it is important I would like to hear it," I said taking a deep breath. Once I had delivered my news it seemed unlikely she would ever want to talk with me again. If she had something to say now then I would gladly listen.

"I would say it is of some importance," Tanya gave me a sweet smile. "But I'm sure your news is of more import than mine."

Her fixed smile began to unnerve me. Tanya had never been the type to behave this way and it had been one of the things I had liked about her in the beginning. She spoke the words she meant. "I insist Tanya. Please speak first."

Tanya pushed open the door to our bedroom and strode in. She seemed strange to my eyes and I realised she was almost bouncing as she walked. When she turned to face me her eyes seemed to sparkle, "Very well." Tanya's face stretched into a grin. It looked odd; as though she as trying to appear happy when she was not, "I have the most wonderful news Edward." She came towards me again and took my hand, "You're going to be a father."

Suddenly her smile was all I could see and I thought I understood it. Tanya was obviously thrilled at the news and was behaving as though I would be also. But she was by no means certain of my response. She had reason to doubt. Her words wounded me deeper than any weapon could. I still could not tear my eyes away from her slightly hysterical smile. She was waiting for me to reply but I still could not speak.

How could this be happening now? I had touched her so few times and I had been so careful to avoid the times when...But my medical training disagreed. I had lain with her and she was with child. All the planning in the world couldn't prevent it when the god's ordained it so.

I wondered if that was what this was. A sign that the path I had chosen with Bella was the wrong one. The idea filled me with rage. I didn't believe that I could want Bella this much, love her this much and not be meant to have her. It was too cruel. But my pregnant wife was still standing in front of me.

She had dropped my hand; hers had moved to her stomach in a maternal gesture. Her smile looked completely false now and I could see her breasts heaving in panic as she waited for me to speak. Still I could not do so. She had stunned me. I was supposed to be the one delivering life altering news tonight. How could this be happening? What was happening exactly?

I tried to arrange it logically in my mind, Tanya was with child. I was to be a father. "Edward...please say something." My eyes re-focused and I saw that although she was still trying to smile she was now biting her lip at the same time.

It reminded me of Bella biting hers and it shocked me out of my stupor, "How...How long have you known?"

Tanya released the lip from between her teeth, "I've suspected for some days. My bleeds are so consistent. Today they are two weeks late."

My heart leapt. If that was the case then there was a chance, just a small chance that it was not so. On the other hand it meant that the pregnancy was in too early a stage for there to be any outward sign of it yet. I could not be sure one way or the other and meanwhile Tanya was still smiling at me. I tried to remember what men were supposed to say on these occasions, "That...It's wonderful news my dear." I felt as though I was slipping into an ocean. I wanted to fight it but I didn't know how.

Tanya let out a gasp and then threw her arms around me, "Oh, I am so glad to hear you say that. I know you weren't sure about us having children yet, but sometimes these things just..." Tanya held me tighter to her, "I'm so happy Edward."

My arms moved around her as they were supposed to do but I wasn't conscious of moving them myself, "So am I." I said as I sank deeper.

XXX

I was forced to leave the house the next morning without having the chance to talk to Bella. Tanya had not left me alone for more than a moment since she had given me her news and her enthusiasm convinced me I was doomed to torment for the rest of my life.

After breakfasting I left the house as I usually did so that I could visit my patients. In reality I didn't make it ten paces from my own front door. Instead I stood close by and listened...and watched. My uncle Marcus' slaves arrived and Tanya departed the house almost an hour later; she did not see me. I made sure I was concealed as she passed, it was not her I needed to see.

That thought alone twisted my guts with guilt. Tanya was now not only my wife but the mother of my child. Why could I not endure her company now?

After Tanya disappeared from sight I slipped back into the courtyard and was annoyed to find it empty. I had hoped that I could speak to Bella subtly, but the need for tact wasn't going to stop me. Hearing voices I made for the kitchen. Bella and Alice had finished clearing the remnants of breakfast. Bella was stirring a pot while Alice was peeling potatoes. I froze in the doorway suddenly unsure.

I had no idea what to say to her. She would surely have been expecting good news this morning. Instead Tanya had come down for breakfast in an excellent mood, she had even gone out of her way to be polite to all. Bella must be curious.

As though she had heard me thinking of her, Bella turned and her eyes caught mine. I wasn't sure what she read there but the colour drained out of her cheeks. Her mouth opened slightly and she took a shuddering breath. I was about to speak but she stopped me. Bella just nodded and smiled at me, though the smile looked very pained. Then she turned around and focused intently on the pot in front of her.

I felt like an errant child that had been dismissed. I knew I deserved it and far worse but I needed the chance to at least try and explain. Even if that proved to be impossible, "Bella, could I speak with you please?"

Bella stopped stirring and paused, but she only hesitated for a moment and then she walked towards me. I nodded to Alice, who was not smiling this time, and led Bella out into the courtyard. When I turned to face her, her shoulders were so tense they were almost hunched to her ears. Her breathing was shallow and her cheeks had yet to regain the colour they had lost a few moments ago. Her whole appearance hurt me, because I was sure it meant that she was hurting inside. I had intended to make a speech but instead only her whispered name came out.

Her eyes came up to meet mine, they were dry of tears but I could only imagine the effort behind it. "Dominus, you do not owe me anything. I understand perfectly. Please, do not make yourself uneasy..."

"Bella, as Edward and your Dominus, I ask that you stop this." I couldn't bear to hear her speak to me this way; as though we meant nothing to each other. It wasn't true. Whatever else happened now it seemed vitally important that she knew that.

My words had the desired effect. Bella dropped her eyes and her teeth found her lip. "What would you like me to say?"

The exhuastion in her voice affected me more than anything else could have. It almost hurt. I took a step towards her, my arms were already help out, but I stopped myself. That would not help anything. "I don't want you to say anything, I just want you to listen so I can explain."

"I don't need you to explain anything to me Dominus."

"Well perhaps I just need to give the explanation," my tone was a little harsher than I had intended. I reasoned it was just the stress of the situation, but it gained a reaction none the less.

"Very well, as you wish," she said with a minute sneer in her voice.

I wanted to smile at her spirit but now did not seem like the time, "I intended to tell Tanya everything last night Bella, but I..."

"Dominus, please, I beg you..." Bella turned away and this time I did reach for her.

"No, you must listen," I held her at arms length. If I held her close to me now it would be my undoing. My body cried out for her but it was more than that; my soul ached for her too. I would never be complete in this life without her and it was taking all of my self-control not to give in.

"Very well, if you say I must listen then I will."

I ignored the unspoken words. The ones that stated clearly that she was remaining in my presence under duress. I steeled myself but there was no real preparation to be done. Only the coming out with it. "Bella, Tanya told me last night that she is with child."

I didn't know what Bella had been expecting me to say to her but it was not that. Her eyes softened but it was only with shock. "She is..."

"Yes." I said with a sigh. In truth I was relieved that Bella seemed to understand how much more difficult this made...well, everything.

If her reaction was anything to go by she understood perfectly. Her hands fluttered by her sides and I wondered if she might be about to faint. "I see," she said finally in a whisper.

I took a step towards hers, "Bella, I don't know what..."

"I do," she held up a hand to halt my advance. "You are going to be a father."

The way she spoke the words sent a chill up my spine. She spoke them as though they were the final lines of a story, the conclusion, the end, "I understand but..."

"Stop, you have to stop there. Becoming a father has to be the most important thing to you." She seemed to be absolutely calm while I was suddenly the one in danger of panicking. The finality in her tone was terrifying.

"I know, but I..." I struggled to find the words. I hated that there was any question about my happiness in this situation. But the truth was that I would not have it so if it was my choice. "If the mother of my child was..." I tried to explain.

Bella did not seem to want to hear explantions and I was reminded forcefully of our first encounters at Eric's house. "Dominus, it has to be the most important thing."

"It would be different if you were the mother of my child." I spoke hurriedly.

"But I'm not. I'm...not the mother. Your wife is." Her voice seemed to chill in those few seconds and I couldn't bear it.

"Bella please."

"No, it must stop now. It must." Bella was biting her lip and she refused to meet my eyes. She was turning away from me for what she said was the last time. Panic seized me and I reached for her hand. She stared down at it joined with mine and when she finally looked up at me, pain was evident on her face.

My voice came out sounding strangled but I didn't try to cover it. I wanted her to know how much pain I was in, the worst thing in the world would be for her to think this was easy for me. "Bella, how can I give you up? How am I supposed to...be without you."

"You had a good life before me and you will again." She made it sound as though it would be the simplest thing in the world and I couldn't decide if she had suddenly become a fool. This was even worse than I had imagined. I had not been able to think of a way out of this situation but I had hoped against hope that together we might.

I didn't understand how she could take this news so calmly. When Tanya had told me I had felt as though I had been kicked in the stomach by a horse. How could Bella even suggest that things could go back to the way they were? "No I didn't. I didn't have a good life, I didn't really know what it meant to be happy. I can't let you go Bella." I gripped her arms and pulled her towards me.

Bella's brown eyes fixed me with a another cold stare. All trace of the pain on her face was gone and she regarded me steadily. "Dominus, I am your slave and your property to command. I will do as you tell me. But from now onwards know this, it is no longer my wish that you touch me." She spread her hands, "Not that I could stop you."

My hands released their grip as quickly as if I had been burned. "Bella..."

"It must be this way." She said firmly, uncompromisingly and I knew she had chosen her words carefully.

"I..." I didn't know what to say. If Bella believed as she seemed to then she would only think worse of me if I tried to pursue her. I didn't want her to hate me.

"I must be getting back to my work now Dominus," Bella walked to the door and paused. "Unless there is anything else."

"No," I croaked. "No, I suppose not."

XXX

Wine was truly a wonderful tonic. It made the sun shine brighter, it made dull people much more interesting and I was discovering that enough of it made the pain of losing Bella just intolerable. Two hours ago I had been unable to stop pacing, now I was lying in the bath, drunk, half-asleep and considering drowning myself.

I had decided not to go and see my patients today. No one was in danger of dying and I would be called if anything changed. I didn't have it in me. I needed to be alone for a while so I could pray to the gods for help. Unfortunately I was not destined for solitude. When the door opened I thought it was Michael with more hot water. I should have known better. "Dominus? Will you please tell me what in the name of Jupiter's cock has happened?"

I sat bolt upright in shock and soon regretted it. My head swam unpleasantly and I was forced to sit back immediately to avoid vomiting. "Alice..." My voice trailed off a little as I fought the nausea.

"That's correct Dominus, astute as always."

If any other slave had spoken to me like that I would have been furious. I didn't seem to be capable of getting angry with Alice. Perhaps she was too small, perhaps I found her amusing, perhaps I didn't want to squash any part of her. Either way I just sighed. She would know soon and I didn't want her to be angry with me again. "Tanya is with child." I said tiredly. "Bella will not have anything more to do with me and I don't blame her."

There was an almost deafening silence following my words. After an eternity I heard Alice sigh, "Oh."

I lifted my head and opened my eyes with difficulty, "'Oh'? Is that all you have to say?"

Alice shrugged, "What else is there?"

"Tell me I'm a fool. Tell me I should have stopped lying with Tanya. It was stupid of me, I didn't even want her. I ruined everything because I couldn't standing arguing with her about it. For the sake of a few nights peace I ruined it all." I sat upright and didn't feel nauseated. I was too angry with myself. "Tell me I should have acted the moment I knew how I felt about Bella; that waiting was the biggest mistake I've ever made or will ever make." So incensed was I that I got to my feet with out thinking, "I was such a fool." Without interrupting Alice handed me a cloth. I wrapped it around my waist. It didn't seem that important. "Alice, tell me to leave my wife anyway." I pleaded.

It was what I wanted to hear. "You know I can't do that." Alice was actually smiling at me with pity in her eyes. Somewhere my brain registered that she wasn't angry with me and was glad. Or at least, it would be glad at some point in the future. Right now it seemed less important than my being naked.

What was important was the truth of her words. Even Bella's best friend in all the world wouldn't tell me to abandon my pregnant wife. "Even if you did I couldn't leave her. I would never forgive myself." Other Roman men had done similar things I knew, but I was not them. I had been raised to try and be a good man.

"You would be right not to," she sounded as uncompromising as Bella had. I felt very alone...and incredibly selfish.

"Alice, what should I do?"

"Exactly what you're doing. I know you don't want to hear it, but I think you're doing the right thing. The only thing." She was correct. I didn't want to hear that.

"I will never be happy again Alice." I knew the words sounded overly dramatic and the wine was certainly loosening my tongue. It didn't alter the truth of how I felt though.

She chuckled softly, "You will be. You will have a child and you will love it." I supposed her words were true but they didn't make me feel anything. "But you will probably never stop wishing Bella was the child's mother."

"Never." I said miserably.

"Dominus," she said cautiously. "Perhaps you should send us away; sell us I mean."

My mouth dropped open in shock. "Sell you? To whom?"

Alice gave me a wry smile, "Someone who won't treat us too badly would be preferable."

"You want to leave here?" The idea of Bella leaving and me never seeing her again was agonizing.

"Oh no Dominus." She waved her hand to indicate the house, "This is the first place Bella and I have been truly happy in a long time. But I don't know if we can continue to be happy here. Can you?" She asked. "Be happy with us here? Do you want the constant reminder day after day?"

I hadn't really thought too far ahead but now Alice forced me to. I imagined living here with Bella and never being allowed to touch her again. If I kept to my usual timetable she would be here for more than a year and a half.

Yet there were few alternatives. I could either sell them or free them. Either way I would lose Bella forever and I knew I was not ready for that. I would not survive it. "I can not do that." I said quietly. Then to my eternal shame, and for the first time in over twenty years I felt my eyes filling and a sob shook my shoulders.

Alice hesitated for a moment but then she hurried to my side and offered me her arm. I took it gratefully and unsteadily climbed out of the bath. I had begun to wish I had drunk a little less. Alice wrapped an arm around my waist and guided me to the bed.

"You are not a bad man Dominus," I sat down heavily and Alice surprised me. She embraced me gently for a moment and patted my back. "I will tell Domina you were celebrating her news with Jasper and had too much wine." She picked up another towel from the pile and quickly dried my feet and legs.

Once she was done, I lay down heavily against the pillows and let Alice cover me. I didn't even flinch when she efficiently whipped away the wet cloth around my waist. Her plan sounded like a good one to me, "I must tell Jasper..." I mumbled. Even I could barely understand myself but Alice seemed too.

"I will make sure he confirms."

"Thank you Alice."

"Sleep Dominus." She tucked the bedding around me. "All will be well." Perhaps she thought I was already asleep but I heard her whisper, "Somehow."

XXX

I could say with certainty that the past two weeks had been the worst of my life. Bella had remained as removed and aloof as it was possible for her to be. Short of being down right rude there was nothing else she could do to demonstrate how little she cared for me.

The worst thing was that I could see right through it. Not all of my efforts had been in vain and I had come to know her a little. The way she held her shoulders when she deliberately did not look for me, the slight frozen edge to her smile, she gave herself away with a million miniscule gestures. I had become a student of them all.

Even when Bella was unaware of me I watched her. Sometimes I would sit in my window after eating and watch her and Alice together. They would laugh and chatter but I could see Alice's concern. She was watching Bella too.

I had spent almost two days trying to follow Bella's fine example before conceding an overwhelming defeat. I could not simply stop wanting her, and apparently she could not stop wanting me. No matter how her ethics might stymie her.

Her presence was a constant torture that I deliberately sought out. I could not understand my own behaviour when I paused to examine it, which I would just as soon not.

XXX

When Tanya had still not bled a week later I took a trip across the centre of Rome. Jasper's slave opened the door with a polite nod and Jasper appeared from another room to greet me.

"Edward, this is a pleasant surprise." He kissed my cheek in greeting.

"Apologies for..."

"Nonsense." He paused and took in my appearance. I must look worse than I thought, "Has something happened?"

"You could say that." I gave a humourles laugh. "Tanya is with child."

Jasper waved to one of his slaves who immediately brought over two cups of wine. "I'm sorry, brother. What are you going to do?" He didn't waste words, except to wave the servant away, "Leave the jug," he said. It seemed like a good plan.

Jasper had known of my intentions of course. He had been my first choice to marry Tanya, only his interest in Alice had forced him to decline. "I'm going to leave with the legion again. I can not stay here now. I need to spend some time away." It was the only thing I could think of that might help.

"Have you told Tanya yet?" From his expression he was imagining my wife's response to such news. She would probably not take it well.

"No. I've just been to request a place." I couldn't think too much about Tanya's reaction. I was more concerned about whether or not Bella would react at all.

"Any problems?"

"No, I leave in a week." They had seemed delighted to have me in fact.

"So soon? Taylor and I have another month in Rome."

"I can go on ahead, apparently."

"Doctors get all the fortune."

"Not all of it." I would trade any fortune given to me for the chance to stay here with Bella.

"No, of course not. Apologies."

I waved a hand to dismiss it, "That's not why I'm here." I took a deep breath and forced out the words I didn't truly want to speak. "Alice suggested that I sell her and Bella. At the time I couldn't consider it. But now..." My voice trailed off while I sought the words. "I don't want to sell them, but I can't live with them. Not now."

Jasper's eyes had gone wide and I knew he was thinking of who I might sell them too. Although I knew they had spent little time together, his interest in the imp must be stronger than I had supposed, "I can see that."

"I came to ask if you would be interested in purchasing them from me. For a very reasonable price I assure you." I held up my cup of wine. "This should be a fair enough trade."

"Edward..." The sympathy in my brother's eyes almost broke down my stoicism. Any attempt I had made to smile failed.

"They can not stay with me. I know it. Even when I return I will still want Bella and still be unable to have her. But the idea of never seeing them again; never knowing for sure if they are safe..." That was even worse.

Jasper shifted uncomfortably in his seat. "I had not thought to bring this up so soon, but you force my hand." He ran his hands through his hair, "I don't want to own Alice. I want to marry her."

"What?" The surprised question was out of my mouth before I could stop it.

"I apologise for putting it thus. I intended to wait until you had resolved your own situation with Bella. Then I would have approached Alice and tried to guage her affections for me." He looked very uncomfortable and I understood. I was jealous; Jasper could have what he wanted and I couldn't. But it didn't make me angry with him which was clearly his concern. I was just more angry with myself and my own stupidity.

"You want to marry her?" I had wondered if Jasper would ever marry again by choice, that was why I had chosen him. Although it was quite against convention for him not to, he had never shown much interest. He had happily consented to divorce his first wife, Maria. There had never been much love between them anyway. "I didn't think you knew her that well." I was too ashamed to admit that I had thought Jasper would only want Alice for a lover, not a wife.

"I don't. We have only spoken a few times. But I..." He struggled for words again. "I just feel as though I know her; I feel as though I have spent my whole life waiting to meet her. She is the woman for me."

However irrational it might sound to others, I found I could understand. Only too well. "Well then there is no problem. I will free her as soon as you want."

"What of Bella?"

Indeed, what of Bella? "I don't know. Would you still take her? Parting Alice and Bella..." I suspected that it would not happen. If Alice couldn't have Bella with her she might refuse to be with Jasper.

"Of course I would. You could free her as well. Perhaps we could..."

I knew what he was about to say but I cut him off. I didn't want to hear about Bella finding a husband, but if she was to be free and safe, she would need one. It hurt, "Perhaps. I should speak to them about it."

Jasper looked uncomfortable again, "I don't want to force Alice into anything, not just for the sake of her getting out of your house; for the sake of her freedom."

I laughed and this time it was genuine, "I doubt it would be possible to force Alice into anything that way. You would have better luck trying to braid wind."

"Perhaps I might have an occasion to speak to her privately?"

"At your convenience. But remember, I leave in seven days." I drank the rest of my wine and nodded my head to the slave who held the jar. She came forward to refill my cup. "I want to have things...resolved before I leave."

XXX

Three nights before I was due to depart I could stay away no longer. Once Tanya was asleep I slipped from the room quietly as had once been my habit. I crept quietly through the courtyard and into the servants quarters. I didn't need to be able to see to know my way.

Before I would have simply opened the door but now I tapped gently. I heard movement inside almost immediately and Bella appeared in the doorway. Her room was in darkness but I knew she had not been sleeping. I wondered if she was finding it as hard as I was to sleep at night.

"Bella, could I speak to you for a moment?" My voice sounded formal to my ears. I had no idea what the correct etiquette was for a situation such as this.

"Yes Dominus." Bella stood to the side and I took a few steps into the darkness. It didn't seem prudent somehow to be alone with her here in the dark,

She seemed so cold and distant. Although I was almost sure it was artifice it still made my heart clench inside my chest. "You must know that I will be leaving Rome soon with one of the legions."

"Yes Dominus." She didn't even meet my eyes.

"I...I came to say goodbye to you Bella." I wanted to reach out for her. I would give anything to hold her once more; to have her one last time. "Please say something." I begged.

Bella opened her mouth and her eyes flickered to mine. But then she bit her lip and I lost her again. "Goodbye Dominus," she was almost whispering.

Suddenly my discomfort began to turn to irritation. I was through pretending we were master and slave. I wanted to speak to my Bella, I knew she was in there somewhere. "Is that it Bella? Is that everything?"

"What else would you like me to say Dominus?"

"For the love of the God's Bella stop calling me 'Dominus'." Without thinking I reached for her. I could not bear not to be able to see her eyes. My hands closed around her upper arms and she finally looked squarely at me. The expression there stopped my anger and my voice dropped. "It's...ridiculous." My thumbs began to stroke her skin gently. "I love you and I know you love me. Is this to be our goodbye?"

Without intending to do so I realised I was leaning towards her. Her lips were slightly parted and suddenly I couldn't take my eyes off them. I wanted to taste her again. She was an opiate and I was the worst kind of adict. Bella suddenly gave a shuddering gasp and I was shocked out of my reverie.

My hands dropped from her arms as though she had become hot. "Forgive me. I'll leave you now."

I hesitated for a second. If Bella asked me to stay with her I would, I would do so in a second. But she didn't speak. Her eyes were still fixed on me and she was biting her lip but she didn't speak. "Goodbye then Bella."

I turned on my heel and shut the door behind me.

XXX

**What do we think people? Is Edward doing the right thing? Is he an idiot? Is Tanya some kind of evil witch with savant-esque timing? Opinions please?**


	8. Chapter 8

**Thanks to twithish, Liz2009, Kgunter34, dev12586 and sujari6, you wonderful people have as high an opinion of Tanya as I do ; ). **

**Yay to vhawk730 and t3r35a22 my cheer section for this chapter. **

**Thanks to mayi84, Go Team Edward.**

**More : ) : ) to HollyLouise.**

**Apologies to weekitty who I bummed out last time.**

**Special nod to x123, reviewer extraordinaire.**

XXX

Chapter eight

Jasper finally made his appearance the night before I was due to leave. Tanya and I were going to be out of the house for the evening

My mother had been delighted at the news that she was to become a grandmother twice in the same year. She had embraced me with tears on her cheeks and sent her love to Tanya asking after her well-being. I had been unable to assure her that aside from a few bouts of sickness in the morning, her pregnany was progressing smoothly. Carlisle however, had to fight to conceal his shock when I relayed the news but he didn't say a word.

He didn't like to keep secrets from Esme but I think he understood that this occasion was an exception. It would only cause my mother pain to know how desperately unhappy I was, and I did not want that. He embraced me and held me a little tighter than perhaps he might have done but he said nothing else. He knew without asking that I would do the right thing.

Esme was less happy to hear that I was planning one more tour with the legion. She and Tanya held almost identical views on that account. Although my mother delivered them with less hysteria. When I explained that this was to be the last time I went she reluctantly accepted my decision. After all, as I pointed out, it would be better for me to go now than for me to go when I would be leaving a child behind.

My mother insisted on having all close family for dinner the night before I left and I agreed quickly. Any opportunity I had to spend time out of the house was a blessing, it lessened the opportunities I had to lose control around Bella. If our absence gave Jasper his chance then so much the better.

Tanya had been reserved with me since I announced my intention to leave, but I was not too concerned. Once I had gone she would become absorbed in the business of being pregnant I was sure. I hoped.

XXX

Tanya lay sleeping next to me with a blissful smile on her face. She had been able to share in Esme and Roslie's conversation this evening and she had basked in the inclusion. I had also found other ways to tire her out, even though my motives had been less than pure.

After her breathing had been even for some time I slipped out of bed and washed myself clean. I felt sticky in the heat and I could smell Tanya everywhere. Once I was done, I threw on a sleeping robe. I knew I had no excuse to go and see Bella again. Her resolution was clear. But I couldn't lie in bed next to my wife tonight. I considered going to sit in the courtyard. It seemed like a good idea but it was just that much closer to Bella.

Instead I went to stand on the balcony. The night was too warm. I didn't like to imagine travelling tomorrow in the heat. It was going to be a torment, but it would still be better than being here; here where every day I was reminded of what I had lost. I marvelled again at my own stupidity. I should have told Tanya our marriage had to end the second I knew how I felt about Bella and I had known for some time.

I had been too cautious, I had hesitated and everything I wanted was slipping away. I ran my hands through my hair in frustration. Divorce was so simple, so easy for citizens. No notifications, nothing. I would have had to return Tanya's dowry of course but that would have been no real hardship. It would have been easy...except for the Denali's almost definite response. I tried to find some comfort in the idea that there would be no such hardship now, but it was hard. I leant heavily against the wall and stared down into the still lit courtyard.

For a moment I was convinced that I was imaging her shape at the table. But after I closed my eyes and opened them once again I was sure. Bella was sat staring up at me. I had noticed no movement and I knew she had been sat there for some time. For a moment I couldn't move. I just stared at her and she stared back.

Then I took a step forwards, I wanted to be closer to her, even though I knew rationally that I would have to go down the stairs for that. Bella got to her feet at the same moment and I saw her breasts heave against her dress.

Without bothering to think anymore I turned and moved as quickly as I could while trying to remain silent. Bella was waiting for me at the door to the house. When I was five steps away from her she reached out for me and I hurried forward. I gave a groan as her body pressed against mine. Bella lips were at my neck. She was kissing me again and again. Her hands roved wildly over my shoulders and back.

Her fire was intoxicating and I didn't even consider stopping her. Instead I tugged her gently towards the kitchen. Bella broke away for a second and she turned to the table. A pile of blankets lay on the table, I hadn't noticed before. I almost asked her about them but I decided it wasn't important at that moment.

I scooped them up with one arm and held Bella with the other. We came close to stumbling a few times as Bella was still kissing my face and neck. Her hands had found their way inside the robe I was wearing and her touch on my naked skin made me shudder with pleasure. I whispered her name and flung the blankets on the floor. My arms unencumbered I slipped Bella's dress down as her hands pushed the robe from my shoulders. We were suddenly and deliciously naked together.

Ignoring the blankets I lifted Bella up and her legs went around my waist. There was nothing between me and the wet heat between her thighs and I could not wait. I moved until her back was against the wall and I lowered her onto me gently. She gasped and her hands trembled as they clutched me. I simply held still for a moment, I wanted to remember how it felt to be inside her.

I forced control from myself until Bella began to wriggle in my arms, "Please Edward...please..." She was still kissing me desperately. "You must..."

I rejoiced to hear her say my name again and I gave in. Gripping her hips tightly I began to move inside of her. Bella gave a soft cry and her hands immediately sought purchase from the wall. Her left hand found a shelf and she moved to urge me faster. I had thought to make the moment last but it was not to be. My movements became frantic and I knew I would not last long, but I need not have worried. Bella wailed and bit my shoulder hard a few moments later. Her hands clutched at me again and again.

Her body tightened around mine almost to the point of pain but the pleasure was stronger. I shook as my body emptied itself into her. Her hand covered my mouth and I realised I had cried out. I kissed Bella's hand but I didn't stop moving until I was completely spent. When my legs were shaking a little less I lowered her gently to the floor.

Her hands pushed me backwards and she tugged me down. I realised she meant me to lie on the blankets. I didn't hesitate, but I did pull her with me. Her mouth was on mine and soon we were both out of breath all over again. Her hand slid down my stomach and encircled me. I groaned into her mouth but she did not break the kiss. Instead her fingers stroked and caressed, sometimes gently and sometimes less so.

Once I was hard and throbbing in her hands I realised I was being selfish. I moved down her body a little until my fingers could slide into the delicate folds between her legs. Bella gave a whimper and spread her thighs. Her mouth was still on mine and she whimpered as my fingers slid over her. Her hands didn't still though and touching her like this as she touched me felt incredibly intimate. I stroked her gently and Bella began to moan as she moved against my fingers. Her grip tightened slightly around me and I couldn't hold onto my control.

I pulled Bella on top of me. I was sorry for the loss of her touch, but she braced her hands against my chest and wriggled to get me into the correct position. Then I was lost again. She took her time, some of the urgency was gone, but this was sweeter. My hands teased her breasts and she rocked back and forth. Her soft cries filled the kitchen and I wouldn't have noticed if the room had caught fire. I was with my love and it was all I needed. Even if I knew somewhere that it couldn't last.

Bella's movements quickened and she took my hands in hers. I groaned as she pushed against my arms. It forced me deeper inside her than ever and the pleasure was intense. This time when Bella cried out I was with her.

XXX

Bella was lying sprawled across me. Her fingers stroked my chest and one of her legs was draped across me. She was still breathing heavily. She pressed her lips to my neck for a second then she said, "Tomorrow, I will go back to how I was...Edward."

I had been determinedly not thinking of tomorrow and her words caught me off guard, "Why? Why so cold?" I asked and I didn't try to hide the hurt in my voice.

She lifted her head and her brown eyes seemed darker in the shadowy kitchen. They looked wet, "I can not bear it." She gasped, "I have to fight all the time not to touch you." Bella was suddenly sobbing against my chest. Her hands clutched at my chest and all I could was hold her. "I do not want to see love in your eyes. It makes everything so much harder."

Although I could feel my conscience attempting to strangle me I spoke, "Bella, I will leave her. I will give her anything she wants. I will tell her that I will strive to be a good father, even if I can no longer be her husband. If you will have me, I will leave her...now. We can be married within a few days if you wish it so."

I had asked Alice her opinion on this indirectly and before she spoke I somehow knew Bella would agree with her friend. "How can I ask that of you?" She whispered.

"You are not asking me for anything. I'm offering myself to you." No matter how much guilt I felt I knew I would do it if she asked me. I was too used to getting what I wanted. Additionally, I had been trying to rationalise things internally for days.

"Please...don't say it like that..."

"Like what?" I didn't understand.

"The way you spoke, makes it sound as though I'm rejecting you."

My heart stopped beating as I registered her words. I didn't realise I had allowed myself a sliver of, now painful, hope. "Are you?" I asked.

Bella sighed and pressed two more kisses to my neck. "Edward, do you remember what I told you of my home?"

"Every word." I answered promptly, although yet again I had lost track of our conversation.

"My father Charles?" She asked.

"He used to play with you and Alice. He carried you both around with him." I remembered the image, two small girls being carried like sacks of food as they giggled. Perhaps her father had complained about their weight while pretending to struggle.

Bella wiped her eyes and looked at me, though every now and then a sob shook her. "Everytime James took Alice to bed, everytime someone we knew was sold and we saw them being beaten before they left the market, everytime we watched people die in cages, I thought of my father." Her smile was watery but it was real. "I thought of how much he loved me. I remembered what it was like to have parents who loved you. His memory reminded me that not everything in this world is wrong and broken."

I had a horrible feeling I knew where she was heading with her explanation. I also knew that there was no way to challenge the truths she was speaking now. "Edward, you have to become someone's father. It is not something you are entitled to automatically."

Her words hit an unknown nerve. I had not even considered that side of things. But now I thought of all the time and effort Carlisle had put into raising us. "And...it has to be more important than...us?" I struggled over the words.

Bella's chin trembled again, "Exactly." She was trying to smile but tears were threatening.

I pressed my lips to hers for a moment, "If I could change..."

"You can not," she said.

For a long moment I just looked at her and my heart ached. I wasn't meant to have her and I had to accept it. Being with her would mean becoming someone Bella couldn't think well of. If she couldn't think well of me how could she love me?

I swallowed hard, I was wasting what little time I had with my Bella. She didn't seem to be in any rush though. She was just staring at me and smiling sadly. There was one more thing I needed to know. "Did Jasper speak to Alice tonight? I hoped he would still be here when I returned."

Bella's smile became wider, "She didn't want to tell me at first. I think she was afraid that her happiness would hurt me."

I considered how jealous I was of Jasper. No matter how happy I was that he was happy I couldn't quite squash the envy. "Does it?" I asked quietly.

Bella didn't seem to have the same problem, her smile was genuine. "How can it? If anyone has earned the chance to be happy, it's her." Bella bit her lip, "The things she went through..." Her eyes filled with tears and she stared at my chest. "She thought I didn't know how bad things sometimes got with James. I didn't know...at first. I was young and foolish. But..."

"Bella stop, it doesn't matter now." It was over and James was dead. My arms tightened around her.

"I tried to make a deal with him once. Alice was asleep, he came to wake her up and I tried to make a deal. But he said no. He liked..." Her voice trailed off and I could see the revulsion there.

I tried to keep the same look off my face. It wouldn't do anything to make Bella feel better. "He liked her because she looked so young. I know. Alice told me."

"She did?" Bella sounded surprised, "She never told me. James did."

Unless I was very much mistaken, she sounded hurt, "She wanted to protect you Bella."

"She has always protected me. I wish I could protect her the same way." She sighed heavily.

I was amazed by how blurred Bella's understanding of Alice was despite their closeness. I could understand perfectly. "You did, but in a different way."

"How?"

"Your father reminded you that there was good in the world. You reminded Alice. As long as she could keep you safe, there was something worth staying alive for." I kissed her forehead. I felt the same way.

The tears that had been threatening overflowed onto her cheeks and I wiped them away gently. After a moment she kissed me, "We don't have a lot of time..."

I pulled her to me tightly and kissed the top of her head, "Just let me hold you for a while."

XXX

On my final morning in Rome I went to see my father first. He looked as though he hadn't slept when he saw me into the house. I only had a few seconds to hope that I wasn't the cause of his distress. He didn't even bother to give me a proper greeting. "Edward, my son are you sure?" Carlisle had not looked this distraught since I had first told him I planned to marry Tanya, apparently he had been able to see through my act last night.

"This is the right thing to do." I tried to make my voice steady. It would do not good to show my father how I felt. He would only worry even more and I would be miles away; unable to reassure him.

"But..."

I cut him off, "Bella would not be able to love me if I was the kind of man who divorced his pregnant wife." I hoped my father would take this as a cue to let the matter rest but I was not so lucky. It wasn't that I didn't want his advice, it was just that I couldn't talk about this now.

The sorrow in his eyes was almost enough to break my control, "I'm sorry Edward. I wish it was better for you."

I wished it was too, "It is as it is." I said heavily, trying not to sound too angry about it.

"Is there anything I can do?"

I almost didn't ask him. It was too dishonourable, but I asked him anyway. "There is something."

"Of course."

"Watch over Bella as best you can." I felt my face heating as I spoke. This should not be my first request, but it was. "I don't know what will happen today, and I doubt she will be alone...but I would feel better if I had your word."

Carlisle reached over and squeezed my shoulder, "You have my word, son."

"And Tanya of course." I added quickly. I hadn't forgotten her. "I told her to stay in bed this morning. She was feeling faint."

"Of course."

I got to my feet. I had the promise I wanted and now I needed to leave. I had things to do. I got almost as far as the door when I sighed and told him the truth. I wasn't used to lying to my father. "I feel as though I am making a mistake. But I don't know what else I can do."

Carlisle didn't come any closer but I heard his breathing hitch, "I understand."

I turned back and smiled as I opened the door, "I know you do."

XXX

My third destination was Emmett's home, and as luck would have it Jasper was there too. He was visiting with Rosalie and he was happier than I had ever seen him. Rosalie was laughing as he read her a book of funny poetry, but when I made my entrance they both stopped abruptly. "No need to stop on my account. Please continue." I waved my hand.

Rosalie was not fooled and she reached out. I planted a kiss on her hand and sat next to her. She was still confined to her bed, but her mood had yet to suffer. She seemed capable of finding endless comfort in the contemplation of motherhood. Her only point of concern was me, "What am I going to do without you? How are we all to bear your going?"

"You bore it before and you will again Rose." I said with a smile as I placed a kiss on her hand.

She held onto my hand a moment longer than necessary and squeezed my fingers, "I'll miss you regardless."

"I'll miss you all." I said and if my smile had become brittle no one said anything. I sat down next to Jasper, "Where's Emmett?"

"He went to the market. I need more fruit and only he gets it right." She smiled happily and I fought the urge to laugh. The first time I had felt such an urge in days.

"There's something I need to tell you." I said to Jasper.

"And that is?" Jasper looked relaxed and happy. Bella said his conversation with Alice had gone well and here was the proof.

I enjoyed the moment. I was going to make a friend very happy. I tried not to resent the fact that I would never be that happy again. "I freed Alice today." I said and I managed to smile genuinely.

Jasper's mouth widened into a ridiculous grin, "Thank you brother." He reached out and clasper my shoulder. "From the bottom of my heart, thank you."

"Things went well with her then?" I asked innocently.

Jasper blushed and Rosalie threw up her hands in irritation. She was on the scent of gossip, "What are you talking about?" She demanded.

"Well, I can tell you now I suppose." He took a deep breath to prepare himself for Rosalie's reaction, whatever it was. "I have decided to marry Alice."

Rosalie just looked blank for several seconds and I could tell she had no idea who Alice was. I was about to remind her when she suddenly said, "Edward's slave? That Alice?"

"Yes, but she's not my slave anymore." I took out the piece of paper which confirmed Alice's freedom.

For a moment there was a ringing silence as Rosalie processed our words. "You know, that wonderful girl saved a very expensive dress of mine. She seems so nice." She smiled at Jasper and he let out a breath he had been holding.

"I'm glad you think so. I want you to like her."

Rosalie squeezed Jasper's hand, "I'm sure I'll love her."

Jasper brought the hand to his lips and planted a delicate kiss their, "I certainly hope so." After a moment he turned to me, "Will I be taking Bella as well?"

He asked the question as delicately as he could and I hoped Rosalie wouldn't imply anything from his tone. "I'm not sure. It's her choice."

"Is...have you not freed her?"

"Not yet."

XXX

I pushed open the door of the courtyard for the final time, for the forseeable future at least. I only had one more hour in Rome before I had to go and meet the legion. I could hear Alice laughing in the kitchen, but I couldn't hear any other voice. I went and pushed open the door. Bella was there, she was peeling vegetables. Alice was scrubbing robes in a large pail.

I smiled at the scene and cleared my throat to annouce my presence. Alice looked to me immediately. Bella just turned in my direction but kept her eyes down, her face was disturbingly blank. My gaze rested for a moment on the floor and it seemed impossible I had had her so recently. It seemed like a lifetime ago. Suddenly I wasn't sure what to say, but I knew I couldn't speak to Bella with witnesses. "Alice," I said with a smile. "You're free." I held out the paper I had been given by the registrar.

She stared at it for a full five seconds. The imp was rendered speechless for the first time. She took the paper from me but she couldn't seem to look at it. Instead she was staring at me in disbelief. "Free?" I could see the beginnings of a smile but it only lasted a moment. Her eyes flickered to her friend.

"Jasper returned with me and he is waiting in the courtyard to speak to you. I would like to speak to Bella a moment." Alice hesitated but she finally nodded.

"Of course. I'll be in the courtyard," she said with a smile. I could see her joy was mixed with caution. Her words had been a non-too-subtle way of telling Bella was she wasn't about to run away with Jasper and leave her friend behind.

Once she had gone I turned to Bella in earnest. "I understand your feelings Bella and I won't try to change your mind but I need to speak to the real you. I need to speak to my Bella just for a moment."

The blank look that had been on Bella's face held for only a second, then she said, "What is there left to say Edward?"

Her eyes met mine and I saw how much this was hurting her. She was going to miss me as much as I missed her. With a groan I crossed the kitchen and pulled her into my arms. She didn't fight me but she didn't respond either. I didn't care. Her morals were holding her in place not her feelings. I knew she wanted to be here with me. "Not much, you're right, there's very little left to say." I stroked her cheek with my thumb for a moment. I would miss the feel of her skin. "I...When I went to free Alice today I..." Now that I was here with her I felt embarassed. It had been simple at the time. I had stood before a man at a table and I had paid for Alice's freedom. It had been on the tip of my tongue to request another transaction, but I just couldn't say the words.

If I freed Bella she would have to find a husband. Some Roman women were able to support themselves in business, but freed slaves were different. They had fewer rights and if they were to survive, they needed protection. As I stood there about to pay for Bella's freedom I had frozen. Then I had thanked the man and left.

Bella had only two options. Be a slave or someone's wife. I didn't like either option, but I couldn't deny that while the first option was unpalatable, the second was horrible. I couldn't actively send Bella away. Impossible.

I cleared my throat and took a purse from my pocket. I handed it to Bella. "There is enough to secure your freedom in there. You can go...whenever you want." I struggled with the words but I forced them out resolutely. "And there should be enough to...help you manage with whatever you want to do."

Bella's mouth dropped open, "But I...I can't accept this it's ridiculous."

"Bella," I said. "Who is the Dominus here?" I tried to drag a smile onto my face but I thought it probably looked more like a grimace. I couldn't stay here with her much longer. If she opened that purse and saw the amount of money there she would probably be even more horrified.

"You're the Dominus, Edward," her voice broke as she said my name. "But there is no need..." I pulled her to my chest and held her tight, cutting her speech short. She was going to accept it whether she liked it or no.

"Bella, I am no great orator and I don't know how to say what I want to say. I never seem to know what to say to you. It always comes out sounding foolish or we misunderstand each other." We had a great history of doing just that and I could see that Bella remembered that too. She was biting her lip but I thought I saw a ghost of a smile. I moved a hand to stroke her cheek and I saw her eyes fill with tears. "But I want you to know, I have never loved...anything, as I love you."

She gave a whimper and I almost stopped. I didn't want to see her cry just before I left, but I still wanted to tell her the truth. "I would sacrifice anything to be with you, anything except your good opinion and that would be the price." Bella tried to drop her eyes but I wouldn't let her. I held her chin gently. "I will never stop dreaming of you as the mother of my children."

Tears fell down her cheeks and she closed her eyes. I kissed her forehead and was about to let her go when her arms came around me. She clutched at my back as she had the last time I had had her. Bella sobbed quietly for a few seconds into my neck and I stroked her hair. "I love you too Edward. So, so much" she whispered and I almost changed my mind.

I could sweep her out of the kitchen, onto Seth and we could be out of Rome in an hour. Perhaps we could go to Capua and live there. Bella's new purse had fallen to the floor but I would take that too. I would leave everything else behind for Tanya to do with as she saw fit...

And there the fantasy ended, because that was all it was: a fantasy.

For some minutes I just held Bella, I wasn't sure how I was going to be able to let her go and I knew she didn't want me too. I could have stayed there forever and might have done so, but I heard someone calling my name.

Bella jumped as though she had been scalded and released me quickly. It was Tanya and her voice was coming from the courtyard. Bella's eyes were swollen and red and I knew I had seconds only. "I'll keep her away," I whispered. Then, acting on impulse I pressed my lips to her forehead. "Remember us, my love."

Not daring to look at her again, I spun on my heel and marched out of the kitchen. Alice and Jasper were still in the courtyard as Alice had promised she would be and I nodded to them with a good imitation of a smile. Alice expression was an odd mixture of excitement and anxiety and I hoped she would be able to allay her fears soon. Jasper just looked happy, Tanya's expression however was the opposite.

"You're leaving me then," she said and I realised she was close to tears too.

"I will return soon, no more than six months in all likelihood. It should only be a short campaign." I tried to make my tone as reassuring as I could. It was no mean feat when my heart was still pounding as though it would break free of my chest.

"That's what you said last time," Tanya reminded me with a sigh.

I made an effort to try and seem kinder. I took her hands in mine, "You have enough things to be thinking about at the moment. You'll have Didyme and Esme to help you and the time will fly." I pressed a kiss to her lips, "It will seem like a day."

Tanya gripped my hands and pressed her lips together, "As you say husband."

I kissed her again and promised again to return soon. Then I held out a hand to indicate Jasper and Alice, Tanya seemed to notice for the first time the way he clung to her hand. "And you will also welcome a new member of our extended family. Jasper has asked for permission to marry Alice and I have freed her."

Tanya's eyes widened in shock and her mouth started to open. I wasn't sure if she intended to say anything or not, but I didn't give her the chance. "There will be no further discussion on the matter. Bella may decide to stay or if she and Alice wish to remain together I have given my consent for her sale to Jasper." I fixed my wife with a serious stare, "If she wishes to leave, do not prevent her please Tanya. Jasper and I will agree a price when I return." My words were pleasant but I made sure my tone spoke volumes. Tanya's cheeks were starting to flush and so I kissed her again quickly, "Good bye, Tanya. I'll be home before you know it." Then I quickly turned to Alice and Jasper.

They were watching me with expressions of such sincere concern that Tanya was sure to notice something was wrong. "Why so glum? You should be celebrating."

Alice looked undecided for a moment, then she reached out and embraced me, "Thank you, for everything."

I couldn't think of anything to say. The simple gratitude in her voice was overwhelming and I felt humbled that Alice would still thank me when I had damaged her friend's life so much. In the end I simply returned the embrace and looked to Jasper, "I'll see you soon, brother?"

Jasper nodded, "My last campaign as well."

I smiled and nodded. I wondered if Jasper hadn't already committed himself whether he would have gone at all. Probably not. After a few more goodbyes Michael appeared at my side with an apologetic expression and I knew I had to leave. At the door I turned and took one last look around and saw Bella. She was standing in the doorway of the kitchen and I was glad Tanya was weeping elegantly into a handkerchief. I was able to stare at her for a whole second, before I had to leave.

XXX

**A/N Next chapter might come a little quicker because these two are only short. You'll see what I mean. So, what do we think? Is Edward doing the right thing? Is he insane? How will Alice and Bella handle things without their Dominus? What about Jasper and Alice? It's all going on...**

**P.S. I've only got seven minutes to update before Tuesday is over. If it's a few minutes late I beg your forgiveness.**


	9. Chapter 9

**A/N Hello all, I've finally managed to get five minutes to myself to update. Yay me. First of all though, apologies for not adding an extra update as promised. Things kind of got away from me this weekend, as things sometimes do.**

**I'm going to try and not make this A/N too epic, but there were a few question's PM'd to me that I think need answering.**

**Q. When is the story set?**

**A. At the beginning of the first chapter it is somewhere in 26 BC. Ceasar Augustus is the first Emperor of Rome and ironically his reign was a time of relative peace. Though there was a five year period with wars ongoing that Augustus used to expand the empire he had (a lot) and this was between 30 BC and 25 BC. Obviously the calendar was different but you get the idea. **

**The legion would have been fighting in Egypt before the beginning of the story, when that ended they were allowed to return to Rome. Now they are in the Alps battling with the Salassi tribe for control of a mountain pass (Great St. Bernard, yes seriously). The route was important as it was the shortest route between Italy and the Upper Rhine. Augustus will win, obviously...cause he, you know, did.**

**I could have gone into the history and politics of Rome at the time but hell, that's a lot of background information. It seemed more fun to get them naked.**

**Q. Is it easy to get a divorce at this time in history?**

**A. This is my bad as I should have considered that this information would have been helpful. The answer is yes. I'll add something to a chapter to clarify, but it was actually amazingly simple then. Marriages could disolved between citizens with a word. The idea being that a true marriage could only exist if both parties were willing. There were financial implications with dowries and land being returned etc. But it was all very easy.**

**Makes Edward even more of a dummy if you ask me.**

**I hope that helps to clarify.**

**Thanks to all my reviewers. Special nods to x123 and weekitty who have been here since the get go. They must get so sick of waiting for me to update. Thanks to Katiej1477 who seems to like me putting Edward in awkward positions. Thanks to vhawk730, Liz2009 and twithish who always seem eager for more.**

**Thanks to Kgunter34 and sujari6 who have no trouble understanding how stupid men can be when they make all their own decisions. It's the power, it goes to their heads.**

**Hello and thank you to Cockerspanmom and frostedglaze who joined the reviewing party. And to t3r35a22 who is the nicest reviewer anyone could have.**

**So, after promising a non epic A/N I've failed again. I'll shut up now and get on with the story shall I? Yes, let's.**

**Much love**

XXX

Chapter nine

One year later-25BC

Six months had been a very optimistic estimate on my part. Though there was still constant talk of the battles coming to an end, it hadn't happened yet. Men still poured into the tents bleeding and broken from fighting and I still fixed them as best I could.

They also came in frozen from the cold, screaming with the pain coming from their extremities. I had had to perform more amputations for the snow bitten than the wounded. It was so cold here. The soldiers said it was because the high mountains hid us from the mercy of our gods. That seemed unlikely to me but perhaps they were right. If there were places where the god's didn't hold sway this would be one of them. It was so very different to my last campaign in the heat. That climate had it's own set of problems, of course, but here was...hell.

The isolation made it hard for us to get more supplies when we needed them and we spent a lot of time relying on the best hunters in our legion to keep us fed. I had been forced to improvise many times, making willow tea for those with sickness and fever from tree bark. There was little else I could for them.

After only two months here, a disease had spread through the camp. Many had become ill, but only six had died. Unfortunately the other two doctors had been among them. I was left alone to try and cope with the influx of those needing my help. It was a constant and unending river of pain and blood and there were moments when I felt sure I would never be myself again.

Whenever I felt this way, almost as though he had sensed it, Jasper would come to help me. He still spent most of his time with the others in battle but I was able to justify his presence by my side when needed. After all I was trying to doctor an army almost single handed with only wounded soldiers to help me.

He would help me treat patients, move those that needed to be moved, clean those who needed to be cleaned and sometimes hold down those who needed that. If it ever weighed on him as it weighed on me he didn't show it. I suspected that although he shared my horror at our current surroundings, he was thinking of other things. Most likely his wife who was waiting for him. I knew Tanya would be waiting for me too, but the thought didn't offer me the same solace.

I knew there was something else I could think about while I was here; something that would make me feel better and worse all at the same time, but I did not. I didn't want to think of my beautiful Bella when I was surrounded by blood and death.

After hours and hours on my feet, when I literally couldn't keep my eyes open, I would go back to my tent and try to sleep for an hour. Before I closed my eyes, I would think about her. Just for a few moments I would allow myself to remember her. I would think of her hair shining, I would remember how she looked lying on her side asleep, I would imagine her body curled in front of mine... It was a simple thing to do, but it gave me the strength to get up and go back into the other tent.

I didn't know where she was now for sure but Jasper had given me a little news when he had arrived, only a nine days after me. He told me that he had married Alice two days after I freed her. Esme and Rosalie had risen to the occaision spectacularly. He spent time telling me how they had hired decorators and painters to ready the house. They had ordered more food than he had ever seen in one place, hired musicians and kept the wine flowing freely. Jasper had tried to protest the expense but it was to no avail, had I been there I would have warned him not to even try. Jasper was family and they would not let his wedding pass uncelebrated.

I took a lot of satisfaction in the hearing of it. Hearing how Alice had loved her wedding day and how the family had immediately loved her was wonderful. My grandfather Aro had not deigned to attend, but he had sent a note of congratulations anyway. It was quite significant for him; a note of his deep regard for Jasper.

I listened to the whole story with rapt attention, fighting the urge to ask about Bella. It would have been unkind to act as though I didn't care about sharing in his happiness and it was not true anyway. It was only that the weeks I had spent away from her travelling had been some of the worst of my life. I was desperate for news of her and after some time Jasper brought her into the conversation himself. Alice had insisted on Bella standing at her side for her wedding of course. I seized on the topic and asked as calmly as I could how she fared.

I was surprised to learn that despite his new bride's pleas, Bella had insisted on remaining in my house. "What?" I had asked surprised. I hadn't been able to free her myself, my selfishness had prevented me, but I had assumed it would be something that she would want.

"Alice said that Bella was determined and she couldn't get her to change her mind. And I'm sure you know..." he said with raised eyebrows.

"How persuasive Alice can be? I can imagine." I had taken several deep breaths in an attempt to keep my voice steady before I asked, "Did Alice say why Bella chose to stay?"

Jasper smiled and I could see the sympathy plain on his face, "That was a very nice attempt at almost casual Edward. I actually don't know why Bella did what she did. We would have made her very welcome of course. When Alice failed to persuade her I sought her out privately on the day of the wedding. I was concerned she might be apprehensive about living with me."

"Why should she be?"

"Well, several possibilities occured to me at the time. I wondered if she thought that Alice was forcing me to take her in, which of course was untrue," Jasper clapped me on the shoulder. "Whether for you, or Alice or because of how good a woman Bella is, I would have been happy for her to live with us."

"Thank you brother," I said.

Jasper just shrugged, "Or perhaps she might have felt like she was intruding. Either way I reassured her that was not the case and she thanked me. Then she told me that her mind was made up." Jasper grinned and I couldn't let it go.

"What else?" I asked.

"Then she said she was glad that Alice had found someone like me."

I couldn't not smile at him. It had sounded so like something she would say. But that was the only news I had had of her. She had returned to my house, but for all I knew she might have left by now. I wrote to her and to Tanya of course.

I wasn't sure if I was right to send Bella letters but I didn't feel I could just pretend I wasn't thinking of her. Besides, I wondered how she would feel if Tanya was constantly receiving news from me and she got nothing. So, I wrote to her, though I sent Bella's letters enclosed in ones I sent to my father, trusting that he would know what to do with them. If she was still there. I hadn't received any letters myself and nor had anyone else. It was not surprising given our situation and I just had to hope that mine were reaching the right people.

I comforted myself that nothing would happen to Bella as long as Alice was in Rome. Alice who now had the full support of my family (according to Jasper), and the full resources of Jasper himself. She would keep her friend safe and I would have to trust Alice to do the same thing she had been doing all her life.

When I looked at it objectively I knew that Alice had done much better than I ever had.

XXX

The dead man lying on the stretcher in front of me had the same colour hair as Tyler. He had the same jaw too, the same eyes...I dropped to my knees and put my head in my hands. My friend had died before I had even been able to get to him. There was a dreadful sound in the tent, one that I had been getting used to, it was the quiet moaning of men dying. Tyler would not make a sound again. He would never laugh at me, joke with me, or call me 'brother'. I heard a rattling sound from my chest.

I sat staring at Tyler and felt as though my whole body was frozen. I couldn't do this anymore. Everywhere I looked there was blood, on men, on cloth, it had even soaked into the skin of my hands. When I looked at them in the candlelight, I saw a fiend's hands.

These were the hands that tried to help but couldn't seem to work fast enough. Someone groaned loudly from the other side of the tent and the pain in the voice made me shudder. It was too much for any one man. My shoulders were shaking although my face was dry and I fought for control. I just needed to take a few minutes. I needed to calm down and then I could carry on. I wished Jasper was here and then felt guilty. He was in the same company as Tyler and would be in as much danger. I shouldn't be concerned with what I needed right now.

I felt someone shaking my shoulder and I looked up. One of the soldier's, who had lost an eye recently, was gesturing helplessly towards the men who needed me and I felt so tired. Consul Murena had assured me he had sent a request for help but we both knew how unlikely it was that we would get any. Even if the letter reached its destination and it was by no means certain that it would.

My eyes slid to the man next to Tyler. The man was gasping and I knew his lungs were damaged. Had we been in Rome I might have been able to save him. I could have reinflated the collapsed one and he might have survived his injuries. Here I knew he would probably die. What truly frightened me was that although my brain knew it was sorry for the man, I couldn't feel any sorrow for him.

This place, this constant stream of death was stripping me of any sense of compassion. It had been dulled in order to protect my sanity entirely without my noticing. As the man gave another gasp I got to my feet. I would feel it later. Now I would keep going. I turned to the soldier who was still looking helpless. "Fetch fresh water," and I was amazed by how calm I sounded.

The soldier nodded, looking relieved to have been given an order and hurried off. I got to work. I stiched and bound, I washed and strapped and I. Kept. Going.

The next time I looked up the sun was peaking over the horizon. I had been distracted by sounds of celebration coming from outside the tent. Judging by how close the voices were, I had to sincerely hope they were Roman.

I was about to send someone to find out what was happening when the tent flap was pushed aside and two men entered carrying a stretcher. I could see at least three other pairs coming towards us. I sighed and braced myself for more patients I couldn't help.

As I moved towards them the soldier closest to me looked up and smiled. The smile halted me in my tracks. I hadn't seen an expression like that on anyone's face for some time. It was a smile that spoke of joy. Joy had been long absent here. "Report," I said to the soldier.

"It's almost over, Sir. We're almost done." The soldier carrying the other end of the stretcher nodded his head and I noticed the same smile on his face.

"They're been saying that for some time now soldier," I said wearily. I hated to ruin his mood, but false hope was not a good thing.

"But it's true sir," the second soldier volunteered. "The chief has been captured. Their villages are routed. They are scattering to the mountains and Consul Murena has sent most of our soldiers to round them up for slaves."

"Do you speak the truth soldier?" I asked my heart beginning to pound in my chest. I had begun to think that this campaign would never end.

"Yes sir," the first soldier was nodding his head frantically. "An order has been issued to capture only men of age, but we still think we'll end up with over forty thousand. We're going to be rich sir! We can go home."

I clapped the man on the soldier and turned to convey the news only to discover that the other men, walking or otherwise were already listening. No one seemed to know what to say, "I'm sorry sir." The first soldier shifted awkwardly, "But can we put these men..."

"Of course," I said hurriedly. My body seemed marvellously awake for the first time in months and I wanted to get back to work. Now that I could see an end I found myself buoyed up. The stretchers started to come in and I was pleased to notice that stitches would more than suffice for most of the wounds. My good mood lasted until I reached the fifth stretcher.

Jasper was unconscious and there was blood all over his tunic. As soon as I reognised his face beneath the mud I yelled for my helpers. It took them seconds to recognise the man as my friend; the one who came to help the wounded. They were instantly ready to help in return.

For the second time in one incredibly long day, I dropped to my knees next to the bloody body of a friend and oddly my first thought was of Alice. The little imp who had been through so much. She had lost everything and still fought to protect someone she loved. She had found Jasper, who was worthy of her; a man who would spend his life making her happy.

I could not let her lose him. Not after everything I had been through with Bella, wanting her so desperately had been bad enough. What if I had married her only to have her die? The thought alone made my heart shudder in my chest. I would not let it happen. For all of our sakes and so this whole damn mess would be worth something, I was going to save my friend. Someone deserved to be happy. My hands were instantly checking his breathing (shallow), his heart (weak) and trying to discover the source of the bleeding.

It didn't take me long. He had a large and very deep gash in one of his wrists, quite close to his hand. The tribe who lived in these hills were not particularly well equipped, but they were ferocious and fearless. I could see it as clearly as if I'd been there. A native armed with a crude knife, Jasper defending himself. He would most likely have been the victor, otherwise there would be injuries to other more vital areas.

It didn't seem as though it was going to matter who had won between them though. Jasper's skin was as white as alabaster and I knew he was losing blood quickly. A crude tourniquet had been tied around his wrist and I wondered if he'd had the presence of mind to do it himself. It wouldn't surprise me.

I told my helpers to bring me needle and thread and I set about trying to decide where to begin. His hand and wrist were such a mess. The blade had been forced between the bones and then been pulled forward. I though it likely that Jasper's attacker had gotten his knife stuck and needed to free it. The result was a mangle of skin, flesh and tissue. There was blood coming from two or three locations and I wasn't sure but I thought his little finger and the one next to it might have already died from the lack of it.

"Wait," I called to the two men scurrying to fetch the things I had asked for. It took me a moment to find the words but my voice was strong, "Bring me the big knife and the saw. Then one of you fetch the disc from the fire."

XXX

Four more men died that day and during the night, but Jasper was not one of them. When I could no longer stand I didn't go back to my tent. Instead, as the sun rose again, I went to my friend's side and lay down on the floor next to him. I wasn't sure if I would be able to sleep but I had to rest if only for a little while. I reached out and checked Jasper's heartbeat and his breathing. Neither was good, but I was sure they were improving.

I had strapped what was left of his right wrist to his chest so he wouldn't cause himself any damage in his sleep. The bandage had a small spot of blood on it but I knew the bleeding had stopped now. I flinched as I remember the pained sound Jasper had made, even unconscious, when the disc touched his skin. I would remember it until the day I died. I was certainly not numb anymore, I was feeling everything now.

They floor was hard and cold but I didn't care. My feet were screaming in pain anyway, and my back throbbed mercilessly, I didn't see how much worse I could feel. I took a deep breath and tried to remember Bella, her hair, her smile...but although I could see her, just behind her was Jasper's hand, the hand I had been forced to remove to save his life.

I had vowed to myself as I performed the opertation, that I would never regret my decision, but I couldn't imagine how my friend would feel when he awoke and realised what had happened to him. What I had done to him. I wondered if he would be angry with me.

The only consolation was that now Jasper would return to Rome. He would not be allowed to stay now and I intended to make sure that he received his share of the spoils in gold before I sent him on his way.

If the soldier's who had brought the wounded were correct, perhaps I would also be able to leave soon. I tried to imagine going home, sleeping in a bed and being able to take a real bath. I thought of Tanya who was sure to have had our child by now. Then I thought of Bella again and her smiling face was clear.

Would she still be living at my house? How could she want that? I tried not to let myself hope that she was waiting for me. After all, everything had been said between us hadn't it? There was nothing more to do. But then why hadn't she left straight away?

XXX

When I awoke I discovered that I was lying on a stretcher bed. I couldn't remember how I had gotten there but I was covered with a blanket and felt much more comfortable than I usually did. The dull pain in my head, the one I had gotten used to, was much less pronounced today. My feet still ached but I knew I wouldn't wince when I stood, and even my back had improved.

I was momentarily disoriented as I took in all of these developments. Then the events of the previous day came back to me in a rush. My neck twinged as I turned my head to locate Jasper. He was not on either side of me.

I was halfway to my feet when I heard my friend's voice, "...now gently tie it off...you have it. That should be fine."

A second later I saw him. He was watching one of the soldiers stitch together a wound. Jasper was on his feet, he still looked pale and he was leaning against a chair for support. His expression, however, was perfectly alert as he watched one of my helpers tie a thread. Without speaking I got up and went to his side. Jasper saw the movement out of the corner of his eye and smiled at me, "Hello brother. Do you feel better?"

The stump that had once been a hand was still strapped to his chest and I was pleased to note that there was no more blood than last night. A good sign. In truth I didn't need my medical training to know that Jasper would recover. He was strong. I managed to smile back at him, "I...I do. And you brother? How are you feeling?"

Jasper gave me a wry smile, "I'm alive and I hear I owe that to you. Thank you Edward." He said graciously with a nod of his head.

"Jasper I..." the words started to rush out of me but Jasper held up his one hand and I stopped.

"Don't think of apologising brother. I thought I was going to die today. I thought my life was going to end in the mud of this awful place, while I was alone and in agony." He shurgged, "I'm alive. I get to go home soon to my wife. We are more than level." He held up his left hand awkwardly but he was still smiling. I grasped it and pulled him into a gentle embrace being careful not to touch his arm.

I hadn't been aware how much I had been afraid of Jasper's reaction. I should have known better. "So you heard?" I asked. "That the fighting's over. The campaign is won."

"I heard. I'm more than delighted. I hate this place," he said with a humourless laugh.

My eyes trailed over the other patients. "It doesn't seem a fair trade," I said quietly.

"I know, but Edward, you saved as many of them, of us, as you could. No one could have done more."

I nodded but I didn't trust myself to speak. I couldn't ask if Jasper knew about Tyler yet. Not today; it was too cruel. Instead I shook myself and prepared for another day, then was surprised when I saw the darkness outside the tent. "How long have I been sleeping?"

"About fourteen hours," said Jasper as though it was perfectly sensible for me to have slept so long.

"Fourteen hours? Oh I curse myself to Dis. I should have been up, helping these men." I looked again at the soldiers lying patiently waiting for a doctor to help them. Perhaps they were all unconscious...or dead. I turned angrily to one of my helpers, "Why didn't you wake me?"

"Edward calm down." Jasper touched my shoulder and I felt myself relaxing a little. If Jasper could be calm at a time like this, I could manage it too. "They tried to wake you, they yelled your name but you wouldn't wake. Instead it woke me. I told them to put you on my stretcher bed and that I would help them."

"You?"

"No need to sound so shocked. If there had been anything serious I woud have found a way to rouse you. Primarily men have just needed water and stitches and willow tea. I've been watching you stitch wounds for ten years," he nodded to the wound that had been closed a few minutes ago. "I think we were doing all right."

I nodded, pleasantly surprised. It wasn't as neat as I would have managed but it would certainly suffice. "You did well boy." I said the the helper I had just snapped at.

"Th...thank you sir," he said sounding terrified of me.

I guessed that I might look quite ghoulish all things considered. After all I was still covered in the blood of maybe a hundred men, I had slept one good night in a year and I guessed my hair was standing up on end. "What's your name soldier?" I asked him.

"Ben sir, Ben Cheney of Rome."

"Well, maybe we'll all get to go back there soon," I said and I summoned a smile from somewhere.

"Yes sir, I hope so."

"Let's get these men some water shall we." I said as I rubbed my hands together. It was time to get back to work. Ben just nodded and hurried off.

Once we were alone I turned back to my friend. "Thank you Jasper, I had no idea I was so exhausted."

"You were next to dead from what I've been hearing. I was worried you might have succumbed to illness yourself at first. But then you started to talk in your sleep and you sounded perfectly normal."

"Oh? What did I say?" I was only mildly curious but I became more interested when Jasper dropped his eyes. "Jasper?" I prodded.

"You just said her name a few times, but it was as clear as you're speaking now."

I honestly couldn't think of a sensible thing to say to that. Jasper knew I still loved Bella and that even though we would return to Rome soon I still would not be able to be with her. As with Bella herself, it had all been said. So I hid behind my role. "I think you should rest, I'll handle the next few hours."

"I want to help..." He began, but this time I cut him off.

"I'm already sending you back to Rome with a piece missing and I refuse to make Alice any angrier with me." I pointed determinedly at the bed I had vacated. "Doctor's orders."

Jasper rolled his eyes and I was delighted to see that he was still himself. Jasper was still in one piece in every way that mattered, "I was managing just fine until you woke up." He was saying. Regardless of his indignation he was heading back to bed and I shooed him along. "Maybe you should sleep some more and I should do the doctoring." His eyes twinkled as he mocked me, "I just don't think you can handle it anymore Edward."

I felt almost giddy, "I'm sure I'll manage. You stick to your area of expertise. I'll save lives, you can stick things with bits of metal."

Jasper seemed as delighted as I was, perhaps he had thought I would treat him differently. He was wrong. "Well, given the success I had made of today I think we can assume I can do anything you can, apparently with one hand."

"Is that a fact?" I asked. Then I brought my hands together and clapped three times. "Go right ahead then."

"I hate you Edward Cullen," he said but he couldn't hide the small smile.

"I hate you too, Jasper." I said grinning back.

xxx

Jasper was given permission to return home and after I politely made the request, he was given a substantial sum in gold rather than slaves. It was not a request that was usually granted but the Consul agreed when he met my eyes. He was not a foolish man and he understood the situation I had been coping with for the better part of a year.

The first contingent to leave would be the most seriously injured guarded by a number of able-bodied men. Jasper balked at being included in the first list but I managed to persuade him to go along with it. It wasn't very difficult, Jasper wanted to get back to Rome.

I was in charge of getting the men ready to leave, and I delayed them until I was sure it would be safe for Jasper to travel a long distance. I didn't want him to set out and develop a fever three days into the wild.

Nothing of the sort presented itself. I checked his wound ever day and couldn't find a thing wrong. It was terribly painful for him of course and there were times, when he was in agony. It was the same for all the wounded soldiers. We could only give them what we had, when we had it.

All these things slowed down their departure but the day arrived none the less. Those who had lost legs and feet were loaded into wagons for the journey home. I had managed to secure a place for Jasper in one of them, but he immediately relinquished it to someone else. He insisted there was nothing wrong with his legs.

We said goodbye and embraced before he left. I pressed letters into his hand which he swore to deliver to the addressee's only. I wasn't so worried about those destined for my family, or Tanya. Less so about the one to Alice, but Jasper knew which one I meant and he promised to make sure Bella's got hers.

Writing a letter to her had been difficult. I hadn't known exactly what to say. I had settled for telling her of my imminent return. The letter had sounded so formal when I had read it back but I hadn't known what to change. I couldn't tell her how much I loved her, how much I missed her, not now. What if Jasper returned to Rome to find her married and happy? I didn't want to disturb her life...not if she was happy at least.

I tried to explain it all to Jasper; I didn't think I did very well but he seemed to understand and said he would use his best judgement. I had smiled and asked if that would really be his wife's best judgement. He had replied that her judgement was the best so there was no problem.

We had parted with smiles not sadness and I was glad to see him on his way. He could return to Alice and build a life with her. I couldn't go yet. I would have to stay with the legion until it returned to Rome as a whole and I had no idea as to when that might happen.

I considered the idea that it might be months or even years before I was finally allowed to return home. I decided if that turned out to be the case I would find a way live with it. Jasper would return home and I would thank the god's for that small mercy. I would go on.

But in the end my fears turned out to be unfounded. Only two weeks after Jasper had left, another legion arrived from the south to take over control of the mountain pass. They had fared better than us in the milder weather and in comparison they seemed almost fresh.

My legion of men, the ones who had fought for this land for a year, were delighted to be leaving it behind. Slaves were readied for transport, tents were packed and three doctors arrived with the new company. I almost wept at the sight of them. I could go home now and I wanted to get away from this place more than I had ever wanted anything. I received my pay in gold and obtained permission to leave as soon as possible.

If I had waited a week I might have gotten a letter from Jasper. then again it might never have reached me. Still, the letter would have been helpful as it turned out.

XXX

**A/N Only a little one, but there will be more later. I'm on it!**


	10. Chapter 10

**A/N Second update of the day with half an hour to spare. Who rocks? That would be me. Enjoy!**

Chapter ten

I didn't allow myself to believe that it was real until we crossed the river on the outskirts of Rome. Only then did it feel as though it might actually be happening. I was going home. The clear air and the cool scent of autumn convinced me as nothing else could have. I had been afraid I would smell nothing but death and rot from now on, even when I was nowhere near either. My fears were again, unfounded.

Everything seemed familiar and welcoming. These were the landscapes of my childhood and I felt as though they were celebrating my return, just as I was. I could see from the faces around me that a lot of the others felt the same. I happened to glance down at Ben, the one eyed soldier who had assisted me so faithfully, at one point and realised the wide smile on his face was a mirror of mine. Then I understood, everyone was wearing the same expression today: excited anticipation.

Families and friends awaited all of us. I had realised with a jolt when our journey began that I was on the road to becoming an uncle and a father. Rosalie and Tanya would both have had their babies by now. I was a father. The thought seemed much more real than it had when Tanya first told me.

I would have to find a way to make my life work with my wife. Though I had no idea how to go about it. As I thought more and more often of my child on the journey, I began to try to picture her, because for some reason I found myself convinced I had a daughter. But when I did I couldn't see Tanya in her features. I saw chocolate brown eyes and long brown hair.

It was disturbing and felt almost perverse. I wouldn't see anything of Bella in my child and my rational mind accepted it. She would probably be blond, if she didn't take after me. But I couldn't stop picturing her a certain way once I had started, I seemed determined to be irrational.

Though the time to indulge in such things was almost past. I glanced around me; checking my location and I knew I would be home within two or three hours. Soon, I would see for myself what my child looked like.

XXX

For a moment I hesitated outside the door of my courtyard; my home. My things around my feet. There wasn't much besides the gold I had been paid. It seemed as though I had been gone much longer than a year. So much had happened and it was odd that Rome had not been affected at all. I stood outside for a full minute and almost changed my mind. I could go and see Jasper first, or my brother. But that would be cowardly. Whatever lay on the other side of these doors, it was time to face it.

Would Bella still be here? What would my child truly look like? Would motherhood have changed Tanya? How would Bella feel about my having a child at all? I knew the answer to none of these questions and I couldn't put off finding them out forever. I heaved my bags onto my shoulders one last time and reached out a hand to push the door open.

The first thing to catch my attention was the quiet. The high walls had always muted the sounds of the city a little, but the silence was near complete. It was almost eerie. I hadn't known what to expect of course, but perhaps a child's cry? Or if Tanya and the infant were not at home, then Michael or...another slave.

After a few moments more the quiet began to unnerve me and I called out a greeting. Almost immediately there were sounds from the kitchen and Michael appeared in the doorway. He was startled at my sudden appearance but he was quick to remember himself. "Dominus," he said dropping to his knee.

I was momentarily confused. I had never demanded that my servants kneel before me. I expected a bow of the head but I had seen no value in forcing human beings to scrabble about on the floor. "Get up Michael," I said and he did as I asked. I considered asking him about his new greeting but he was flushing red and apologising. It didn't seem worth it as tired as I was from my journey. "Where is my wife?" I asked after considering which question I should ask first.

Before Michael could answer my question I was distracted. Two other young looking men had emerged cautiously from the kitchen. They, noting Michael's posture, hurried to his side and knelt before me. Keeping my composure I indicated that they should rise, "I do not like my slaves to kneel." I told them. Then I returned my attention to Michael. "Explain." I said simply.

"Dominus, this is Austin and his younger brother Mark. Domina bought them..." he thought for a moment, "Perhaps a year ago." The two young men dropped their heads as I glanced at them again. "She said she needed to replace Alice and Bella."

My head snapped up. If Tanya needed to replace Bella then it logically followed that she was not here. The breath I sucked in was silent and I didn't think anyone would have notcied, not that I cared at this moment. My heart felt as though it wouldn't beat again. I felt numb and for the first time I allowed myself to examine my true hopes. I had hoped she would still be here. I had hoped so desperately that I had almost convinced myself. But...if she wasn't here then where had she gone?

"Where..." I only managed one word before I heard the door opening. Tanya was back from wherever she had been and when she saw me stood in front of her, all the colour left her face.

"Edward," she whispered my name. "Jasper said you would be coming home soon but I didn't truly believe him."

I managed to summon a smile from somewhere, but I couldn't help but be underwhelmed at my own reaction. "He was correct. I'm home and I don't plan to leave again." I was pleased to note that my voice was without a tremor.

I went to take Tanya's hand in mine. Although she let me do so, I could feel the tenison rolling off her. She looked...different; not like I had expected. "I...I don't know what to say."

"Perhaps you could start with saying 'welcome home' to your husband?" I said, but I kept my smile in place.

Tanya returned it weakly and pressed her lips to mine, "Welcome home. I've missed you."

As I looked into her ice blue eyes I realised what it was about Tanya, that was not as I had expected. "Tanya, where is our child?"

If anything Tanya turned even paler and drew a ragged breath. She didn't answer me, instead she turned to Michael, "You can return to the kitchen." She said in an imperious tone I didn't care for. I didn't think I needed to look far to discover the source of all the kneeling I had encountered.

Still, I waited patiently until we were alone. As soon as the door closed Tanya's control slipped, "I...I didn't manage to birth the child Edward." She had taken her hand back and was now twisting her fingers together. "He came too early."

I felt an awful stab of guilt as I looked into my wife's eyes. She seemed distraught and I could understand why. Tanya had always wanted to be a mother. Peter had been unwilling to make her one for his own reasons, and I had denied her for years for mine. When she had finally conceived a child of her own, he had died.

She had been forced to go through the whole experience without a husband to help her through it, a husband who had thought of nothing but his mistress. I shuddered with horror at myself, "'He?'" I asked. It was the only question I would think of asking.

"Yes. That's...what I was told." She was still wrapping her fingers around themselves, while she stared at me intently. She was obviously waiting for some kind of reaction from me but I had no idea which one to give her. I was feeling too many things at once and many of them were overwhelming. I was horrified that there was still the question of Bella's whereabouts in my mind as well. There were other, much more treacherous thoughts beneath that one but I wouldn't consider them; any of them.

In an attempt to focus I pulled Tanya into my arms. She went willingly and I heard her let out a sigh of relief. "I'm truly sorry Edward."

I felt another stab inside my chest. It was not uncommon for Roman men to blame their wives when they lost children before birth. Fortunately I was a doctor and knew better. "There is no blame here Tanya. Sometimes babies aren't meant to be born. It was not your fault.

Tanya's body relaxed massively. She leant her head against my chest and I expected to hear tears, but after a few dry sobs she calmed. "I've felt so guilty."

I stroked her cheek with my thumb gently, "No blame."

She nodded a little then tried to find a smile. "I would love to try again Edward. Now that you're home we can. It'll be better this time."

I could tell that she wasn't only talking about her ability to bear a child. She was asking if we could try to make our marriage happier this time. I tried to speak, truly I did. The words just stuck in my throat and threatened to choke me. So instead of answering Tanya's question I pressed my lips to hers and kissed her until she was smiling widely.

XXX

Later that evening I made my way to my parents home, once again ensconced on Seth. He had whinnied happily at the sight of me and I had been delighted that he didn't even think to kneel. Thus far he was the only one who had welcomed me back enthusiastically.

Tanya had sat by me happily enough as I bathed and she had told me about the year I had missed. Rosalie had given birth to a son and was expecting another child already. Esme and Carlisle were thriving. I had several new cousins from my uncle Caius' daughters, and Rosalie and Esme had thrown a lavish dinner to welcome Jasper home recently.

If Tanya's lips had pursed slightly when she spoke of Alice I ignored it, if she sounded disapproving of the close friendship that had sprung up between Alice and Rosalie I pretended not to hear it. I was desperate for news of the imp. Not only had I missed her, but I had no doubt that she was my best hope for news of Bella.

I had tried to ask Tanya about her in a casual way, but she just said that Bella had run away soon after Jasper left to join me. If she had any other information, and I had no reason to think that she did, she didn't share it.

However there was a small part of my brain that doubted my wife's assertions, reasonable or not. Tanya had liked neither Bella nor Alice. With one of them gone, perhaps she had decided to rid herself of both while she could; while I was not there to stop her.

I had wanted to question Tanya further but I held back. There was no sense in causing an argument on the very day I returned. I had other ways of finding things out. Which was why I didn't spend the night of my homecoming at home. Tanya tried to persuade me to stay, but when she saw I was determined she didn't press the matter.

I had considered whether or not I should be doing this as I saddled Seth. Should I be tracking Bella down? What if she was happy and content wherever she was? What if she wasn't? It was a circular argument I had gone round many times recently and there was, as usual, no easy answer.

So I tried to convince myself that my motives were pure. I just wanted to make sure that Bella was safe, then I would let her go. If there was a tiny voice whispering in the back of my head; telling me that things were a little different now that I was not a father, I tried to ignore it. I'd been making a habit of ignoring things today.

With a sigh I dismounted and tied Seth outside the house. As I walked up the steps I considered how likely it was that my father would have any news of Bella. I had asked him to look after her as best he could and I knew that he would have tried. But if Bella had left my house with no warning, whatever the reason, then he might have found keeping his word impossible.

Then I tried to remember that I was about to see my parents for the first time in more than a year and I was glad. I knocked on the door and it was opened by a slave I didn't recognise, "Hello, I'm here to see my..."

"Edward?" My words were cut off by a shriek from nearby and I smiled. I knew that sound.

Rosalie appeared behind the unknown slave and almost knocked him over in her haste to throw her arms around me. I caught her and held her tight as she half laughed and half sobbed. I could feel a small hardness pressing into my stomach and realised that she must be at least a third of the way into her second pregnancy. But she was still Rose and she smelled wonderfully familiar and for a moment I just enjoyed being with her again, being with someone who felt like family. Someone who was truly thrilled I was home. "It's good to be home little Rose." I said with feeling.

She stood back from me and looked me up and down, her eyes were wet, "Edward, you're so thin." I'm sure I would have been treated to a lecture had my mother not chosen that moment to join us.

I was hugged tightly again and led into the house where Emmett was waiting with a huge grin and a baby in his arms. My nephew was a very good looking young man. He had Rosalie's eyes and his father's hair and when he saw me he grinned widely showing me one tooth.

Rosalie when to stand at her husband's side proudly and I smiled, "Who's this fine young man?"

"This is Edward...Edward," said Emmett and Rosalie nodded.

I was stunned and it showed on my face, "I...I don't know what to say."

"I know brother," said Emmett nodding seriously. "You're going to have to get used to being less handsome than another person."

"Oh well yes, that's obvious," I said with a shrug. But I couldn't keep it up. I smiled again and we all spent a few moments just being happy we were back together. I was so touched at my nephew's name that it took me a few moments to ask where Carlisle was.

"Your father should be back soon," said Esme handing me a cup of wine, "But I don't think we should wait to cheer your safe return." My mother shuddered delicately, "When I saw what had happened to Jasper I just...then when he said you were safe I almost didn't believe..."

Tanya had said something similar; about not believing I would make it home. Hearing it from my mother was even worse and I pulled her into another embrace. After a second I felt her sob, "No more Edward please. I can't bear it."

I planted a kiss on top of her head. "No more I promise," I said firmly. "I have done my part and I've had enough. Believe me." It was true. I wouldn't run away again. I would stay this time and face whatever life had for me next. It hadn't really done much good anyway. All my old problems were still here, waiting for me.

Carlisle returned home soon after and he had joined our celebration with enthusiasm. After an hour had passed I knew that I should be returning home, but I couldn't. Instead I waited for my chance to speak to my father. It came just after nightfall when Rosalie and Emmett left to take their son, Edward, home. We promised to see each other soon and when I saw a significant look pass between Esme and my sister in law I knew there would be a party.

Esme had excused herself, saying she had a headache, while trying valiantly not to wobble. My mother had been drinking on an emtpy stomach. I thanked the god's for their unusual level of mercy as my father and I were left alone.

Carlisle poured me another cup of wine while he gave instructions to the servants to take his wife something to eat and plenty of water. Once all was arranged he sat down opposite me. "So, are you glad to be home son?"

Despite our earlier jubilation at seeing each other again, I could see the tension in his shoulders and for a moment I didn't want to ask him. Carlisle knew, or suspected, that I wanted to know about Bella and he was hoping he was wrong. I could try and pretend that I had forgotten about her, but I had to know. I sighed heavily, "Do you know what happened to her, father?"

Carlisle looked pained for a moment but he didn't hesitate to answer me, "I don't. I'm sorry." He drained his cup and reached to refill it. "I visited your home every other day. I checked on Tanya and made sure I always took a moment to speak to Bella." Carlisle ran his hand through his hair and I recognised the source of my own habit, "Then one day, a few weeks after you left, she wasn't there. I assumed she was at the market, but the next time I asked Tanya about her. She told me that Bella had run away and she seemed very annoyed about it."

"Did you...believe her?" I asked, feeling more guilty by the second. "Do you think Bella ran away?"

"It seems odd I grant you. But Tanya's ire was genuine I'm sure of it. She was furious at Bella. Then two visits later..."

Carlisle voice trailed away, "Please, go on."

"Michael met me at the door and said that his mistress had begun to bleed in the night. They had sent for the doctor but he could do nothing. He gave her the correct advice, to rest and drink lots of water. I wanted to go in but Tanya had said no visitors. I could hear her crying so I forced my way past Michael."

"How bad was she?" I asked, not sure I wanted to hear the answer. It seemed so odd though, why she didn't want help from her family and friends?

"Very upset Edward," Carlisle shook his head. "There was nothing to be done though, it was already too late, the baby had gone from her during the night and she knew it. She just needed to...grieve. She wanted to be alone. I tried to persuade her to let me bring her here so Esme could care for her. Tanya just cried harder, she kept saying she didn't want to see anybody."

I sat still for several minutes just absorbing my father's words and letting myself feel all the guilt that was mine. I deserved it, "Father, I'm sorry." I said finally.

"Sorry for what?" He sounded utterly confounded.

"You failed." I said miserably, and a little dramatically.

"Failed at what? Edward, I don't understand."

"You set out to raise a good son, a good man; you failed."

"Edward, we did not fail. You are a..."

"Don't say it. Don't. It's a lie. You are telling me about my wife's suffering and still, I can not focus only on her. There is a part of my mind still wondering about Bella and whether I can call on Jasper and Alice tomorrow and try to find out if they know anything."

"Do you care about Tanya's pain?"

"Of course I do," I nodded. It was true. I felt terrible. I would be happy to suffer for both of us if only there was a way I could manage it. "I would give anything to have her happy. I want her to find some joy, to have the family she wants, but...I don't want to be the one to give it to her."

Carlisle drained his glass with a pained look, "Oh Edward, I just...I don't know what to say to help you."

I tried to disguise the sag of my shoulders. I hadn't expected a magic solution to my problems. "I understand."

"Whatever you choose to do, we're still all behind you. There's no question about it."

"I...I don't know what I'm going to do. But I don't have to know that yet. What I do know is that I have to find her. If I find her happy and healthy then I can stop; I can try and find a way to let her go finally. But while she is just gone all I can think about is..." I imagined Bella working at Eric's and shuddered. If she was in trouble somewhere I couldn't leave her.

"I understand Edward. You love her and you need to know she's safe."

I checked Carlisle's face and found nothing but concern for me there. "How can you be so good, father? How did you become this way and why am I not able to do the right thing even when it's hard?" I hoped I didn't sound too much like a whining child.

Carlisle poured himself another cup of wine. "I haven't always done the right thing, son."

"Oh?" It was a surprise to me if it was the truth and not just my father trying to make me feel better.

It didn't seem that way though, Carlisle was looking more uncomfortable than I had ever seen him. He passed his cup from hand to hand as he spoke. "I know I've always refused to go into details about my previous marriages, but I...I was not a good husband to my second wife."

"You weren't? How so?" I asked, fascinated at this unexpected insight into my father's life before I joined it.

"You must understand. I had been pressured into marriage once already and lost that wife in childbirth; the baby too. I felt terrible guilt over her death. I was a doctor after all, why could I not save my own wife? I couldn't help but wonder if I was being punished. After all, I had recited wedding vows I didn't mean. Perhaps I had angered the god's." I wanted to interrupt and tell him it was ridiculous to blame himself but he held up a hand.

"I don't think that way anymore. I learned to accept that sometimes bad things happen. I was finally getting my life back together...then there was Jane and she was so much younger than me. She was barely more than a child when she came fearfully to our bed on our wedding night. I...I couldn't do as I was supposed to Edward. She was afraid but she was willing and I couldn't do it." Carlisle shook his head as though the words he was speaking were so shameful he couldn't bear to think about them.

"Father, if it was as you say then it was not wrong." I tried to comfort him. After all, I couldn't imagine being forced to take a girl barely older than a child to bed.

"Perhaps not then. But Jane grew impatient, not for a long time but she did in the end. She was older and considered herself wiser and she wanted me to be a real husband to her." Carlisle shrugged helplessly, "I couldn't do it. And she grew to hate me for it. She knew, as did most everyone that the love of my life was Esme Volturi though I had never been allowed to marry her."

"I'm so sorry, father. I didn't know it had been so difficult. I always thought it was grandfather Aro who made it impossible for you to be together. Yet you were forced to marry too." I had never known my paternal grandparents and for a minute I was glad.

"My parents would have been overjoyed to see me marry a Volturi, but they knew that wasn't to happen. If I couldn't marry Esme, they considered it their duty to find me another wife and they did. Two of them. Two women I made miserable because I couldn't love them." Carlisle finished another cup of wine and sighed heavily as he poured another, "We stayed married until my parents were killed and then I offered her a divorce and money." My father shrugged, "She took the offer gladly and was remarried within two months." Carlisle raised his glass, "And I was so glad."

"And then you were finally able to be with mother," I said and I smiled. I didn't like to see my father this way; dwelling on hurtful things from the past. Not when I was the one dragging the memories to the surface.

"Exactly," and the cheer returned to his eyes. "Sometimes things seem hopeless for a long time before they get better."

"I hope you're right."

XXX

I awoke my first morning back in Rome feeling very unsettled. I wasn't sure why I felt that way at first and I looked down. Tanya was draped across my chest. The sun was already heating the room and where our skin touched I could feel stickiness. I wriggled uncomfortably out from under her and she whimpered in protest as I laid her head gently on the bed. I went toward the basin of water that had already been filled by Michael or one of the others.

It felt so good to be able to get out of bed and wash without worrying about using up water reserves. I may have splashed about a little too enthusiastically but I took pleasure in it none the less. As I dried my face I looked at Tanya.

When I had returned from my parent's house last night she had been waiting for me and I felt like an animal for whom a trap had been laid. She had been lying in bed naked and smiling at me when I entered our room and my heart sank slightly in my chest. I reminded myself that I had been expecting this but it wasn't exactly true.

My intentions had been to fix my relationship with Tanya for the sake of my son or daughter. I had left Rome to try and clear my mind of Bella so that when I returned I would be able to be a true father and husband. Now I felt as though the rules had been changed when I wasn't looking. I was not a father, Bella had disappeared and Tanya was naked in front of me wanting to try and have a child all over again.

My head felt so full of thoughts that I was amazed I was able to walk across the room. I wanted to lie in the dark and think for hours until i was able to figure out what to do. Instead I had gotten into bed and muttered some excuses about how tiring my trip home had been.

Tanya was not to be deterred and she told me she was sure she could help me to stay awake. Her mouth around me was not totally unexpected and despite my fears and worries it was hard to ignore. I wouldn't have had the energy to have actually lain with her but this took no energy on my part at all.

I had offered to reciprocate but Tanya would have none of it. She just kissed me and said that we had plenty of time. I was tired, she didn't mind... Now as I stared at her blond hair spread over the bed I felt a twinge of uneasiness. I imagined her lying here the day after she lost our child. Carlisle had said she had cried and refused visitors, but he had forced his way inside to make sure she was in no danger. He said she had just needed to grieve for the child she had lost...our son.

I remebered her fingers twisting together as she spoke to me...

_'I didn't manage to birth the child Edward...He came too early..."_

She said that she was told it was a boy. But that didn't sound right. Michael said that Tanya had replaced Bella very soon after I had left. If the two new slaves had been here almost a year then Bella couldn't have stayed more than a month, perhaps less, after my departure.

Later I could only blame my exhaustion from my journey and my distress about Bella. It was the only possible explanation I could divine as to why I hadn't noticed the inconsistency immediately. Standing in my bedroom looking at Tanya lying on our bed the realisation crashed through me.

I strode over to the bed and seized Tanya's arm, shaking her. She was startled and dazed but her eyes found mine and she looked afraid, confused...perhaps even a little bit guilty.

"Who told you the baby was a boy?" I demanded.

Tanya blinked several times and she stared at the hand that was holding her. I knew I wasn't hurting her and I didn't want to give her the chance to try and avoid answering me. "What?" She muttered.

"Who told you?" I asked and in my anger I shook her again.

"Edward I don't understand," Tanya's eyes were filling with tears and I dropped her arm. I took no pleasure in manhandling her. At that moment I was sick to think I had ever touched her.

Meanwhile she was still staring at me, her fingers twisting round and round in the sheets. Tanya's lack of an answer was almost proof enough but I wanted to hear her say it. "I think the question is simple enough. Who told you our child, the child who came too early was a boy?"

Her lip was trembling and she couldn't look at me for longer than a second or two. Then I realised it wasn't just her lip, her whole body was shaking. "The doctor of course," she whispered, but there was no conviction in her voice.

"Which doctor? Who attended you?" I demanded.

"Edward, why are you asking me this?" She was weeping quietly now and as I watched her shoulders shake pathetically, I felt as though the anger was draining out of me. It didn't matter really, I didn't need her to speak the words, I knew the truth anyway.

"There was never any baby." I said and Tanya clamped her eyes shut. At least she didn't try and deny it. I felt sick as I remembered her telling me her 'news'. The pain it had caused me, but more importantly, the pain it had caused Bella. It had been for nothing, all for nothing. I had left Bella behind for nothing. Tanya had lied to me.

"Edward..."

"You lied to me." I said as my words echoed my thoughts. I didn't raise my voice. I just reached for my tunic and began pulling it on.

"Why would you say that?" Tanya scrambled to her knees dragging a sheet around her. She was staring at me in complete horror now and I just didn't care. I didn't even care that she was trying to cover her reactions finally.

"Carlisle told me that he came here the day after you..." I stumbled over the words, "Lost the child. I'm a doctor, Tanya and I worked it out. At your supposed stage of pregnancy there would have been no actual baby, no way to tell if it was a boy or a girl." She seemed fixed in place by my stare. Her mouth opened and closed a few times. "But you didn't know that did you?"

Tanya went pale and then she flushed red. I didn't need to hear anymore. I spun on my heel and left the room. She called for me but I didn't turn back.

XXX

I had expected the anger to return. As I rode Seth through the streets of Rome I waited for it to well up inside me, the rage. But nothing happened. I didn't feel better for the news, but I didn't think I felt worse either. Tanya had lied to me, she had lied about something no one should ever lie about. As calm as I was I couldn't imagine how she had thought she could get away with it. Unless she had planned all along to fake the loss. I hoped that wasn't the case. That circumstance would make me think the worse of Tanya certainly.

Though, even as I considered Tanya's actions I knew that I was certainly no better. I had betrayed my wife just as surely as she had betrayed me and I had done it first. No, I was no better.

But perhaps, just perhaps we could be considered almost even. That idea held some appeal even if I wasn't sure it held true. Still, whether we were equal or not, we were certainly closer than we had been.

It didn't matter, not at this moment. Freed, though probably not forever, from my guilt about my wife I rode Seth straight to Jasper's house. I dismounted quickly and inelegantly but I could hear my heart beating in my ears and it was hard to focus on anything. There was only Jasper's door and the possibility that Bella might be somewhere behind it. I tied Seth up and went to knock without thinking further.

The door was opened by a slave I recognised though I could not immediately place him. I nodded, "Edward Cullen, I'm here to see your Dominus." The man nodded and pulled the door open wider. I stepped inside and looked up and up. This man was enormously tall, taller even than Emmett and wider across the shoulder. His skin was a pleasant colour, just darker than honey and suddenly I remembered him. "You belonged to my brother did you not? I was there the day he bought you."

"Yes master, my name is Jacob. I am here only to collect a gift for my Domina."

"Brother!" Jasper's voice boomed as he came to meet me. My eyes automatically drifted to the spot where his hand should have been, they drifted away just as quickly. His arm was fitted with an odd sort of glove. There were no spaces for fingers obviously, just a covering for the area. Jasper clapped me on the shoulder with his other hand. "It is good to see you home safely. You're well?"

I knew Jasper had seen me looking at his arm, but if he wanted to ignore it, I was more than happy to do the same thing. I embraced him and kissed him on each cheek, "I am well brother, though not as well as you I suspect."

Despite the injury Jasper had sustained he was looking remarkably well. His skin was tanned and his hair was neatly brushed back. He was also wearing an unusually fancy tunic for this time of the day. "I would guess that Alice has been taking good care of you."

"You suppose correctly," Jasper chuckled. "She was furious with me for all of ten minutes before she broke down and began to fuss. She hasn't stopped yet." The glee on his face told me that he hoped Alice would never stop.

As though we had summoned her by thinking of her Alice appeared at the bottom of the stairs, "I couldn't stay angry with him, not for long." She was smiling at me widely and when I turned to her she hurried forward.

When she was standing in front of me she hesitated for a moment, then she bounced on her toes and gave me a brief, but firm embrace. "Hello Alice," I said and I grinned for the first time since I had returned. I had forgotten her tiny little features and the way her hair bounced as she did. It was much longer than I remembered and it fell almost to her waist. Yet somehow it still bounced.

I stared at her and my grin grew wider. She was...proof. Alice was real, tangible evidence that I hadn't somehow imagined everything. If Alice was real then so was Bella. I embraced her again and held her tightly, "It's good to see you Alice. Very good."

She rubbed circles on my back as though she was trying to sooth me. I don't know how she knew I needed the comfort, but she was right. "It's good to see you too...Edward."

I pulled back to look at her and a short almost hysterical laugh bubbled out of my mouth. She had the impish smile on her face I had missed and she had used my real name. She had barely changed and knew I should try to be delicate. I should work up to the question I was so desperate to ask, but I didn't want to deceive Alice. I had always been able to be honest with her in the past and I wanted to believe that hadn't changed. It might not be exactly polite, but she would understand. "Alice, is Bella here with you?"

Alice's expression froze and then relaxed, my question as not a surprise after all. She looked as though she was in pain when she spoke, "No, I haven't seen her in almost a year. I...can't help you Edward." Jasper came to stand at her side when her throat hitched. I wasn't any less upset. Alice and Jasper had been my best hope. Where else could Bella have run? None of the other options were good.

There were not many ways that women could earn money to live. I shuddered as I imagined Bella at Eric's. This time as one of the girls who lived there. "Tanya said she ran away without any warning. Did she speak to you before?"

Alice squirmed under my gaze, "I went to see her every day, of course. I asked her to come and live with us. Jasper said..."

Jasper stroked Alice's arm and smiled tightly at her. "Edward knows about everthing that happened before I left to join the legion." He turned to me, "I take it you didn't get my letter."

"Your letter? No, I started back for Rome barely two weeks after you." I hadn't received one letter the whole time I had been away. It was not unusual.

"I'm sure you know everything by now anyway. It just explained about Bella having left your house," Jasper stopped and looked uncomfortable. "It also warned you about Tanya and..."

I waved a hand to dismiss his awkwardness. "Tanya lied," I said adruptly. "There was never any baby." Alice's eyes widened but she didn't speak. Jasper looked terribly uncomfortable and after a moment I took pity on them both. "You don't have to say anything. What is there to say? Tanya lied to me and I..." I looked away, "I didn't check or make sure. I accepted her word and now..." I felt panic building. If Bella wasn't here and Alice hadn't seen her then I had to try and think of where else she could be. I had to begin to search for someone who had a year's head start.

"I'm sure she's safe Edward. I believe it," Alice reached out and clasped my hand in hers. "I would know if something bad happened to Bella."

"Did you..." I fought hard to keep any trace of accusation out of my voice, "Did you try to find her."

Alice nodded, "I didn't know what to do at first. I sent Jasper's slaves..."

"Our slaves," Jasper corrected her quietly.

Alice shot him a look which clearly said this wasn't the time, "I sent the slaves to the market to check there, I had them scour the city as best I could but..." Alice shrugged helplessly. Her eyes were wet and she seemed desperately sad, "She had just vanished."

I sank into the nearest chair. I felt as though everything was sliding around. Alice couldn't help me and if she couldn't no one could. There was a ringing silence and all I could think about was that I had to find her. Nothing else mattered. Bella was the only fixed point in my world.

I wasn't sure how many minutes had passed when I felt Jasper's hand on my shoulder, "Brother?"

I raised my head and saw them both staring at me in concern. Alice's face was streaked with tears that must have been shed silently. I might have been sitting there for hours making them uncomfortable. And it wasn't helping anything. It wasn't getting me any closer to her.

I got to my feet and cleared my throat, "I should be going."

"You don't have to go, you should stay a while..." Alice began but I cut her off.

"I would love to hide here. I don't want to go home and face my wife and her lies. But hiding and running away..." I sighed heavily. "It hasn't solved anything."

Without another word I made for the door. I wanted to get back on Seth and go to Eric's. Bella was familiar with the place and perhaps she might have gone there. Though why she would do that when she could have been safe with her friend I couldn't understand. Surely Alice would have checked there anyway.

Still, I wanted to go and see for myself, it was the only starting place I could imagine. I pulled open Jasper's door and went to untie Seth's reins. I mounted up in a kind of trance and was some distance away when I heard Jasper's voice.

"Brother! Edward wait!" I pulled Seth to a stop and turned around. Jasper was hurrying towards me looking very nervous, "I don't have more than a second." He glanced nervously behind him. "Bella's here. She's been here, with Alice, ever since she left your house."

I stared at him for a full second trying to force his words to make sense. I had just heard them tell me that they hadn't seen Bella in a year. How could she be so close? "I don't understand, why didn't you..."

"I wanted to tell you, Alice wanted to tell you, but Bella begged us not to. She doesn't want you to know where she is but I..." He looked at me and I knew it had cost him a lot to tell me this. Alice wouldn't betray Bella's confidence and I had to respect that. Jasper had intended to keep the secret for his wife's sake but, after all, we were brothers.

"Jasper, is she..."

"I can't stay. I just had to tell you." He glanced nervously over his shoudler again, "Alice is going to the baths with Rosalie tomorrow. Bella never goes with them because Rosalie doesn't know she's here. She doesn't leave the house unless she's disguised. You can come then, maybe an hour before sun down." Jasper seemed to struggle with himself, "There is so much more you need to know, but I don't have time."

He turned and headed back to his house, "Jasper, wait. What else do I need to know? Why doesn't Bella want me to know where she is?"

"I don't have time to talk. You will just have to ask her yourself tomorrow." He smiled and nodded and then hurried back to his home and his wife. The wife who would probably be very angry if she knew what Jasper had just told me.

I didn't feel any animosity to either of them. All I felt was a kind of rush. Bella was alive, she was safe. She was so close by and I almost turned Seth around and battered down Jasper's door. I wanted to see her and hold her and...

I wasn't sure how to finish the sentence, I didn't know if Bella wanted anything from me anymore. But I knew what I wanted. If Bella still wanted me, I would not hesitate again. I would leave Tanya to do whatever she wanted to do with her life. I would divorce her so quickly it would make her head spin, immediately in fact. I considered discussing it with my father first, but I knew he would support my decision.

More than anything I wanted it to be over between us, now. I would even have a type of excuse, one that would be understandable from her family's point of view.

Tanya would probably claim it was her idea to divorce rather than admit to her deception. Either way I didn't care, I would not hesitate again.

XXX

I pushed open the door to the courtyard and was about to head straight to the house when I saw Tanya seated at the table. I had never seen her face so pale. Her eyes were swollen and red; she had obviously been crying for hours. The sight of her in so much distress barely registered with me. I knew that I should feel some compassion for her but I couldn't.

If she hadn't told me her filthy lies we would have divorced. Perhaps that was a selfish thought, but not totally. If we had parted, Tanya might have found happiness with a man who loved her. Surely that was the better way. I couldn't believe that she liked being married to me, when she must know that I didn't, and had never, loved her.

"I don't want to talk to you now," I said and I began to walk around the table. Tanya got to her feet but didn't approach me.

"I understand that, I truly do. But even if you don't want to talk, I need you to listen."

I stopped but I didn't turn to face her, "What would you like to say?" My voice was eeriely calm, even to me.

"I want to tell you that I'm sorry. I lied and I'm sorry. But I was so afraid Edward. I was so afraid all the time." Her voice was breaking again and I could hear the tears that were close.

"Afraid of what?" I asked.

"That you would cast me aside. I know you never wanted to be my husband and I thought..." I turned back to her and saw her fingers twisting together again. "I thought if we had a child it would be different."

Tanya was not wrong. If she had truly been pregnant and given birth to our child, things would certainly have been different. We would both have loved the child, I knew it. But I didn't believe that meant that we would have cared for each other anymore. "How could you lie about something like that? How did you ever think you would get away with it?"

"I...I didn't think. I just...I knew...I knew..." Sobs racked Tanya and she dragged her hands through her hair in frustration. For the first time she looked a little angry, "I knew that you were fucking Bella and I...I was more afraid then ever."

For the first time her words stymied me. I had never imagined that she knew about Bella. "How did you..?"

Tanya cut me off, "I always knew." She shook her head sadly. "I would guess it started around Esme's birthday." I couldn't find the words to speak so I just waited. "I could see it Edward, the way you looked at her when you thought I wouldn't notice, it was...obvious." She glared at me, "Then when I payed a bit more attention...well, the view of the courtyard from our room is excellent." I swallowed heavily. She had seen Bella sneaking out, of course she had, I hadn't been as careful as I thought.

"I didn't really care at first, but when you started to leave our bed at night to go to hers..." I gulped again. "I was afraid Edward. I thought you were going to divorce me so I panicked. I told you a stupid lie and I'm sorry."

I stared hard at her and I felt as though I was seeing her properly for the first time. "You were right. I wanted to leave you." Tanya covered her face with her hands and sobbed. "Tanya, why are you trying so hard to keep me?"

"Because I love you Edward." She peeked out from behind her fingers and suddenly I felt very tired. I just didn't believe her.

"Do you?" I asked. "Do you truly love me or do you just want me because you can't have me?."

"You are my husband, we belong to each other." She looked a little angry again but I would not be drawn into an argument. It wasn't worth it.

"We don't belong to each other Tanya. You don't love me, no more than I love you. We are two people shackled together and..." I took a deep breath, "I intend to put an end to it." As soon as the words were out I felt better; as though a weight had been lifted from me. Whether Bella wanted me or not, I would not continue this farce.

Tanya did not feel the same obviously. She sobbed hard as she tried to speak, "You...you're going to leave me?"

I nodded, "It's the right thing to do Tanya." She hurried toward me but I took a step back, "No, I mean it. This must stop."

"But you don't even know where Bella is. No one does. Why should we part now? Why can't we try, both really try hard to make this work?" She reached out for me and I took her hands in mine and held them away.

I considered telling her that I knew exactly where Bella was, but I didn't. It would be cruel to tell her. Instead I told her the truth as I saw it, "Because it shouldn't be this difficult Tanya. It shouldn't be this hard to love someone. I betrayed you, I know it and I am not proud. If I loved you I wouldn't have done it. I have no excuse." Tanya was still sobbing and trying to free her hands but I held them fast. "And you wouldn't have lied to me about something so important if you loved me."

"I lied to you because I love you, I lied to keep you."

"You can't keep me anymore Tanya. I'm sorry, I should never have agreed to our marriage. It was wrong of me." Once I began I couldn't seem to stop telling the truth.

Tanya was shaking her head, "It wasn't always easy, but it wasn't always so bad. Bella ruined everything, but she's gone now."

I pushed her away from me firmly but gently, "It doesn't matter whether she's here or not. I fell in love with her Tanya. I can't make it go away and I'm tired of trying."

"Edward..."

"No, no more." I went to turn back to the house, and Tanya seized my hand, "Take some time to think about what you want to tell people."

"Why can't we tell them the truth? That you are divorcing...have divorced your wife for a slave. You are divorcing Tanya Denali for a slave!" Two bright spots appeared high on her cheeks as she spoke.

"I know you're angry and hurt and that I should tell you that I will let you say anything you want. But I won't." I pulled free and walked to the house and paused, "I won't let you start a war between our families over our mistakes. Too many people would suffer and I won't allow it."

"You intend to stop me?"

"I can't stop you, but if you tell your truth, I will tell mine. I will make public your lie and I don't think your family will be pleased with that either."

I heard Tanya gasp behind me. I didn't turn to look at her, "Edward, please...I love you."

When threats didn't work Tanya switched to begging and back again. I gave a humourless laugh, "I don't believe you." I left the courtyard and went straight to one of the rooms we kept for guests. "Our marriage is at an end from this moment Tanya. I think we will both be glad of it."

XXX


	11. Chapter 11

**A/N I have been awake for forty hours straight and I feel like I might be dying. I've just returned from a five day sailing trip (the weather in England has been rough) and we had so much trouble that it took eight hours longer to get back than we expected. I don't think I have ever been this tired.**

**Only my deep and abiding love for my readers and reviewers is keeping me conscious. It's Tuesday and that means: Update!**

**Fortunately I wrote most of this before I went. If there are any spelling mistakes please forgive me. Have mercy!**

**Special nod to Mari84 who dropped me a review. Hi!**

**Quick, but double thank yous to the most awesome of my reviewers. To weekitty, x123, vhawk730, t3r35a22, kgunter34, Cockerspanmom, COURTNEY1022, Liz2009, mayi84, and sujari6. You wonderful women (I know that's most of you anyway, think it's all of you), who each took time to review two chapters in one week. You guys are the best.**

**I'm uploading, then I'm sleeping.**

Chapter eleven

I woke with one thing on my mind: Bella. The sun was barely up but I didn't care. I knew where she was and I was going to see her today no matter what. If for some reason, Alice decided not to go out I knew I wouldn't be deterred. Nothing was going to keep me from her side.

Telling Tanya the truth last night had been so cathartic and I had to believe that it was going to be the best thing for her too. The misery she had gone through would never have to be repeated. She would be free.

I dressed quickly and went directly to the kitchen. Michael and Austin, I thought that was his name, were already awake and preparing breakfast, they were both startled when I entered. "Dominus," I noticed MIchael's knee bend as though he was about to kneel, but he stopped himself.

"When your mistress rises tell her I will be out all day," I said as I selected an apple from the basket of fruit on the floor.

Michael nodded, "Yes Dominus."

I left feeling remarkably cheerful and I was halfway to Jasper's house before I remembered that I was told not to visit until much later. I considered going to Emmett's but I didn't want to risk my visit delaying Rosalie. If I arrived, she might decide not to go to the baths with Alice.

So instead I decided I should go and visit my father. He should be told about my conversation with Tanya the night before. Despite my threat to her honour should her lie become known, I couldn't be sure that she wouldn't take the risk. If she was angry enough she might decide to take the chance that I would suffer worse.

With a heavy heart I turned Seth away from the place I wanted to be.

XXX

"So you see," I explained, "There was no baby. Tanya was lying because she was afraid I might leave her. She saw how much I cared for Bella so she lied."

Carlisle shook his head in disgust, "I should have known. I should have insisted on checking her over. I only didn't because..."

"Because she was my wife and you trusted her. I know. Despite our troubles I trusted her too. Even when I was hoping she wasn't pregnant, just after she told me, I never doubted her truthfullness. I didn't ever try to make sure that..."

"Oh, Edward just stop right there. I don't want to hear any more self-blame. This latest..." I could see my father choosing his words carefully, "Revelation, is just more confirmation that the two of you should never have married. Now just stop." He held both hands up in front of him.

"Stop?" I asked quietly.

"Stop blaming yourself, stop blaming her. Stop shedding tears for things you can't change." My father met my eyes and everything he said made perfect sense. Trying to force myself into a role hadn't worked. It hadn't worked out for Tanya either. We could spend the rest of our lives hating each other, or we could try and see it as a mutual mistake and learn to let it go.

"That seems like very good advice," I said finally. I didn't want to hate Tanya, I never wanted to hate her. I might not be able to stop her hating me, but I was half way there if I could forgive her for her wrongs.

Carlisle smiled and seemed to calm down, "I'm glad you think so."

I felt better now about telling him the last piece of information. "I told her last night that our marriage was over," I said.

Carlisle took a deep breath and then smiled a little. It was a satisfied smile, "How did she respond?"

"Not well. She insinuated that her family would be angry."

"I have no doubt that's true." My father sat back in his chair and thought for a moment. I decided to blurt out my own behaviour before I lost my nerve.

"I responded by threatening to make public her lie about her pregnancy," I said quickly.

"Edward," said Carlisle reprovingly. "That was unworthy of you."

"Perhaps, but I have no intention of acting on my threat," I rushed to assure him. "Whatever she chooses to do. I wouldn't do that to her. I'm just hoping that the thought of the humiliation will prevent her from demanding her parents do something."

"Well, on that note there is some good news."

"There is?" I had almost forgotten what good news sounded like.

"Well, it's not too important, but our family position within Rome has improved since last year. Your grandfather donated money to some men who later became Senators," he raised his eyesbrows but said nothing. He didn't need to, I understood the idea of a bribe. "In addition, or perhaps as a result, it seems likely that Aro may become a Senator himself soon."

"Impressive." I said though it was not exactly surprising.

"Indeed, but it might make it harder for the Denali's to attack the family. With your permission I will contact your grandfather immediately and let him know of your decision. He should be notified without delay. There's no sense antagonising the old man by keeping him in the dark."

"I agree, he's always been fond of me I think."

"Oh he has. A circumstance I hope will work to all of our advantage." Carlisle sank back in his chair and I couldn't help the smile that spread over my face.

"I'm sorry for the difficulties this will cause, but...I'm so glad it's over."

XXX

Just as the sun was slipping away, I reached Jasper's house. I didn't want Alice or Rosalie seeing me so I concealed myself in a large doorway across the road and some distance down. I could still see the entrance clearly.

Soon after I saw Rosalie's slave knock on Jasper's door. Rosalie was concealed behind the curtains of her litter, but after a moment Alice appeared in the doorway. She nodded and smiled at each of the slaves before she climbed in with Rosalie. I noticed that all of the slaves met her eyes and smiled in return. Her new found wealth didn't seem to have changed the imp very much. I noticed Jacob among the slaves that carried the girls away.

I found it oddly comforting to imagine them being with him. He was such a big man and I imagined he could look quite imposing if he chose. They would be fine.

As soon as the party rounded the corner I stepped out of my hiding place. I had only taken one stride when the door opened again and I halted, but it was only Jasper. I noticed that he did not lock the door behind him. Instead he glanced away from me, then his eyes swept up the road and found me. He didn't approach, instead he nodded and began to walk in the other direction quickly.

I almost followed him automatically, but Jasper was not why I was here. Instead I waited for him to round the corner as well, then I hurried to the door. I hesitated. Should I knock and announce my presence. Bella might not want to see me, she might refuse to see me.

I wondered if I should allow her that right, but I knew I wasn't going to. I had to see her. So instead of knocking I just lifted the latch and opened the door as quietly as I could. There wasn't even a creak as I closed it behind me and glanced towards the main room. I considered where Bella was most likely to be. As I was thinking that she would probably be upstairs I heard something that stopped my heart.

I heard Bella giggle quietly. She was not upstairs in one of the bedrooms. She was closer than that. I entered the main room and glanced around knowing that she was not in here. The sound had been farther away. There were other three doors leading off the main room. I knew that one led to the kitchen, one led to a flight of stairs that the servants used to get to their rooms and the other led to the dining room.

I didn't think it likely that Alice would allow Bella to live in the slave quarters and by the same token, she wouldn't be cooking in the kitchen, though I could hear other voices in there. So I quickly and quietly made my way to the dining room. Bella wasn't seated anywhere I could see but then I heard her laugh again, much closer this time.

Jasper's dining room opened out into an enclosed garden. It was a thing of beauty and had taken some time for Jasper to create. Emmett and I had helped him plant the trees and flowers that were now in bloom, Jasper insisting that no one be hired to help. He wanted us to do it together so he would appreciate it all the more. We had sat together many times and stared out of the big doors at the pink and blue beauty of the garden. Now, it was through the open doors that I saw Bella.

She had her back to me on one of the stone benches, one I had levelled myself, but I knew it was her. She was sitting in the last of the afternoon sunlight and her hair shone brilliantly, set off by the blue dress she was wearing. She was reading something but as I watched she bent forwards, perhaps to pick up something she had dropped.

As she straightened she shook her hair back and I caught a glimpse of her profile. I tried to stop it but I heard an audible gasp escape from my lips. Bella started and spun round in her seat. When she recognised me, half hidden inside the house her mouth dropped open. I tried to think of something to say but no words came to mind. Instead I just stared until Bella recovered herself. She swallowed hard, twice. She stared down at her feet for a second and then smiled wryly and stood up, "I didn't think you'd find me this soon."

"For a short time, I didn't think I'd find you at all." I wanted to go towards her, how I wanted to. But something about the tension of her body stopped me.

She was nodding and I watched her hair shine. It was still as fascinating as it had always been. "Jasper told you didn't he?"

For a moment I considered lying, but I knew I couldn't. Not to Bella. I just had to pray she'd be merciful, to us both. "He did. It seemed to cost him a lot though. If it helps."

"It doesn't," said Bella. "I don't want to make Jasper feel bad, he's been so good to me."

I took a step towards her before I could stop myself, "Bella, why didn't you want me to find you?"

She shivered and looked down at her feet again, "I...I was afraid."

Bella was the second woman to tell me she was afraid in two days, from her I couldn't bear it. "Of what?" I asked as gently as I could, "Of me?"

Bella shook her head miserably, "Of what would happen, what I knew would happen."

"And what is that?"

Bella opened her mouth to respond but someone else spoke first. A small squealing sound came from the direction of Bella's feet, which were hidden behind the bench. Bella looked down again and I knew I had misunderstood the gesture before. She looked back up at me for a second and I could see the apprehension written there.

I couldn't delay now, so I took quick strides towards her. Her hands clenched into fists as I approached but she didn't step back. Once I was close I was momentarily stymied by her, by Bella.

I hadn't seen her in a year and to have her here so near to me was...confusing to say the least. I wouldn't have hesitated to take her in my arms once, but now I wasn't sure of the rules. So I just looked at her. Her pale skin was still perfect and her big brown eyes were exactly as I remembered. She was even chewing on her lower lip. Deciding not to ignore the impulse, I reached up and gently touched her chin, freeing her lip.

Bella gasped when I touched her and her eyes fluttered for just a second. As I considerd throwing caution to the wind and just pulling her to me the spell was broken by another little squeal and I remembered why I had hurried towards her.

I looked down and saw a baby, lying in a basket in the sun, trying earnestly to remove her toes from her feet. I didn't need more than a glance to know the baby was a girl. My second gasp was much louder and I immediately dropped to my knees. Big brown eyes looked into mine, with an expression of confusion. No doubt the child was wondering who this strange gasping man was and why he was peering at her so intently.

I wanted to give her an answer but once again my mouth couldn't seem to form words. The little girl looked exactly like Bella. Her features were an almost perfect replica, even the brown eyes staring at me. I reached out with the tip of one finger to touch her little cheek and she reached out to grasp it in her whole hand.

The sun shone when it hit her hair too, but her hair was not Bella's brown, it was my copper. The baby girl had little copper spirals all over her head. She let go of my finger and suddenly she smiled widely at me and I felt my breath hitch in my chest. I reached backwards for something to steady myself and I felt Bella her take my hand in hers. The jolt that went up my arm at her touch finally enabled me to speak, "She's mine...she's mine..." They were the only words I could find at that moment.

"Yes, she's yours." I knew it was true, but it was good to hear her say it anyway. When I first heard the baby cry my mind had raced. I had wondered if perhaps Bella was hiding from me because she had found another man and was happy...and she had a baby. It would be exactly like her to try and protect me from knowledge that might cause me pain.

Now I knew that her reason must be something else entirely, because the most perfect child I had ever seen was staring up at me and she was ours. Bella gripped my hand as I continued to stare at our daughter. Finally I was able to speak, "She's perfect Bella. How old is she?" I almost didn't want to ask. I hated the idea that I had missed even a moment of her life. Worse was the idea that Bella had carried and given birth our child without me by her side.

"Almost four months old."

Something occurred to me then and I got back to my feet. Bella's eyes met mine squarely for once and I was glad, "Did you know? Did you know before I left?" There was no accusation in my question, I just had to ask.

Bella shook her head, "I realised a few days before I left your house."

I took her shoulders, "Why did you leave..." My voice trailed off at her expression and I realised how stupid my question was. "Tanya..." Of course, there was something else to be considered there but I wasn't sure what it was and Bella was biting her lip again.

"I couldn't have hid it Edward. I couldn't have hidden it for long anyway. I was so sick in the beginning and then..." She bit her lip harder and tried to look down. I caught her chin gently and stopped her.

"What..." I said quietly. As anxious as I was to hear her answer I was suddenly very aware that I was very close to Bella and I was touching her skin.

Bella apparently noticed too and her breath hitched, "It's nothing." She said pullng away from me a little.

"Bella, please tell me." This time I reached for her hand and she didn't pull it away. "Bella, this isn't going how I planned, I wanted to walk in here and hold you, kiss you and tell you that nothing has changed. And then that everything has changed. I...I wanted to beg you to forgive me for ever leaving you. I wanted to tell you how much I still love you. But now..." I held out a hand to indicate...our...baby, "I don't even know where to start. We have so much to talk about." I took her other hand in mine and she came a step closer to me. "I had it all planned," I said with an ironic smile.

Bella took a shuddering breath and stared at me. She looked as though she was steeling herself for something and then she seemed to have made up her mind. She frowned and then nodded, "Allright, we should do that." Her voice trembled.

I rubbed circles on the back of her hand, "Talk? Well yes we need to..."

"No, I mean. You should go ahead with your plan." This time she held out a hand to our chid. "If you still want to that is." There was no hint of a smile on her face. If anything she looked nervous as she spoke.

For a moment her words made no sense, I knew she couldn't be saying what I thought she was saying. It was too easy, there were too many things we needed to discuss. Women always wanted to talk about things first, as I knew from experience. So why did it sound like she was suggesting otherwise, "What...what are you saying, Bella?" I asked cautiously.

Bella took a half step towards me and I felt my heart beat faster. She was so close now, I could smell the sweetness of her hair and I wanted to touch it. I tried not to stare but it was hard not to notice her breasts pushing against her dress as she breathed. They were bigger now and even harder to keep my eyes away from.

I focused on her eyes instead and I was surprised to see determination there. It suited her. She squeezed my hands, "Hold me," she whispered softly. "Kiss me, tell me nothing has changed, just like you planned. Tell me you're sorry for leaving and I will tell you there is nothing to forgive, because I love you." Suddenly her brown eyes were filled with tears, "Please, Edward, tell me you still love me."

I had her in my arms before I knew I had made the decision to hold her. I slid a hand into her hair and pressed my lips to hers. I couldn't help the sigh that escaped me. I didn't know how I had ever convinced myself that I could live without her. Bella was like air to me, I needed her or the world around me didn't make sense; it became hostile and unfriendly no matter where I was. And she loved me too.

I heard Bella make a sound and for a moment I thought she was still crying, but the next second her arms were around my neck and she was kissing me desperately. I had thought to be gentle with her but Bella had other ideas. Her fingers clutched at my shoulders and I unwillingly remembered the last night we had spent together before I left Rome. I shivered in her arms and she held me tighter. "I love you Bella. I didn't ever stop loving you, not for a moment. If you'll have me, I promise never to leave your side again," I said breathlessly as I trailed my lips along her neck.

"Oh, Edward," she sighed. She wrapped her arms around my neck and held herself close to me. I turned my face into her hair and just breathed. I felt as though I had rediscovered a treasured object; something I had misplaced and whose loss I had always lamented. Now in a wonderful circumstance I had found it again. Only it was so much better than I remembered. It was perfect. "Will...will it be different this time?" She whispered.

Bella kept her face hidden and her arms tightened as she waited for my answer. I stroked my fingers through her hair, as I had wanted to do, "I will make it different, Tanya has not borne a child and there is nothing stopping me." I wondered if I sounded callous to Bella. But the words wouldn't stop. She needed to hear it all. "I told Tanya last night that our marriage was over. I'm free now. She didn't take it well, there are some monetary arrangements to make and I suspect there will be consequences, but I told her anyway."

She looked up at me with wide eyes. I was glad I could see her face but just as glad that she didn't release me. "You did?"

"You don't believe me?" I asked incredulously, "I think I'm wounded Bella."

She gave a laugh that seemed almost half sob, "I do believe you, of course I do. But it's...unbelieveable."

I chuckled at her words and watched at her lips curled up in a smile. I barely knew how to begin the conversation we needed to have, but all I really wanted to do was kiss her again. I had gone too long without her and now...An indignant wail cut into my thoughts and Bella and I looked down at the basket.

The baby girl was apparently not used to being ignored quite so rudely. She was looking up at us both and her demand to be included was obvious. I went to bend down but then I hesitated, "May I?" I asked.

Bella smiled and it was a real one this time; truly beautiful. "She's your daughter Edward. You don't have to ask permission."

I slid my hands carefully beneath the tiny, fragile body. She squimed a little but didn't seem horrified that an unknown man was picking her up. Once I was back on my feet I turned to Bella who was still smiling at me, "She's so beautiful Bella."

"I know."

"She looks exactly like you."

"I thought she looked more like..." Bella's words were interrupted by the sound of the door opening and closing. Jasper voice rang through the house, calling my name.

I answered and he came hurrying into the dining room. He froze when he saw me holding my daughter. Suddenly the warning he had given me yesterday, about there being things I needed to know made more sense. "Is something wrong?" I asked him. He didn't seem upset, but his sudden reappearance made me wonder.

"No, no nothing's wrong. I just wanted..." Jasper's voice trailed off.

"Yes?" I said with a trace of humour.

Even though it was subtle Jasper knew I was mocking him, if only gently. "Allright brother. But I've had a bad day. I've kept a secret from my wife, I didn't warn you what to expect and I didn't tell Bella you were coming. I am wondering how much everyone is going to hate me by nightfall."

"I could never hate you brother," I said sincerely. I didn't think at this moment that I would ever hate anyone again. Somehow in the last few days every wish I had ever made had been granted. Tanya had never gotten pregnant, Bella was safe, she was here and she loved me, I was going to do everything so much better this time. I didn't have it in me to hate.

Jasper, thinking of himself, let out a relieved sigh, "That's one of you."

Bella giggled and the sound was lovely, "I don't hate you either. Though I'm still tempted to tell Alice on you. Just to see what happens."

Jasper slumped onto one of the chairs round the dining table. "You just told me you don't hate me. Yet you want to see me flayed? That makes no sense Bella."

She laughed again, "I think she'll forgive you. She might even be pleased."

"Why would she be pleased?" I asked.

"Because she was much more angry with me than Jasper was; she wanted to tell you I was here. She said it was wrong to lie to you." Bella flushed with embarassment and suddenly she was very focused on our daughter.

I felt an upsurge of affection for the imp as I imagined her on my side, but it raised the question again. Why had Bella not wanted to see me? it was on the tip of my tongue to ask her, but I didn't. We needed to be alone for that conversation.

For a moment I felt sad and I wasn't sure why. Then I realised, it was the same sadness I had always felt around Bella. It had always come from imagining the moment when I would have to leave her. Now there was my daughter as well and I knew I was dreading leaving here and returning to my home, where Tanya would still be in all likelihood. I didn't dare to hope she would have already made arangements to return to her family. I envisioned several screaming sessios before that happened.

I could leave now, not before I got all the answers I craved. As I stared at my baby's face I wondered if I could do it. Leaving Bella's company had been almost impossible. How could I tear myself away from both of them now? This little creature had been in my arms for only a few seconds and yet I somehow knew that she would never be far from my thoughts; not ever again.

Perhaps there was another option. It was a foolish option, one that could risk antagonising Tanya at a time when I shouldn't. But I didn't care, about anything much, if I could stay here. After all, why should I go back there if I didn't want to? "Jasper?" I said suddenly.

He was startled from his thoughts, "Yes brother?"

"Might I prevail upon your hospitality for a few days? Perhaps longer if necessary?" I asked in completely neutral tones.

Jasper looked surprised but he didn't hesitate, "Of course, for as long as you need."

I glanced at Bella and saw the same expression of shock written on her features. I didn't want her to think I was expecting anything. "You have room for me as well?" I asked.

Jasper picked up the hint, "I will have one of the servants make you up a room presently."

"Many thanks, brother," I shifted my daughter's weight a little and turned to her mother. "We have much to talk about."

Bella nodded but her smile was wider than I had seen it in a long time, "We do."

"Could you start by telling me my child's name?"

XXX

Her name was Renesmee, I managed to learn that much before she opened her mouth and threw up all down my chest. While I was wondering if perhaps she didn't like me that much, Jasper was laughing so hard I thought he might crack a rib. I hoped he would anyway.

But both he and Bella assured me that they were thrown up on almost daily. Indeed when I looked down at my daughter she was still smiling widely at me. Although I knew it was impossible I could have sworn I was a flash of Alice in her eyes. She looked quite amused at having thrown up everywhere.

I was forced to follow Jasper out of the room and upstairs to change my clothes. I was annoyed that I had to leave Bella just when it seemed I might get my answers, but I knew I had to change. I had to smile when I thought of the look on Renesmee's face; like she thought it was funny.

I was getting myself re-dressed when the sound of the front door opening and closing caught my attention. I heard loud chattering and recognised Alice and Rosalie as the source. Though, while I could barely hear Rosalie, Alice's voice was almost shrill.

I looked at Jasper in confusion to see that all the colour had drained from his face, "Oh no. Why are they back so early?" He began to hurry towards the door and then stopped and seemed to notice I was there.

"What's wrong with Alice, why is she yelling?" I asked. She didn't sound upset, just very, very exuberant.

"She's trying to warn Bella," said Jasper as his eyes darted from me to the door and back again.

"What? Warn Bella about what?" I was much more interested now. What could Bella need warning about?

Jasper looked at me as though I was a fool. "No one knows Bella's here Edward and she wants it that way."

I suddenly felt like a fool as I understood, but at the same time I misgave. Everyone was going to have to find out sooner or later and I wanted it to be sooner. I wanted Carlisle and Esme to meet their grandchild. "But why? What does it matter, especially now?"

Jasper hesitated, "I don't...you might be right. Perhaps it doesn't matter, or it wont. But..." He took a deep breath. "Rosalie doesn't know Bella is here and Bella might want to keep it that way. Alice doesn't know that you know Bella is here, more specifically, that I told you she was here. Rosalie never knew anything about you and Bella to begin with and she will be angry. We can't just announce Bella and Renesmee without asking Bella first..."

"It's all very complicated." I summed up quickly. "And you're right, so what do you suggest?"

"Bella will have slipped into the kitchen through the other door," Jasper said thoughtfully. "We need to get Rosalie into the garden and then Bella can get to her room without being seen."

I felt a little despressed at his words. I was tired of Bella 'not being seen'. Nevertheless, I was forced to concede that this was perhaps not the best time. Bella and I needed to talk to each other before we were forced to explain our relationship to anyone else. I nodded, "Let's go then." As we descended the stairs I couldn't help but chuckle quietly.

"What is it?" Jasper asked.

"Even with this performance, Alice is going to know something's happened." Jasper only looked resigned and I tried to cheer him, "Perhaps she won't guess you told me."

"Oh, she'll guess." He sighed, "And then she'll probably murder me." He managed to laugh a little as we braced ourselves and went to join Rosalie and Alice.

Jasper was right. Alice guessed what had happened immediately. She flashed us each a look that promised pain later and then returned to her usual level of cheer. Rosalie didn't need much coaxing to get her out into the garden. The heat was stifling and she had been annoyed to find the baths too full of people for relaxation.

Alice had wanted to stay, but Rosalie had insisted they try again another day. Alice only gave a slight raise of her eyebrows to indicate how hard she had tried to persuade Rosalie not to postpone, but little Rose was stubborn too.

In fact as I watched them chatter it occurred to me that they were quite natural friends in that respect. Seeing them interact, I couldn't not notice the obvious affection with which they spoke to one another.

It must have been very obvious because I noticed it even though I wasn't paying as much attention as I should have been. I had been sure that I had heard quiet footsteps inside the house a few minutes after we had come outside. I was just sorry that I couldn't follow them. It was normally a pleasure to see my sister in law, but today I had other things on mind. Two very important things actually, my daughter and my future wife.

Rosalie seemed in no hurry to leave, she was enjoying being with all of us and although I tried to hint that it was getting late, I couldn't bring myself to do anything more than hint. Alice had food brought as courtesy demanded and Rosalie didn't seem to notice that I ate nothing. I was planning on staying here but I couldn't tell Rosalie that yet, it might lead to awkward questions. It came to me as the slaves were serving more wine; somehow I realised she was staying because I was.

As long as I remained it was a social, friendly gathering that might continue on into tomorrow. Rosalie didn't know I was in agony. She could send word to Emmett and stay here if she wanted. Except that I couldn't allow that. Knowing what I had to do, I got to my feet and stretched, yawning widely. Jasper immediately followed suit and exclaimed over the late hour. Alice backed us up with yawns and if Rosalie looked a little surpised at our sudden change of mood she didn't comment.

Rosalie agreed to let me take her home before I returned to my own bed and when she got to her feet a little unsteadily I realised how tired this heat must be making her. Especially in her condition. Feeling guilty about my lack of consideration I helped her to the door and made sure she was comfortably settled before I mounted up and we set off.

Remembering all the years Rosalie had been good to me I refrained from yelling at the slaves to hurry. They were moving at a perfectly reasonable speed, I tried to tell myself. Yet it seemed that they were deliberately moving slowly to antagonise me. The cool air was doing nothing to sooth me and it seemed just too cruel that yet again I was being forced to travel in the wrong direction.

When finally, Emmett's house appeared in the darkness, the light's still burning in some windows, I breathed a sigh of relief. My brother thanked me for returning his wife in one piece and invited me to stay for a while. Something about his tone made me wonder whether he had spoken to Carlisle since I had. He seemed to be trying to offer me more than an hour visiting with family; perhaps accomodation if I needed it.

Deciding it was not the time to ask, I politely declined and with promises to return soon, I was away again in minutes. I was able to go at my own pace and even then I wasn't moving fast enough. I still had to take care not to ride my horse actually, over people after all.

Once I had dismounted and promised Seth I would make sure that one of the slaves came out to see to him, I let myself into Jasper's house. I almost knocked, but if the imp was still angry I wanted some warning, so I lifted the latch silently and slipped through the door. There were no raised voices and although I kept a wary eye open, I only found Jasper sat alone in the main room. He was asleep in a very uncomfortable looking position so I shook his shoulder, "Jasper, brother you should go to bed." I whispered.

Jasper looked up at me sleepily and he rubbed his eyes. "You made it back then."

I nodded, nothing could have kept me from this house tonight. Where Bella was concerned I seemed to have a habit of breaking my promises. Whether I did it deliberately or not was not really relevant. I waved a hand towards the staircase, "Where is..?"

"Asleep I should think, it is almost the morrow." I felt gravely disappointed. All day, I had only longed for a chance to see them both again. "Renesme is always awake early." Jasper smiled, "There is plenty of time."

I nodded again, but I knew I still looked miserable, "Where am I...?"

Jasper cut me off again as he staggered to his feet and past me, "Last door, good night brother." I wanted to ask him about Alice's reaction but he looked exhausted and if it had been bad I didn't want to make him talk about it now.

"Good night, and Jasper..." he turned to look at me already half asleep again, "Thank you."

He nodded and saluted me with the arm that no longer had a hand attached. "Consider us even."

Before I could say another word he had gone from the room and I was alone. I went to the kitchen and found two slaves still awake. There was a young woman with red hair and a man who was helping her to replace the large cooking pots on the wall.

After I asked them to attend to Seth I decided there was nothing to do but go to bed and wait for morning. I tried to reason that one more day wouldn't amount to much in the larger scheme of things, but it didn't feel entirely true. In fact it felt as though I had lost too much time already.

My steps slowed and I placed a hand on my door, but I didn't go in. Instead I found myself looking up and down the hall, almost aimlessly. I couldn't do what I wanted to do. I hadn't seen Bella for a year. In the time I had been gone she had given birth to our child and I was sure that must have changed her.

We needed to get to know each other all over again before I would be able to come and go from her room in the middle of the night. There was absolutely no excuse for me to bother her at this late hour. If I knocked and made any noise I might awaken my daughter. Additionally, I had no idea which room was hers. I knew all this and yet I found myself hovering in the upstairs hallway wondering which of the other four doors it was.

I didn't want to risk knocking on the wrong door and having to face Alice...not yet anyway. I thought it most likely that Alice and Jasper would have the door nearest the stairs because the room would be the biggest, but I wasn't sure about the others.

As I was about to give up a heard a voice and recognised it even though I had only heard it for the first time today. My daughter had just giggled from behind the door next to mine. I felt my heart swell as I realised how much like her mother she sounded when she laughed. I wanted to see her little face again. I got as far as raising my hand to knock before my courage almost failed me. Then there was another giggle. It seemed a sign and I decided to take the chance. I knocked quietly on the door and in my nervousness, I didn't wait for an answer.

I pushed the door open to a lit room. The walls were painted yellow and there were large pieces of furniture that were good quality. A dressing table and a large ornately carved bed among them. I didn't get to see much more on my first visit because as I looked at the bed I found I was staring at Alice and Bella, both sitting cross legged facing each other. They were wearing almost identical nightgowns of white and both were barefoot. They had obviously been deep in conversation.

Renesme lay between them, again pulling at her toes and giggling at their refusal to come off. When she noticed movement she looked towards me and grinned. She was the only one. Bella flushed red and glanced at Alice whose eyebrows furrowed in my direction, "Yes?" She said imperiously. I was eight years old again, eight years old and being scolded by my mother for helping Emmett to set a small fire.

"Ummm..." Was my brilliant response. "Wrong bedroom. Good night." I pulled the door closed behind me and almost fell over in my haste to get to the room Jasper had told me was mine. I stripped off my clothes and scrambled into the large bed that I could barely see in the darkness. Fortunately I didn't need to be able to see to enjoy the feeling of the clean, cool sheets on my burning face.

As I lay there considering how I could possibly enrage Alice further there was a quiet knock on my door. I only got as far as sitting up before the door opened and Bella was framed in the doorway. For a moment she hesitated and I could see her chewing her lip as usual. She was carrying a lamp and her features were illuminated as she slipped into the room and closed the door behind her.

She didn't speak immediately. Her hair was loose around her shoulders and she was still only wearing the nightgown which left her arms and shoulders bare. She came towards me to set the lamp down on the small table next to the bed carefully. Then she stared at me for a few seconds. My mouth had gone dry as soon as she had entered, my body stiff. I almost didn't dare move for fear I had fallen asleep already and was dreaming. The only window in the room was behind her and now she had put down the lamp I couldn't make out her features clearly. I had always needed to see her face to gauge her feelings and I peered at her in frustration.

"I'm glad you came back," she said finally, softly.

"You thought I wouldn't?" My voice came out with a rasp in it. I didn't want Bella to doubt me now, I wanted her to know that I would always come back for her.

"I thought you would, but I was still afraid you wouldn't."

"You don't have to be afraid."

"Good," without another word Bella reached up for the straps that were holding her nightgown in place. She pushed them off her shoulders quickly and was suddenly naked in front of me. I heard the odd sound that escaped my throat as I pushed myself into a sitting position. Blood was rushing away from my brain and it was getting hard to think.

I wondered if this was a mistake, but it didn't feel like one. All I knew was that I wanted her now, more than I ever had before. I should talk to her first, we should resolve things, but I couldn't focus on that need. There were others that had to be satisfied. I told myself that I could have done the right thing if I had the chance. Bella coming into my room and taking off her clothes surely meant I wasn't taking advantage of her.

The light from the lamp and the window played over the contours of her hips, her full breasts, and I all but scrambled to the edge of my bed to reach for her. She came willingly into my arms and I laid my cheek on her breast. I felt something soften in my chest as something between my legs hardened to the point of being painful.

Bella wrapped her arms around me and I let my hands travel over her skin. I stroked her back with the tips of my fingers and she shivered. The low moan that escaped her seemed to bring me back to myself a little, "Bella, don't you want to discuss...everything?"

My voice was slightly muffled as I couldn't bring myself to draw back from her breasts, but she heard, "We can, we should...but ohhhh..." My fingers traced around one nipple as she groaned and she whimpered when I squeezed very gently. I knew how sensitive her breasts must be so I was careful. "Edward...it's been so long..."

Her words made me ache with their truth and my hands went back to exploring her skin without another complaint. I wanted so desperately to touch her, but her legs were together and I had no access. I took her wrist and turned her around. Bella looked confused but moved anyway, then I pulled her to sit between my legs, her back against my chest.

Bella leant back into me and I turned my face into her hair. She noticed me hard against her and moved against me. If she kept at it, I knew she would unman me so I stroked my hands over her thighs, "Spread your legs for me Bella."

She shivered as i whispered in her ear but did as I asked. My hands stroked and carressed and teased until I was almost touching her, almost easing the ache I knew she had. "Edward..." she begged. "Please."

I pressed my lips to her neck and finally ran my fingers over her sensitive flesh. Bella trembled against me as I stroked, relieving the need inside of her. Her hands clutched at my legs on either side of her and she tried to move against my fingers. "Shh Bella...slowly," I whispered.

I could tell she was making an effort to keep still and let me pleasure her, but her breathing was already uneven. Her wetness coated my fingers as they slid over her most sensitive spot again and again and I wanted to taste her, but Bella was already squirming again and her body was rubbing against me. I almost tried to still her hips but there were better uses for my hands.

I spread her folds gently and concentrated on the spot she liked best. Bella gave a half cry before she managed to bite her lip. "Edward...unh...I...unh..."

I pressed my lips to her neck. I was panting heavily now, wanting her desperately but wanting to focus on her first. "You were right Bella. It's been too long." I bit down gently on the curve of her neck and her whole body shuddered violently. I felt more of the slippery liquid coat my fingers as they continued to move slowly and more gently. Bella's body relaxed. "Good girl," I whispered into her hair.

Bella made a mewling sound and wriggled in my arms. She pressed her lips to mine and her tongue reached out to stroke my bottom lip. With a groan I tangled my fingers in her hair and helped to lift her until was sat astride me. She was still kissing me when she slid a hand between us and positioned me against her.

My arms tightened around her as I felt her heat; I throbbed and ached as my body voiced its desires strongly. I didn't move though, I just kissed her mouth and held her but Bella didn't need encouragement. She lowered herself inch by agonising inch until I was sheathed inside of her.

My eyes flew open and I had to break the kiss to take a deep breath. She had either gotten better, or I had forgotten how good it felt to be with Bella this way. "Edward..." she breathed my name quietly and her hands pushed my shoulders down to the bed. I went easily, happy to let her do whatever she wanted with me. "You feel so good..."

"So do you," I said and then all thought left me as she began to move. She started out slow, rocking herself back and forth, back and forth and although my need was blinding I didn't want to rush her. Bella was right again; it felt too good.

My hands slid up her belly to caress her swollen breasts again. Bella made that delicious mewling sound and I pushed myself onto one elbow so I could swirl my tongue around her nipple. Bella tangled her fingers in my hair, so I concentrated on suckling as gently as I could while she rocked against me. The pleasure building was white hot and I didn't think anything could have made me stop.

As I lavished attention on both of her breasts Bella began to rock faster. She was pulling at my hair and it all felt better each second. Her movements became more frantic and soon I couldn't focus on anything but the feeling of her, hot and wet and all over me. "Edward...oh gods..."

"Yes Bella," I was the one biting my lip now; trying to hold myself together until Bella was as satisfied as I was going to be. "Just let go," I whispered and one of my hands moved to her hip to help her movements and she hissed. Her hands clutched at my shoulders as she cried out and tightened around me almost to the point of pain. She grit her teeth together to muffle her cries and I pushed myself up to cover her mouth with mine. Bella sighed as her body began to relax and I thankfully followed her over the edge.

XXX

Bella lay on her belly next to me and I found that I couldn't stop touching her. Her smile was small but so obviously showed contentment that I didn't stop. I traced the contours of her back, her neck, her legs, and despite our activities she still shivered with pleasure when my fingers touched the insides of her thighs.

"Shall we do that again?" She asked.

I chuckled, "As much as I would like to, and believe me I would, there's plenty of time. Where's Renesmee?"

"She's with Alice," Bella smiled guiltily. "I was told to march myself in here in no uncertain terms."

"Honestly?" I couldn't keep the disbelief out of my voice.

"Oh yes, you know perhaps I should be angry with you for comandeering my best friend. She always used to be on my side. Now she always seems to be on yours."

"I'm sure that's not true," I said hurriedly. I didn't want Bella to think that I would ever try to come between her and Alice. There's was a relationship any two women would envy. "She would always..."

Bella giggled and I stopped talking to listen to the sound. I had missed it so, "I'm not serious Edward."

I leant forward to kiss her gently, whenever her lips smiled I wanted to do that. It would be easy to spend the rest of my life doing just that. It would make deleriously happy in fact. But I couldn't do that yet. Soon, "Bella, will you tell me something now?"

There was a flicker of nervousness before she reached out to trailed her fingers across my chest, "If that's what you want to do?"

My breath hitched before I caught her hand gently in mine. I kissed the tip of each of her fingers and then held them so they couldn't distract me. "Yes, I want to talk to you. Will you tell me...everything now, please?" Bella fidgeted a little. It was hard to hide that kind of action when one was naked. "Please, we have to be able to talk to each other Bella. We have to be able to be as honest with each other as you are with Alice."

Bella studied my face for a few seconds, then she leant forward and kissed me much as I had kissed her, "What would you like to know?" She asked quietly.

Her words filled me with an entirely unexpected happiness, I gathered her into my arms and held her close. This was what I really wanted. I chuckled a little but not at her words. It just felt as though some of the joy I was feeling needed an escape. "I'm sure I just told you: everything. Start with the day I left Rome." I said and settled us comfortably against the pillows.

Bella didn't seem particularly happy with this. In fact she frowned and one of her hands clutched my shoulder, though she didn't realise she was doing it. "Oh, you mean the worst day of my life? Yes, let's start there. I do enjoy thinking about it."

To my horror, I realised that the memory would be as bad for her as it was for me and I was being very insensitive. "I'm sorry, I..."

Bella shook her head as though dispelling the thought. "Don't," she said as rested her head on my chest. "I don't want to talk about that anymore. I don't even want to think about it. It was..." She shuddered and her voice trailed off.

"It was one of my worst days too." I said as my fingers resumed their stroking of her skin.

As soon as I began, Bella seemed to relax more. I made a mental note to remember that. Bellla relaxed when I touched her skin. On occasion she also cried out and clung to me, but that was a different circumstance and besides the point. "Only one of them? What are the others?"

"Tell me your story and I'll tell you whatever you want to know."

"Edward..." She seemed to breath my name and a pleasant shudder went through me.

"I love hearing you say that." It sounded so much better than 'Dominus'.

Bella smiled at the look on my face but the seriousness was just below the surface; I could see it. "Edward, I...I don't know how to explain everything. It's all so..."

I kissed her again, it didn't become boring. "Try, please?"

Bella sighed and fidgeted for a moment. She had seemed supremely comfortable being naked next to me only a moment ago. Now she seemed awkward, as though she was thinking of covering herself, "Things got...bad after you left Edward."

Her hesitation spoke volumes and I something began to grow inside my stomach. It felt like a ball of sharp wire; the kind we employed during wartime to protect our boundaries. Bella was not just talking about missing me, there was more and I only had one idea as to what that could be. "Did she do something to you?" I asked quietly; dangerously.

"No...well, she was certainly more unpleasant with you and Alice gone but in truth I barely noticed. I assumed she was tired and irritable because she was pregnant and alone. Besides I didn't really care at the time. I was thinking my own thoughts, and praying to the gods for your safety."

"Go on." There was worse than this coming; I knew it.

Bella sighed again and when she looked at me she seemed resigned to telling me the truth. "Nothing really happened for those first few days. I just...cleaned and cooked and spoke to Alice when she came to see me. I also met your father by the way."

"Did you like him?"

"I think he is one of the nicest men I have ever met." Bella smiled genuinely and for a second, I just grinned back at her like an idiot. But her expression shifted and she looked upset again. "Some time after you left I awoke feeling ill and spent the morning emptying my stomach. It happened the next day as well. That was when I began to wonder, but I wasn't really sure until five mornings had passed the same way." Bella began to chew on her lip but for once I didn't move to free it. I wanted her to keep talking.

"I didn't know what to do Edward. I was considering asking your father for advice though I was nervous about doing so. I didn't even tell Alice when she came to see me. I knew she would insist I used the money you had left me immediately and I...I didn't want to."

"Why not? I left it so you could be free whenever you wanted. Why didn't you do it immediately? Even before you knew about Renesmee." The question had tortured me ever since Jasper had joined the legion and told me Bella was still in my house. I hadn't been able to understand her reasons.

Bella frowned as though she was struggling to find the words she needed. "I remember everything I said to you at the time Edward. The things about you needing to focus on being a father. I believed it all but I...I couldn't seem to leave." Her eyes dropped and I was worried she was about to make her lip bleed, she was biting it so hard. "If I left I would have been forced to accept that I might never see you again and I couldn't bear it."

I felt her cheek grow warm against my chest, "I understand."

"You do?"

"Even though I was suposed to spend the time away focusing on something; anything other than you, all I did was think of you. Every night I would imagine you were with me."

Bella pressed kisses to my chest, "We're together now." She whispered.

"And I thank the gods for it," I said kissing her hair. "But I dragged you away from your point." When Bella just looked confused I prompted her, "You knew you were carrying Renesmee..."

Bella swallowed hard and nodded, "Well, four days before I left I spent the whole morning rushing to and from the kitchen. I have never been so unwell in my whole life and I was so exhausted finally that I spent an hour just waiting for the sickness to pass. I had hidden myself in the washroom so I could be alone." Bella wriggled closer to me though she didn't seem to be conscious of it.

"When I was finally feeling better, I emerged to find Tanya standing outside the door." Bella closed her eyes and her hands balled into fists. "She was staring at me with the oddest expression on her face and I knew she had guessed my secret. Then she looked down at my belly and smiled..." Bella's voice trailed off. She was chewing on her lip again and I freed it gently. I noticed that my hands were shaking. I hated where this story seemed to be headed.

"She looked...happy and I...I thought I might be going mad, but Edward I was so afraid. She wanted...well, looked like she wanted...I thought she might want..." Bella was struggling so hard with the words i had to help her.

"You thought she might try to take your baby." I finished for her and I was amazed my voice was calm. Had Tanya been in front of me at that moment I might have acted very rashly. Even though these events were in the past and Bella and our daughter were safe, I was furious. I could imagine my wife's thoughts as she realised that Bella was pregnant and with my child. I knew with a sickening certainty that Tanya would not have hesitated to take Bella's baby from her.

She knew that any child Bella gave birth to would be my child and I would love it, never knowing the truth. How far would she have gone? I didn't believe that Tanya had it in her to take anyone's life with her own hands, but she might have put Bella in a position to die easily once she had the baby.

She could have simply sold her back to a slave merchant and I would have never found her. My arms tightened around her as I imagined my wife biding her time; waiting for Renesmee to be born so she could rip the child from her mother's arms.

Oh yes, I couldn't doubt that Tanya was capable of it. Her stupid lie had put her in an awkward position. As I was considering that, something else dawned on me. Carlisle had said that Tanya was furious when Bella ran away, then that she had 'lost' her own baby a few days later.

Had she truly been to brazen as to believe she could get away with her lie? Judging by the anxiety in Bella's eyes I had to answer 'yes'. Tanya's discovery of Bella's condition had been her best hope, perhaps she thought of it as a gift from the gods, and she would not have hesitated to take advantage. After all, Bella was merely a slave, what right did she have to a baby, her own or otherise, if her mistress wanted it. I fought to keep my hands from clenching into fists as Bella's had.

"At the time I wondered if I was crazy. Why would she want any child I may bear? But her face..." Bella had begun speaking again before she had taken in my expression but now it registered. "Edward, calm down. I got away, Renesmee and I are fine." She kissed my neck and for once it didn't sooth me. My insides were squirming with rage. "I might have assumed wrongly Edward. At the time I was sure I had to leave and quickly, but now...Perhaps I was wrong."

Bella was stroking my chest soothingly and I realised I was breathing heavily with surpressed rage. I shook my head to dismiss her last words. She hadn't been wrong about Tanya, I felt it. I didn't know what to do about it though and Bella was already beginning to look anxious. "I assume Alice told you about Tanya's lies?"

Bella blushed, "I'm so sorry Edward."

I let out an entirely humourless laugh, "I'm not. Well..." I corrected myself, "I'm not sorry I don't have a child with her. I'm sorry and angry that her lies parted us." Bella kissed my neck again soothingly and I let myself be soothed this time. At least I did for a moment before I thought of something else, "But now you know you were right. Tanya would have taken Renesmee from you to cover up her lies. Don't doubt it. She could have..."

"I say again Edward, I got away." Her lips were still kissing me, tracing the line of my shoulder.

I fought to keep my mind on the topic, "You should not have been forced to run." Then something else occurred to me, "Why did you run? Surely then was the time to use the money."

Bella squirmed awkwardly again, "Tanya knew about us Edward. I don't know how she found out or if someone told her but..."

"I know." I said quietly.

"You know?" Her eyes went wide.

"I only found out yesterday, but yes I know. She told me, she was trying to explain why she lied to me."

"It's not such a bad reason," Bella was biting her lip.

"You don't mean that," I said , shocked. If I wasn't very much mistaken Bella was defending Tanya. It seemed her kindness was beginning to verge on the abnormal.

"No, I only mean...I know how I felt when I thought I had lost you," her fingers clutched my chest. "When I knew I had to give you up Edward..." I buried my face in her hair. I didn't want her to be sad anymore. "I don't know how far I'd go to avoid that kind of pain again."

"You don't ever have to worry about that," I kissed her forhead. "I'm not anxious to inflict it on myself either. Remember, I thought of you Bella, every day."

"I thought of you too," she smiled mischeiviously, "A few times, I even cursed you to Dis."

"I deserve that."

"I mainly did that when Renesmee was being born though." She was smiling at me still.

"I definitely deserve that." She giggled and I wanted to stop talking for a while, but we weren't quite there yet, "Bella, I have to know, why didn't you use what I left you?"

"After I caught her looking at me I waited for an excuse to slip away and went to fetch the money." She shrugged helplessly, but I saw a little flash of anger in her eyes, "It was gone."

"She stole it from you?" Now I was angry one, all over again.

"Well, I didn't think of it that way at the time, because I was her slave and I hadn't exactly earned the money. But she must have known you left it for me somehow and why would you do that unless..." I could finish the thought in my head and nodded, "I was so afraid but I had no idea what to do. She didn't send me to the market with Michael that day, or the next. She watched me closely and..." Bella hesitated and stared at my face for a few seconds.

WIthout even asking her I knew she was checking to see how angry I was at this moment and how much more bad news I could handle. I wasn't sure about the answer myself but I knew I had to get it all over and out in the open now. "Go on..." I said and I forced a small smile from somewhere even as my arms tightened around her again.

Bella sighed, resigned to telling me what she didn't want me to hear, "She bought a heavy new lock for the house door...and one for mine."

This news acutally made my mouth drop open. Tanya could rationalise the new lock for the main door, after the trouble with James and in light of my absence. We had always had a lock, but I had given my slaves a copy of the key. Despite what some Romans would consider my stupidity, Bella was the first and only slave to run away from my house and it seemed she had had good reason. "She locked you in? Did you say nothing to my father, or Alice?"

Bella shook her head, tears in her eyes again. "I hoped to see Alice, but Tanya had Michael refuse to allow any visitors to enter for the next week except your father and she stayed close by him all the time. I was frantic and terrified I would not be able to leave. In my calmer moments I knew Alice would do something eventually, but what could she do if Tanya decided to lock me up? She could say I displeased her and she sold me. My mind raced Edward."

"You managed to get away though."

Bell suddenly smiled widely and I wondered what was coming. She couldn't have surprised me more with her words. "I can't take all the praise for that, it was Michael really."

"Michael?" It was a question and almost an expletive.

"He knew about us too and although I didn't like him at first, he got better."

"He knew..." Did everyone know? I should want to blush with shame, but I couldn't summon the necessary emotion. What did it really matter who had known what in the past? Everyone would know everything soon.

"We weren't as careful as we thought. Michael was sleeping in the stables after all. Even with your excuses about Jasper and Emmett, he's not a complete fool."

"He helped you?" I asked, still shocked.

Bella nodded, "He paid a boy on the street to take a message for Alice. I knew nothing of it until he came to wake me in the dead of night. When he shook me awake with his hand over my mouth I..." She shook her head. I could only imagine what she had thought at first, I stroked my fingers through her hair and she calmed.

"Michael he told me to be quiet, that he wouldn't hurt me and I...I believed him. He dragged me from my bed in my nightgown and shoved me out the door without another word. I don't know if Tanya gave him a key or if he stole it from her. I never found out. I was so surprised that all I did was stare behind me for a few seconds, trying to make sense of it. Then I heard Alice hiss my name. I turned around and...Edward it was like a dream. Next to you coming back...it was the most I could hope for. Alice's face peering out of the curtains of a splendid litter. Four servants there to keep her safe for once. She smiled and beckoned to me. I didn't hesitate."

"She brought you here?" I said somehow eager to hear the end of the story even though I knew how things worked out. I remembered Bella saying something similar when I told her about Rosalie and Royce.

Bella nodded, "She brought me here and I've been here since. She helped me through everything."

"Everything?" I tried to imagine Alice fussing over a pregnant Bella. I wished I had seen that. I had missed so much.

Bella smiled, "I don't think I've ever seen her so afraid as the night Renesmee was born."

"Was it...difficult?"

"It wasn't simple." She giggled and I couldn't help but laugh with her, just a little.

"You know what I'm asking," I said.

"Alice and I knew nothing about how to birth a baby, but Jasper's slave girl was more than we could have hoped for." Bella giggled, "She's not very good at cooking or cleaning, but she was good at that. And, I think she held her tongue as Alice told her too."

"I wish I had been here with you then," I said as my fingers continued their stroking of her hair.

"So do I."

I'm sorry."

Bella shook her head and pressed her lips to mine. After a moment she shifted on the bed and flung one of her legs over mine. I could feel the heat of her against my thigh and I groaned, "Bella..." Her name came out almost in a gasp, "One more question?" I asked then I groaned louder as Bella's finger's closed around me and stroked gently. "Oh..."

"Of course, Edward," she said sweetly as she moved her fingers back and forth.

"It may seem like a...unh...stupid question at this moment...unh...but why didn't you want to see me?"

Bella's fingers slowed for a second and I cursed my stupid mouth. It didn't really matter, she was obviously glad I was here now. "There was more than one reason."

"Am I that bad?" I asked with a smile.

"No...I love you that much." Bella flushed and her hand moved to stroking my leg. It was only a little less distracting. My conversation was suffering as a result.

"Huh?" Was my response.

"When I heard you had returned I wanted to see you, I truly did but..." She shook her head as though she was frustrated, "I had only just begun to learn how to live without you and I wasn't sure." Her fingers stroked a little further up my leg, "I thought perhaps your feelings might have changed and when you found out about Renesmee..." She shook her head, "I felt just like Tanya; like I would be taking away your choices." I held her close to me and let my fingers trace over her throat. I couldn't think of anything to say. Her worries were foolish to me. I didn't understand how she could possibly think there would be a time when I wouldn't love her; need her by my side. "I wouldn't have been able to keep it up. I was...just afraid. I was so glad when you came anyway."

"Are you still glad?" I asked with a smile.

"Very." Bella's fingers had inched back up and I couldn't seem to breath evenly. She was only a centimetre away. "Now is there anything else you want to discuss? Or can we..."

"No, I think that will do for now." I said and pulled her lips back to mine.

XXX


	12. Chapter 12

**I'm sure some of you will have seen your alert for the story and been sure I was about to announce that it would never be finished; that I was giving up. Well, it will be finished and I'm not giving up! I've had so many emails begging me to continue, ones from people who'd never reviewed before suddenly got it contact and I've been overwhelmed by the support. Thanks you to all of you. I will start trying to reply to them in the next few days.**

**The reason for the big dealy? Well I have a somewhat inconstant mind. In the break in updates I have been working on two other stories. One Twilight, one different.**

**I set myself a rule that I wouldn't upload either until this one was finished and I haven't yet, but anyone who's ever tried to write anything will know. When something's in your head it's next to impossible to focus on anything different. I have more than eight chapters for a new story but for some reason this one stumped me.**

**Well, not anymore. There's only a few chapters left and I've written three of them. I did it that way so hopefully, there will be no more long term breaks. Thank you to all the people who come back here to read this next chapter. Please don't hate me, I've been going as fast as I can. It was simple chance that 'as fast as I can' has been verrrrrrry slowly.**

**XXX**

When I awoke the next day I was almost afraid to open my eyes. If everything last night had been some kind of dream I didn't want to know it. I took several deep breaths and the scent of Bella filled me. I smiled and reached out for her, but my eyes snapped open when I realised I was now alone.

I sat up and scanned the room but she was nowhere to be seen. I almost leapt from the bed and was halfway to the door before I realised I couldn't run through the house naked calling for her. I took a deep breath and searched for my clothes. They had been moved from the floor, where I had abandoned them, and clean robes had been laid out for me. I noticed a fresh basin of water for washing and had to applaud Jasper's slaves.

I washed and dressed as fast as possible and left the room. I paused outside the door to Bella's room before deciding to knock. I didn't think she would be in there and when there was no reply I started down the stairs towards the main room. It was empty but I could smell food coming from the next room.

When I entered and found it empty I began to wonder if everyone had left during the night but as yesterday my eyes were drawn outside to the garden. In the morning sun Bella was sat breast-feeding our daughter. She was smiling down into Renesmee's big eyes with a maternal expression that made my heart thud in my chest.

I went to join them and Bella looked up as I neared. "Good morning," she said. "Did she wake you?"

"No, should she have?"

Bella smiled, "I brought her out here to feed her. You seemed like you needed the sleep." Unless I was very much mistaken I saw a hint of flirtation in her smile.

"Perhaps, but I will learn to keep up. I don't want to miss anything else."

Bella smiled and nodded to the space next to her on the bench. I went and joined her grinning like a fool. "You have time to catch up?" The question in her voice was subtle, but it was there.

"I have all the time in the world now." I wrapped an arm around her and our daughter, who looked as though she was enjoying her breakfast very much. I couldn't but approve her taste.

XXX

Alice and Jasper burst into the house before lunch. Bella had told me that they had tactfully withdrawn to the market this morning. Not that it had been much of a trial for Alice. Even though she now had slaves, she still loved to go to the market apparently.

Alice led the way into the house and immediately hunted us down. I was lying in the garden on a blanket. Renesmee lay next to me and I had been tickling her belly for over an hour. Her giggle, so easily elicited, made me grin every time. I hoped one day it would be as easy to make Bella laugh. She was still concerned, I could feel it. I thought I had her convinced that I wasn't going anywhere, but she was still worrying, most likely about Tanya's reaction.

Alice seemed to have no such concerns, or if she did she didn't show it. She came into the room with her arms full of fabric. Jasper and the slaves who had apparently accompanied them, were similiarly laden. "Good morning," Alice chirped. "I found a beautiful new blanket for Renesmee and Jasper is spoiling us too."

Jasper held up a blue dress and smiled, "Alice said you'd like the blue best."

Bella flushed and blinked twice. The dress was beautiful and would look wonderful on her, I could tell. It was a dark blue shimmery material that even I, no follower of fashions, couldn't fail to admire. Bella still looked a little red though, "I've told you to stop it, both of you." She gave Jasper a grateful smile though I thought it looked forced, "But thank you, it's beautiful."

Alice danced forward and gave Bella a kiss on the cheek, "It will look better on you than anyone else." Then she turned to me and smiled again. She bounced forward and clasped both my hands in hers, "Don't mess this up." She said making no attempt to keep her voice low. But she was smiling, she seemed to have a little faith in me; faith I had done nothing to deserve.

I couldn't think of a sensible reply so I just nodded firmly. I was still picturing the look on Bella's face when she saw the dress Jasper and Alice had brought back for her. She was clearly embarassed that they had spent money on her, but she loved the dress anyway. They shouldn't have had to do that. I should have been here.

She must have been forced to rely on them for eveything she needed, as well as everything Renesmee needed, and I could only imagine how that had made her feel. I felt Jasper clap me on the shoulder as he came close enough to hand, "Is everything allright?"

I nodded, shaken out of my gloomy thoughts by the concern on Jasper's face. I had no reason to be gloomy. I had Bella and for some wild reason she was still crazy enough to love me. I would just have to find a way to make up for all the ways that I had made a mess of things. "Everything is more than good," I said with a grin.

"And you and Bella...worked out your differences?" This time the question was purely to satisfy his curiosity, so I just raised an eyebrow at him. He had the grace to look embarassed.

"Does Alice go to the market often?" I asked as I glanced over at the Bella and the imp. Alice was trying to persuade her friend to go and try the dress on immediately. As Bella was still feeding Renesmee, this presented a problem.

Jasper was nodding, "She always waits for me to offer to take her though." He said in a low voice. "She and Bella both seem reluctant to ask for things. When Renesmee was first born they were using old cloth to swaddle her. I put a stop to that fairly easily though. If it's for Renesmee neither of them argue too fiercely."

I cringed internally at the thought and lowered my voice too. Alice and Bella seemed absorbed in their own conversation, "I'm sorry Jasper...I should have been here to help Bella myself...I just didn't know that..."

Jasper squeezed my shoulder, "Brother, she had hardly costs me a penny. Most nights, when we have no guests from whom she needs to hide, she absolutely insists on cooking for us all, the servants as well. I told her there was no need but...You know how Bella can be; how they both can be."

I remembered her stubborn refusal of my company when she thought Tanya was pregnant, "Yes, I know."

"Even Alice tried to disuade her...a little...at first." Jasper flushed. "I know we should have tried harder but she cooks so well and once you've had a few meals...well you start to truly look forward to dinner..."

Jasper was looking embarrassed all over again but I was chuckling quietly, "I understand perfectly. Once Bella had cooked in my house...well let's just say I put Lauren in charge of clean tables after that."

"My point was to be that there is no need for concern on your part. I would have happily paid HER if she had allowed it." For a moment Jasper seemed to lose focus, "Have you tasted the soups she makes? Any soup, they're all just..."

I was grinning at the blissful expression on Jasper's face when slightly raised voices disturbed me. Suddenly our full attention was on the women. Alice was pouting, "...don't see why not."

Bella sighed and looked at her older friend as though she was her junior, "It's not possible and you know it."

Alice frowned, her lip still stuck forward, "I know no such thing."

"Alice..." Bella shook her head a little sadly.

The imp threw up her hands in frustration, "But it has to be done sooner or later."

"Later then. Not yet." Bella's jaw was set and I could see that she would not give way.

"But I just don't see why..."

"Ladies?" Jasper spoke first and ever so mildly. "Is something wrong?"

Alice instantly turned to her husband, "Bella doesn't want to come tonight."

"Oh?" Said Jasper and I couldn't help but note that there was no inflection in his tone. He was not going to take sides here it seemed.

"Doesn't want to go where?" I asked.

"We saw Rosalie and Emmett as they were returning home today. Apparently they went to your house to invite you to dinner tonight. There's going to be a party of sorts to welcome you home. I have been told to convey a message from your mother as well."

"Which is?"

"No excuses, be there just after sundown." I sighed heavily. I didn't want to go to a party tonight. I wanted to spend another night as I had spent last night. "I also mentioned to Emmett that you were staying with us for a time. Tanya had been very vague as to where you were."

"What did he say?"

"He just looked a little confused. Then I mentioned that Alice's friend Bella was with us too. His reaction to that was...more obvious."

I sighed, "Did he give me away?"

"His eyes bulged for a moment but he didn't say anything..." Alice was smiling at me in a manner that left me very unsettled.

I didn't trust the pretend innocence at all, "And..."

Alice and Jasper both looked at each other and then the floor. Jasper cracked first. "Rosalie noticed. She was demanding an explanation as we took our leave."

"You mean you ran away from the wrath of little Rose?"

Jasper considered that for a minute. "I did. And I don't think I regret it at all. We had to save ourselves."

"Perhaps he won't tell her," said Alice, but even I could see that she doubted that.

"He will have already told her. Rosalie can be very tenacious."

Alice just nodded and sighed looking at her friend, "So there. Everyone knows now. Why can't you come with us? Emmett and Rosalie invited us too."

Bella, who had been silent throughout this little exchange now faced Alice wearily. She had Renesmee upright in her arms, my little daughter's head resting on her shoulder. "I can't attend."

"Why not Bella?" I asked quietly.

Her mouth dropped open and then she stared at me for a few seconds, "Edward, what if Tanya decides to attend? If Emmett and Rosalie visited your house before they spoke to Jasper well..." She shrugged, "I don't mind, it's a party for you."

That was exactly why I wanted Bella there. I wanted to introduce her to Esme and I wanted her to break the social convention and bring Renesmee. My mother would be so happy to meet her. I didn't know how extensive the guest list was going to be, but I wondered whether this might not be the perfect time to introduce Bella to everyone. She even had a pretty new dress to wear and I knew women liked that. I wanted her by my side. "What if I could guarantee that Tanya wouldn't attend?" I said.

Bella smiled a little sadly, "I still wouldn't go."

"Why not?" I asked, frustrated.

"Because...it would be cruel." Renesmee wriggled as much as she could in her mother's arms and she struggled to turn her head to face me. For a moment I just smiled at my little girl, it was easy to be distracted by her eyes. They were so much like her mother's.

I dragged myself back to the moment, "To whom would it be cruel? To Tanya?"

Bella nodded, "Yes."

"Bella, that's insane. After the way she behaved towards you, she deserves it."

She squared her shoulders and her chin raised an inch. Bella met my eyes squarely, "I don't care what she deserves. I'm not like her."

For a moment I considered arguing with her but I didn't. Instead I just let myself feel happy. Bella was right she was different and I wouldn't want to change her. "No, you're not like her." Perhaps I underestimated how happy I was feeling but my voice came out lower than I expected. Bella flushed under my gaze.

Alice cleared her throat and moved to relieve Bella of Renesmee. "Time to go and check on lunch, I think. What do you think little love?" Bella let her friend take our daughter and flashed Alice a grateful smile.

Alice turned towards the house and Jasper was hard on her heels, "I'll help."

I chuckled quietly and went towards Bella. She wrapped her arms around my neck and inhaled deeply. The feel of her against me was becoming familiar all over again and I was suddenly prepared to risk my mother's wrath. "I don't have to go tonight," I said quietly.

Bella's arms tightened around me for a second but then she sighed, "I would love to have you stay here, but Edward, I'm not the only one who's missed you I'm sure."

I knew it was true but I pressed a kiss to her brow and tried to ignore it, "I missed you most." I said stubbornly.

Bella laughed a little, "Good, I'm glad. But you should still go tonight. See you mother and father and brother and let them be happy you're home and safe."

"I will make sure Tanya does not attend anyway."

"You don't have to do that for me."

"No, I don't have to. But I want to. Our marriage is over and I won't allow her to pretend otherwise. Even if you don't want to meet everyone yet, they need to know I am not married to Tanya anymore."

Bella buried her face in the crook of my neck and pressed her lips to my skin, "Then you should go now."

"Go? Now? Why?"

Bella bit her lip, "Do you plan to announce this change in front of people who know you and Tanya without warning her at all?" She raised one eyebrow in an unmistakeable challenge.

The truly sickening thing was how right I knew her to be, doing that would be cruel. But I didn't want to go back there. I knew that I would have to eventually, but I much preferred considering it in the abstract. I wanted to stay with Bella and our daughter and learn more about them. Though, I knew this would not become easier the longer I ignored it. I had left yesterday morning and not returned since. Jasper had said that Tanya had been vague as to my whereabouts when she spoke to Emmett and Rosalie.

Was it possible that my former wife was still holding onto hope of a reconcilliation? I couldn't imagine Tanya being that much of a fool but it was possible. There was a chance that she was waiting for me to return; hoping that I would calm down and change my mind.

If that indeed was the case then I had to rectify it. When I looked down at Bella again I could see her smiling, a little sadly, and waiting patiently for me to reach the only conclusion I could reach. "Shall I wait until later? I could go there just before the party."

Bella shook her head. "No, you should go now."

"So eager to be rid of me?"

"No, eager to have you return," Bella leant up onto her toes and as her lips touched mine I groaned. I wondered if the effect she had on me would ever lessen. I hoped it wouldn't.

XXX

I grumbled to myself all the way through dressing. I grumbled a little as I mounted up and it was with difficulty that I managed to smile at Bella as I started away. I grumbled as I rode Seth through the dusty streets; I wanted this to be done.

Seth seemed to share my feelings. He never veered from his course, but every few minutes he would whinny and shake his head as though expressing his distaste for our current direction. I couldn't agree with him more. I was tired of scenes with Tanya and I tried to comfort myself that this would be the last one.

Straightening my shoulders I urged Seth a little faster, I was almost at my house and I needed to remember why I was doing this; for Bella and Renesmee, so I could go home to them. I still couldn't believe that Renesmee was real. She seemed like something I must have dreamed up. When she smiled at me I saw so much that wasn't there. I saw her future, the future I would see to it that she had.

That was why I needed to do this now. I couldn't be there with them if my past was still pulling me here. As I approached the doors of my house and dismounted I knew that this was not really home. The beautiful house was not home if Bella wasn't there.

With an even deeper sigh I patted Seth and promised him this wouldn't take long. He whinnied again, "I know boy. I wish we were elsewhere too."

I took several deep breaths and pushed the courtyard door open. The silence was the first thing I noticed. It had been the same yesterday. I wondered all over again which rules Tanya had laid down in my absence. I already knew that she had been ordering the servants to kneel before her and my face wrinkled in distaste at the thought.

I checked the kitchen and found it empty. I almost called for Michael but stopped myself at the last minute. I didn't know why but some instinct awakened and I listened to it. I always tried to follow my gut feeling about things. So instead of announcing my presence I made my way to the servant's quarters and checked each of the rooms.

There were signs of recent occupation, obviously by Michael and the two others, but no one was there. I considered the possibility that everyone was out but that was very unlikely. The door to the courtyard had been unlocked and that meant that someone should be here.

Leaving the servants quarters I entered the house. When I asked myself later why I had not called out then I had no satisfactory answer, but I didn't. I listened carefully, there were no sounds, at least not until I was halfway up the stairs towards the bedrooms. Then I heard a low groan and my heart fluttered in my chest.

I hurried towards the sound without any clear thought in my head. I didn't know what I was expecting to see, but I knew it would be something important. I went to the room that I had shared with Tanya and when I entered what I saw froze me to the spot.

Tanya was bouncing up and down on Michael. Her hands were braced against his chest and she was fucking him furiously. Michael's hands were flat on the bed and I knew the sound had come from him. Neither of them had noticed my presence and for a few moments I just watched, startled as I was.

Then a bubble of laughter burst out of my mouth and both Tanya and Michael froze. Two heads whipped to face me and there were identical expressions of horror on their faces. For some reason this seemed even funnier to me and I just laughed harder at the scene.

Tanya scrambled off Michael and seized the sheet from the bed. "Oh no," I said still struggling with the laughter. "Please don't let me interrupt."

"Edward, I..."

I held up a hand to cut Tanya off. I could see that she was preparing some kind of explanation but I didn't really care enough to hear it. I certainly didn't want to hear it from her; at least not yet. "Tanya, when you're ready I would like to speak to you." She didn't reply, her mouth opened and closed several times but no sound came out. So I switched my attention to Michael who was still frozen to the bed. His face was white and I knew he imagined some horrible consequences were to befall him. I wondered for a moment if I should punish him in some way, but then I remembered. This man had helped Bella at great personal risk to himself.

I had thought very harshly of him since the first day Bella and Alice arrived here and I had caught him spying on them, but the truth was he had never done anything to harm anyone. In fact, I hoped because of the lesson I had tried to teach, he had done something wonderful. If he hadn't helped Bella, she might have lost our daughter.

No, I didn't want to have to punish him and I didn't see why I should. "Michael, I would like to see you in the kitchen before I speak to Tanya." I almost laughed again, "When you are finished of course."

I span on my heel and left the room quickly. I hurried down the stairs and managed to get to the kitchen before I began to laugh again. The whole situation was so ironic. I didn't care that Tanya had been bedding one of slaves, in fact I was almost pleased. Tanya had always maintained an outward image of great piety. It was something her family had been proud of. This information could only help me.

Michael interrupted my thoughts. He had obviously scrambled into his clothes and hurried after me. I guessed he was hoping to alleviate my supposed anger by not making me wait. Michael spotted me sat at the far end of the table and although I knew it was wrong I kept my face a blank mask.

Michael seemed to tremble with fear. He hurried over to me and flung himself to the floor. "Dominus, I am sorry, so sorry...

As he grovelled before me I felt a little sick at myself. I had no right, moral or otherwise to torment Michael. I reached down for his arm and pulled him to his feet. He stood before me and kept his eyes to the floor. "Sit down please Michael."

He was too afraid to register surprise so he just obeyed me instantly. I got up and went to pour us both a cup of wine. Michael didn't look up until I held the wine under his nose. Then he looked up at me for a moment in confusion, until he remembered himself and dropped his eyes again. His hand trembled as he took the cup from me.

I took my seat again and drank a little to encourage Michael to do the same. After a few moments of silence he did just that. "MIchael, I found Bella. She told me about what happened after I left. Then she told me how she was able to leave."

Michael's shoulders tensed and if anything he turned paler. "Dominus..."

"Do you think I will punish you?" I asked in surprise. "Look at me," I said when he didn't reply.

Michael met my eyes and I could see that he did think I would punish him. Perhaps he just wasn't sure which punishment would be first, or the most severe. "I deserve to be punished Dominus."

I let out a small chuckle, "Perhaps you're right, but I don't think so. Michael will you please stop staring at the floor, it's not that interesting." His cheeks flamed and he forced his gaze back up to mine. "I know you are a slave in Rome, but you are also a man. Just for a few moments, pretend I am not your Dominus. I want to talk to you and it would be easier if there was no cringing on your part." Michael nodded but I could still see the fear in his eyes. After all, I could legally beat him to death if I wanted. I took pity on him, "There will be no punishment from me. You have my word, not for anything that's happened."

Michael looked at me for a moment as though he hardly dared to believe it. But I put my hand to my breast and made my vow again and his shoulders seemed to drop several inches. "I don't know what to say first."

"As wrong as it is for me to say so, the situation with Tanya is not of great interest to me. It's curious certainly, but I would rather hear about Bella." I gave him a small smile, "As I suspect you know."

There was the ghost of a smile on Michael's face too before he squashed it. "I...I didn't know what to do Dominus. I knew Bella was with child and I..." he took another sip of wine to steady himself. "I believed that...well I knew that..."

"Did you always know Tanya was lying to me?" I asked, suddenly more than curious, but Michael was shaking his head vehemently.

"She started..."

"Fucking you?" I asked bluntly with raised eyebrows. I instantly regretted it, Michael flushed a deep red. I didn't want him to stop telling me the truth. "My apologies that was unpleasant. Please continue."

Michael took another sip of wine, "She began calling me into the house the day you left. Twice a day. She was so...vigorous and constant but without any...she didn't seem to care about pleasure it was...there didn't seem to be any other reason for her behavior..." I was beginning to be concerned that Michael might faint away. I didn't think I had ever seen a man looking so uncomfortable and I took pity on him again. I didn't need to press him for the details. After my departure it was obvious that Tanya had decided to try and get pregnant as quickly as possible, so as to cover her lie.

"I think I understand Michael," I said calmly. "You don't need to fear me remember. I gave you my word that there would be no punishment." He nodded but still seemed a little uncertain. "Have you ever known me to break my word?" I asked.

"No Dominus."

"Then do not fear now."

Michael emptied his cup of wine, but he looked a little less nervous, "Yes Dominus."

"What of Bella?" I prompted.

"She...if you'll forgive me for saying Dominus, she has no skill at acting."

I laughed, "I know. It's one of the things I value."

Michael looked relieved at my reaction and continued, "Her pregnancy was obvious quickly, she suffered with it." I tried to hide my reaction to that news but doubted I was successful. "Then Domina stopped calling me into the house." I handed Michael my own barely touched cup of wine and he took it gratefully. "She began to watch Bella closely and I knew she had guessed. Within two days she had new locks on the doors. She bought Austin and Mark, she claimed they were to replace Alice and Lauren, and told all three of us not to allow Bella to leave the house. Not at any time, nor for any reason were we to leave her with any opportunity to escape on pain of death."

I grit my teeth. I knew most of this already, but hearing the lengths my wife had gone to was galling. I had been such a fool. All the assumptions I had made had been horribly wrong. I had assumed Tanya was pregnant, and that she knew nothing of my relationship with Bella. I had assumed that Bella would have the means to leave whenever she chose. I had assumed that Bella would be happier without me. The only correct assumption had been that I wouldn't be happier without her. It seemed I knew very little about the world after all, despite my journeys and experiences.

"But you chose to disregard her orders," I said. Michael began to look concerned again so I quickly added, "Thank the gods."

He looked relieved, "I remembered your orders, about not hurting Bella or Alice or any other slave and I thought of how imprisoning someone for no offence was hurting them." Michael drank more wine and I decided not to give him anymore. I didn't want the stress of this conversation rendering him drunk. "I considered how even though you were away, you are still the Dominus and I..." He struggled to find the right words, "I didn't think it could be right to let it happen."

"You were right Michael."

"I stole Tanya's key to the door while she slept and paid a boy on the street to send a message to the house of Jasper Hale. I didn't know if it would reach Alice but I hoped. I was waiting for her to arrive the next night, with my stolen key. I opened the door and told her to wait. She didn't like that," Michael smiled and it was wide enough to show me that the wine was having a definite effect. "She wanted to come in but I begged her not to, I told her it might cost me my life if she did and so she waited. I think I frightened Bella at first when I went to wake her but..."

His voice trailed off, "I understand. And I thank you Michael. I don't want to think too much about what would have happened if Bella hadn't been able to get away from here, but thanks to you, she did."

"Are they both well Dominus? If I may ask."

"Very well Michael, thanks due to you." No thanks to me though. I got to my feet and sighed, "I will resolve everything and you shall have your freedom."

Michael nodded, "Thank you Dominus."

To my surprise I realised that Michael didn't look very happy about this. "You're not pleased?"

"Y...Yes Dominus. Of course, many thanks."

"Michael?"

He squirmed for a moment and then the wine made him bold. "I don't know what I will do once I leave here. I have no true skills or talent. I like looking after the horses but..." He shrugged helplessly, "I don't know what else there is for me."

I considered this for a moment. Freed slaves could have difficully finding work in Rome and I understood his fears. "I will resolve the situation somehow," I said and I placed a hand on his shoulder. "I owe you a debt of gratitude and it will be paid."

"Th...thank you Dominus." Michael nodded and tried to smile. He still looked worried but I would keep my word.

"Now, if you will excuse me I have something else to attend to."

Michael got to his feet, the wine making him stagger a little. "Yes Dominus."

"Perhaps you should rest for a time?" I suggested and led him out into the courtyard. Michael agreed and went towards the servants quarters, still thanking me for my mercy. I stayed where I was as I listened to him make his way towards his room. Once I heard the latch of his door click shut I sighed. I would much rather have prolonged the conversation with Michael than face what was inside the house now, but there were no more reasons for delay.

I squared my shoulders and turned to the house. My stride ate the distance much too quickly. Once I was inside the doorway I hesitated and took a deep breath, preparing myself for the screeching I knew was coming.

Tanya's voice drifted towards me and when I turned I saw her slumped on one of the seats. "I'm here Edward."

I took a deep breath and went towards her. We stared at each other for a few seconds and then I took a seat opposite her. I wasn't sure what I was looking for on her face, but I found nothing. Her expression was blank, her skin waxy and her hands were twisting together again and again. "You look ill Tanya."

She have a mirthless laugh and pulled her hands apart. They moved to grip the fabric of her dress. "I've been waiting for you," her voice trembled as she spoke and I realised this was the one of the few occaisions I had seen Tanya looking other than neat. Her dress was rumpled and she had tied her hair back hastily.

"Are you afraid of me?" I asked, unable to keep the incredulity out of my voice.

"Yes...no...I don't know." Tanya stuttered.

"Why should you fear me? You are no longer my wife and I have no right to be angry with you." I supposed that I could be angry about the indiscretions on her part before we had parted but I wasn't. My answer didn't please Tanya though. Instead she turned watery eyes on me.

"So cold Edward..." she said softly. "You like to hurt me, I know that."

All at once, the whole thing exhausted me. "Why do you persist?" I pleaded with her. "What could you possibly have to gain by pretending to care about me?" She seemed determined to make this as difficult as possible for both of us and I couldn't understand why.

Tanya was shaking her head, "But I do care. I only turned to Michael out of desperation." She lowered her eyes and her fingers resumed their twisting, "I needed to be pregnant." She almost whispered these last words and I swallowed hard to try and get rid of some of the anger brewing in my chest.

"Until you realised you could simply take someone else's?" I almost hissed at her.

In the past Tanya would have responded with as much anger as I was capable of matching. Now she didn't, she just looked tired, "I told you. I was desperate."

I could happily have shaken her. She spoke as though she was justified in her actions and I was finding it harder to keep a grip on my anger. "How could you..." I began, but Tanya cut me off. She began to laugh, quietly and miserably.

"How could I? How can you be such a fool as to ask?" The laughter got worse, her shoulders shook with it, but tears were starting to pour down her face. She wiped her cheeks angrily and took several halting breaths before she was able to speak. Her voice came out in a whisper, but she didn't drop her eyes. "You brought them both here, into our house and I knew from the beginning that they had some power over you. The way you behaved around them...you didn't even bother to try and hide your regard. I felt...fearful of them even before I knew why and then you started..." Tanya wiped her face again, she wasn't even sobbing which I seemed odd. The tears just continued to fall and she didn't try to fight them. "I found I could accept it, my father used his slaves whenever he saw fit and my mother didn't care. He was just amusing himself with them but you, you had to fall in love."

Her words were making me uncomfortable and that didn't seem entirely fair given her other actions. "So you lied about being with child?"

Tanya just sighed, "I thought if I could distract you from her long enough, I could actually become pregnant and then everything would be all right." She got to her feet now and began to pace about the room, still wiping her cheeks sometimes. "But even that didn't work, you just left me anyway. And then..." Tanya flushed for the first time.

"You realised Bella was with child and you thought the god's had answered your prayers." My voice came out even, though I was feeling anything but. There might have been hate on my face, I wasn't sure.

Whatever was there Tanya saw it and straightened her shoulders. She raised her chin and wiped her face more forcefully. "Don't look at me that way Edward. Don't you dare. You brought those girls here, you lay with one of them, you feel in love with her, you got her pregnant when you wouldn't give your wife a child, and then you left her here for me to face." She laughed again, "So yes, I thought the god's were finally having mercy on me."

"By allowing you to steal another woman's child?" I couldn't think of anything else to say. Tanya was very skilled at believing what she wanted to. That was the difference between us. I had done some selfish things; things that I would given anything to take back. I would spend my life making amends for them and hope that it would one day balance out. Tanya would convince herself that she had never been wrong in the first instance.

"What else was I supposed to do?" She said, confirming my thoughts.

"You could have let her go? I left her money so she could leave whenever she chose. You stole it." I had only just remembered that I had another reason to be angry with her. It seemed a minor reason in comparison, but she was a thief none the less.

Tanya clenched her jaw but her voice was still mild. She stopped her pacing and met my eyes again. Hers were drying now. "If I take something from a slave it is not stealing."

The certainty with which she spoke made me angry, "Is that how you justified it? Did you feel the same about Renesmee?" My hands were shaking I was so angry with her.

"Renesmee?" Tanya looked confused and I realised my mistake. I wondered if I should try to cover it, but I couldn't summon the desire. She would know soon, I was not going to let Bella hide in the shadows any longer. This was almost the last hurdle. After this I just had to deliver the news to my family at large. There was no point in deception.

"My daughter, Bella's daughter." I said, and there was pride as I said it.

Tanya's face fell. "You found her?" She asked, her voice a whisper again.

"Yes, I intend to marry her as soon as I can." A ringing silence followed these words and for some moments we just stared at each other. I searched her face for something, though I didn't know what I was looking for. The quiet began to weigh on me as she conducted her own search and finally I threw up my hands. "Do you have anything to say?"

Tanya shook her head. "What is there left to say?"

I truthfully couldn't think of anything. I got to my feet and stared around the room. The walls were oppressive and I found I didn't ever want to be here again, "You can live here if you want to Tanya. Take another husband and if you agree, the house can stand as the return of your dowry. It's more than fair," I sighed heavily and ran my hands through my hair. "I'll collect some clothes, I will keep Seth and a few small things. I will also be taking Michael."

"A little jealousy Edward? Finally?" I looked at my former wife and was amazed to see some light of hope there, even now.

"No, he has been here long enough and I will free him," I almost told her that I would reward him handsomely for his help with Bella but I restrained myself. I didn't want to give her any reason to hate Michael.

I turned and began to make my way towards the stairs, intending to take everything I could need with me now. I was not coming back here again. "I did love you Edward." Tanya said quietly from behind me. I froze and turned back to her, "But you never loved me. You didn't want to."

"I couldn't love you Tanya, and I am sorry for that. It's not a choice I made."

"No one has ever loved me."

"I don't know what you want me to say. I can't...I can't forget what you tried to do Tanya and it makes it very hard for me to...But I'm sorry I couldn't love you."

"Can you go now? If you truly mean to."

I nodded and without another word I started up the stairs.

XXX


	13. Chapter 13

**Look at me! I'm updating again!**

**I must day I've been overwhelmed with the readers who've come back to the story. You're awesome! I don't think I've said it nearly often enough.**

**On to the finish line!**

**There will only be a couple more chapter and an epilogue. It's been mad but I've loved it. So here we go, next one...**

Chapter 13

Bella's mouth fell open with shock when she saw Michael enter the room behind me. I suspected she'd been waiting for me. Her face was paler than usual and I smiled widely to hide how that made me feel. I had to keep reminding myself that she had every right and reason to doubt my sincerity if she chose. Earning trust took time and I would have to accept it.

Bella returned my smile, "I hope everything is well?" She said and she nodded at Michael.

He looked a little unsure for a moment then he bowed to her. I was surprised and Bella looked less than pleased but I was delighted. She would be my wife soon and I wanted people to treat her accordingly. "Everything's resolved," I said. "Where's Renesmee?" I asked.

"She's asleep in my bedroom. Jasper and Alice have gone to help Rosalie and Emmett set up for your party tonight."

I nodded and tried not to let my excitement show on my face. Bella flushed anyway and I wondered if she could truly read my mind sometimes. Keeping my countenance even, I crossed the room to the kitchen, squeezing Bella's hand on the way past.

I pushed open the door. Two of Jasper's slaves were sat down eating, the girl was the same red-head I had seen the previous night, but the man with her was different. This one was tall and blonde, a little like Jasper himself. I nodded to them and waved Michael over. "This is my slave Michael, he will be staying here with me for a short time. Is there enough food for him as well?"

The girl sprang to her feet and curtsied, "Yes Dominus, there's plenty."

I smiled and nodded my thanks to her, then turned back to Michael, "Once you have eaten I would like you to make sure Seth is ready for my departure later."

"Yes Dominus."

I left the room and closed the door behind me. Bella was standing exactly where she had been before. Her eyes were on me and her breasts were heaving against her dress. I had missed the sight so much that I allowed my gaze to linger there for a few seconds. A flush appeared on her chest and I looked up to her glowing face. She could certainly read my mind.

"Everything's resolved with Tanya," I said very quietly. "I've told her she can have the house and everything I need is packed on Seth. I want a new life and I want it with you and our child." Bella shuddered but she still said nothing. "We can live anywhere you want. If you want I will move us in next to this house. I want you to be happy."

I reached out a hand and she hurried forward to take it in hers. When her skin touched mine I felt the tingles spread up my arm and I shivered. I remembered her as she had been last night, brazenly naked before me, wanting me to touch her.

I felt myself harden at the thought and my free hand moved up to her face. Her lips parted and I made my fingers stop, "I want to touch you Bella."

Bella kissed the tips of my fingers, "I always want you to touch me. Whenever you're not touching me I wish you were."

She smiled and I traced the line of her bottom lip. Wherever I touched her the tingles were present and I loved them. Bella turned her face into my touch and I let go of her hand. I let it drift to her breast and I squeezed very gently. Bella let out a whimper but she didn't move to touch me. Instead she just shivered, her breathing becoming faster and heavier. I felt her nipple harden beneath my touch and I had to stop myself seizing her. My desire for her was barely under control but as always I tried to fight the need to rush; to have her immediately.

I found her new passivity incredibly arousing and I was curious to see how long she could keep it up. I stroked her nipple just a little more firmly and then slid a finger gently beneath the neckline of her dress. Bella's breath shuddered but she still didn't move. I probed a little further, gently and slowly until I was finally able to caress her breast.

Bella still didn't move but she did speak, "Edward, someone could come in here."

"Yes they could," I said heavily. "I suppose you should stop me."

In response, and with a hint of a smile, Bella reached out a hand and rubbed my chest, "How soon do you have to leave for the party?" Her face was suddenly much closer to mine. I could smell her sweet scent all around me. Her hair was shining and I stroked my fingers through it.

"Not yet," I said, not ever if she wanted. "I would very much like to take you to bed for a while."

"I'd like that too," Bella's face was now barely an inch from mine. She moved forward and barely brushed her lips against mine, "Now, please."

My hands were trembling with the need to touch her but this torture was so sweet I was loathed to end it. She brushed my lips with hers again and the fingers that had been stroking her hair tangled themselves there. Before she could move back I was kissing her and I didn't intend to ever stop. I swept her up into my arms and carried her from the room.

Bella giggled and wrapped her arms around my neck, "I would have been happy to walk you know, Edward." She made no attepmt to free herself from my grasp. If anything she was taking advantage of her current position, her lips were kissing my neck in a way that made me tremble.

"Isn't this way more fun?" I asked.

"Definitely," she answered as I mounted the stairs. Bella was still trailing hot kisses down my neck when I carried her through the door and kicked it shut behind me. Suddenly delay seemed impossible and Bella apparently agreed. She wriggled to be put down and once she was on her feet she started pulling at my robes.

My owns hands were struggling to draw up her dress as it was too tight to slip it down. I took a moment to notice how beautiful she looked in it, but I knew she would look even more beautiful out of it. Bella was faster than I was, her hands had managed to undo my tunic and now she was pulling it over my head.

"I could stay here with you tonight," I said quietly. "I don't have to go." I barely noticed that I was now naked, I was more interested in the skin that was being revealed in front of me.

Bella smiled, "Yes you do. Your family needs to see you." She raised her arms and I lifted her dress away.

"The two most important members of my family are in this house," I said as I reached for her. My fingers slid into her hair and her warm skin met mine as she stepped forward.

Bella reached for my shoulders and brushed her lips against mine. "You have to go to the party Edward. We'll be here when you get back."

I groaned and seized her roughly. Bella moaned and our mouths fused together. I almost lifted her off her feet as I dragged her towards the bed. "Then we best make the most of this time."

"I couldn't agree more." I lay her down on the bed and Bella's hands kept me close, though they were running over the skin of my back and I never wanted her to stop.

The next second she froze and so did I. A plaintive wail had begun somewhere outside the door and when I looked back at Bella I saw her lips curve upwards in a small smile. "I think our daughter feels left out," she said.

I chuckled quietly and with a sigh I got to my feet. "Can I go and get her?" I asked as I reached for my tunic.

Bella nodded, "You don't have to keep asking my permission to be with your child Edward."

I grinned like an idiot. My child. I loved the way that sounded. I pulled the tunic over my head and passed Bella her dress. "We'll have a different type of fun today."

Bella sighed but she was still smiling as I left the room.

XXX

The evening had gone better than I expected, so far at least. I had announced at dinner, to my entire family that I was now divorced from Tanya and that our split had been mutally agreed upon. There were some doubtful looks passed between my two great-uncles but no one had spoken negatively to me about it.

I almost wished my grandfather had been there so I could gauge his reaction. It was his opinion that mattered and I knew that everyone's acceptance hinged on his. He must have received Carlisle's letter by now, but he wouldn't have had time to send us a reply. I could only wait and hope for the best.

I had said nothing of Bella or Renesmee as yet. I wanted to introduce her to my parents privately and although Alice had raised an eyebrow at me she had said nothing. I appreciated it. For a time it seemed that I might manage to escape any negative consequences this evening, but it was foolish of me to forget little Rose.

She had nodded and smiled sympathetically as did everyone else when I had delivered my news. However, when dinner was finished, she cornered me in her garden with murder in her eyes.

I braced myself for the worst and noticed Emmett trying to make himself inconspicuous behind her. I considered mocking his cowardice in hiding behind my pregnant sister-in-law but decided it could wait.

I would mock him in private as soon as the opportunity presented itself. As it was I had to concede that he did look very embarrassed at having revealed my secret. "Edward," Rosalie hissed once she had checked we were out of earshot of the rest of the guests. "How could you not tell me? You told my Emmett and Jasper and your father but not me! How could you?"

"Rose, please..." I held up my hands, trying to think of a way to protect myself as she advanced on me. I was forced to accept that there was nothing I could so. If she decided to attack me the best I could do was cover my head.

"Here I was all these years thinking I mattered to you, that I was important; as close to you as a real sister could be..."

"Rose, you are..."

"And yet when you finally decide to give your heart to someone, you don't even tell me..."

"You were not the last one to..."

"Apparently it's been going on for over a year. Almost since you met them!"

I glared at Emmett and he blushed; tracing a pattern on the floor with his toe. When my brother decided to confess to Rosalie, he truly went all the way. "Not quite that long..."

"Almost that long I said. Are you not listening? I am hurt Edward, very hurt."

"There's more," the words came out mumbled and I tried to straighten my spine a little. One cowardly brother was more than enough.

"How could there possibly be more?"

"Well, I plan to marry her as soon as possible, which I suppose you could have guessed."

"Yes, I could have. You wouldn't have divorced Tanya and risked the wrath of the Denali's unless you planned to marry your...Bella, I believe?"

"Yes, it's Bella. But there's still more."

"More?" Her head whipped around and Emmett almost seemed to shrink under her gaze.

"Don't look at me. I told you everything I know."

"Eventually," She hissed with venom.

"Emmett doesn't know this yet Rose and I am happy to tell you both together," I gave her a smile that I hoped was endearing.

"Well, thank you very much."

"Do you want me to tell you or not?" I asked with a raised eyebrow.

Rose crossed her arms with dignity, "Yes, I suppose."

I felt a smile split my face as I thought about my daughter. My chest seemed to be swelling with pride, "You have a niece."

Rosalie's mouth dropped open. It was a few moments before she was able to speak. "We...we do?"

"Yes," I said happily, "She's beautiful, perfect."

"Well, of course she is. You're her father." Rose waved off my statement as though it was obvious. Then she turned to Emmett again, "Did you truly not know this?"

Emmett held up both hands, "I swear it."

"Huh." Rosalie tapped her finger against her lips for a second. Then she stared at me, "Well?"

"Well what?" I asked, confused.

"When can we see her?" She was looking at me as though I was the most stupid person in the world.

I chuckled, "As soon as you like. I wanted them both to come tonight, but Bella thought it might not be appropriate given my other news. The divorce."

Rosalie was nodding thoughtfully. "Sensible girl."

"Why? Why shouldn't people know?"

She looked at me as she might look at small child who did not understand why they shouldn't eat dirt. "Edward, sometimes one has to submit to conventions and the rules of society. However little we may like them. Your Bella was right, it would not have been appropriate." I was still pouting and she scowled, "You want her to be accepted by everyone do you not?"

"Of course."

"Then don't make it hard for people to do so."

"Hmmm," I still didn't like the argument, but I had to concede it made a certain sense.

"A niece?" Rosalie was almost smiling now, "Well, with two boys it will be nice to have a little girl in the family."

"How do you know you carry a boy?" I asked.

"Alice told me." Rosalie said it as though that made it a sure thing.

"She did?"

"She's...good at that kind of thing."

"True."

Emmett interrupted us, "Can I just inquire, am I still in trouble?"

Rosalie tried to glare at him, but I could see the smile hidden beneath it, "It depends on how early in the morning I get to meet my niece and new sister."

"Am I in trouble?" I asked quietly.

Rosalie looked at me for a few seconds, "I liked Alice, I don't see how I couldn't like someone she loves so much."

"You'll love her." I said, unbelievably relieved.

"Then once you bring me something to appease me, I will forgive you."

"Thank you," I raised her hand to my lips and kissed it, already wondering which scented oil she would prefer. Probably something from a rose. "Sister."

Rosalie blushed and couldn't hide her smile. Then something seemed to occur to her. "Wait a moment, why didn't you tell Emmett about your daughter? You told him everything else."

"I didn't know about her."

"How could you not know?" This time it was Emmett that sounded indignant.

With a sigh I reconciled myself to having to tell this story tongiht. "I think perhaps we should discuss this once we've found ourselves some more wine." My eyes swept the room and landed on my mother who was watching us very curiously. "Perhaps we should include Esme in this conversation too."

XXX

It was very late when I finally managed to pry myself away from my family. Esme had been as hurt as Rosalie not to have been a confidante, but in a much quieter way. Her disappointment at my lack of trust seemed to affect me more than Rosalie's anger and I spent more than an hour trying to apologise sufficiently. Rosalie finally interrupted me to announce her departure; this pregnancy had not been as difficult as her first, but still, she tired easily. When they left I took the opportunity to escape for a few minutes.

I would spend more time apologising to my mother soon. I had only kept the truth from her to prevent her worrying and I was still sure I had been right. She would have driven herself to illness with her concern. Still, I could see how it had hurt her and I was truly sorry for it. I was glad she knew now. In fact, I felt oddly sated now that all of my immediate family knew the truth. I hadn't even realised how much weight I had carried for the lie. It was so good to be relieved of it.

I retreated to the doorway that led to the kitchens, as Esme and Carlisle wished their guests goodbye. Tonight had gone as well as I could have hoped. All that remained now was introducing Bella to everyone. Esme wanted to visit tomorrow, to meet them both and I had promised her that she could. It occured to me that I should try and stagger the visitors. Too many people might be a little intimidating for Bella. My mother should be second. I would start with the most terrifying first and that was definitely little Rose. Esme would be all charm, I knew it.

The sated feeling blossomed into one of contentment. For the first time in a long time, I felt as though everything was going to work out for the best. I later came to the conclusion that the wine helped convince me too.

I stood and watched as my Uncle Marcus and Aunt Didyme were taking their leave. Other than Jasper and Alice, everyone else had left. Since the party had been given in my honour I hadn't been able to take my leave earlier. Now I wanted to return to Bella and my daughter. I came out of hiding and went to talk to Jasper and Alice. As I stepped forward I nearly collided with a slave I recognised, Jacob. He was carrying a heavy pottery wine urn and almost dropped it.

He gasped in surprise and let out a cry of dismay as the wine began to topple from his hands. Fortunately I managed to reach out and steady it before it could fall. "Oh thank the god's," the young man exclaimed. "Oh, I apologise Dominus, I wasn't looking where I was going and..."

"No, no it's my fault entirely. I was practically hiding there. I apologise for startling you."

"Oh, no no, it's..."

I decided to cut him off before he could apologise again. "I thought you belonged to my brother Emmett."

"I do, Dominus. My master sent me and another here to help with the party."

"Ah, of course," Carlisle wasn't like other Roman men who owned slaves to show off their wealth. He owned a few at any given time. It was the only way he could afford to give them each sufficient monies when they were freed. Jacob shifted the urn awkwardly and I hurriedly stepped to the side, "Apologies."

"Thank you Dominus," Jacob continued past me, down the corridor and towards the kitchen.

Remembering my original intention I went to join Jasper and Alice in the courtyard. Alice had relaxed now that all the guests had left and she was leaning against her husband's side. I could tell they were as ready as I was to depart. "So, shall we order the litter?"

Alice looked up and smile, "We shall. If you're ready?"

"I just need to say goodnight to my mother and father," I said, glancing over my shoulder. As though I had summoned him, Carlisle was coming to join us. "Is mother near?" I asked.

"She's in the house, giving the servant's their instructions. I'm sure she'll only be a few moments." I was impressed that my father was able to maintain his composure as he spoke. We both knew that my mother liked to supervise things like this.

With a sigh I turned back to Jasper and Alice, "We should have one more cup of wine, and father, could you go and hurry mother? It's getting late."

Carlisle smiled, "I'm sure I can manage. But I would suggest you have that wine."

My father was still smiling as he went to find Esme. "I'll go," I said to Jasper, who was still half-supporting an exhuasted Alice.

"I'll order the litter so it's waiting for us."

"Good idea," I said with a wry smile as I headed back towards the kitchen. As I crossed the doorway to the house I could hear my mother's voice, but not the words. I didn't need to. I was sure that at this moment my father would be trying to persuade my mother not to start tidying things herself.

I placed a hand on the wall to steady myself. Half of the lamps had been extinguished but fortunately I had grown up in this very house and found my way without difficulty. I could hear the voices of the slaves at the other end of the corridor and paid it no attention at first. It was only when I got closer that I realised the voices belonged to only two people, and they were arguing.

As deplorable as I found eavesdroppers it was hard not to hear the words as I got closer to the doorway. Once I was able to make them out clearly they stopped me. "...Bella loves me as I love her." I recognised the voice, Jacob. I was almost certain there were no other 'Bella's' about whom he could be talking. I felt as though something cold was creeping down my neck. I wanted to move, to move away or go into the room, I could do neither. My legs seemed to lock and so I listened.

The other voice spoke, it was another man and it was hissing with anger, "You can't marry her. She's not really a slave anymore. She's above you now."

"Bella does not care about such things. I have enough money..." My hands were shaking, I could feel them fluttering against my legs.

"To do what? Take her away from the friend who offers her a better life?"

"I should never have told you she was there..." It hadn't even occurred to me to wonder how Jacob knew of Bella's location. I wondered now.

The hissing voice continued, "Well, you did. And I tell you again I think there is something..."

"Don't."

"Well, she has a child, someone has to have given it to her," the cold began to give way to something else as I heard the slaves mention my daughter; something hot. It felt very much like rage.

Jacob sounded angry too, "I told you, despite what you think, I gave it to her."

There was a silence that seemed to resonate through-out me. I could not believe that I had just heard another man try to claim Renesme as his own. "I think the Dominus of that house has them both for his..." The feeling suddenly came back below my waist as I realised what the man was implying. I was almost through the door before I realised it.

For the second time that evening I almost collided with Jacob. He had apparently had enough of the conversation. There was rage in his voice, but not as much as there was in my chest. He was almost shouting when he came striding out of the kitchen, "I will listen to no more. You say I'm taking her from a better life and then imply she's a whore. Neither is true. She loves me and I love her. She will be my wif..." The second Jacob spotted me in the semi-dark the words died in his throat. His head dropped and he said quietly, "Apologies Dominus."

I knew that he had no idea how much I had over-heard. I suspected that he had no idea what such news would mean to me anyway. Or then again, perhaps if what he was saying was true, he did know something about me. The anger was getting strong, sense was leaving and when I was finally able to speak, I spat the words, "What did you say?"

Jacob looked up at me and I could see surprise written there, "Dominus?"

I took a step towards him and despite his superior height Jacob took a step back, "You are to be married? To the woman living with Jasper and Alice?" I was still finding it hard to speak.

Jacob's mouth dropped open and he raised his hands in suplication, "Dominus I..."

"Answer me!" My voice came back suddenly and completely. In fact it rang out, louder than I had ever heard. The other slave actually jumped in surprise.

Jacob didn't jump, if anything his spine seemed to straighten. "I...I have yet to ask her Dominus." He made it clear that he didn't doubt her answer. If anything, he seemed to be attempting to show bravery. It made the rage worse.

I took another step towards him, my hands were no longer shaking, "You said she loves you."

Jaocb bravado slipped, he looked a little afraid now. "I...I believe she does Dominus, as I love her."

The next few minutes were some of the clearest in my memory. I felt as though I was watching myself from above; everything was so clear. My hands just reached for the boy's throat and closed around it. His neck seemed to tremble under my hands and I heard a stuttering gasp. His hands reached up to try and stop me, but they hesitated. After all, I had the right to do what I wanted with him and he knew it.

My hatred of the practice of slavery was one of my defining characteristics and I had always been proud of it. Now I was perversely glad of it. Jacob's hesitation gave me enough time to propel him backwards. His whole body crashed into the door frame and his head snapped back into it.

He gave a kind of grunt, but stayed upright. I was as though I was acting in slow motion as I drew my hand back. Though things sped up when I felt my fist collide with Jacob's face. His nose broke under my hand and again his head hit the door post. He sank to the floor at my feet, his eyes fluttered shut, but I wasn't done. My hand seized the front of his tunic and dragged his body up.

Somewhere inside, the rational part of my brain was screaming. It was telling me to stop what I was doing. It knew that I was not in control right now, and that I could kill this slave with my anger. That small part of me flinched as my hand kept hitting Jacob's face and I was so angry I was barely feeling it.

I kept imagining him putting his hands on Bella and the need to hurt him kept getting worse. So I kept hitting him. My brain wasn't in control at that moment, and it couldn't make itself heard.

In the end, it was strong arms wrapping around me, holding me back. I struggled against them, but only for a second. As soon as I was forced to stop hitting Jacob, the red mist that had descended when I heard him talking receded. I stared down at the battered face of the slave, now lying unconscious on the floor and I stopped fighting.

I looked at the restraints against my chest and realised both my father and Jasper were holding me. I couldn't think of anything to say to them. The rest mist; the rage, was gone, but I still wasn't myself. I looked down at my hand, wondering why it was starting to ache, and stared at the blood all over it.

Then I remembered and looked down at Jacob again. His face was swelling rapidly. His nose had definitely broken, both his eyes were swollen shut and there was blood coming from his mouth. I heard an odd keening sound and then realised it was coming from me. I looked at Jasper again and then at Carlisle. My father was white, he was staring at me as though he didn't know who I was.

Despite that, after a few moments, he seemed to realise I was not going to attack Jacob again and he let me go. He hurried to the boy on the floor and immediately began an examination. "Edward..." Jasper breathed as he too released me, "What..?"

I heard a gasping sob from behind me and I turned to look. Esme was stood holding onto Alice tightly. My mother was crying, but Alice was just staring at me, her eyes hard. Behind her I could see the other slave who had been arguing with Jacob in the kitchen. I knew he must have gone to fetch help when he saw how out of control I was. "Thankyou," I said quietly looking straight at him.

The slave looked completely confused but he nodded his head anyway and said, "Dominus."

Since I couldn't bear to look at my mother anymore I turned back to my father, "Is he...will he..." I didn't know how to finish the sentence.

Carlisle turned to look at me, in a way I had never seen before. "I believe so, though it's not certain. There is damage to the back of his skull. We must wait and see if he wakes again."

I stared down at Jacob and felt suddenly, violently sick. I had killed men before, and I had found ways to live with it. This was different, I had attacked this man unprovoked. I might have killed him too. The world seemed to tilt unpleasantly and my stomach started to clench. At the same time, my knees gave way and I was falling. Before I could reach the floor, arms held me again, this time to keep me upright. My feet almost left the ground as Jasper dragged me towards the door and out into the night air.

When I had finished emptying my stomach and my vision had almost returned to normal, Jasper sat me upright on one of the benches. I stayed there for several minutes, breathing deeply to try and clear my head. My friend sat beside me, but he didn't speak.

Carlisle and the slave whose name I didn't know emerged from the kitchens. Alice was with them, doing her best to help them carry Jacob from the room and towards the slave quarters. I started to my feet, I wanted to help too, but Jasper put a hand on my arm to restrain me. "No brother. We should let your father handle this."

We both watched in silence as Jacob's large form disappeared into another building. When he was out of sight I let out a breath I didn't know I was holding. "He's in love with Bella," I said suddenly. The words just feel out fo my mouth.

Jasper sighed heavily, "I know."

My head snapped up and I stared hard at him, "You know?"

He was nodding, "I do. He's been in love with her for some time."

I felt my mouth fall open and a little of my earlier rage returned. It was an effort to keep my voice calm. "You knew about this and you didn't tell me? He wants to marry her!" Again I saw them together, but this time they were stood before a priest, reciting vows.

Jasper sighed again, "Brother...it didn't seem important."

His calm attitude was irritating me, "Not important? He loves her, he says he's going to ask her to marry him. You think that doesn't matter?"

Jasper got to his feet abruptly and faced me, finally looking at angry as I felt. "Jupiter's cock! Edward, do you imagine for a second that she would say 'yes'?"

It was a simple question but it gave me pause. When I heard Jacob talking about Bella, his conviction was so strong it had almost made me believe him. I had seen him as another thing that would come between us, just as everything else seemed determined to do. Now things seemed a lot less clear. I remembered Bella in my arms last night. I remembered the way she had kissed me and I was suddenly convinced I might have been very stupid to believe Jacob. "I...he said she loves him too," I said, with not very much conviction.

"He's wrong," Jasper answered, very certainly. He was looking at me as though I was the biggest fool he had ever laid eyes on and I squirmed uncomfortably.

Then I remembered something else, "He said he was Renesme's father."

That was enough to make Jasper look startled for a second, "I can understand that might upset you."

"Upset me!" I hissed.

Jasper held up his hands and nodded, "More than upset you. But Edward..."

His voice trailed off but he didn't need to say anymore. Again my eyes drifted to my hands,which were still covered in blood. "I know," I said quietly. "I didn't intend to hurt him so badly, on the masks of my ancestors I didn't. I lost control of myself."

Jasper took his seat next to me and there was another silence. Finally he said, quietly, "You know that you are Renesme's father don't you?"

"Of course."

"Did you doubt it?"

I considered the question for a moment and then answered honestly,"Not for a second." What Jacob had said had infuriated me, but I had never doubted that Bella had told me the truth. That was part of why I had been so angry. Now I realised that Jacob had actually been trying to defend Bella's honour, in a strange way. That brought to mind another question, "Though I don't understand how Jacob knew where Bella was. How did he grow to love her?"

"They met when Jacob came to deliver something for Rosalie. Purely accidental. He remembered her and Alice, but he was sworn to secrecy. Apparently he couldn't quite keep his vow."

"Apparently not," I would have said more but Esme and Alice chose that moment to emerge from the kitchens. My mother still looked pale and drawn. Her eyes were red from crying, and they were fixed on the floor. Alice had an arm around my mother's waist, she looked oddly calm. I started to get to my feet but again Jasper touched my arm.

"She seems very upset..."

"She's my mother," I said quietly. "I have to try."

Jasper offered no more objections and I crossed the courtyard to Esme's side. She looked up when I got close and half-expected her to turn away. Instead she met my eyes squarely, "Did he deserve his injuries?" She asked me quietly.

I had opened my mouth to apologise but her question caught me off guard. This was one of the rare moments I wished I could lie convincingly to my mother, but I never had been able to. "At the time...I was angry and I thought he did, but...no, he didn't." Esme didn't reply she just stared at me silently. After a few moments I couldn't bear it and I dropped my eyes. "I will never be able to apologise enough for my actions tonight, mother. I have let you down."

I was actually fighting tears of shame at that moment so I felt Esme's hand on my cheek before I saw it. I blinked to clear my vision so I could see her expression. I was amazed to see that she didn't look as angry as I expected, "Edward, you can not let me down. I'm your mother, it's not possible." Her hand left my face and she gripped both of mine in hers. "You have let yourself down. You are a better man than this Edward. I know you are."

As I looked at our joined hands, mine tinging hers with blood, I was sure she was wrong.


End file.
